Twenty-Five #4
“Fuck,” I cried. That ribbon of need was seconds away from coming undone. He seemed to sense it, too. He covered my mouth with his, and his tongue intertwined with mine. My fingers drove through his hair, and I pressed his forehead against mine as my breaths hit harder.
“Come for me, Edira. I want everyone to hear you scream my name. I want your whole world to shatter so you’ll never think of anyone else but me,” he said roughly into my ear.
His words were my undoing, and that bundle of need shattered into a thousand pieces as my climax ripped through me.
I screamed his name as he barreled deep inside me.
The pressure of his grip on my waist was everything.
He wrung every last drop of pleasure from me, and then he spilled himself into me with a loud groan.
Still, he kept moving. Slowly, gently, he lessened his thrusts as my limbs went weak and my body trembled from the sudden rush of ecstasy.
When the sounds of the room began to trickle back into awareness, I rounded my gaze back to him.
“You will be the death of me,” he murmured as he leaned forward. His nose ghosted beneath my collarbone, his breath warm against my chest. Gooseflesh rippled across my skin, and he let out a pleased sigh.
“I doubt that,” I said softly. I could hardly think with him still seated inside of me. “I’ll beat you to the grave.”
I didn’t know why I said it. My words were meant to be teasing, and yet there was an undercurrent of truth that couldn’t be ignored.
I wanted to live. Rorik had wanted me to live, too.
So much so that he was willing to die right alongside his family if it meant I could’ve gained a few extra years by not using my power.
Rorik stiffened as his gaze shot to mine. His words were soft. So . . . tender.
“I know.”
Desperation and desire collided in me with fervent demand, and I cupped either side of his face.
I wanted to memorize every emotion in that gaze.
Etch the cut of his jaw and slant of his lips into my mind so that I could carry his visage with me even if .
. . when I wouldn’t be around to see him any longer.
Fuck the plan. Fuck this being just sex. I wanted him. All of him. I would beg if I had to. I didn’t care about winning or losing anymore. I’d take any outcome so long as it ended with us intertwined.
I opened my mouth to say as much, but he placed a soft finger against my lips. “I think we played our part well enough. No more.”
“No more?” I rolled my hips for effect, but he gently slid out of me and redid his pants.
Hurt slammed through me with the force of a summer thunderstorm.
I had no right to be upset. I’d outlined the rules, and he’d complied.
But fuck, I couldn’t shake the pain. A single, damning tear gathered in the corner of my eye. Rorik spotted it instantly.
“Whatever you’re thinking—”
“Forget it,” I said with a weak smile as I sat up.
As quickly as I could, I draped my robe about my shoulders and tied the chain.
“We did what we had to, right?” I gestured to the hall, which had quieted as many Evers had slunk away with partners for the night.
Seville was nowhere to be found. Which meant my time with Rorik was up.
I bit down hard on my tongue to keep the errant sob from breaking free from my chest. A small part of me wondered if that’s why he never pressed for more.
Because a relationship with me would be too fleeting.
It probably wasn’t worth the effort. Why bother to get invested, to deal with my desperate heart, when he could just as easily find someone else?
Or, if he did want something lasting, there were plenty of his kind to choose from.
Someone who could spend immortality by his side.
“What’s going on in there?” He trailed a light finger across my temple.
“Nothing at all. Just tired,” I said.
I doubted I masked any of the hurt brewing in my chest. All I could hope was that he’d expect me to be exhausted. He said nothing as he helped me down from the table, but grimaced when I pulled my hand free of his.
“No need for pretenses, right?” I laughed. It was the hollowest sound I’d ever made.
“Right,” he muttered.
As we made our way back to our quarters, a cold wave of numbness poured over me from head to toe.
I couldn’t tell if that was the sudden depletion of the wine’s effects or the aftershock of what Rorik and I just shared.
Either way, it scalded with an icy pain that had me trembling, and I wrapped my arms tight around my stomach.
I wanted out. To be away. To be anywhere but here, in this manor with him.
But even as we made it to our suite and I shut the door to the room I shared with Seville, I couldn’t escape the agonizing pain twisting through our heartbond, tying me up in a web of confusion and leaving me in knots.
Somewhere through that gilded bond I could’ve sworn I felt his own despair, but I couldn’t let myself believe it.
Not when every time I tried to reach for him, I came up empty and alone.