Chapter Twenty
TWENTY
Tonight, there will be an intruder bunking with me in my room and Stars I hope it’s Lillian because the alternative … I don’t think I can cope with that. The worst part is I can’t even tell anyone about it.
I have no one to confide in and explain how scared I am. Because that’s what I am. I’m scared. And it’s not even for the reasons that I know would make more sense. Like an unknown killer walking through the halls of the academy who sent Harley to an early grave, and then tried to pin it on me.
No, I’m more frightened of the green-eyed third year who knows far too much about me.
He knows my family. He knows what I look like when I first wake up.
He knows the colour of the walls in my bedroom at home.
He knows what my eyes look like when I’m angry and he knows what they look like when I’m not.
He just … knows. And I thought I knew things about him too.
Until I came here and found a person so unlike the one that I often found myself thinking of.
I don’t know him, not anymore and that’s what scares me.
And now, I’m being forced to share my bedroom with him at night, while Nicks searches for the person responsible for this mess.
Will Sebastian be waiting outside my door when I get there after dinner?
Or will he have found a way inside and I’ll discover him laying on my bed with my measly towel blanket and makeshift jersey pillow discarded on the floor.
Stars, I don’t know what to expect from him.
I thought he’d be fuming at Nicks over this idea.
But instead, I looked over and saw nothing but a resolute expression on his face.
He gave zero emotions away, no inclination as to how he was feeling about this new development. He wouldn’t even look at me.
There’s something strange about Sebastian and Nicks.
Their dynamic isn’t like other professors and students.
I’ve noticed them on more than one occasion sharing weighted glances, as if they’re having a private conversation in their heads.
Not to mention when I followed them to his office.
The topic of that conversation still remains a mystery to me.
Something sinister lurks within the limestone walls of this academy.
And I don’t care how much Nicks tries to drill into my head that someone is out to get me, because deep down, I know this didn’t begin with me.
Whatever is going on precedes my journey here, maybe even Lukas’s.
I can feel it building within the confines of my skin.
If the students were wary when I joined, I just hope the news of Harley’s death doesn’t reach them and make it worse.
Before we went separate ways, Nicks informed us that Headmaster Zain will most likely try to keep this quiet.
Play it off as Harley being sent home or pulled from the academy by his family.
The only people who know about what happened are myself, Lillian and the men that were in Bartollo’s office with me.
How Lillian found out? I have no clue, but I intend to ask her when I see her next. Hopefully tonight.
I’m so rattled by the events of the morning that I’ve barely listened to a thing the Elemental professor has been saying as she weaves in and out of students sitting on the grass.
This is the one class I need to pay attention to.
With a deep exhale, I try my best to put what happened out of my head and focus as we are instructed to turn to our partners and get to work.
I spin my body around on the soft patch of grass and face Xavier, shooting him a guilty look.
Tilly sits ahead of us, paired with another first year from Opal.
‘I’m going to be completely honest, I didn’t hear a word she said up there,’ I admit.
The warm sun bears down on my back, heating my black shirt and my skin beneath it.
We’re all seated beside the infirmary, which is possibly the safest place to be with a bunch of first years learning to control multiple different elements.
Xavier’s brows dip as he leans an elbow on his knee, resting his cheek on his closed fist. ‘Stars, are you all right?’ he asks, finally taking a proper look at me. ‘You look …’
‘Like shit?’ I offer, because I feel like it.
A quiet chuckle shakes his shoulders. ‘That’s not what I was going to say. Plus, you couldn’t look like shit if you tried.’
‘Oh, I sincerely doubt that. You should have seen me right after my CNM class yesterday. I looked like I took a vacation to the sun.’
We trade banter. It’s light and easy, lifting some of the weight that’s been pressing down on me.
‘Do you know what your element is, yet?’ I ask.
He nods. ‘It’s air. I can sense it in here.’ He taps his sternum twice. My own hand itches to raise mine but I know all I’ll feel is emptiness. It’s a depleting sensation. Like pressing your hand to your chest to find your heart isn’t beating.
