12. Chapter Twelve
Chapter Twelve
Marc
T he hotel room closed in on me as my eyes locked onto Ken’s phone screen. The PayPal notification glared back, searing its words into my brain.
PrivatelyYours Invoice 00254-Magic Marco_Premium membership has posted.
Ken stood frozen, a towel draped around his hips. Water droplets glistened on his chest, his face pale as a ghost. “Marc, I—”
“Explain this,” I demanded quietly, holding up his phone. My voice barely rose above a whisper. The man who had been so kind and patient with my daughter, the man who made me feel like love was possible—had kept such a secret from me.
Why would he do this?
“You knew?” I staggered, the wind knocked out of me. “You watched all those videos?”
Ken stepped closer, his features etched with desperation. “Yes, I knew. I—it was before Mia enrolled. I recognized you that day.” He hung his head. “I knew who you were.”
My shoulders sagged under the weight of realization. “All this time, and you didn’t say anything.”
He took a step forward. Grief clouded his eyes when I stepped back. “I never meant to hurt you,” Ken said. “Getting to know you changed everything.”
“Really?” I scoffed, filled with a sense of betrayal. Ken had been watching my online performances, paying for my content, and fantasizing about me long before we met in person. He’d kept all of this a secret from me throughout our entire relationship.
Christ… I never imagined that sweet guy might be one of those faceless men online.
The knowledge left a bitter taste in my mouth. I needed to get out of here.
“Believe me, Marc, I care about the real you.” Ken’s voice grew more fervent, his eyes glistening and brimming with desperation. “Not just the guy I used to watch on my computer screen. You’re so much more than that.”
“Then why didn’t you tell me?” I demanded, fists clenched at my sides. “Why did you keep this hidden?”
Ken reached out, his fingers grazing my arm. “What I feel for you goes beyond anything I ever experienced watching you on a screen. It’s deeper than that. It’s real. You know this is the real thing, don’t you?”
But I pulled away, torn between belief and the fear of being played for a fool. “I don’t know what to think anymore. I thought we had something, but now…” Images from my past flashed through my mind—me naked and dancing, touching myself, spreading my ass cheeks—every inch of me exposed for paying strangers behind screens.
But one of them had been Ken.
Someone I was developing genuine feelings for had seen me like that—and now all I felt was shame.
“We do have something special.” Ken’s voice cracked with emotion. “Please, listen to me. It was never my intent to deceive you. I was afraid of losing you if you found out I was a fan first.”
Blinking fast, I struggled to reconcile what I had heard. The man I had grown to care for stood before me, pleading for understanding. But the trust between us was gone.
As much as I wanted to believe him, the pain was too raw, too fresh. All I saw was the secret he had kept from me.
I wondered what else he might be hiding.
Was Ken truly interested in me as a person, or was he just living out some sick fantasy with the man he’d been watching online?
The room felt suffocating. “I need to get out.” I grabbed my suitcase and yanked the phone charger from the wall.
Ken’s expression twisted, a tumult of confusion and fear. “What are you doing?”
“I can’t do this right now. I have to go,” I replied, barely able to meet his gaze. “We’re done. I don’t want to see you again.”
Ken’s face crumpled. “Don’t say that.”
“No!” I shouted, cutting him off as I opened the door. “Just… leave me alone.”
I raced down the hallway toward the elevators, half-expecting Ken to follow, to plead his case.
But he didn’t.
The elevator doors slid open with a ding. I stepped inside, my fingers hesitating as they hovered over the button panel before finally pressing the lobby button. As the elevator descended, confusion and betrayal swirled inside. How could I have been so blind? The man I had let into my life, into Mia’s life , had been keeping secrets from the very beginning.
The lobby was quiet as I waited for my truck. Thoughts raced, replaying every moment of our relationship, searching for any hint that Ken was anything other than genuine. But all I saw was his warm smile, the way his eyes sparkled when he laughed, the gentle touch of his hand on mine.
How much was truth and how much was him wanting to be with his fantasy man? Did he give a fuck about Marc Mendez, the man?
What if it was all a ploy to say that he fucked Magic Marco, laughing with his friends, bragging how he’d tasted the goods?
“Your truck is ready, sir,” the valet announced, snapping me out of my reverie.
“Thank you,” I muttered, barely able to get the words out as I climbed into the driver’s seat.
As soon as I started driving, the weight of my decision hit me. Leaving Ken behind was a dick move. I shouldn’t have done that, but I couldn’t face him, not now. The night’s magic was overshadowed by his lies.
Betrayal and humiliation surged within me, twisting my thoughts. Was his kindness and patience all an elaborate act? Had he ever truly cared about me, or had it all been a game to him?
Ken had many opportunities to be honest with me about his knowledge of my past, but he kept it hidden, to keep it all a secret.
I reached for my phone, my fingers trembling as I found Alonso’s number. He picked up on the second ring. “Hey, Marc. How’s the big city?”
I swallowed hard, trying to keep my voice steady. “Change of plans, brother. I’m on my way home early. Can you get Mia ready?”
There was a pause, a moment of heavy silence. “Is everything okay? You sound upset.”
My throat tightened. “It’s a long story, Alonso. I … I can’t talk about it right now.”
“Alright, man,” Alonso said, his tone gentle yet firm. “Just drive safe, okay? We’ll see you soon.”
I nodded, forgetting for a moment that he couldn’t see me. “Thanks. I’ll be there soon.” I drove the rest of the way in silence, trying to forget that just a few hours ago, I’d been the happiest man in the world.
***
Alonso opened the door before I could knock, his face etched with concern. “Hey, bro.”
“Hey. Where’s Mia?” I asked, my gaze drifting around the cozy living room.
