Chapter 15
CHAPTER 15
MALO
I throw off my jacket, slump down on to the bed, and let out a growl of irritation at myself.
I can’t believe I’ve just agreed to do that for her. To get Maria’s father out of the mess he’s in right now. It’s a stupid idea, I’m sure of it, and I knew it from the moment I agreed to it, but there was something about the way she looked at me, with such hope in her eyes, that made it impossible for me to deny her, even though all of my good sense was telling me not to agree to it.
But, with that red mark on her cheek, with that look in her eyes, I know I would have given in at one point or another. I know what it’s like to have to live without your parents, and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, whatever their age. Let alone the horror that her father is being put through, out there somewhere in Monterrey, being forced to work against his will on a drug that will no doubt soon be flooding the streets and creating even more addicts than there already are.
I’d just promised Maria I’d help her, when she was already asking me what she could do to help me with my newfound mission to get her father out of the cartel’s grasp. She filled me in on everything she knew about where he was being held captive, everything she could remember from the brief video she’d seen, but I doubt it’s enough to go on yet or if he’s even still there. It’s going to be like searching for a needle in a haystack, finding out where they’re holding him, and I doubt Beast is going to give me the go-ahead to use our resources to smoke him out.
We’ve already got enough to take care of in the city as it is, and it’s going to be even more intense now that Las Rosas Negras think we’re working with new allies to take them down. They’ll likely have the compound staked out, under their watchful eye twenty-four-seven to make sure we don’t get the jump on them, and I really don’t want to use any of our men to go down to Mexico right now, not when it could leave this place exposed.
Shit! I can’t believe I’ve agreed to this. But I’m not the kind of man who goes back on his promises, let alone to a woman. I know she’s relying on me, and I’m pissed that I didn’t just tell her no. There’s no damn way we can do this, we’re too busy, and the stakes are too high to waste resources on getting her father out of there when it doesn’t seem like he’s in any immediate physical danger. They need to keep him alive, at least for now, so we should be focused on other things.
But this is about more than just her father, at least for me. God only knows how much I’ve let that cartel harm people around me. When I think about Harley, everything she went through, I still feel that sickening twist of guilt deep down in my gut. If I had just been able to get her out of there sooner, she would never have…
I push those thoughts down. I can’t let myself get lost in the guilt. It’s no good to me, a useless emotion. She’s out now, and that’s what matters, on her way to healing after all the harm that’s been done to her. And, if I play my cards right, maybe I can get Maria’s father out too.
I rise to my feet and head over to the bathroom, splashing some water on my face to clear my head before I go and talk to Beast. In the trashcan, there is the small baggie I swiped from the crackhouse the other day. For a moment, I feel a pang of want, wishing there was something in there that I could use, but I push it down at once. I’m better with my head clear, not lost to a high I can’t control, and I know if I’m going to convince Beast I can take this on, I’m going to need to be stone-cold sober.
Sometimes, I miss the old days of just letting my addiction take hold of me, letting my need for an escape to run my life. There’s something almost… comforting about it, about how it controls you. There are no other priorities in your entire life when you want to feel that release. All you can think about is what it’s going to take to get the next hit, and then the next, the next, and the next. You don’t consider the consequences, your responsibilities.
But Beast pulled me out of that, and I know he would never forgive me if I went ahead and let myself get sucked back into it again, not after I’ve worked so hard to get loose from it’s grip. The other night was nothing more than a slip-up, and I’m not going to let it take control of me again.
I straighten my shoulders and make my way to Beast’s office, where he’s sitting with his feet on the desk, frowning as he reads a message on his phone. I knock on the door, and he looks up.
“Malo.” He gestures for me to come in. I step inside, already figuring out how best to phrase this request. I doubt he’s going to take it well. He’s already got enough on his mind without me asking for permission to shoot off down to Mexico for a needlessly dangerous mission, all to free a man we barely even know. He might like Maria and appreciate her help, but this is a whole other level.
I push the door shut behind me, not wanting anyone else to overhear this. I don’t want anyone else to have any comments on how stupid this is, not knowing how pissed Beast is going to be as it stands.
“What’s up?” Beast asks, planting his feet on the ground and eyeing me. I sink into the chair opposite him, mind racing, trying to figure out some way to convince him this is important.
“I need to go to Mexico,” I tell him, the words escaping my lips before I can stop them.
He cocks an eyebrow. “For what?” he asks, coolly.
“It’s for Maria’s father,” I explain. “The cartel is holding him down there, working on coming up with this new drug they can use to sell to people out here. She wants him out. And I don’t think she’s going to be able to focus on what we need her to do unless we free him.”
Beast lets out a long exhale through his nose, and I can see he’s genuinely considering this. That’s part of what makes him a good leader—that he never brushes off a suggestion, no matter how crazy or strange it might seem on the surface.
