f i f t e e n
You got me in chains
You got me in chains for your love
But, I wouldn't change
No I wouldn't change this love ?
**
"Where the hell have you been?"
I froze at the sound of Kyle's voice.
There was no mistaking his irritation as his tone was laced with pure venom.
Why am I not surprised?
"I asked you a question, Lilac," he said after I continued to remain silent.
Even though we weren't standing near each other, I could practically feel the wrath radiating off him in waves.
If the circumstances were different, I would probably be shaking in my boots right now.
But given the fact that I specifically told Rebecca to tell Kyle where I was going—and to see that she didn't actually do it—I was a hell of a lot more mad than I was scared.
"Didn't your bitc—I mean, Rebecca—tell you where I was going?" I asked. "Because if she didn't, that's on her."
Kyle rubbed his temples, trying in vain to keep his cool. "I don't have time to stand here and play the blame game with you." His next sentence threw me for a loop. "Especially since your name is now trending on Twitter."
My mouth fell open as this was quite possibly the last thing I expected him to say. "Excuse me?"
Kyle was quick to narrow his eyes at my dumbfounded expression. "You mean to tell me that you have no idea what I'm talking about right now?"
I held back an eye roll.
"That is correct," I verified.
My hip came to rest against the edge of the island as Kyle strode over to where I was standing. He removed his phone from his pocket before he began to tap at his screen. When he finally turned the device around to show me what he was looking at, my heart dropped.
What the hell?
"My publicist just sent me this a few minutes ago," he explained. "She figured that it might be of interest to me."
I rushed to read the article that he had pulled up on his screen:
A lump of air became lodged in my throat as I scrolled down to see a picture of Logan cradling my cheek.
My eyes glossed over the caption that was placed underneath the inserted photo of Logan and his ex-girlfriend on the red carpet back in January.
I skipped to the bottom of the page to read the last paragraph detailing the 'facts' around mine and Logan's relationship.
Kyle slowly retracted his phone from my face after I shook my head at him.
This couldn't be real.
Logan and I parted ways less than five minutes ago, and there was already a Daily Mail article discussing our outing in full detail.
Kyle pocketed his phone, sighing deeply.
From his stare alone, I could tell that he was judging me.
For what? I'm not sure.
"Oh, come on!" I fumed. "That was bullshit, and you know it."
"What the hell does it matter if I know that it's bullshit?" he exclaimed. "Daily Mail is known for being messy with their shit, but that doesn't stop people from reading and believing what they post."
A part of me recognized that he was more than likely speaking from personal experience, which is why I let him get his point across without interrupting.
From what I've seen, there are only a dozen or so articles that have Kyle's name featured in them and that's not including the ones that involve his family.
Now I'm no expert on spotlight coverage, but to me, it seems like the Rodriguez family has a firm grip on how they appear in the media.
For starters, they've yet to be involved in a scandal.
And I mean not a single one.
Then there's the fact that Kyle and Jacques have the best of the best working for them as far as their legal team goes.
If Justin, Kyle, or Kassandra just so happened to slip up one day, no one would ever know.
Granted, I don't think that Kass or Justin would do anything dishonorable given their personalities, but Kyle?
He's up for debate.
"Okay, but this isn't that big of a deal," I argued. "They barely have anything on me. The only real piece of information they have involves me going to UCLA."
My attempt at downplaying the situation didn't go over well.
"You're completely missing the point here," Kyle informed me.
Although he communicated this belief to me in a delicate manner, I could tell that he was on the brink of hysteria.
"There is no escaping the media. They will uncover everything that there is to know about you, and they will use it to their advantage. "
I opened my mouth to object, but he wasn't done.
"They get paid to make stories more dramatic, more . . . entertaining. Hell, they could catch you doing something as innocent as hugging a man, and suddenly you're pregnant with his and your first child."
If this example were any further from the truth, I might've laughed. But outlandish stories like that get printed all of the time, especially in gossip-oriented magazines.
"So, while it may not seem like a problem now," he began ominously, "it could very well be one in the future."
I frowned.
Why was he so worried that something terrible was going to come out of this?
It's not like I leave the house at all since my job doesn't require me to do so. And it's not like his name was mentioned anywhere in the article.
So what precisely were we arguing about here?
Before I could even open my mouth to ask, Kyle muttered something under his breath that I didn't quite catch.
"What was that?" I asked, prompting him to repeat what he had just said.
"I said," he repeated without hesitating, "this is exactly what I didn't want to happen."
I tilted my head. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about you, Lilac!" His sudden display of emotion caught me off guard, so much so that I ended up taking a step away from him.
