Chapter 4
Chapter
Four
The whirl of metal on metal sounds all around us, echoing through the large house.
“It’s automatic blinds,” I tell Antonio. “They all go down right around sunrise and go back up after the sun sets.”
“Interesting,” he says, turning and looking out the window. “There’s already a bit of daylight.”
“Yeah,” I reply with a nod, feeling a little internal battle. Do I share the info Xavier has told me that the hunters didn’t know before? I suppose Antonio will find out. “Older vamps like Theo and Xavier can handle a little dim light with no issues.”
“That’s, uh, kind of terrifying.”
I shrug. “You don’t have to be afraid of them. Well,” I go on and smirk. “Unless you make them mad. Then be terrified.”
“Reassuring, Wren, very reassuring.”
We stare at each other for a few seconds before Antonio sighs and sits on the edge of the bed, looking around the room.
I’ve passed by many times, but I haven’t really gone in here.
The room looks straight off someone’s Pinterest board, with high-end detail and rich painted wood paneling on the ceiling.
“Other than the fact your soul belongs to a demon for the time being,” he begins. “You seem…okay.”
“I guess I am.” I shrug again. “I mean, I am. I never would have thought things would go the way they did, but, uh, hey. That’s life, right?”
“He treats you well?”
“Yeah. He does,” I reply, unable to help my smile when I think of Xavier.
“I never thought being forced to marry a vampire mob boss would work out in my favor, yet here I am.” I chuckle, shaking my head at how insane this all sounds.
“I’m part of the family, and they take family seriously.
You don’t just have to be born into it with them. ”
My words hang heavy in the air, creating an awkward silence. I wasn’t born a Russo and was reminded of it every single day.
Toni’s brows push together and he drops his gaze, guilt on his face. “We thought for sure you’d run away.”
“I did, too,” I confess and feel the truth start to bubble up inside me.
“I had nowhere to go and no one to run to and I didn’t want to believe it because that was scarier than being here.
” I cast my eyes down, still able to feel the hurt.
There’s relief in having said those words out loud, but the truth sits on me, weighing me down with shame.
Because I can’t deny it anymore: if I left, I would be forced to confront the fact that I was utterly alone and that in itself was scarier for me to deal with than being brought here against my will.
I want to believe there was some part of me that sensed the goodness in Xavier, the gentle part of him that only comes out when I’m around.
And maybe I did. Maybe there really is some sort of karmic soul connection between the two of us, but I also need to face my biggest fear: there is no place for me, I will never fit in, I will never be enough to be fully wanted.
It’s happened a few times, almost fitting in.
I was held at arm’s length. Welcomed into a relationship, but not the family.
I was part of an elite circle of hunters, but not one of them.
My differences made me stronger, made me who I am, but it kept the little voice in the back of my head questioning if I am enough.
“I’m really sorry, Wren.”
“Don’t be,” I say and look back at Antonio.
“I am,” he presses. “I’m your big brother. I should have done something.”
“In hindsight, I’m really glad you didn’t.” I smile. “I wouldn’t be Mrs. Malus.”
“God, that’s so weird. You’re an old married woman now.”
“I’m still younger than you. And a lot younger than my husband.”
Antonio snickers and lets out a breath. “What do you do all day?”
“Now…kinda whatever I want. Just a couple days ago, I was hanging out with my werewolf friend buying drugs.”
Antonio raises an eyebrow. “I won’t judge.”
“It was to track down the demon, which reminds me, I should probably go to Tent City and see the damage.”
“And do what, Wren?” he questions, being the voice of reason.
“We already know who the demon is, what the demon wants, and we know that a bunch of lower-level demons escaped while the portal was open. If anything, you need to lay low and figure out where the sigil is so we can save your ass—again.” He winks when he says that last part.
We all know I’ve saved his ass more times than he can count.
The door opens and Theo appears at the threshold. “I like him. Maybe having him around won’t be the thorn in my side I thought it would be.”
“Who says I’m sticking around?” he quickly fires back.
Theo gives him an are you fucking stupid look. “Where are you going to go? The hunters thinking you’re dead is going to work in our favor.” He lets out an annoyed huff. “Besides, it seems you’re qualified to babysit my sister in law.”
