Chapter 13
Lucy silenced the engine and the girls climbed out of the car. It was the day after Elizabeth’s funeral. Madeleine had been released from hospital, and her daughters had brought her back to the cottage to recuperate.
‘Easy now, Mum,’ Faith instructed as she opened the passenger door and helped her to get out of the car. Madeleine was still trying to get used to using crutches.
Her arms already ached after hobbling the short distance from the car to the cottage. How on earth was she going to survive on crutches for the next few weeks?
Lucy put her key in the lock and they went inside. The emptiness, the lack of Elizabeth’s presence, hit them hard. The house seemed so different without her waiting to welcome them home. They made their way to the kitchen, where the Aga had kept the room cosy and inviting.
‘I know what Nanna would do right now,’ Faith said, clapping her hands. ‘She’d put the kettle on and make a nice cuppa, so why don’t I make us a pot of tea?’
Lucy smiled. ‘That would be lovely, thanks, sis.’
Madeleine went to sit down at the table but found the movement awkward with the crutches. ‘Damn things,’ she complained.
After a bit of faffing around, Lucy came to her aid and guided her into a chair. Maybe the girls were right. If she couldn’t even sit down at the table without help, how on earth would she take care of herself alone in her house in Dublin?
Lucy pulled out a chair and sat opposite her while Faith filled the kettle from the tap then put it on the Aga to boil.
When the tea was made, Faith placed the pot in the centre of the table and covered it with Elizabeth’s hand-knitted tea cosy. She poured three mugs and passed them out. Madeleine clasped the mug between her hands. She preferred coffee, but she was grateful for its warmth all the same.
She felt uneasy sitting here drinking tea; she didn’t enjoy lounging around doing nothing. She always liked to be busy. At home, if she wasn’t working, she’d start cleaning or go for a walk or do something. She was always active and never liked to sit still.
‘So, girls, what are your plans?’ she began tentatively.
The girls looked at one another blankly. ‘Plans?’ Lucy asked in confusion.
‘Well, now that the funeral is over…’ she began. ‘Don’t you both need to get back to work?’
‘Well, I’m using up some leave I’m owed,’ Lucy began, ‘but when that runs out, I’ll be working remotely. My boss has been great – said I could take as long as I need.’
Madeleine pursed her lips together distastefully.
She wasn’t a fan of remote working; too many people clocked off early or worse, were watching TV when they should be doing work.
When people worked from home, there was no collaboration.
Not to mention the impact on office culture – people didn’t know how to communicate face to face with one another any more.
All the younger crew in her agency wanted to work from home, complaining about long commute times and work–life balance.
In her day work was work, but this younger generation was so much softer.
Did they think work was supposed to a holiday camp?
Then reality smacked into her. That wasn’t her concern any more.
Madeleine turned to Faith. ‘Well, what about you? Surely you need to go back to your job?’ Last she knew, Faith was working as an administration assistant in a food manufacturing company.
Madeleine had lost track of how many jobs her free-spirited daughter had had over the past few years.
She had tried various admin roles; she had been a Special Needs Assistant – Madeleine had thought she might stick with that as she seemed to enjoy the job, but then she had left and started working in a mobile phone shop.
Her daughter never seemed to stay long in one place, no matter how many times Madeleine had advised her that employers didn’t look favourably on job-hopping.
Faith shook her head and wouldn’t meet her gaze.
‘Are you working remotely too?’ Madeleine probed. Judging from the expression on Faith’s face, there was something her daughter wasn’t telling her.
Faith shook her head again. ‘I quit my job to take care of Nanna.’ She whispered it so quietly that it took Madeleine a minute to work out what she had said.
Madeleine was incredulous. ‘You did what?’
Faith gulped before continuing. ‘I handed in my notice three months ago when we knew Elizabeth was very ill and I wanted to care for her. I hated the place anyway.’
‘I thought you were working remotely! You mean to tell me you’ve had no job for the past three months?’
Faith nodded. ‘I’m sure I’ll pick something up soon.’
‘Darling, why didn’t you tell me?’ Madeleine was shocked.
Faith shrugged. ‘I don’t know. It’s not that a big a deal.’
‘You’ve been unemployed for the last three months with no other source of income. I think that is a very big deal. You should have told me. Your whole career trajectory could be ruined by this break.’
‘Well, maybe I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d react like this,’ Faith replied churlishly.