“Malo,” he says, his voice suddenly dropping into a sharp coldness. “You better be fucking kidding me.”
“I know. Lo se,” I reply, raising my hands. I see him glower at me, and he’s right to be mad, it’s not exactly as though I’ve got a good reason for this.
“You better have a good reason for coming to me with this,” he warns.
I scramble to come up with something. I can’t just tell him that it was the look in her eyes that convinced me. That I would have done anything to make her feel better in that moment, even if it included promising things I knew I would never be able to bring to reality.
I sigh. I know I need to be honest with him. If there’s one thing Beast appreciates, it’s honesty, I know better than to try and bullshit him into believing something I don’t even have much trust in myself.
“I want to help her,” I admit to him, finally. “I know how it sounds—I know she was working against us not that long ago, but she’s come to us for help now, and I want to do what I can to make that right. She’s torn up about what’s going on with her father—says he’s some big-shot chemist, mostly in medicine, and he’s stuck trying to turn out new product for the cartel. They’ve been showing her video of him, working with a gun to his head, and she can’t handle it. She’s not used to this world. She needs help if she’s going to be able to keep her focus on what matters here.”
“And you think that means I should give you permission to go running off down to Mexico?” he asks, incredulous.
“I get it, it’s crazy,” I reply, lifting my hands up, conceding the point. “But we need her able to focus, and she’s not going to be able to do that if she’s worried about what’s happening with her father. We get him back to the city, where we can keep an eye on him, then she’s going to be able to keep her attention on what we need her to do.”
Beast drums his fingers on the table, considering it. I’m starting to convince him. I keep talking, trying to fill in the gaps in his head.
“And, if he’s making new product for them, we need to stop that from getting out here,” I point out. “The more addicts they have begging them for a fix, the more people they have to use against us, right?”
Beast nods, slowly. He knows I’m right. An addict desperate for a hit will do anything they can to get it, and if that means throwing themselves in the line of fire to keep us away from the cartel, a lot of them might be willing to do it. We need to whittle down people willing to ally themselves with the cartel, and cutting off their supply chain before it even gets started is one way to make that happen.
“Plus, Maria already told that Rayo guy that we’re working with the Cafarellis,” I remind him. “They’re going to be distracted here in Houston, trying to keep a lid on all of that, right?”
“Good point,” he replies, his eyes narrowing as he considers it.
“If we can hit one of their compounds, we might be able to shake them up, get them to scatter their forces,” I continue. “And maybe pick up some information about what they’re planning next.”
I hold my breath as I wait for him to reply. I’ve pled my case, and I know it’s a good one, but this mission is still crazy enough that he could turn me down without a second thought.
Instead, he grits his teeth, and lifts his chin as he eyes me.
“You think you can handle something like this?” he asks.
I nod at once. “I wouldn’t even be here if I didn’t think I could,” I promise him. “I can handle it. You can trust me.”
He’s had plenty of reason not to, in the past, and I wonder if Sin has said anything to him about me using again. I wouldn’t be surprised if Beast was the one who clocked my high in the first place, noticing me being out-of-sorts the night after my binge, and he sent Sin to talk to me about it so we could keep it low-key. But I hope I’ve proven myself enough to him over the years for him to let me take this on, no matter how crazy it seems.
“You’re not going alone,” he replies.
“I could?—”
“You need another King with you,” he remarks, tapping his fingers on the desk as he ponders on who the best candidate might be. “Can’t spare too many, but… talk to Blue. Bring him with you. He’s good with stealth, and you’ll need that if you’re going to get into one of their compounds.”
I nod. Blue’s a good person to have on your side, no matter what the occasion, but the fact that Beast is willing to spare him for this particular mission means he’s taking it seriously. He must know what an important asset Maria is to us, and how vital it is that we keep her on our side. Getting her father back will put her in debt to us for life, and she’ll be willing to do anything to make sure she gets us everything we need.
“We need to feed the Rosas more information before we do anything else,” he replies. “Draw them out of their hiding places, get them out in the open. How long ’til she can meet with Rayo again, give him some more information?”
“I’ll talk to her about it,” I reply. “See what he’s been saying to her.”
Beast nods sharply, and then rises to his feet. His eyes lock on to mine, and I can tell he’s trying to read into my expression right now—to figure out if I’m actually capable of this, or if I’m about to walk into a mess I can’t handle.
“You look out for yourself, Malo,” he warns me. “Don’t let any woman throw you off your game. You hear me?”
“Si, boss,” I reply. But the truth is, at the back of my mind, I’m already worried that this girl has thrown me off my game, and that I can’t say no to her. No matter how stupid a mess she might get me into.
Because when she hits me with those gorgeous eyes, I know I can’t turn her down.