Chapter 3
Brett flicked on the light, dropped his keys into the dish in the foyer, then strode into the kitchen ahead of me.
I set my purse down by his keys and then lingered at the door, nervous, which was ridiculous.
I’d been to his apartment a thousand times and crashed in his spare bedroom so often that I had a toothbrush in the bathroom.
He’d invited me to move in officially on more than one occasion, and I’d always consider it until I remembered that there was no way I could afford half of the nine grand that he paid per month for a luxury location in Koreatown with views of the Hudson.
Sure, he’d said I didn’t need to pay that much, but no. It was one thing to take advantage of my sister and her rich husband. It was an entirely different thing to let Brett carry me financially.
And there was the other reason that kept me from adding my name to the lease—I was afraid it would be that much easier to end up tangled in his sheets.
I turned my head to look into his bedroom, clearly visible from the foyer.
His door was only slightly ajar, but I could see enough of the bed to know he’d made it this morning, as always.
The gray duvet was tucked in with tight military corners, a tie laid out on top, and I could vividly imagine the one he wore tonight had once been laid next to it while he decided which to wear—he’d chosen the better.
It was an ordinary glimpse of a man I knew very well, and though it offered no new knowledge of him, it made my pulse race. I felt like a voyeur, spying on a part of his life that I hadn’t been invited into.
I wanted to be invited in.
I wanted to mess up those sheets.
I wanted to be tied up with that tie.
Oh my God, I was terrible. We were best friends, and thinking naughty thoughts about him was super terrible.
Maybe he’ll spank me for it…
Yeah, right. Super nice Brett Sebastian was probably not nasty under the covers. It didn’t stop me from wanting to find out.
“Are you hungry?” Brett called from the kitchen.
Obviously, I needed to tell him no, call it a night, and walk right past him to the second bedroom beyond.
Somehow I ended up leaning against the counter behind him as he poked around in the fridge.
“There you are,” he said, slightly surprised to see me when he turned around. “Hungry?”
I shook my head.
Apparently he wasn’t either, because all he removed from the fridge was a bottle of sparkling water before he shut the door and leaned against it, mirroring my stance. He opened the cap and took a swallow then handed it out toward me. “Thirsty?”
I shook my head again.
He recapped the water and put it on the counter beside him. Then he returned his gaze to me. It was heavier than it had ever felt before, a weight that I impulsively wanted to shrug off, but instead I held it, and the longer I held it, the heavier it got. The warmer I got. The faster my heart got.
“Didn’t want to deal with Avery tonight?” His voice was deep and sultry, and I wondered if he meant for it to come out that way or if he was as out-of-control as I was right now.
I wondered why he’d even asked the question, because he knew why I’d asked him to bring me home tonight. The tension between us right now was undeniable, as it often was. The only reason it hadn’t gone further before was because one of us—usually me—shut it down before it got to that point.
And now we were intensely staring at each other, daring each other to look away like a game of chicken. It wasn’t going to be me. Would it be him?
When I didn’t respond to him, he asked a different question. A bolder question. “Is this because of Scott?”
A strange ache pierced through my ribs because yes, partly, but admitting that would end whatever this was before it got started.
But also because no, I was not here because of Scott, and the reasons that were not Scott far outweighed the reasons that were.
Just, explaining what those reasons were to myself was hard enough, let alone to him.
So instead of answering in words, I pushed off the counter, stepped forward, and kissed him.
He allowed me to, at first. Let me gently wrap my mouth around his bottom lip and kiss it once. Twice.
Then he just as gently—reluctantly—pulled away.
Sort of.
His mouth no longer touched my lips, but his forehead was pressed against mine, and his hands had found their way to my hips. “What are you doing, Eden?”
I splayed my hands over his chest. Worked open the button of his jacket and moved underneath where I could feel his body heat through his shirt and the thump, thump, thump of his heart under my palm. “You can’t tell?”
His lips moved forward, and I thought he was going to kiss me this time, but instead, he danced them around mine. His willpower was holding on by a string.
I thought about that—how somewhere inside him, there was a part of his brain throwing up caution signs and how a good friend would try to be strong for him when he couldn’t be strong for himself.