“Fuck you, Theo,” I retort.
“You wish you could,” he snaps back. “But I don’t think my brother would be too pleased.”
“I wish I could stake you.”
“That makes two of us,” he mutters.
Xavier appears behind him. “You can stab him in the heart with a dagger. It won’t kill him yet, but it's rather satisfying.”
“You would know,” Theo huffs and zooms away.
“Wren,” Xavier says, eyes meeting mine and the second our gazes meet, the storm within me calms. “How are you feeling?”
“Mentally or physically?”
Xavier comes into the room and puts his hands on my waist. “Both.”
“I’m still tired. I feel hungover. And, um, I think I need a giant poster board to write out a list of all the things we need to deal with because I can’t keep track.”
“I’ll keep track of you. Dr. Patel wants you to take antibiotics so your hand doesn’t get infected.”
“He was here?” I wrinkle my nose. “I must have really passed out since I didn’t even wake up when someone re-bandaged my hand.”
“You did,” Xavier tells me and slowly runs his fingers up my waist before he gently takes my left hand in his. “There has to be some sort of spell you can do to speed up healing.”
“Maybe,” I say with a shrug. “But I am human.”
“So fragile,” he teases, but there is truth to his words.
Humans are fragile. We break and our skin tears and we get sick and it can take a while to heal.
I can’t snap my brother’s neck when he annoys me just to get a few moments of peace.
“Go back to bed. When Alan gets here, I’ll have him make you breakfast.”
“Who’s Alan?” Antonio asks.
“The house chef,” Xavier answers him.
“You have a chef?” Antonio looks at Xavier dubiously. “You don’t eat.”
“Wren does,” Xavier answers. “So do you. He will make whatever you want.”
“Okay then.”
Xavier lets go of my left hand and takes my right. The little scab from where the demonic quill poked me doesn’t bother me at all.
“Am I free to walk around?” Antonio asks. “Or will I set off alarms or something?”
“You can do what you wish,” Xavier tells him. “I trust you’ll make wise choices.”
That wasn’t the response Antonio wanted to hear, and I recognize the struggle by the confusion on his face.
In his mind, the Malus vampires are bad.
It’s simple and black and white. I’ll be the first to tell you that Xavier and Theo have killed more people—and vampires—than I’d be able to count, but they’re not evil.
The Malus vampires are complex. They care about each other.
They’re smart and utterly human in many ways, which challenges what the Order has drilled into every hunter’s head.
It’s something Leo and I challenged, but not something Antonio ever allowed himself to even second-guess.
He’s always been an exemplary hunter: following orders, pledging his loyalty and really believing he was doing the right thing.
“Watch out for Devon,” I add. “Not that he’s going to hurt you or anything. He’s uh, just, uh, new to this.”
“Mabel will keep an eye on him,” Xavier tells me so I don’t worry. He looks at Antonio. “She’s going to invite you to tea. You are going.”
“Uh, okay,” Antonio replies. “Sounds nice.”
“Enjoy,” I tell him and then go down the hall with Xavier. He closes the bedroom door as soon as we’re inside and pulls me to him. This is the first time we’ve been alone since everything went down.
“What the fuck were you thinking, Wren?” he whispers, burying his face into my neck. “You made a deal with a demon.”
“I know what I did,” I reply back, leaning away just enough to look into his blue eyes. “And I know what I have to do.”
“What do you have to do?”
I swallow hard, hating the fear in my eyes.
This isn’t something he can physically beat up.
He can’t punch his hand through the demon’s chest and pull out its heart and we walk away, calling it a day.
This demon has power, lots of it. There’s a reason it was bound to a sigil and not killed in the first place.
“Find the sigil, break it, and then kill the demon.”
“Sounds so simple.”
“Hah. Right?”
He pushes my hair back and kisses me. Warmth floods my body and my hands go to his hips, pulling his body against mine.
I let out a breath and melt against him.
Xavier picks me up and carries me to the bed, laying me down and moving on top of me.
I widen my legs, welcoming him in between.
He kisses me again, soft and gentle at first.
“I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe, Wren.”
