43. Gabriel
Chapter forty-three
Gabriel
Unbreakable blenders.
I can’t explain how I feel at this moment. It’s like I’ve just woken up and taken everything in. My red-rimmed eyes sting with unshed tears as I hold my beautiful girl’s shaking body while she cries for our missing piece.
I don’t feel worthy of her at this moment. I don’t deserve to be the one holding her, the one she seeks out through her pain. Because I froze. When she needed me most, when my best friend was bleeding out on our kitchen floor and she needed my help, I froze.
I fucking froze.
All I could do was stare at the body lying at my feet, the one I hit hard enough to kill. I didn’t mean to kill him. My intention was only to knock him out. But as I reached for the blender and lifted it in the air, every emotion I had ever felt from the moment I was born to now resurfaced.
Every hit my parents gave me, every broken bone, every night I cried myself to sleep in agony from the torture they inflicted on me.
It all came rushing back, and when I let my hand come down with the heavy object, it was with all the strength I’d wish I had back then.
I didn’t see him, I saw them, and that was it.
It took Marcos telling me to snap out of it, that my girl needed me and that she couldn’t go through this alone, to pull me out of my fogged state.
And from that moment, my eyes haven’t left her.
They’ve been glued to her like she’s the only thing holding me together.
My center. She needs me right now, just as much as I need her.
I lift her into my arms as she cradles against my chest like a wounded animal and take her back to the waiting room, with Marcos and Ricky not far behind holding Blubber’s carrier.
I know I shouldn’t make promises like the one I just did, telling her Noah would pull through, but I can’t think of the worst right now. I need to stay strong for all of us.
Because if I don’t, I’ll break down, and there won’t be anyone there to support my girl. The thought of losing my best friend, losing my brother… it guts me and makes it impossible to breathe. So no, I can’t think of that. Because we aren’t losing him. I won’t accept it…
I can’t.
When we get back to the waiting area, I find it filled with familiar faces. Friends, family, teammates—they’re all here. Silas stands, coming over to me immediately.
“We came as soon as we heard.” He looks down at Ronnie in my arms and strokes the back of her head with his hand.
“How?... Where?... Who?” I’m confused, unable to think clearly.
I’m glad they’re here, but I don’t know how they found out. I haven’t even thought about calling anyone. I don’t even know where my phone is right now.
“Jessie. He went to Burkley’s and told him what happened when he got word of what was going on,” he confirms for me.
I nod and bring Ronnie over to a chair between the girls, who all stand with tears running down their faces. When I set her down, needing a moment to collect myself, they gather around her, holding her in their arms.
I turn my back to them, taking deep breaths as all my teammates come by and hug me, showing me their support as best as they can. Clay, Greyson, and Silas stay by my side as the first tears begin to spill. I look up at the ceiling, trying to keep my composure.
Silas presses his hand to my back, rubbing up and down with his palm. “He’s going to be all right. Noah’s a tough motherfucker. Nothing will knock him down.”
“I hope you’re right, because I promised Ronnie that he would… and I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t…” I choke on the words, not wanting to think about him not pulling through.
“I’m going to kill that piece of shit when I see him,” Greyson grumbles out with rage.
“He’s dead,” I say, looking back down and making eye contact with each one.
“He is?” Clay asks curiously.
I nod. “Killed him with my blender…”
“Damn…” Grey’s eyes widen.
“It didn’t even break.”
Clay frowns. “What?”
“The blender. It didn’t break.” I have no idea why I’m saying it, why this particular detail is sticking with me. I guess trauma just works in weird ways.
“Well, shit… that’s one strong-ass blender. We should probably all get one of those," Silas says in a low voice, but apparently not low enough.
“Silas!” Cecilia rebukes him. “This isn’t the time or place.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry.” He looks down with shame.
“It really is a good blender,” I say after a moment of silence, and we all kind of lose it, me included.
We’re all suddenly chuckling quietly; I can even hear some of the girls trying to control themselves.
But not Ronnie. Ronnie just stays quiet in her seat, eyes staring down at her hands.
I know this isn’t the time to laugh, but there are so many emotions coursing through my body right now that I have no control over it.
Morgan comes up to me, taking me in her arms as the tears start flowing again. “I’m going to take Blubber back to our place and get some spare clothes and shoes for Ronnie.” She pulls back and holds me by the arms. “Do you need me to get anything else?”
