Chapter 19
NINETEEN
Hartford
Paxton’s eyes search mine as he waits for my answer.
What am I doing? This is Paxton. I wasn’t lying when I said that was the best orgasm I’ve ever had, because it definitely was, but it was more than that.
After he finished and our eyes crashed into each other, something changed.
My heart exploded and built back bigger and better.
With enough room for him to take charge of my heart. He owns it now.
I want to have sex with him. More than anything. But I don’t want to do it here with an audience.
“Uncuff me, Sir,” I say, wanting a moment to think.
He unlocks the handcuffs immediately, and I rub my wrists as soon as I’m free.
“Are you okay?” he asks. He carefully examines me and brings my wrist to his lips to press a soft kiss on the faint red mark. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
I shake my head. “Not at all.” I cup his face in my hands. “Take me back to your place and fuck me,” I say, and then add on, “Sir.”
To hell with the rules.
His expression darkens, and he grabs my hand, helping me from the chair. We leave the club in a flash, and I’ve never seen Paxton move so quickly. Hopefully, it’s not a preview of what’s coming.
I giggle as he starts the engine of his Jeep.
“What’s so funny?”
I shake my head as he pulls out of the valet area. “I’ve never seen you move so fast.”
He reaches over and squeezes my thigh. “I’ve never wanted anyone as much as I want you, Hartford.”
My chest constricts and warms at his words. “Me either.”
We drive in comfortable silence as Paxton maneuvers us onto the interstate. But the high from the club disintegrates, and reality comes crashing back to the surface.
Sex is a big deal. It will venture into a territory from which there is no coming back. I don’t know if our friendship can survive something like that.
“You look like you might explode from thinking too much.” Paxton’s voice reverberates throughout the cab of his Jeep.
I chew on the bottom of my lip before I put my jumbled thoughts out into the world. “I’m just wondering if we might have—”
He cuts in, “Moved too fast. We have broken every rule, except one. Maybe we shouldn’t break it. Is that what you’re thinking?”
“You’re not mad, are you?”
Paxton grasps my hand. “Hartford, I could never be mad at you. Our friendship is the most important thing in the world to me.”
“I feel the same. I just don’t want anything to…” My words fall away.
“I know,” he says, bringing my hand to his lips. He kisses my knuckles before returning my hand to my lap.
He moves both hands to the steering wheel and focuses on the road. Once again, silence falls over us. This time, it’s not so comfortable. It leaves me with a horrible feeling. I want Paxton more than anything, but I can’t bear the thought of jeopardizing our friendship.
We arrive at his place and head inside. We’re both silent as we change clothes and get ready for bed.
“Just sleep in the bed with me,” I tell him when he takes a pillow from the bed.
“You sure?”
I nod. “Yes.” I want to feel close to him. After what happened tonight, I need to lie with him. Or maybe I need him to lie with me. Let me know we didn’t ruin anything.
He removes his T-shirt, leaving on his gray sweatpants. They ride low on his lean hips, and I can see the enormous outline of his dick through the cotton material. Now I’m turned on.
His green gaze travels over my sleep shorts and white tank top, and it takes all my willpower to climb into the bed instead of begging him to have sex with me.
The cool sheets are a balm to my overheated skin as I slide under the comforter.
My body is still buzzing with the energy from the club tonight, and I wonder if Paxton feels the same.
He climbs into bed and lies on his side to face me. “Did you see that one dude at the club?”
I face him, mimicking his position. “The guy with the purple hair and purple tuxedo?”
Paxton laughs, and the sound of it vibrates through my body. “Yeah, wonder what his deal was.”
“He looked like a pimp straight from the 90s.” I giggle into my pillow. “I kept thinking he should have the platform shoes.”
“Yeah, with the goldfish swimming in the bottom.”
We’re both hysterical now.
“Could you imagine?”
Our laughter dies out, and we’re left staring at each other. A small part of me wishes Paxton would talk to me like he did at the club. Okay, a big part of me wants that.
He tenderly sweeps a piece of my hair from my face and secures it behind my ear. “I can’t get over how pretty you are, Hartford. The other girls in high school must have been so jealous.”
“They were jealous because they wanted to hang out with you.”
He shakes his head slightly, propping up on his elbow as he looms over me. “No, they were jealous of how beautiful you are, because you are the prettiest fucking woman I’ve ever met.”
My cheeks heat as he moves closer. I swear he’s going to kiss me, and I want it so badly that I nearly say a quick prayer to whoever may be lurking above to let it happen. “I don’t think that’s true,” I whisper.
He lets out a low chuckle, but there’s no humor behind it. “It’s the most honest thing I’ve ever said. I’ve always thought you were pretty. And also badass.”
“Really?”
He blushes. “Well, yeah, you’re one of the most important people to me.”
“You’re the most important person to me too,” I breathe out.
He leans in and captures my mouth with his, and I could get drunk off Paxton’s kisses. I feel tipsy as he pulls away to say, “I can’t stop thinking about what happened at the club, and how badly I want more.”
More.
I want it too, and I make a silent wish that whatever happens between us doesn’t ruin anything. “I want more too.”
“No more thinking,” he says before kissing me again. He deepens the kiss and glides his hand under my shirt. “Your little outfit is driving me crazy.”