There are three elements that our people possess.
Air, water, fire. Centuries ago, when our founding Stars fell from the sky and shared their gifts with the humans living in Valmora, they passed on the ability to wield these elements.
Molochītis shared his ability to wield fire.
Achātēs gave his people the magic of air wielding.
And Opalus gifted her people with the element of water.
Each hoping in doing so, their people would prosper and survive even after they were no longer alive.
Over time, the three populations the Stars created began to procreate, they built lives, a new civilisation. New rules. But ultimately, everything still came down to one thing. Magic.
I only know what my parents have taught me about the war and how it began, but our magic, the crystals our people mine to enhance their power, it all goes toward the war.
We are born. We are taught to wield. We train, then we serve and only after we serve, are we afforded the chance to build families and a life for ourselves.
But we’re taught from birth to put Valmora first. The Stars left us with their mess.
The Veil. The moment we give up, the moment we stop fighting …
we lose. So, as I sit here on the grass, in my first Elemental Magic class at Valmora Academy, knowing I don’t possess magic and that there’s nothing to feel when I press my hand to my hollow chest, I already feel like I’ve failed my country.
‘What does it feel like?’ I ask, uncrossing my legs and bringing my knees to my chest.
Xavier bites his lower lip as he thinks for a moment.
‘It feels like … pressure. It’s not there all the time, which is why it’s so difficult for me to bring it out.
But sometimes, when I’m angry or experiencing a deep emotion, it builds to the point where I feel like there’s a hurricane swirling inside my chest.’
I frown. ‘That sounds painful.’
‘Pain I can deal with. Pain I’m used to.
I’ve felt it all my life, Aria. What I can’t handle is the lack of control I feel when it builds in my chest like that.
It drives me crazy knowing I can’t let it out.
It’s just … stuck in there.’ A self-deprecating laugh falls from his lips. ‘I’ve never told anyone that before.’
I offer him a soft smile. My skin warms seeing the trust dancing in his blue eyes. ‘Why not?’
His shoulders lift in a shrug. ‘I guess it’s hard to share something like that when you’re surrounded by people who wouldn’t understand.
My entire life I’ve watched as my parents, my cousins, even my grandparents wielded fire like it was the breath leaving their lungs.
Every Davis for the past century has been a fire wielder. ’
‘That’s some crazy genetics. So, you’re the only one who has air as their element?’
‘That I know of, yeah.’ His throat bobs.
I have the urge to leap forward and wrap my arms around his shoulders.
I sympathise with him. Stars, I understand what that pressure feels like.
Lukas left me big shoes to fill and when it was evident I couldn’t measure up to his skill set, my parents – mainly my father – began to treat me differently.
‘You have no idea how relieved I was when I didn’t get in. I almost started laughing right there in front of Malachite’s gate. It felt like the best “screw you” to my family. They all wanted me in the Warrior Unit.’
My gaze falls to his arms, hidden behind his grey long sleeves. A tightness clogs my throat as I dare to ask my next question. ‘H-how old were you when they first …’ I can’t even finish it. I’m almost too scared to know the answer, but he offers it anyway.
‘Seven.’
My eyes fill with hot tears. Fuck. He was only a little boy.
I don’t hold myself back this time. I let go of the tight grip I have around my legs and let them drop. Then propel myself forward, not caring a single bit if everyone sees as I wrap my arms around his neck and hug Xavier tightly.
He smells like parchment and the crisp breeze that coasts over the cliffs near the seaside. ‘I’m so sorry, Xavier. I’m sorry that your family doesn’t see how incredible you are.’ His arms squeeze me back with a fierceness I’m not ready for. My chest constricts. ‘I’m sorry they hurt you.’
His heavy exhale warms my neck and shoulder. ‘Don’t cry, Aria. It’s okay.’
Slowly, I pull back sitting on my heels and look at him.
I take in his soft auburn hair, the eyes like crystal blue water that hold so much within them.
My eyes fall to the easy smile he plasters to his face and finally I lean back enough to look down at his chest, right where he said it hurts sometimes.