28. Harlow
I walk into Dottie’s just after six. Margot is already here.
“Hey!” I give her a big smile as I slide into the booth opposite her.
“Hey.” Her smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes.
“Oh, no. You’re really sad this time.” I reach across the table for her hand. “You’ve got it bad, huh? We’re going to need cookies and cream milkshakes,” I say.
Margot raises her brows. “That’s what you get when you’re celebrating.”
I lean in on both forearms and give her a smile. “Don’t hate me. I’m sorry you’re sad. But I am celebrating that you’re in love with Graham.”
“You are never in this good mood after Ginny and Graham leave,” Margot says, sitting back and crossing her arms.
I sigh. “I know, it’s all Jefferson’s fault. He actually has the ability to put me in a good mood. Who would’ve guessed?”
She laughs. “Most of the town?”
“Shut up.” But I’m grinning.
“Well, I didn’t actually ask you here to talk about Graham,” Margot says. “I mean…well, it’s adjacent I guess.”
I frown and lean in further. “Are you pregnant?” I ask in a whisper.
She frowns and looks around quickly. “No. Harlow!”
“What? I’m trying to figure out what adjacent means.”
“If you can be patient for two minutes, I’ll tell you,” Margot says with an eye roll.
Just then, Lizzie, one of the teenagers who waitresses here part-time, comes to the table. “Hi! What can I get you?”
We both order our usuals and wait until she brings our drinks back. Then I say, “Okay, spill it.”
“I’m…getting a new job,” Margot says after a deep breath.
I straighten. “Really? I didn’t know you were looking for something else.”
The thing about small town Nebraska, as much as I love it and find it charming and cozy, is that the jobs are somewhat limited.
“What’s the job?”
“You know that new company that’s coming to town to partner with IAS?” she asks.
I nod. “I know a little about it.”
As much as anyone else in town who has read the city council’s meeting notes that are published on the Sapphire Falls website. IAS is Jefferson’s dad’s company, and they do a lot with agriculture. The new company is a green energy company. They are based in Colorado, but they’re partnering with IAS on a project and will have an office here.
“I’m going to be an executive assistant with them,” Margot says.
My eyes widen. “That’s amazing. Good for you!”
She smiles, clearly proud. “In Denver.”
Those two words take a little time to sink in. “Excuse me?”
She takes a deep breath, straightens, then leans in, resting her elbows on the table. She meets my gaze directly. “They actually offered me the job here in Sapphire Falls. But they also have a position open in Denver. And I started thinking, if they like me enough for the job here, maybe they’d give me the job in Denver. And they did.”
I stare at her. “If they gave you the job here, why do you want to go to Denver?” As soon as I say it out loud, I realize that’s a really dumb question. “Oh, Graham.”
But she shakes her head quickly. “Actually, I applied for the job and got it before I knew anything was going to happen with Graham. He’s kind of just a perk. The sprinkles on top. I wanted to see if maybe I could do something outside of Sapphire Falls. Just to…try something new.”
My stomach knots. This sounds so familiar. “I didn’t know you wanted to try something new.”
“I love Sapphire Falls,” she says. “You know that. But it’s a good feeling to know that someone somewhere else wants me too. And I just want to see what it’s like. To live somewhere bigger, different. It’s like a new pair of shoes. It doesn’t mean I don’t like my favorite pair and want to wear them again. But a new pair can be fun sometimes too.”
I swallow and nod. “And you can’t wear two pairs of shoes at the same time.”
She reaches across the table and. “I have no idea if I’ll like Denver. It might not work out. It might be terrible. The new shoes might pinch my feet or look terrible with all of my outfits. But it’s like Jefferson said, if I don’t try it, I’ll always wonder. And Sapphire Falls is a fabulous place to come home too. It’s always here. It’s always home.”
My throat feels thick. “Jefferson said that?”
She smiles. “Yeah. And he would know right?”
“Yeah.” My voice sounds funny. “He would know.”
Our food arrives and we eat while she tells me about the job. It’s Executive Assistant to the CEO of the company. It sounds incredible. She’ll be making a lot of money, even though living in Denver will cost a ton more than Sapphire Falls. They are going to help her find an apartment and get settled.
Apparently, I am only the second person she’s told. After Jefferson.
I also find out that she leaves in two weeks.
Actually twelve days.
We walk out to our cars together and she gives me a hug.
“I’m so relieved that you know. I was so nervous to tell you. “
I do hate that she felt scared about telling me something she is clearly very excited about. “I’m really proud of you. I know this is a big deal. I’m glad you’re excited.”
