Chapter 6
The next morning I look like shit. There's dark smudges beneath my eyes and they're puffy to boot. I splash cold water on my face until I feel awake and do an extra coat of coverup and mascara. If I look like shit, it's nothing compared to how I feel. I spent all night tossing and turning.
I slept next to the shotgun, but I'd laid it on top of an old swim towel so it wouldn't get gun oil on the pretty comforter I scored at Anthropologie for seventy percent off a few years ago.
Though I know he's still gone, I can't help but poke my head into the mess that is Alex’s apartment before I leave for the day.
I kick a pair of shoes and a piece of the television out of the way and close the door behind me.
For some reason, that door shutting feels final.
I shake off the irrational fear, lock everything up, and head to work.
It's hard to focus on work when someone in your family is missing.
And even though last night I truly was convinced that Alex had gone missing on purpose, as the morning wears on slowly, I start to second-guess myself.
What if those guys were the post-abduction crew?
What if Alex had already been dragged out, kicking and screaming, and those guys were just tossing his house for giggles?
I've never wished I had cameras around my property more than I do today. Several of my coworkers pick up on my weird mood. I smile and tell them I slept poorly. It's the truth, just not the whole truth. Thankfully, Caitlin is off today or she’d see right through my lies.
I check my phone a hundred times, but Alex never texts or calls, and there's no reply to the email I sent him.
I get through the day by telling myself that Alex will be there when I get home. But when I roar up the driveway, it isn't my brother that's there. It's two of the three guys who were here the first time. They're leaning up against the same black SUV, obviously waiting.
I sit there for a second, Goldie idling, deciding whether or not to run.
But in the end, my curiosity wins out. I'm not going to learn anything unless I actually talk to these guys.
So I turn off the car and get out. Probably stupid of me, but I know my brother and I can't imagine anyone he's involved with is all that dangerous.
Still, caution has me stopping several yards away and calling, "Who are you guys?"
"It doesn't matter," the one in the middle says. He exhales a billow of blue-tinged cigarette smoke.
He's the thinnest and the shortest, maybe a couple inches taller than my five seven.
"It matters to me," I say. "You're on my property. You ransacked my brother's house yesterday."
"Where is your brother?" He flicks the cigarette down and stubs it out with the toe of his boot.
"I don't know. Who are you? What do you want?"
"We're your brother's friends. And Alex knows what we want. I'm sure he'll tell you all about it."
"I haven't seen him for a few days. I don't know where he is." My heart is pounding. Up until now, the conversation has seemed tense, but not dangerous. But when I say that I haven't seen him, the guys share a dark, meaningful look.
"Can you please just tell me what's going on?" I nearly beg. "Why are you looking for him? Does he owe you money or something?"
The guy studies me as if trying to figure out if I'm bullshitting him. I wish I were. I wish I knew exactly where Alex was. I'd give anything for that to be true.
"Listen," he says, suddenly much closer than he was before. My worry has distracted me, made me lose sight of the fact that there's two strangers in my front yard. Strangers that efficiently tore up every single one of Alex's belongings only yesterday.
I jerk back, but he grabs my arm, his fingers biting into my wrist. I know I shouldn't try and pull away--he's holding me too tightly for that.
But that irrational, instinctive side can't help it.
It's no use--his fingers just dig in even more painfully.
I press my lips together to suppress my noise of fear.
Something tells me this guy would like that.
"I don't know if you think I'm an idiot, but you better tell Alex that we aren't just going to go away. He knows what he owes us."
"How much is it?" I ask, my voice a high whine; I can't help it--he's really fucking hurting me.
I don't have tons in my savings account, but I do have a 401k through my work. There's a penalty for pulling money out before retirement age, but I'd be willing to do it to get my brother back.
The guy makes a disgusted tsking noise and yanks at my arm. I bite my lower lip, cutting off my cry of pain.
He gets so close to me that I can smell his sickly stale cigarette breath. "You tell Alex that we'll be back. If he doesn't have it for us, we might have to take you as a guarantee that he'll get it to us. And not all of us are gentlemen, like I am."
"All of who?" I can't help but ask. "Who are you? What does he owe you?"
I know my voice sounds like I'm begging. I don't care. I am begging.
"Just tell him." He tosses my arm away; I stumble back and fall on my hip.
"I don't know where he is!" I shakily press myself to my feet and swipe my palms against my scrubs. Some gravel falls, but a throbbing sting in my hands lets me know that some of the rocks are embedded.
The men don't answer me. They just get in the SUV and send rocks spraying behind them as they peel out. I stand there rubbing my arm, looking after them. After a few minutes, I realize that I'm probably in a mild form of shock. Sweat drips down from my hairline. I need to get out of the sun.
I lock the door behind me and take stock of my house. It doesn't look like they came in here. Midnight struts in with her usual greeting, one of my hair ties in her mouth. He scampers off, as if I might muster up the energy to wrestle it away from him.
I stand in my entryway the same way I stood in the driveway--listless and staring without seeing.
I try to remember exactly what the guy said, but the precise words ping-pong around in my head.
The summary is that he thinks I'm in contact with Alex and that they'll hurt me if they don't get what they want.
I don't think it's money, otherwise they would have told me how much he owes them. This is something else.
"Alex, what the fuck did you do?" I finally mumble to myself.