“Out at a movie with Elena and the boys,” Alonso replied, leading me into his house. “I didn’t want her to be around if you weren’t in the right mood.”
I sighed. Yeah, Alonso was always the smart one. “Thanks,” I murmured. We made our way to the kitchen, and the scent of freshly brewed coffee filled the air. Alonso handed me a steaming mug. “Do you want to talk about it?”
I wrapped my hands around the mug, the heat seeping into my skin as I sat down at the kitchen table. “I don’t even know where to start,” I muttered.
“Start at the beginning.” Alonso sat across from me, his eyes filled with understanding and support. “Take your time.”
So I did.
I shared everything—my financial struggles after Jacob left, the PrivatelyYours account, meeting Ken, and how he had made me feel… until today. I spoke until my voice was raw with emotion.
Alonso leaned back, contemplating. “I had no idea things had gotten that bad for you. I wish I’d been able to help more.”
“I did what I needed to do,” I answered, my pride not allowing me to accept his sympathy for my situation. “You did enough, brother.”
He reached over and clapped my shoulder. “Okay, so—Ken. You have every right to be mad at him for not telling you that he knew your secret. But is this a dealbreaker? Is it enough to end things between you two?”
I snorted. “I thought so an hour ago when I left him in the hotel room.”
“That’s fair.” Alonso paused a beat, then asked, “What are you mad at? That your boyfriend is the kind of guy that pays to watch porn, or that he didn’t tell you that he’d seen you on that site?”
My head snapped up at that question. Then I sighed, staring at my coffee. “I don’t care if he wants to watch porn or people on PrivatelyYours.” Yeah, sometimes I mentally disparaged those guys that paid to see me. I should have been more grateful since they were paying my bills.
Maybe on some level it did sting to know that Ken was one of those guys, but in the end if that’s what he wanted to spend his money on, that was his decision.
So, what was it that I was upset about? “It’s not about him knowing about Magic Marco. It’s about the choice he made to keep that knowledge from me, even as we got closer.”
That choice made me question everything we had built together, everything he’d told me.
Alonso sighed. “It’s not easy. But people make mistakes. They keep secrets out of fear or uncertainty. It doesn’t always mean their feelings aren’t real.”
I mulled over his words, the conflict raging within me as I ran a hand through my hair, my mind swirling in chaos. “I can’t even think straight right now.”
Alonso nodded. “Listen, Mia is having a great time with us this weekend. Why don’t you go home. Take some time for yourself, rest, and try to sort through everything that happened? We’ll drop Mia off in the morning, give you the space you need.”
I sighed, rubbing my temples as the weight of exhaustion pressed down on me. A good night’s sleep and some time to think—and cry—in the privacy of my home would help me decide what to do next. “Yeah, you’re right. Thanks, brother.”
“Of course,” he replied, touching my shoulder. “You know I’m always here for you.”
***
The silence of the house without Mia to distract me just made the voices in my head even louder. I needed fresh air, so I went to the backyard.
I weeded and pruned my garden, doing my best to stay distracted. But my thoughts kept returning to Ken. Hurt and betrayal from Ken’s secret gnawed at me relentlessly.
But then, all of a sudden, I’d remember his kind patience with Mia, his gentle touch with me. The way it felt to hold him in my arms.
Was I throwing away a chance at happiness because of my fear and pride? Because he hurt my feelings by not being honest with me?
What would I have done if he had come to me with the truth early in our friendship? I couldn’t even imagine the embarrassment that I’d have knowing her teacher masturbated to videos of me.
Fuck, I’d probably have pulled Mia from school and left town that day.
I had just put away the garden hose and was heading inside when my phone buzzed in my pocket, interrupting my thoughts. It was Elena, her voice tinged with concern. “Hey Marc.
I straightened. “Is Mia okay?” I asked, worried.
“She’s fine,” Elena assured me, then continued. “Marc, do you have Facebook?”
“No, never got an account,” I replied, wiping my dirt-streaked hands on my jeans. “I hate that stuff, you know that.”
She let out a long sigh. “Something happened, and you need to see this. I’m sending you some screenshots.”
A few seconds later, my phone buzzed with incoming messages, and I opened them with a sense of unease. The first image was a Facebook post on the elementary school parents’ page, and my heart sank as the screenshots Elena sent turned my blood to ice.
An anonymous parent posted:
“BEWARE: The father of one of the kindergarten students used to dance NAKED online for money. Is this the kind of person we want around our innocent children? He goes by ‘Magic Marco.’ Disgusting! The school needs to do something about this immediately. Our kids aren’t safe!”
Nausea churned in my gut as I scanned the blurred images from my account and malicious comments, each word a heavy blow.
“OMG, that’s so inappropriate! Who is it?”
“The school better take action.”
Fuck. Everything I had worked so hard to build for Mia and me was crumbling around me.
“Marc, are you still there?” Elena asked quietly.
I put the phone on speaker so we could talk while I looked at these. “Yeah. I’m here. Who did this?”
“Not sure,” she said gently. “But this is serious. You need to get ahead of it.”
Fear and anger raged through me. Who did this? For a moment, Ken’s face came to mind. Was this his way of getting back at me for leaving him at the hotel and ending our relationship?
I didn’t think so. Even if he was hurt, he wouldn’t harm Mia.
But if it wasn’t Ken, that meant someone else in town knew about Magic Marco. Yes, those videos were public, for a price, and meant for an audience, but I’d never expected to find my subscribers in this sleepy little conservative town.
That’s before I found out about Ken.
So much for what I knew.
Mia. The realization hit me hard. She was going to find out about these videos. The thought of her facing cruelty or embarrassment because of my decisions overwhelmed me.
In that instant, my past choices crashed down on me like an avalanche.
How could I ever make this right?