She gives me a small smile. “You’re going to miss me. I’m going to miss you too. It makes this easier knowing that you’re with Jefferson.”
Right. I am with Jefferson. The guy who keeps making people I love leave me.
But I smile back at her. “Now I have two reasons to come visit Denver. And it makes me feel better that you’re not going to be there alone. Graham will help you get settled. I’m sure. He’s probably thrilled.” I frown. “Wait, Graham doesn’t know?”
“No,” she says. “I want to get there, and get settled, and start the job. I don’t want him to think that I moved for him or that I’m stalking him or expect anything. I’ll let him know once I’m there. And we can see how it goes.”
I do have to laugh at that. “He’s crazy about you, Margot. He’s going to be thrilled.”
She ducks her head a little shyly. “I hope so. But this move is a big deal for me. I don’t want to make it just about him.”
“I understand.” I give her another hug. “I’m going to try not to meddle and I’ll try not to spill your news to him before you do.”
She pulls back and gives me a serious look. “Graham and I talked about our relationship and you. We don’t need to talk about each other with you. You’re too close to both of us. That’s a little awkward.”
I sigh. “I hear you.”
“I guess you’re just going to have to talk about us with Jefferson.”
I don’t say anything to that. But yeah…I have a few things to talk to Jefferson about.
Once I’m in my car, I decide I need to take a drive and think things over.
I need to figure out where I stand on a few things before I go home to Jefferson and yell at him about…
I sigh as I start my car. I don’t even know what I’d yell about.
This is Jefferson. And me. This is how it’s always going to be.
I drive up to Klein’s Hill, the tall hill south of town where the entire village can be seen spread out with the warm lights glowing. It’s a popular spot and it’s a rite of passage for all teenagers in Sapphire Falls to make out up on this hill.
Thankfully, on a Sunday night, I’m the only one here.
I park my car, get out, and climb up on the hood. I look out over the town I love so very much. The town where I’ve spent my life. Where I intend to spend the rest of it.
But I’m in love with Jefferson.
And I know that if I spend that life with him here, he is going to really piss me off sometimes.
Okay, I spend that life with him anywhere , he is going to really piss me off sometimes.
I blow out a breath.
If I think I miss Alex, and that I’m upset and sad after Ginny and Graham leave, at the thought of Margot leaving, I can’t imagine how I’m going to feel when our children leave Sapphire Falls to go out and see the world. And how I’ll feel when they become amazing whatever-they’re-going-to-be somewhere else, far from here. How I’ll feel every Leaving Day.
Especially knowing that Jefferson encouraged them to go.
How am I going to handle that?
I need to give that serious thought now.
We’re getting to the point of no return. We’re talking about the future. We’ve said the word ‘marriage’. Our families are involved. Our friends are all in on this.
Am I all in?
I hear tires crunching behind me and look down at my phone. I’ve been sitting here for forty minutes.
And I’ve missed a bunch of calls and texts.
I am not surprised when I see Jefferson’s truck pull in next to me.
He gets out and stomps over. “What are you doing?” he demands.
I narrow my eyes at him. “I’m thinking about how much I like you. And how much I hate you.”
He tucks his hands in the back pockets of his jeans and blows out a breath. “You can’t do that at my house?”
I turn more fully to face him. “You had to know that she’d tell me.”
“I told her she had to tell you, or I would.”
Okay, well, that’s something. “So you had to know I’d be pissed.”
“Of course I knew that.”
I weaken a little just knowing how well he knows me. “You thought I’d just come straight over after that?”
He spreads his arms wide. “No. I thought you’d go to your house. So I gave you thirty minutes to cool off and then went over to talk. Then when you weren’t there, I kind of started to worry. Then when Margot said you didn’t tell her where you were going and you weren’t at your mom and dad’s, and Graham hadn’t heard from you, I actually started to worry.”
Dammit. I love how well he knows me. I thought about going home. But my house doesn’t feel right anymore. I didn’t think I’d actually be comforted being there alone.
And…I hadn’t thought about talking to anyone else.
Jefferson is who I need to talk to about this. Once I’ve figured out what I want to say.
“And then you drove straight up here?”
“This is the first place I thought of after your house and your mom and dad’s.”
I turn and look back over the town. “I told you I didn’t want to be alone tonight, and I was going to spend the night with you.”
“That was before you found out that I talked to one of your very good friends and told her I thought her moving to Denver was a good idea.”
“Again.”
“Yeah.” He sighs. “Again.” He shoves a hand through his hair and moves closer to the car. “So how mad are you?”
