Chapter 22
Margot: The police are on their way.
Me: What?! Why??
Margot: Your porch light is off.
Me: Omg Margot, I forgot! I’m so sorry. I’m fine! Abort the police! Can you call them?
Margot: Yeah, like I have the direct number for the police. Kidding—of course I do. Also, they’re not on their way. This is just a drill. But next time you forget to turn it on, they will be, so don’t let it happen again.
Me: You almost gave me a heart attack.
Margot: You’re young, you can handle it. Now, why did you forget?
Me: Really no reason. Just forgot.
Margot:
Me: ?
Margot: Sorry. Typo.
Benjamin leaves for work early in the morning. It feels weird saying goodbye at my door, weird because I don’t want him to leave.
Yesterday’s rainstorm has passed and left the air damp and chilly.
The porch railing glitters with dew. We don’t say much.
I’m wearing the hoodie I borrowed from him at movie night, my legs and feet bare.
He looks just as good as yesterday, not a trace of the few hours of sleep we’ve had on his handsome face. It’s really not fair.
We lock eyes for a moment before he brushes a kiss to my lips with an expression I can’t interpret.
“I’ll talk to you later.”
I nod slowly, not sure what that means. He lingers, as if reluctant to leave, before sauntering down the porch steps.
I don’t move, remaining in the doorway, watching him go.
It’s not until I can’t see him anymore that I go back inside.
I pause in the hall for a moment, thinking about the last eight hours.
I’ve had the best sex of my life. With Benjamin Reyes.
He did things to my body I thought were just myths. And it was incredible.
But the weird thing is, the part I liked most wasn’t the sex. It was what happened afterwards.
When he held me close.
When he drew small, featherlight circles on my back with his fingers.
When he traced the outline of my body with his hand.
And when he couldn’t stop smelling my hair.
I make myself a big cup of coffee before walking over to Margot’s to pick up Cactus, who comes running to meet me with her tail spinning like a propeller.
I smile from the inside out when I crouch down to pet her, and she wrestles me to the ground.
She licks my face while I laugh, trying to escape.
A month ago, I side-eyed someone who let this dog lick her face.
Apparently, things have changed. Seeing her this happy to see me makes me happy in a way I can’t even begin to explain.
“You had a nice evening, dear?” Margot asks me as Cactus settles down. Well, a bit at least.
I nod. “Yeah. It was nice. There were a lot of people.”
“I can imagine. You met someone I know?”
“Iris. And Jake who was working, of course.”
“No one else . . . ?”
“Um . . .” I pretend to think. “No one that I can think of . . .”
“You sure, honey?”
I shoot her a quick glance, narrowing my eyes suspiciously. What is she getting at? What does she know?
“I mean, it was crowded and kind of dark so . . .”
“I see.” She inhales. “So, did you meet . . . hm, let’s see . . . Benjamin Reyes, for example? The very handsome veterinarian.”
I feel my cheeks getting heated in a second. Quickly, I dust some invisible dirt off my shorts. “Yeah, maybe he was there. I can’t really remember.”
“I understand. One can’t remember everything. Only the most memorable things.”
I feel kind of relieved when I get to leave. Cactus jumps beside me, looking like she’s telling me all about the fun things she did last night. She’s the cutest thing I know.
We spend the morning at home before we walk into town. I can’t wait to visit Viv and hear all about Pearl Day. I’m dying to know.
We stop by Gertrude’s to pick up some more coffee—there’s no such thing as too much coffee, I think—and pause on the sidewalk to exchange thoughts about the weather with some locals.
I pop by Dave to buy super glue—to discount, he informs me three times—and the enormous grin on his face leaves me with no choice but to also buy a spanner. At that, he looks like he’s about to burst from happiness, and at that, I need to leave before I buy tools whose names I don’t even know.
Viv lights up when I push open the door.
“June!” she exclaims with a smile.
“Hi, Viv. I brought you some coffee.” I hand her the paper cup.
“You did? You’re such a doll. Thank you, honey.”
I’m brimming with curiosity, so I cut right to the chase. “Tell me everything about yesterday. Were there many people?”
“Actually, yes. I’m almost out of pareos now.” She gives me a pointed look, and I smile from ear to ear.
“Really? Wow, that’s amazing. Did you place another order?”
“No, because I wanted to discuss it with you first. You think I should?”
“Hm. Usually, when do the last tourists leave—early or late August?”
“Early September.”
“Then yes, you should definitely place another order.”
“Okay. Same colors as before?”
“Same colors, but I think you should add some patterns.”
“If I show you, can you help me choose?”
My answer comes quicker than lightning. “Of course.”
“You’re the best. Are you busy now?”
I shake my head. “Nope. I’m all yours.”
When we’re done, I inspect my nails. “So . . . do you need any help unpacking it when it arrives?”
“I’d love your help.”
I look up with a smile. “Really? I’ll be here.” There’s another thing I’ve been thinking about for some time, but I don’t know how to bring it up without her thinking I’m meddling.
“Anything else on your mind, honey?” she asks after a quick look at me. Is it that obvious? “Just say it. You know I love hearing your thoughts.”
“Um. It’s just that . . . I think you should let people know you have new arrivals in the store.”
She tilts her head with a raised eyebrow. “But I don’t have any new arrivals.”
“I know, but . . .” I choose my words carefully. I don’t want her to feel offended.
“Stop being so polite, darling. Just say it.”
“You have a lot of non-seasonal clothes, and I think you should call them new arrivals. Make people believe you just got them. Call it a Pre-Fall Collection. Spark people’s curiosity and remind them that a new season is coming soon.”
“But I want to sell pareos?”