"All of this," he continued while gesturing towards the area around us, "has to do with you."
The words of reassurance that Logan empowered me with echoed in my mind as I tried to calm myself down before I addressed his statement.
"Yeah, well, right now, none of it has anything to do with you," I retorted sharply. "So, until your name gets thrown into the mix, I'd say that this is more my problem than it is yours."
A wave of silence washed over the room in the wake of my outburst, and instead of lashing out at me like I thought he would, Kyle merely bowed back in defeat.
I've never been one to lose my mind when arguing with someone, but something about Kyle makes me want to scream my freaking head off.
Since the day we first met, we've been bouncing off each other's energy in a way that screams toxic, and it doesn't help that we can both become stuck in our ways when it comes to our beliefs.
Could we start communicating our viewpoints better?
Yes, we certainly could.
Will we?
Probably not.
I say this only because talking to Kyle is like talking to a wall. Once he has an idea in his mind about something, no one else's perspective matters to him.
"From now on, you're not allowed to leave the house without running your plans by me first."
See.
My reaction to his new rule was instantaneous.
"What?!"
Even though his stone-cold expression told me that he wasn't joking, I still found myself saying, "You can't be serious."
Kyle merely arched a brow as if to say, "Does it look like I'm kidding?"
A humorless chuckle escaped my lips.
How the hell did we even get here?
"You know what?" I announced after thinking through all of the rude and malicious things that I so desperately wanted to say. "Fine."
Kyle's lips dipped down into a frown.
"Fine?" he repeated skeptically.
I nodded my head, effectively squashing any of the suspicions that he might've had, floating around in that head of his.
"Fine."
Before he could say anything else, I turned around on my heel and made a move to exit the kitchen. My curiosity prevented me from getting far as I ended up pausing underneath the archway half a second later.
"You planning on going somewhere?" I questioned.
Based on his attire, I could already predict what his answer was going to be.
Kyle typically stays in on Sundays since it's his only real day off. On some rare occasions, he'll leave to go down to the office for the day, and he won't come back until dinner.
Today appeared to be one of those days.
"I'm going down to the office," he replied, confirming my suspicions. "I should be back before six, but that's not a guarantee."
The smile that I proceeded to shoot his way was faker than the tan that Rebecca had sprayed onto her body.
"Great," I told him before I fled the room to head upstairs.
My emotions were a jumbled mess as I made my way down the hallway.
Part of me was happy that I got to spend some time with Logan, while the other part was mad that Kyle ruined my experience within a matter of seconds.
At this point, there was only so much I could do since I was still living under his roof, and that terrifies me more than I'd like to admit.
My mother made me feel as though I had no way out when I was living with her, and now Kyle was starting to do the same.
I wandered into the foyer, paying very little attention to my surroundings.
"Hey," a voice suddenly rang out above me.
I jumped in surprise, my hand coming to rest over my heart as I looked up to see Kassandra sitting at the top of the stairs, waiting for me.
"Come sit," she instructed while patting the space beside her.
My steps were sluggish as my feet carried me up the steps.
Upon my arrival, Kassandra scooted over so that I could sit next to her comfortably, and my elbows came to rest on my knees as I slumped forward so that my cheek could rest against my palm.
Neither one of us spoke for a while, and it was almost as if we were waiting for the other person to make the first move.
Kass slowly shifted around so that her body was angled towards mine, and this position allowed her to stare at me without ever having to twist her head.
I felt compelled to do the same, but I couldn't bring myself to do so.
"I know you heard us," I finally said, breaking the ice.
Kass immediately reached out to touch my arm. "Only bits and pieces."
For some reason, her confession made me feel an odd sense of relief. As if she were a child who just so happened to overhear me fighting with my husband.
Her fingers felt ice-cold against my feverish skin.
"When the shouting started, I had to see what was going on."
"Oh you know," I drawled sarcastically, "it wasn't anything remarkable. Kyle just decided to punish me for something that wasn't even my fault."
I paused to contemplate my words before adding, "Although I guess it was my fault for trusting that crusty-eyed bitch."
A smirk made its way onto my face after Kass choked on a laugh.
"I'm for sure stealing that," she said in between giggles.
When she finally calmed down a minute later, the playful mood that previously filled the air was gone.
"But in all seriousness," she said while tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, "my brother's a dick."
This time it was my turn to laugh.
"Tell me about it," I chuckled.
She shot me a half-smile before she glanced down at her sweatshirt. "Even though he may not act like it, he truly does care about you. That much I know for sure."
My stomach twisted at her sincerity.