“I know you will,” I tell him, reaching up and cupping his face, careful with my injured hand.
“I mean it,” he says between kisses and then lifts his head so he can look at me. “Whatever it takes.”
“I know,” I repeat. “But I don’t think you know how much I’ve wanted this…
someone who will save me.” My voice is quiet yet full of emotion.
Isn’t that what we all want? To be saved?
To have someone who loves us enough to come to our rescue when we need it most because that’s what we would do for them.
“I’m not the knight in shining armor you dreamed about saving you, Wren. I am the villain, and nothing will change that.”
“I don’t want a knight in shining armor because I am no damsel in distress. I want someone who will go to the ends of the earth for me because the thought of not being together is more painful than anything he has to do to keep me.”
“Someone like that will cross lines that can’t be uncrossed.”
“Then we’ll cross them together.”
He kisses me again, this time with more passion than ever before. My heart swells in my chest and I can’t get close enough to him.
“Xavier,” I breathe, lips brushing against his as I mumble his name.
He groans in response and moves down, fingers hooking inside the waistband of the PJ pants I put on.
In a swift movement, he pulls them down, positioning his head between my legs.
My body shudders in anticipation and I glance down at him, lips parting as his mouth touches my most sensitive parts.
He lifts his head so I can watch him draw his fangs. Then he goes back to me, tongue lashing against my clit. A moan escapes me and I move one hand to the mattress, twisting the comforter into a ball in my fist and he takes me into his mouth, licking and sucking at the same time.
Holy shit, it feels so damn good. My eyes fall shut and pleasure winds within me, but this time, it’s mixed with something else, and it enhances everything a million times.
I’ve been in some scary situations before.
I’ve dealt with demons and darkness not knowing how I’d get out.
And yes, I had the Order to back me up, but it was more out of obligation than anything else.
It’s different with Xavier. He will do whatever it takes to keep me safe and knowing I’ve finally found someone who is willing to put it all on the line for the ones they love fills the void inside me.
Knowing I’m close to coming, Xavier pushes a finger inside me, pressing against my inner walls.
My entire body tenses and I suck in a breath, holding it as the orgasm ripples through me.
I cry out in pleasure, turning my head to the side as I writhe against him.
He doesn’t let up and the climax is so intense my ears ring as I arch my back.
He holds me to him and turns his head, fangs sinking into the tender flesh of my inner thigh.
The pain mixes with the pleasure and I slit my eyes open, watching him drink from me.
It’s the strangest feeling, as it both hurts and feels good at the same time, and knowing that it’s my blood giving him strength makes me feel all the more close to him.
Careful not to drink too much, Xavier licks the little bite wounds and then puts his fingers over them, applying just enough pressure to help stop the bleeding.
My heart is racing and I lie there, panting, as we wait a short moment for the bleeding to stop.
Then he moves back up to me, and I wipe a smear of my blood off of his face.
“I love you,” I whisper to him and he just growls in response, burying his face in my neck.
His fangs scrape against me as he wraps his arms around me, holding me tightly against his body.
In a swift movement, he rolls over, bringing me on top so I’m straddling him.
I lean down and kiss him, primal passion fueling us as I taste my blood on his lips.
I inch down and undo the button of his pants.
It only takes a few seconds to strip him of his clothes.
Sitting back on my heels, I slowly take my shirt off, watching him as I strip down, baring my naked body for only him to see.
Unable to be patient any longer, Xavier reaches down and pulls me up.
I widen my legs and sink down on his cock, moaning as I take him inside me.
My hands land on his firm chest and he grips my waist, bucking his hips along with my movements.
It doesn’t take me long to come again, and this time, he comes along with me.
I fall forward, panting as I feel his cock pulse inside me.
We stay tangled together for a moment and then Xavier carefully lays me down next to him.
I force myself to get up and use the bathroom before I doze off.
“Come to bed,” Xavier tells me when I come back from the bathroom. He’s under the covers, still naked, and there is nothing in this entire world that I want right now more than to snuggle up next to my husband and fall asleep, forgetting about everything bad, if just for a mere few hours.
Because a few hours of peace—I fear—is all I’m going to get.