“And you will. You’ll keep displaying your pareos on the rack outside, but you can still hint about new arrivals. People love new stuff. Do you have a pavement sign?”
“I think so . . .”
“Use it to tell everyone about the new collection. I’ll help you make it look like you have one.”
A smile spreads across her face. “Okay.”
I glance around. “If you have it here somewhere, I can help you now . . . ? If you want to?” I hurry to add.
“I think I have it somewhere in the back. One moment.”
She disappears but is back soon with a black chalkboard on legs. Bingo.
“Perfect.”
“I’ll leave it in your hands then, honey. Feel free to do whatever you want. I trust you.”
A warmth settles in my chest. She trusts me.
Three hours later, Viv has a sign outside, telling people Pre-Fall Collection in store now. Be the first with the latest. The store has a fresh new look and really gives the impression of being full of new arrivals.
“I love it,” Viv says, her eyes triumphant and a new cup of coffee in her hand. Her tanned cowboy boots click against the floor as she takes a closer look at the result.
“Really?” I say, trying to hide how ridiculously happy that makes me.
“Yes. I don’t know what I would do without you.” She spins around and pins me with her blue eyes.
I flush and avert my gaze.
“Have you ever considered an online store? I mean, that way you could reach out to so many more people. Every tourist who visits and loves this place will be able to keep shopping here even when they’re not actually here.
They can return to Pearlband Beach whenever they want, and you can increase your profits.
You won’t be as sensitive to economic cycles.
And you won’t be putting all your eggs in one basket. ”
Viv cocks her head. “That sounds like a dream of yours.”
I smile quickly. “I’m already living my dream—back in New York.”
She narrows her eyes. “You sure about that, honey?”
I open my mouth to answer but have to close it again when no words leave my lips, to my own big confusion. I am living my dream, I know I am.
But why can’t I say it all of a sudden?
I spend the afternoon in my overalls, working in the garden with Cactus. It’s a good place to be because there’s always something to do which is a perfect distraction if you’re an overthinker. Well, an okay distraction at least.
One thing I seem unable to stop thinking about is Benjamin and last night. It was . . . fantastic. Without a doubt the best sex of my entire life. Just the thought of it is leaving my vagina freaking thumping and my skin evolving in goosebumps. Like, is that normal?
I haven’t heard from him since we said goodbye early this morning, and I’ve checked my phone way too many times. Embarrassingly many times. And I’m not even sure what I hope to find there.
When it starts to rain late in the afternoon, I decide I’m done for the day. I shower and eat some leftovers in front of the TV. Maybe I should watch a movie, but which one? Clara’s words suddenly pop up in my head. What was the name of the one she thought I should see? Hm. Huchi? Huchichi?
Me: What was the name of that dog movie?
Clara: Hachi: A Dog’s Tale.
Clara: Wait, are you gonna watch it??
Clara: Now?
Clara: Omg.
Clara: Do you have tissues??
Clara: Like, many?
Me: No. But isn’t it just a movie about a dog?
Clara: Wow. You’re so naive. You’re gonna regret those words.
Me:
Clara: Don’t call me when you cry harder than when Jack couldn’t fit on the door.
Clara: Don’t roll your eyes at me! You’ll regret it.
It’s so much worse than when Jack couldn't fit on the door. So. Much. Worse. And I can’t stop crying.
It’s a horror movie—a real horror movie.
My eyes are glued to the screen even though I want nothing more than to turn the freaking thing off.
I don’t want to watch it anymore. But it’s too late. I’m already ruined. Forever.
Tears are streaming. No. They’re flooding. Pouring. The pint of ice cream (Salted Caramel from H?agen-Dazs, obviously) is a sad soup of tears and melted ice cream now. And I don’t even notice.
My eyes land on Cactus, lying at my feet on the couch. She started ignoring me when she realized the tears wouldn’t stop falling.
“I lobe you,” I cry. “I lobe you.” I wrap my arms around her, burying my face deep in her fur.
I will never leave her. I will never have a bad thought about her ever again.
I will never get tired of her. I will give her her favorite food every day for the rest of my life.
I will never let her out of my sight ever.
I’m sobbing and hiccuping. How could this movie ever have been approved?
How? And how could Clara recommend that I watch it?
What have I ever done to her? And how could she even compare it to when Jack didn’t fit on that door?
This is so much worse. An urgent need to tell her this makes me reach for my phone, but I’m interrupted halfway by a hard knock on my door. “June? You in there?”
Benjamin. What’s he doing here? Another knock, harder this time.
“June!” I hiccup and stumble off the couch. He’s raking both hands through his hair when the door swings open, and the worry on his face gets ten times worse when his eyes register the tears on my cheeks. One stride, and he’s up to me, capturing my jaw.
“June, what happened? What’s wrong?”
I hiccup. “Hachi.”
“Bless you. But please, sweetheart, tell me what happened.”
I’m suddenly confused. “What do you—hiccup—mean?”
“I’ve called you and texted you. You haven’t replied.”
“I haven’t checked my phone for a while because I’ve been watching a movie.”
He inhales deeply. “So, nothing’s happened? You’re okay?”
Another hiccup. “I’m okay. Well, no. I’ve been watching the most awful movie ever.”
He sighs heavily, dragging a hand down his face. “Jesus, June. I thought something had happened to you.”
I wipe at my eyes. “You were worried? About me?” I lift one eyebrow. “Benjamin Reyes was worried?”
“For fuck’s sake,” he mumbles, shaking his head. It looks like he’s been hurrying.
I smile teasingly. And okay, pretty smugly. And when he’s scooping me up from the ground and placing me over his shoulder—exposing my pink thong under the Coffee is for pussies T-shirt—I scream and laugh at the same time.