I feel the same about his gray sweatpants. All I want to do is rip them off his body. Instead, I roam my fingertips over the heated skin of his back, letting my nails rake up and down. Then I head under the waistband of his sweatpants, feeling his firm ass beneath my palms.
I can feel his erection through the thin material of my shorts.
He grinds into me with a growl, and I meet his thrusts. “Too many clothes,” he grumbles as he fights to get my shirt off.
We stop long enough to remove our clothes, and he fumbles with the nightstand, lying half across me, opening the drawer and swearing under his breath.
I prop up on my elbows. “What are you looking for?”
“I know I’ve got a condom in this drawer somewhere. It’s old as hell.”
“I’m on birth control injections.”
He stops moving and twists his body to look back at me. “What are you saying?”
I give him a small smile. “If there’s anybody I trust in this world, it’s you.”
“I’m clean. I swear.”
I nod. “I know.”
“Fuck, Hart,” he hisses before his lips find mine again. He lowers me back down, covering me with his body as he kisses the heck out of me.
It’s another life-changing kiss. One I’ll never forget.
I wrap my legs around his waist as his body hovers above me. He hikes my leg higher, digging his fingers into the flesh of my ass. He peppers kisses along my neck, jaw, and down the column of my throat, making my body come alive with desire.
A white-hot heat flashes behind my eyelids as he brings his dick to my entrance.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” he whispers, and my mind decides to hold on to that nugget of information for later. To dissect every syllable.
He pushes inside me, and my toes curl.
“Oh, Pax,” I moan out, my body acclimating to his size. “I’ve never been with anyone so big. Go slow,” I tell him, gazing into his soft-green eyes.
“Hartford, I don’t know if I can.” He pushes in deeper, his face looking like he’s in actual pain. “I’m so turned on. All I want to do is fuck you into this mattress, but I’ll go slow for you.”
I touch his face with my hand, grazing my fingers over the scruff on his chin. “You’re just so big.”
A small smile graces his lips. “Keep saying shit like that and I’m gonna fucking pound my cock so hard inside you that you won’t be able to walk tomorrow.”
Oh my.
I arch my back, letting him slide further inside me. “Take me however you want me.”
He smooths a hand over my hair as he gazes into my eyes and we breathe in each other’s air. “I won’t hurt you, Hart,” he murmurs, pumping his dick slowly in and out of me. “I won’t hurt you,” he repeats and my heart nearly melts.
And maybe I’m wishing for more than I can ever have, but I hope that he never does hurt me. That we don’t end before we’ve ever even begun.
“I know you won’t,” I tell him. “I trust you.”
He picks up his pace, slowly at first, but gaining momentum with each additional thrust. “God, you feel so fucking good.” He groans as I place kisses on his throat.
My body builds toward its release, and Paxton repositions himself to where his pubic bone rubs against my clit with each thrust of his hips. The motion causes my body to nearly buck off the bed.
“Oh god, Paxton…” My body spirals with lust, and I grip him tightly, so I don’t lose control.
“That’s it, baby. Take my cock nice and deep. Nobody’s ever fucked you this deep before, huh?”
I shake my head, squeezing my eyes shut. “No,” I call out. “Never.”
He rams deeper. “Good. No one’s ever fucked you this good, huh?”
“No,” I whisper.
And no one ever will. This is ruining me. I’ve never had anything this good.
My orgasm starts slowly, building toward the sky as bright lights dance across my vision.
My body hums, every cell vibrating as he keeps pumping into me.
Over and over. My heart pounds. My skin shivers.
So many things are happening all at once that I can’t focus on any one sensation.
It’s too much, but not enough. I cling to Paxton, not wanting to let him go.
“I’m so close,” he growls out. And I’m right there with him.
I think my body lifts off first, but Paxton quickly catches up and we ride out the waves of our orgasm together. It continues on and on, and I can’t stop coming.
“Paxton,” I call out at the height of it all, my body tumbling and crashing.
He answers in a string of curse words, his body jerking a few times above me before we gasp, trying desperately to catch our breaths.
“I can’t…” he says, and for a moment I’m worried he might say something like I can’t do this anymore. Instead, he smiles at me slowly, saying, “I can’t believe that.”
“Me either,” I respond.
“It’s never been like that before.”
Pride swims through me. “Me either.”
He’s still inside me, and I can feel his dick coming to life again the longer he stares at me. “I might need to fuck this little pussy a few more times tonight. I can feel my cum all inside you.” He rocks his hips into me. “I like you nice and messy.”
Who is this man? The dirty words coming out of his mouth are an aphrodisiac. It’s making me hot.
“I love your dirty mouth,” I tell him, so he doesn’t stop.
He pumps his dick, slowly, gingerly as he hoists himself up onto his hands. And then, in one swift motion, he repositions us, so I’m on top, riding his dick.
“This is so much better. I want to watch you play with your tits while you ride me. Fast. Slow. However you want to ride me, baby. Just fucking own me.” His hands grip my hips, his fingers digging into my heated flesh.
I find it incredibly sexy how he’s talking to me. I press my hands into his chest, letting my fingers roam all over his muscular body. His six-pack. Even lower. A familiar sensation of pleasure emerges, signaling another orgasm approaching.
I’ve had more orgasms tonight than I had all last year.
The way he stares at me makes my core heat. The way his eyes roam over my body makes me feel beautiful.
I could get used to this, but I need to remember this all has an end date. Thankfully, that end date isn’t anytime soon.