I could be strong.
But I didn’t want to be a good friend at the moment. “You haven’t thought about it?” I asked as I whispered my mouth against his.
“I’ve thought about it.”
I moved my hand down his abdomen and over the front of his pants where a definite bulge was forming.
“How much?” I wanted to hear him say it, but I wanted him to acknowledge that he wanted me for himself. So he’d know this was his choice as much as mine.
He stole a quick kiss, as if he couldn’t help himself. Fast as it was, I’d felt his tongue swipe across my lip. “A lot.”
My breath picked up at his admission, and the space between my legs felt suddenly drenched. I kissed him again, and this time his tongue was more dominant, sliding in next to mine. Stroking me. Tasting me.
The bulge under my palm grew bigger and more tempting, and when I cupped my hand around it, exploring the definition of his cock, he groaned.
I broke our kiss off in surprise. “Fuck, Brett. This is what you’ve been hiding all this time?” I’d tried not to think too much about his anatomy over the years, and if I had, I would never have imagined he was sporting a cock this size. Long and thick, not too big, but just on the brink.
At least, that’s what I was gathering from the feel of it. “Please, oh please, you have to let me see this monster.”
He smiled against my mouth. Kissed me again, deeper, longer.
Then groaned again, and it didn’t sound like he’d groaned because I was working his cock this time—though I definitely still was—but rather it was the kind of groan that said he was still trying to think with his rational brain, and his rational brain wasn’t one hundred percent on board.
“Eden, Eden, Eden,” he sighed, bringing his forehead back to mine.
“Do you want me to beg?” It was playful, but I would if he wanted me to. I was about to even if he didn’t want me to.
He chuckled. “Maybe.”
While his head was hesitating, his hands weren’t.
One had made its way under my dress, and before I could start in on the pleading, his fingers had found my pussy when apparently he’d been expecting something else, because he jerked back, gathered my skirt up so he could see what was underneath, and groaned yet again.
“You’ve been walking around with no panties all night? Fuck, Eden.”
It wasn’t a good time to mention they’d only been missing since Scott had taken them for a souvenir.
I couldn’t have mentioned it anyway because he dragged a finger through my pussy lips and up to my clit, and oh my God, the spark of electricity that surged through me at his touch could have lit up the Empire State Building. I didn’t even recognize the sound that escaped my throat.
“You keep it bare for him?” he asked, his voice raw.
He was thinking about Scott anyway, it appeared. That jagged pain in my ribs returned. The last person I wanted Brett to be thinking about right now was his cousin. Scott was the last person I wanted to be thinking about.
But it seemed Brett didn’t really care about the answer because he ravished my mouth with his, kissing me greedily as his hand continued to stroke my pussy.
Not to be outdone, I rubbed his cock up and down over his pants with increased pressure.
He was so fucking big, and I could swear he was getting even bigger as he ground against my hand, and it scared me and delighted me to think that it was very likely that that huge cock would be inside of me before the night was over.
Scared me and delighted me not because I was worried about his size, but because the idea of Brett being inside of me like that—when he was already inside of me in so many other ways—felt so incredibly Big and Right.
As much as I’d ever chased after other men, I could honestly say at that moment that I had never wanted anything in my life as much as I wanted Brett Sebastian.
All of a sudden, he broke the kiss. His hand came off my pussy and yanked mine off his cock. He held my wrist in the air and met my gaze head on.
“I told you I’ll beg,” I said before he could say he was putting an end to this. “On my knees if you prefer.”
His green eyes went darker, if that was even possible. “Two things we need to get clear: nothing changes our friendship. Losing what we have is not worth however out-of-this-world fucking you will be, and I need you to promise that doesn’t change.”
“Never. We can handle this without letting it change anything.” I believed it as I said it, but I would have said anything for him to keep touching me. “What’s the second thing?”
He studied me, as if making sure we were really settled on the first thing before he went on to the second. Finally, he said, “The second thing is that I’m the one in charge.”
Before I knew what was happening, he had me flipped around and bent over the counter that had been behind me. My dress was pushed up around my waist, and I could feel his hot gaze on my backside.