Made To Break (Boys Of Lockridge #1)

Chapter 1

one

Rowyn Hale

Whispers

Stepping off the shuttle bus, I swallow thickly looking up at the tall building. When I applied to Lockridge University I never thought I’d actually be accepted, let alone on scholarship. I guess having no family and no income will get you just that.

Taking a deep breath, I look around and smile. This place is even more breathtaking in person than the pictures I saw on their website.

Climbing up the stairs, I step inside and immediately become overwhelmed with all the bodies moving fast in and out of the building, along with the loud chatter through the halls.

This is going to be a huge adjustment for me, but excitement flows through my veins just like it did the day the acceptance letter arrived.

I screamed in my dingy studio apartment and had to pinch myself to make sure it was real.

The last year has been rough to say the least. My parents died on my seventeenth birthday on their way home with a cake to celebrate.

A drunk driver smashed into them taking their lives along with his.

I try not to think about it because all I’ll do is continue to blame myself for it.

If I ne—my thoughts are cut off when I slam into a hard body.

“Watch it,” he growls, and I look up at him, but his green eyes cut into slits as he stares down at me. I immediately cast mine down and fix my oversized hoodie.

“Sorry,” I whisper, and he laughs.

“You should be. Now, get out of my way, Chunkers!” he spits, and I gasp. What the fuck? I hurriedly step out of his path, only for hands to grip my hips.

“Are you alright, Petal?” a deep voice asks, and I look up at him, swallowing thickly. His blue eyes sparkle with mischief as he smiles down at me.

“I-I’m okay,” I stammer, and he chuckles.

“Might want to pay better attention next time,” another guy whispers as he passes me.

“Don’t pay him any mind. Kade is a prick. So is the other one. I’m Elliot. What’s your name?” he asks, tucking a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. I shiver at his touch and adjust my hoodie, pulling it down over my stomach.

“I’m Rowyn,” I say softly, and he lifts my hand, placing a kiss against my skin. My body litters with goosebumps, and I thank heaven above that I’m wearing a hoodie so I can’t embarrass myself.

“Such a pretty name. See you around, Petal,” he states, releasing my hand, walking around me.

Holy shit. Did that just happen or did I imagine it?

I glance over my shoulder but they’re gone.

Almost as if they were never here to begin with.

I take a deep breath, pulling my suitcase, and walk down the hallway.

I look from room to room hoping to find my dorm but I’m not even sure I’m in the right place.

Reaching into my pocket, I pull out the map that came with my orientation booklet and see I am almost there.

It’s move-in weekend and this place is mobbed with new students and their parents dropping them off.

My heart pings in my chest thinking of what it would’ve been like for my parents to bring me here for my first year of college.

Would they have loved this place as much as I do?

Would they have wanted me to stay home and attend community college?

So many questions I’ll never get answered.

Finally, I make it to my room and see the door is already open. Stepping inside, there’s a girl unpacking her clothes.

“Um, hi. You must be Misti,” I say, and she whips around with a huge smile on her face.

“Oh my god. Are you Rowyn?” She squeals, and I smile.

“Yep. That’s me.”

“You’re so freaking pretty, Jesus.” She laughs, wrapping her arms around me for a hug. I’m not sure what she sees but I’m far from pretty.

“Thank you, and so are you,” I reply, hugging her back.

“I’m so excited to finally meet you. We’re going to have so much fun this year,” she says, and I nod. I’m not used to friends or hugs, or any interaction really, so this is going to be a little bit of an adjustment.

“Same here. I’m guessing this side is mine?” I ask, nodding to the left side of the room with a full size bed and an L-shaped desk.

“Yes, I hope that is okay. I didn’t know when you were arriving. I’m sorry,” she says, and I shake my head.

“No, no. Don’t apologize. I’m good wherever,” I say, wheeling my belongings towards the bed and lifting it onto the mattress.

“The only thing that sucks about being on the freshman floor is the communal bathroom and shower,” she states, rolling her blue eyes.

I laugh and shrug because I’m not sure what else to say.

“When you’re done unpacking, do you want to walk around?

I can give you the scoop on the hierarchy of the school. ” She laughs, and my eyes widen.

“Hierarchy?” I ask, and she grins.

“Get unpacked and I’ll give you the tea. My older sister is a senior here so she told me all the things we need to know as freshmen to survive.”

“Alright, thank god for older sisters, right?” I laugh, tucking a strand of my dark hair behind my ear.

