Chapter 33
Chapter
Thirty-Three
Kainda
A n on edge, Elijah, jumped at every shadow. It’s hard to blame him being this close to where he nearly died; it played on his PTSD, especially now that the bracelet was off. Seeing the stress on his face, caused piercing pain to my gut and I rethought my suggestion that he remove it. Seeing the effects slowly creep back in and the changes in him as a result, made me feel like a bitch. My selfishness was the reason he suffered, when that bracelet would give him relief. But when I suggested it, he brushed it off, saying he’d rather have the connection with me and he could deal with it.
He had nightmares every night, just like I’d predicted, pulling me from sleep next to him. The whites of his eyes wide glowing in the dark, sweat drenched, shaking like an earthquake, and heart racing I could faintly see it through his chest. After the first nightmare, I’d begged him to put it back on, but he still refused. So every time his agitation jolted me from sleep, I fought down the guilt induced nausea to wake him. I crawled into his sleeping bag with him every night because I couldn’t handle leaving him alone to deal with the horror on his own. Each night got harder on me, and tears had started threatening to fall the worse it got.
I ran on too little sleep and the constant magical drain, as I worked more magic than I had since my father died. Exhaustion became the excuse I gave myself for continually giving into the comfort I got from the contact of his skin on mine and the feeling of his heart beating under my palm. Honestly, I needed the comfort too. But, honesty with myself or otherwise, had disappeared after the first night we’d had sex. Nope, I lived in denial and told that stupid little voice in my head to eat a fist full of dicks, as Evin would say.
During the day, I checked in on my team to keep track of their progress, and received mostly good news. Then I’d tried to scry for the demoness to check on her location. Scrying essentially a form of magical GPS, but it’s not nearly as accurate and sometimes no matter what you did it wouldn’t work as I’d explained it to Elijah. I found his curiosity about all things magical cute, and found it soothing in a way to teach him.
His interest in magic concerned me. “E, I know all of this is new for you, but I need to know if your curiosity is just that or if you want to learn so you can attempt to use magic?”
“I’m human, I don’t have any magic.” He turned more fully to face me as he spoke. “I can’t use something I don’t have.”
That didn’t reassure me. “That hasn’t stopped humans in the past, we call them warlocks once they gain access to magic.”
“I thought warlock was the name for a male witch.” His puzzled expression almost made me smile, but this conversation was too serious to relax.
“Nope, a witch is a witch, no matter what gender they claim. Warlocks are humans that essentially sell their souls to gain magic from demons and dark deities. All of them are morally bankrupt and enjoy stealing the life force from other people and creatures to prolong their own.”
He lifted his hand up, stopping me. “So they want magic to be immortal?”
I shook my head. “They need to steal the life force of others is because their human bodies aren’t designed to withstand the strain of magic. Overtime, their magic eats them from the inside out. Trust me, if you ever see one, you’ll recognize them for what they are. The closer they are to death, the more they look like living corpses. Think of how Hollywood has depicted ancient vampires drained of all their blood, and that’s pretty close to how they appear.”
“If that’s the case, why on Earth would any human want to have magic? That just seems like a long, slow suicide attempt.” He looked so disgusted and he shuddered the more the thought seemed to sink in.
I shrugged. “I’ve never thought of it that way. But, magic can have a siren call on humans that desire power and control. They want magic to make them powerful and to take the things they want by force. Honestly, I don’t or can’t truly understand their motives because it’s so foreign to me. But I’ve dealt with quite a few over the years in my line of work, and they’re extremely dangerous.”
“I don’t think you have anything to worry about with me and magic, Kainda.” Elijah said from him perch on the other end of the table where he’d watched me earlier. “After Uttu, life is too precious to waste it. Besides, magic isn’t the only way to get by in this world.”
The smirk that pulled at my lips, the closest I’d gotten to a smile since we’d left that motel a few days ago. “Okay then. However, if it's all the same to you, I’ll keep my magic, thank you very much.”
He laughed, and his eyes lit up, making the breath freeze in my lungs. Tartarus be damned, when he did that, butterflies erupted in my stomach and the rest of my body begged for his touch. The unfairness of how attractive he got when he laughed further proved the old adage. Maybe it was so nice to hear and see that side of him after all the shit he’d gone through that I enjoyed. Shaking my head, I had to remind myself he didn’t do that very often and the novelty hadn’t worn off. His hold over me would surely end when his novelty wore off.