“On a scale from zero to ten?”
“Yeah.”
I shrug. “Two. Now.”
He rounds the front of the car to stand directly in front of me. He’s frowning. “You’re sitting up here alone instead of at home with me and you’re only at a two ? What the hell are you going to do when I get you to an eight?”
I frown. “You’re going to get me to an eight?”
“You and me? Over seventy years of life together? I’m sure.”
I melt a little more. “I guess I’ll need to come up here then,” I tell him.
“To do what?”
“Think things over.”
“Things like what? Like if you’re still in love with me? If you can be with me? Because that’s crap, Harlow. You do love me. Of course you can be with me. We’re amazing together. You don’t need to think that over.”
I drop my arms from around my knees, straighten my legs, and scoot to the front end of my car. My knees bump his thighs. “No. I don’t need to think about any of that, Jefferson. I’m not an idiot. I know we’re amazing together. I just needed a minute to figure out how to explain this to you and I knew if I walked into your house and saw you on the couch cuddling a couple of cats and you looked up and smiled at me, I would…just fall in love with you all over again and not actually say what I need to say.”
The look on his face is a mix of relief and exasperation and love. I love that look.
“Okay, what do you need to say? But hurry up. I need to kiss you.”
I take a breath. “That I know that you are going to do this same damned thing with all of the people in our lives. Including our children. Maybe especially our children.” I sigh. “You are going to push them, you are going to give them wings. You’re going to tell them about the great big wide world out there that they should experience. You’re going to tell them that there are places other than Sapphire Falls where they can be happy, where they can make a difference, where they can meet other people that will love them and appreciate them.”
I scoot even closer to him, narrowing my eyes. “But I’m warning you, at the same time, I am going to love them so hard that it’s going to be difficult for them to leave. I’m going to help them make so many memories in this town with these people that they’ll weep when they drive away. Our children will be spoiled rotten and I will be their favorite. I don’t believe that you can love someone too much. So our children are going to have a father who is going to encourage them and push them while their mother is going to coddle them and try to keep them at home, and, well, we’re probably going to argue about that.”
I take a deep breath. “And I just figured I needed to explain that to you right now so that we’re both going into this eyes wide open.”
He stands there staring at me for several heartbeats. Then he says, “You’ve been out here thinking about our children.”
I swallow hard. “Of course. And we’re probably going to need to have a few. We’re going to make pretty amazing kids. We probably owe the world more than one or two. But the more we have, the more you and I will probably fight.” I’m watching him just watch me with a look in his eyes that’s hot and full of love. “Of course, the more we have, the better chances I have of one of them staying close,” I add with a small eye roll.
“How many?” he asks.
“How many fights? Hundreds .”
One corner of his mouth tips up. “Kids. How many kids are we going to have?”
My stomach swoops as my heart thumps hard. “Oh. At least four. Maybe five.” I swallow hard again. “Of course, we can adopt some. Or several.”
He takes my face in both hands and says, “God, I love you so much.”
I feel tears stinging my eyes, but I smile. “I know. You’re very smart.”
“You’re going to make my life very difficult, aren’t you?”
My smile grows. “See? Very smart.”
He leans in until our noses touch. “Harlow?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you going to marry me?”
I wrap my arms around his neck. “Yes, Jefferson, I’m going to marry you.”
“Finally,” he mutters. Then he lowers his head to kiss me.
But I pull back.
He lifts a brow.
“And we’re going to live happily ever after. In freaking Sapphire Falls.”
He laughs. “Of course we are. Where else would we possibly go?”
I give him a little growl of frustration. He’s such a pain in the ass. “I’m serious. I’m dying in this town. And if I go first, you have to put my urn on your mantle and keep me there until you die. Then our kids—or Graham and Ginny if our kids all live on other continents and never come home to visit us because their grand life adventures keep them too busy—can bury us together.”
He rolls his eyes. “Jesus, Harlow.”
“I know that’s dramatic, but?—”
“There is no way you’re going first,” he interrupts, pulling me even closer. “Even being in a fake relationship with you for a week has aged me a year, I swear.”
“Very funny,” I say as I pull him down for a long, hot kiss overlooking our beloved hometown.
But the thing is, though I would never admit it, Jefferson Riley is actually pretty funny. And sweet. And smart. And sexy.
Okay, fine, I probably will admit that from time to time. If he asks very nicely. And is doing that thing he does with his tongue…
I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him.
Here in freaking Sapphire Falls.
Thank you so much for reading Make Her Mine! I hope you loved Jefferson and Harlow and this trip to Sapphire Falls!