“Yep, Candace is the best,” she says, and I nod, wishing I had someone to rely on but I don’t, so I just unpack my stuff and try to think about the future rather than the past. I need this year to be life changing in the most positive way it can be.

This is the year I persevere and grow into the woman I want to be.

Two hours later we are sitting in Orientation. We both took way too long to get settled and lost track of time. Thankfully, Misti had set an alarm letting us know when it was almost time to be here.

Droves of students pile into the huge auditorium and I just take it all in. It’s a little overwhelming but I take a deep breath and try to center myself when Misti nudges my arm.

“See those guys down there?” she asks, nodding to the three boys sitting next to the podium with letterman jackets on.

“Yeah, they’re hot. Jesus,” I state, and she giggles.

“I know, but if one of them notices you, keep your head down,” she tells me, and my head snaps to her.

“Why? Or better yet—from which one?” I ask, because what the fuck?

“Doesn’t matter, they talk. Look at the one with dark hair, that’s Grayson Mercer, football captain.

He rules the school. Anything he says goes.

The other one with the broody face—that’s Elliot Jacobs, baseball pitcher.

He’s nice but don’t let his charm fool you.

” She laughs as I look down at the three.

“And the last one?” I ask.

“That’s Kade Langley, hockey captain, and the scariest of them all. I can’t stand him.”

“They seem pretty harmless from up here. Have you had a run in with them?” I ask, but she shakes her head. I don’t want to tell her that I already have. We’ve only just met and I don’t know her well enough to tell her my secrets.

“Not exactly but I’ve heard stories,” she whispers, and I lean in because I’ve got to know.

I’m too nosey not to know what these stories are.

“Ok, so rumor has it, years ago a girl tried to report a Lockridge captain and the report disappeared, the girl transferred mid-semester, which is something unheard of, and the captain went pro. Apparently, the problem was handled internally,” she states, air quoting internally, and my eyes widen.

“So the jocks get away with what they want?”

“Yep, this is an athletes first university. They have generous donors, national titles, and alumni in high places. The teams are everything to this university. Do our grades and tuition matter? Of course they do. But them,” she nods down to the three boys, “They matter more. So…” She trails off as I stare at the three gods.

“Stay away from them and don’t get on their radar,” she warns as Elliot’s eyes lock with mine.

I gasp when he smirks and immediately look anywhere else as my cheeks redden for getting caught.

“Anything else I need to know about them?” I ask, and she giggles.

“Last thing, and the most important of all…” She trails off again, distracted by more people coming to sit around us, so I nudge her and she looks at me.

“Oh right, sorry. I’m easily distracted.

Okay, so each year the senior captains choose someone to test the system, whatever the hell that means.

But they don’t do it together, and if the person they choose breaks quietly, then Lockridge knows the balance of power still holds. ”

“Well that is a little crazy. How would we know if we are chosen? Not that I want to be, but what do I need to look out for?” I ask, but she shrugs.

“Candace told me you never know if you are chosen. We never really know the underlying meaning of it all because we know our place here. All the jocks are dicks, so there’s no way of knowing,” she says, and I nod as the headmaster taps the mic, silencing the auditorium.

I sit in my seat trying hard to pay attention to what is being said; however, I can’t help but look at the boys sitting there talking amongst themselves.

I don’t know why I’m so drawn to them but I can’t seem to look away.

All the information Misti spilled intrigues me.

I want to know more, but at the same time, I’m afraid, because why would any of them speak to me?

I’m a big girl with rolls. They can have any girl they want.

Me though? I would repulse them because of my size.

Why would guys like that want to come near an ugly, fat duckling like me?

They wouldn’t. Not ever. Boys never bothered with me, and the ones that did were drunk at parties.

Once they got in my pants, they would make fun of me the next day or act like it never happened to begin with.

I guess that’s what happens when a girl says no to sex.

It had gotten so bad that I started cutting myself to relieve the pain.

Boys would use me, and all I wanted was to be loved which got me nowhere.

Hence why I never gave it up to any of them.

I was so naive and believed everything they would say to me just for them to lie and accuse me of making it up, because again, why would they want a fat, ugly girl like me?

It hurts—it hurts so god damn bad that I have no one to want me, love me, or just be there for me.

I’m all alone but attending Lockridge University—it’s my new beginning. No more being afraid.

The old Rowyn is gone. It’s time for the new Rowyn Hale to spread her wings and fly.