25. June 2024
25
June 2024
T he scrambled eggs sat cold on Willow’s plate and the fork unused beside it. She needed to eat if she was to get through the long day ahead, but her appetite had abandoned her. Glancing at the mirror on the wall, she flinched at her own reflection. The dark circles under her eyes were becoming a regular feature, and her skin seemed to have permanently lost its glow.
So much for bringing grace and beauty to life.
A knock at the door had Willow climbing off the stool and going to open it. Lili stood there with a foil-covered plate, beaming with energy.
‘Good morning, my little swan,’ she chirped as she pushed her way inside. ‘I brought your favourite—sesame pancakes. If that smell doesn’t make you hungry, then you’re a lost cause. ?yí made them especially for you.’ Her gaze settled on the plate of cold eggs sitting on the bench as she handed Willow the pancakes. She silently went to bin them.
Willow peeled the foil back, and her stomach growled involuntarily. She plucked one of the pancakes off the plate and ate it on her way back to the bench. Lili sat on one of the stools and pulled the other one out for Willow.
‘You can’t keep going like this,’ Lili said, watching her carefully. ‘Your body needs proper fuel and movement.’
Pure facts.
‘So you’re coming jogging with me this morning,’ Lili announced. ‘No excuses.’
Willow set the plate down with a heavy breath. ‘I should save my energy for rehearsals today.’ She had a drink of water to help get the pancakes down.
‘You can do both.’ Lili sounded determined. ‘Trust me, the fresh air alone will do wonders for you. Think of all those endorphins.’
‘It’s freezing out.’
‘Oh stop.’
Willow watched Lili eat a pancake, thinking of all the ways she’d been there for her through the previous year. So many bouts of homesickness and endless moments of self-doubt. ‘Okay.’
Lili appeared surprised. ‘Okay?’
‘Since I can’t think straight right now, I’ll let you decide what’s best. If you think I should jog, then I’ll jog.’
Lili pulled her into a hug and held her there. ‘I’m sorry it hurts, but it won’t hurt forever.’
It was incomprehensible that it hurt as much as it did. How could one’s entire soul be consumed in a matter of weeks? They hadn’t even had a chance to fall in love properly before it was over.
Liar .
She had loved him too soon, too fast, too… much.
‘Eat up,’ Lili said, releasing her. She picked up two pancakes and handed one to Willow. ‘Cheers.’
Willow bumped her pancake to Lili’s, then ate, helping it down with more water.
When they were done eating, Willow went to change, returning in her running gear.
‘Ready?’ Lili asked mid-stretch.
Willow nodded. ‘Ready.’
They set off at a slow pace, side by side, beneath a pink sky. The icy June air hit Willow hard. Her body felt clumsy, every step requiring twice the effort it normally did. Despite this, the rhythmic sound of their feet on the footpath was oddly soothing and brought reprieve from her thoughts.
‘I already have a stitch,’ Willow said, slowing a little.
‘Better than the other pain,’ Lili replied, slightly puffed. ‘Don’t you think?’
Willow allowed herself a smile. ‘True.’
As they rounded the corner onto Park Street, Willow glanced in the direction of the coffee shop across the road, and her feet stopped. As if her thoughts had somehow conjured him, there was Vaughn Gallo. He had a coffee in one hand and his phone in the other as he paced the length of his car in his navy suit. She stood there drinking him in like a true addict.
Realising Willow was no longer with her, Lili turned around, jogging on the spot. ‘What’s wrong? Your stitch get worse?’
So much worse. Now she could add a pounding heart, burning eyes, and paralysis to her list of symptoms.
Lili followed Willow’s line of sight to the black Mercedes parked across the street. Finn was now holding the car door open, waiting patiently for Vaughn to finish on the phone.
‘Argh.’ Lili jogged back to Willow. ‘Come on. Let’s go before he sees you.’
Too late. Vaughn looked in her direction, and their gazes locked. He still had the phone to his ear, but he was no longer talking. A breathless few seconds passed as they stared at each other, frozen in the moment. Memories stirred. Shared glances, words spoken, the faint scent of cigarettes left on her skin after he’d kissed every inch of her. The sudden urge to smell him one more time was a little much.
He was the first to look away. Ending the call, he ducked into the car without so much as another glance in her direction. Finn walked around to the driver’s side and climbed in, and then a moment later, the car joined the flow of traffic. Willow stood there like an idiot, staring after the car until it was gone from sight.
‘That was painful to watch,’ Lili said.
Drawing a breath, Willow looked at her. ‘Sorry. I wasn’t ready to see him.’
Lili held on to her hips and looked around. ‘Should we keep going, or do you want to head home?’ She was trying to gauge Willow’s emotional state.
If Vaughn was making an effort to move on, it was time for Willow to do the same. A proper effort this time.
She swallowed down the hurt lodged in her throat. ‘I’m fine. Let’s keep going.’
Lili’s eyebrows rose. ‘Really?’
Willow broke into a slow jog. ‘Really.’
Lili took a moment to process the shift, then jogged up beside her.
Willow concentrated on the steady rise and fall of her breaths and the rhythm of feet once again. Focusing on the physical was the only way she could escape the emotional.
When they reached the next corner, she glanced over her shoulder at the empty space where Vaughn’s Mercedes had been, then continued running.