Stay calm. Breathe, Madeleine told herself.
‘Have you revised your CV? Have you had a look at who’s hiring? The job market is tough out there right now – you need to really focus all your time and energy on it.’
‘We’ve just buried Nanna, Mum!’ Faith cried. ‘I will do it when I’m ready. There’s no rush.’
‘But financially how are you managing?’
‘I have some savings.’
‘You don’t want to eat into savings. Savings are a nest egg for a rainy day. You need to get an income urgently. And it’s not just about earnings – what about your other benefits, like healthcare or your pension?’
Faith shrugged. ‘I didn’t have either anyway. I can’t miss what I never had.’
Madeleine placed a hand to her head, stricken.
‘Oh, my goodness. If there was one thing I thought I’d drilled into you girls, it’s the importance of financial security.
You need to start thinking about what you’re going to do with your life.
You’ve no financial independence. You need to consider a career change.
You’re too passive, coasting along seeing where life takes you – you need to be proactive. ’
‘Not everyone wants to climb the corporate ladder! Relax, Mum, you sound more stressed than me. I’m not worried, so you shouldn’t be either.’
‘Well, how will you ever be financially secure or get a mortgage unless you have a solid income?’
‘I don’t mind renting. I don’t think I’d like the pressure of having a mortgage hanging over my head.’
‘Come on, Faith. I’ve been around long enough to know that life can change in an instant. It’s peace of mind to have your own home and a steady job with regular income. Financial security is one of the best things you can do for your future self.’
Faith bristled. ‘Stop trying to fix me, Mum! I’m not broken. I’m happy with my life just as it is.’
‘Well, if you ask me, you’re throwing your life away.’
‘Nobody asked you!’ Faith snapped.
‘But your savings won’t last forever,’ Madeleine protested. ‘You’ll have no buffer if something goes wrong, and how are you going to explain the gap in your CV to your next employer? Oh yeah, I took a few months off because I fancied it…’
‘I’ll tell them I took a few months off to care for my dying grandmother,’ Faith interjected.
‘I think many employers would look at that as a positive quality in a prospective job applicant,’ Lucy backed up her sister.
Madeleine shook her head despairingly. ‘If I had known you had quit your job to take care of Elizabeth, I would never have allowed you do it.’
Faith laughed. ‘I’m a grown woman – you don’t get a say, unfortunately. Besides, I have no regrets. I got to spend precious time with my grandmother; no job or money could ever make up for that.’
Madeleine turned back to Lucy then, trying a different tack. ‘And what about you? Don’t you need to get home to Kyle?’
Kyle had been notably absent over the last few days. Madeleine had expected him to come to the funeral but there had been no sign of him, and now it seemed that Lucy wasn’t in any hurry to get back to Dublin to see him either.
Lucy’s gaze darted to the floor and her cheeks reddened. ‘H-he’s at home. He c-couldn’t get the time off work,’ she stammered.
Madeleine’s suspicions were confirmed. She didn’t want to pry but there was something up with those two, she was sure of it. Perhaps she was reading too much into it, but she prided herself on her intuition. She glanced at Faith, who looked equally uncomfortable, so she dropped the subject.
‘So, neither of you is planning on returning to Dublin in the foreseeable future?’ Madeleine repeated despondently.
They shook their heads.
‘Well, do you think one of you could drive me back to Dublin?’ she chanced.
The girls looked at her in disbelief.
She sighed. ‘Fine, I’ll get a taxi.’
‘It’s not that we wouldn’t drive you home, Mum, but you live by yourself,’ Faith explained. ‘How will you manage the stairs and getting groceries?’
‘Well… I-I mean … I could…’ Madeleine scrambled for an answer.
‘No, Mum, it would never work. You’ll have to stay here with us until you’re back on your feet again,’ Lucy said.
Madeleine sagged in defeat, knowing that they were right.
She was all out of options. She was stuck in Inishbeg Cove for the foreseeable future.
She had no job. Nothing to do to pass the time.
She couldn’t even do something as simple as go for a walk.
She was stuck inside the four walls of Elizabeth’s cottage. She felt panicked at the thought.
Madeleine never stopped. She never came up for air.
Ever since her husband had died, she had worked and worked without ever raising her head to look up.
Now she had nothing to do or nowhere to be and she was lost. Without her job, she was no one.
She had no purpose. Her work was her entire identity.