Jumping off the table, he got up in my personal space— the jerk— his smile still firmly in place. His hand warm as he cupped the side of my face before pulling me in for a kiss. I shouldn’t let him; I should’ve kneed him right in the groin for his uncalled-for behavior, but I didn’t. And part of me actually wanted him to kiss me, but I’d never admit it to him. Like he could read my mind, he just seemed to do the things I secretly wanted.
My hands fisted in his t-shirt as he tongue probed my mouth when the alarm sounded. We ripped apart and looked to the door, hearts racing. Fuck, he distracted me. I grabbed the mirror laying on the worktable behind me and stroked my thumb over the amethyst set in the metal frame. The surface appeared to ripple, but quickly settled and showed me the clearing in front of the door. Hida and Evin stood there with giant duffle bags of supplies. The former tapped her foot with impatience. She had enough magic that if she truly wanted to, nothing could keep her out. Thankfully, she didn’t like to expend that much effort.
“E, it’s my teammates, take a deep breath for me while I go let them in.” Setting the mirror down, I took another second to watch him until I saw his nostrils flare with his deep inhale. The second the alarm had gone off, a panic attack had sprung up on him.
Going to the door, I grabbed the crystal next to the door that glowed gold. I traced the sigil in reverse and the alarm shut up. Then I repeated the process on the door and whispered the wise word. Pulling it open, I got greeted by their faces of annoyance. Yep, I’d missed this. These cranky assholes were the only family I had, whether I liked it or not. We didn’t always act like it or show it well, but we’d die for one another.
“About fucking time,” Evin said as she grabbed her bag from the ground and stormed past me, making sure to shoulder check me in the process, always warm and cuddly, that one.
I threw up my middle finger behind her back before turning to Hida. She thrust one of the other bags into my chest. I staggered under the sudden weight. “Tartarus be damned, what did you put in here? Cinder blocks?”
“Don’t just keep standing there, move out of the way.” Hida said, holding her own bag with one hand, showing no sign she found it heavy despite the handles looking ready to rip at the seams.
Stepping to the side, I dropped the bag on the floor and let her pass, I reset the alarm and locked the door with magic. Turning around, I found Elijah on the opposite side of the table from Evin who watched him like a bug under a magnifying glass. Hida eyed him as well, and that’s when I noticed his shirt still looked rumpled from the death grip I’d had on the fabric when we’d kissed. Please, Gaia, do not let her fucking start.
“So this is the man that was so special that Uttu didn’t kill him.” Evin said, cocking her head like a curious puppy. “I was expecting someone with a god level hotness, not a kinda sexy nerd.”
My palm met my face before I dragged it downward. “Elijah Henry meet Evin Roth and Hida, my teammates. As you’ve noticed, Evin isn’t exactly house-trained.”
“Bitch,” Evin said, twisting at the waist to blow me a kiss with her middle finger instead of her palm.
Hida shook her head. “Children, the lot of you, and I don’t know why I put up with this insanity.”
Evin went to retort back, but I managed to get my hand over her mouth before she could say something we’d all regret. She was famous for doing that. For my trouble, she licked my fingers. “Eww, that’s nasty!”
Yanking my hand away, she waggled her tongue at me. I wiped her spit on her forehead and shoved her out of the way. She snarled and made a grab for me, but Hida threw up a spell, creating a barrier between the two of us. Evin bounced off the surface and landed on her ass on the dusty floor. Someone hadn’t gotten to kick ass recently and needed an outlet for the rage that burned inside her at all times.
Hida looked at Elijah, who stared at me and Evin like mutants. “I’m dreadfully sorry about these two. We obviously didn’t discipline them enough as children, and they’re more like siblings than teammates, so squabbles crop up frequently. I ignore the bickering until they start to whip out the violence. Then I have to put them in separate corners for a timeout.”
“I don’t exactly have magic to be able to do what you just did to stop them.”
Evin stood, dusting herself off. “Don’t worry about it, you can do what Theron and Delmira used to do. Throw a bucket of water on us. They were humans, and it worked just fine for them.”
I looked at him. “If you value your life, I wouldn’t recommend that course of action.”
“I don’t know, it might be nice to judge a witch wet t-shirt contest.” The smile he gave me too slick, and the heat in his eyes when he looked at me was totally inappropriate.
“You wouldn’t dare.” I said at the same time Evin laughed.
“I like him, Kainda.”