Why was everyone so insistent upon this? Is there something else going on that I don't know about?
Kassandra's statement had rendered me speechless.
No right words seemed to come to mind as I tried to formulate a response.
Was I supposed to be flattered? Thankful? Disgusted?
I've never been one to respond well to compliments, assuming that this was one, so my first instinct was to laugh. It's a horrible defense mechanism that I picked up after years and years of emotional abuse, and to this day, I still haven't shaken it.
"That wasn't a joke, honey," Kass stated softly.
My smile instantly dimmed. "I know."
A sympathetic expression slipped onto her face, and if she weren't the closest thing that I had to a friend right now, I would've stood up and left before she could even think about apologizing.
"Why can't you see how amazing you are?" The rawness of her question left me searching for a way to avoid answering it. "How deserving you are to have people in your life who love you?"
I've never been much of a crier, but something about the way that she phrased this brought tears to my eyes.
"Because my mother made it her goal to make me feel as though I wasn't," I said, willing my unshed tears to stay put. "She was always cold towards me, but when my dad died, she froze me out completely."
Kassandra shifted back forward so that she could pull me into her side, and I didn't hesitate to lay my head on her shoulder.
Her left hand became tangled in my hair as she gently cradled my head against her body. "Monica isn't here anymore," she reassured me. "You don't have to be so on guard all of the time."
Her words of comfort helped to settle my nerves, but I couldn't help but frown at the first thing that she said. "How do you know my mother's name?"
She laughed softly, and the action caused her body to shake against my own. "I might've taken a peek at your file after you left here that one day."
I turned to look up at her. "The day of my interview?"
She nodded.
"Kass!" I yelled, nudging her legs with my own. "Some of those documents were confidential!"
She bit down on her lip to try to conceal her amusement.
"I'm sorryyy!" she exclaimed. "You know I'm nosey!"
Understatement of the year, people.
Our laughter soon died down, and it would've resulted in another batch of silence had Kassandra not spoken up again.
"Did any of this help, though?" she asked while dropping her hand down to my bicep.
I paused to think about her question.
Today had been extremely therapeutic.
Between opening up about my future goals with Logan and talking through my past with Kass, I'd say that it did. While this was only the beginning of my setting out to heal my past traumas, it proved to be an extremely beneficial experience.
"Yes." My reply was simple and to the point. "You truly are a godsend."
The hair flip that I received in return was enough to make me roll my eyes at her.
"So I've been told," she smiled, using her grip on my bicep to give me one last encouraging squeeze before she released me from her hold.
I immediately stood up to try to alleviate the numbness in my right asscheek. "I'm gonna go get changed. I want a break and I haven't even started yet."
Kass rose from her spot beside me with her eyebrows furrowed together.
"That reminds me," she said, processing her thoughts out loud. "You need something to wear for Saturday."
I glanced back at her in confusion, having taken a step up from where we had been sitting. "What's happening on Saturday?"
She giggled innocently. "Why, my parents' charity banquet, of course! They throw one every year!"
I threw my hands up in disbelief. "When was someone going to tell me about this?"
She shrugged. "I'm telling you about it now."
My anxiety flew through the roof at this newfound information.
From the moment we met, I picked up on the vibe that Sarah wasn't too fond of me. She didn't exactly try to hide it either, as she was constantly dishing out judgmental comments and stares.
Imagine sitting through that again.
"Yeah, I'm gonna pass on this one," I said, shuddering at the thought.
"Cute of you to think that you had a choice," Kass retorted with a smirk. "Everyone in connection with Kyle is expected to attend, blood or not."
She then reached up to tap her chin. "I would say that you could borrow my most recent Givenchy gown, but you're a lot curvier than I am, so it would probably be a bit snug in the waist and bust."
"Suffocating to death doesn't sound all that bad," I mused, hoping that she would agree with me.
"Ha ha," she laughed sarcastically. "Very funny."
I gave her a small curtsy, making sure to lift the ends of my sundress so that she could see the strips of my ankles. "Thank you! I'll be here all day."
Kass folded her arms across her chest, sucking away any bit of optimism that I had left. "You know what this means, right?"
Even though her question was exceptionally vague, I knew what she was getting ready to say, which is why I decided to play dumb.
"That we should go out for ice cream?" I suggested, shooting her my most dazzling grin.
She rolled her eyes at me. "No, chica."
My heart sank.
There wasn't any getting out of this.
So when Kassandra came bouncing up the stairs to meet me where I stood, I put on a happy face. Her hands instantly latched onto my shoulders so that she could shake some sense into me.
"It means," she began excitedly, "we get to go shopping!"