Chapter 14 #2
“I don’t know,” I sigh, and guilt rises up inside of me.
I still haven’t told anyone about Marie and the witches and I shouldn’t feel bad.
I’m not doing anything wrong…right? I’m more than allowed to make friends and right now, she seems pretty harmless and possibly even helpful.
There’s not enough to tell anyway, so it makes sense to keep it to myself and yes, I know I’m rationalizing this whole situation.
“I’ve been slacking on my training. Let’s run. ”
“We don’t have running clothes,” Leo tries.
“Nice try,” I tell him. “I’ll get you something.
” Leo, Antonio, and Devon are all roughly the same size, and there never seems to be a shortage of clothes in this house.
I go upstairs, wave to Mabel as I pass by her room, and change into workout clothes myself and then bring some down for my brothers.
“I really don’t feel like fucking running,” Leo complains when we get out into the later afternoon heat and start down the driveway.
“Did you drink yourself stupid?” Antonio asks, flicking Leo on the back of the head. “Being outside means the vamps can’t hear us anymore.”
“Oh, right.” Leo blinks a few times and takes a deep breath. “I thought you trusted them, Wren.”
“I do,” I counter, stretching my arms out as we walk.
“But I can still enjoy a walk without being overheard.” I raise my eyebrows, giving him a pointed look.
“And right now, I need to know if you knew anything about the Order agreeing to keep hunters from being stationed permanently in eastern North Carolina.”
Antonio shakes his head. “Never heard anything, but I always wondered why. I joked a few times about being relocated to the coast and it wasn’t met with humor—at all. Could explain why.”
“Why would the Order keep hunters out of a certain area?” Leo questions and at first I think he’s going back to being Team Order but thankfully I see the question on his face. “It would go against everything they stand for.”
“Right,” I say with a shrug. We make it to the road and start jogging.
“We know they made a deal with Xavier,” Antonio starts. “And the demon. They’re self-serving.”
“And corrupt,” Leo adds. “Makes you wonder what else they have done.”
We jog maybe half a mile before Antonio asks me, “Why did you bring up hunters in the eastern part of the state?”
I hesitate, hating how torn I feel. It would be so much easier to tell them everything and have them be on my side. And it would be so much easier if this were black and white. Order equals bad. Vampires are equally good.
But it’s not like that.
The Order has a lot of hateful, racist and sexist members.
They hate anyone who’s different and use it as an excuse to kill.
Not every single person in the Order feels that way, and if they’ve been raised to believe that, is it really their fault?
Isn’t ignorance and hate a cycle that gets perpetuated because of lack of education?
Someone has to stop the cycle, but if you lack the intelligence to have free thinking, are you a victim or an abuser?
It’s too complicated, and all I know right now is that innocent hunters will die unless we intervene. But how—I have no fucking idea.
“It’s not just vampires who don’t want them here,” I say, going with a less is more approach. “There are other supernatural beings who benefited from not being hunted. And they look to Xavier to keep them safe.”
Leo slows, looking at me with wide eyes. “So the whole supernatural mafia rumor is true? The vamps and the werewolves have teamed up?”
Both my brothers slow their pace, looking at me.
“Xavier keeps the peace in this area not just between vampires and hunters, but between, well, everyone. You can look at the crime stats,” I say, remembering what Delphi had told me.
“Human on human crime is still much higher than vampire on human and it’s significantly gone down since Xavier has come back to the city.
You know he and his brothers pretty much founded this area?
They made it possible for the humans who built this city to, well, build it. ”
“It’s so weird your husband is like a billion years old,” Leo jokes and some of the tension leaves me. I miss the version of him I could trust. Not just with my life, but with my thoughts and feelings, too.
“Hey, at least he’s got the experience to back it up.”
“Gross, Wren,” they both say at the same time.
“So hunters are moving toward the coast,” Leo says, breathing heavily as we continue our run. “I don’t think your impulsive hubby is going to like it. Or Theo. He seems almost more unhinged.”
“Theo is more impulsive and very dedicated to upholding the family name. He acts then thinks. Xavier is calculated,” I say, deciding to leave out the part about how I once watched Xavier calmly rip the heart out of another vampire just for trying to hit on me.
Or that one time he stabbed a fork all the way through someone’s hand, pinning it to the table, because he insulted me.
The way Xavier murders with poise is terrifying.
You would never see it coming. You could sit down at a fancy restaurant, be nearly through your five courses and think things are going great and then, without warning, his hand will be inside your chest, fingers squeezing the literal life out of your heart.
He’ll pull it out quickly and hold it in front of you knowing you’ll get a second or two to look at your own beating heart in terror before bringing it to his mouth and sucking the blood out of the aorta like it’s a juice box.
And he would do it all with his sleeves rolled up so he wouldn’t get his designer shirt bloody.
“Whatever is going on,” I continue. “The Order is making a mistake going up against the Maluses. It would be nice to be a step ahead and stop them before anyone has to get hurt. But I would say that’s wishful thinking.”
“I really hate to say this again, Wren,” Antonio starts, looking at me as he picks up the pace again. “I think we need Ryder. You guys seem to be able to get along.”
“Getting along was never the issue,” I reply honestly.
“We always got along.” I no longer feel the need to get into it.
I really do think, at his core, Ryder is a good person.
What happened between us was horrible and tragic and, yeah, could have been avoided if he had any semblance of a spine.
He lied right to my face, promised me safety and love and a life together.
And that was wrong. It was mean. It hurt so much to have everything ripped out from underneath me like I meant nothing.
But now, I see things clearly and it also hurts him. He’s the one who has to live with what he did, and not only does he have to live with the pain of losing the person he loved, but he will forever have to live with the fact that he was a coward.
He couldn’t stand up for himself.
“Then what’s the problem?” Leo asks, already sounding a little out of breath. Running with a hangover is no joke. “You seem like you’ve forgiven him.”
“I have,” I reply. “It’ll be fine.” I force a smile and pick up the pace. The issue isn’t me at all. I really have forgiven Ryder. If I’m being totally honest, I feel bad for him too. But he hurt me, and once Xavier finds out everything that happened, he’ll want to hurt him too.