I shake my head. “No. Thank you.”
She smiles with glassy eyes, sniffling as she turns and heads over to Ricky. She takes the carrier from him and walks out of the emergency’s waiting room, just as the Storm brothers walk in. Marcos and Ricky reach them a few feet away, whispering to their bosses as Shane joins them as well.
They finally come over, and I see the moment Ronnie finally snaps out of her silent state.
The second she spots them, she throws the blanket off her shoulders and stands, marching up to them and smacking Julian in the face.
A loud cracking sound resonates through the room as her hand makes contact with his cheek.
“YOU SWORE! YOU PROMISED YOU’D PROTECT US!
” she shouts in his face, then smacks her fists against his chest. “You said nothing would happen to us! You said you wouldn’t let him hurt us!
But you lied!” She hits him harder, but he doesn’t attempt to stop her.
He takes every hit that comes his way, letting her release the frustration she’s been holding on to.
“You lied, and now he’s going to die!” she cries harder.
I move in to pull her away, but Clay beats me to it.
He wraps his arms around Ronnie and lifts her off the ground as she fights against his hold, screaming and crying.
He gets down to the floor against the wall and cages her in by holding down her arms and placing a leg over hers to stop her from trying to kick him.
She grows more and more hysterical by the second, thrashing her head from side to side and screaming at the top of her lungs.
The nurse that saw her earlier returns with a pair of cheap hospital slippers and a hospital gown. “I’m sorry, this is all I could find.” She looks over to Ronnie, who’s still losing it in Clay’s arms while Cecilia kneels at her feet trying to calm her down.
“Oh, dear.” She presses her hands to her lips. “We can give her something to calm down, but we’ll have to admit her for the time being.”
“Do it,” I say without hesitation.
I know I should go over there, take her in my arms, and hold her until she settles. But I can’t. Watching her like that is killing me and I feel like it’s my fault. Maybe if I had snapped out of it sooner and helped her, Noah wouldn’t have lost so much blood.
Maybe if I had stayed home this morning like I wanted to, I could have stopped this from happening. But I didn’t listen. I didn’t listen to my gut, just like I didn’t listen when she told me she couldn’t stop the bleeding.
She hurries over to the nurses’ station with Julian following behind her.
I’m not sure what he tells her, but she nods and rushes off.
Coming back a minute later with another nurse and a syringe in hand.
They gather around Ronnie and Clay, holding her as still as possible, and stab her in the arm with it.
“It will act quickly. In the meantime, we’ll set you up in a room for her to rest,” the nurse tells me as she comes back to my side, then looks on at everyone gathered here for us, for Noah. “They can all come up too. The room is pretty spacious.”
I nod and walk up to Clay and an already calming down Ronnie, her eyelids slowly drooping as her head falls back against Clay. I crouch down and take her from his arms while her body grows heavy and she falls unconscious, then follow the nurse as she leads us to her room.
Two hours later, we’re all up in Veronica’s room as she sleeps soundly on the hospital bed, still knocked out by whatever they gave her.
It’s been three hours in all, and we still have no news about Noah.
We know he was taken into surgery the moment he arrived, but this feels like it’s taking too long, and I hate it.
Everyone is lying around, waiting. There’s a couch at the far end with Greyson, Clay, and Silas on it. Emma, Morgan, and Cecilia sitting in their laps. The nurses also brought in a few chairs that have been claimed by a few of our teammates.
The rest are all scattered around the room, sitting on the floor with their backs against the walls. A few of them went home an hour ago, asking for updates when we get them. I’m not mad that they left; I get it, they have their own lives as well. Just the fact that they showed up was enough.
Aubrey is sitting on the bed behind Ronnie as she passes her fingers through her hair, keeping her calm even in her sleep. While I sit on the opposite side, Ronnie’s hand lies over my thigh, holding on to me.
Shane walks back into the room with two coffee cups in hand, the three brothers following not far behind him.
He walks over to Aubrey’s side and hands her one of them.
“I added some hazelnut creamer. I figured since you bake sweets, you probably like your coffee the same way,” he whispers as his cheeks take on a tiny light-pink shade.
“Oh, thank you.” She takes the coffee from him, and instead of a tiny shade of pink, hers goes bright red.