34. Wren
WREN
Iwasn’t in the mood to get out of bed. I woke from a weird night of twisted dreams. Half nightmares, partial fantasies, they merged from one extreme to another.
After Viktor made me feel so good, relaxed and sated with how thoroughly he pleasured me and let me get him off, too, I should’ve slept like a rock.
Yet, now as I gave up on sleeping in, my body was still so tired.
I sighed, looking up at the ceiling.
“Weird.”
That was all I could mutter aloud as I listened for a sign that Viktor was still home.
It was much later than I liked to get up, but there just wasn’t anything I could do about it now.
I was tired, and in the back of my mind, I knew it had to mean that I was pregnant.
This was the beginning of my body changing on me, and I couldn’t stick my head under the sand forever and act like it wasn’t a possibility, but more a very likely reality.
A blessing.
I smiled, imagining being pregnant. Of having a child. Watching him or her grow up with Luka and Isabel…
I hope.
Before I could dwell further on whether this was just my mind playing tricks on me or if I needed to go to the store and get a test, my dreams came back to me.
Viktor fighting through a crowd to reach me with multiple cars exploding.
Me trying to talk louder to be heard at a press conference when everyone was shouting at me that I was a liar.
Then back in that alley, running and trying not to get shot at by snipers in every window, but without Viktor being the one to chase me.
And last, my mother holding a baby in a blanket, smiling and so happy before she looked up at me and told me that the “bad guys” are still out there and need to pay.
It was a messed-up shift of dreams that unsettled me, but I wasn’t confused about why they happened. They were all parts of what was on my mind lately.
I got up and sat on the edge of the bed, glancing at the note on the nightstand.
What’s this?
I picked it up and read Viktor’s chicken scratch.
I need to run out and handle a couple of things but I swear allegiance to that sweet pussy as soon as I’m back.
-V
I smiled, rubbing the back of my neck at his little message. I wasn’t sure I’d be ready for him to ascend on me again. I was so sore, and I couldn’t get over how sensitive my nipples were. Still, I wouldn’t imagine I’d last long to resist him.
You’re too good to me, Mr. Volkov.
I set the note aside and got up. The second I stood and headed to the bathroom, though, the urgency to vomit took over me. Consumed by the need to throw up, I dropped into a jog, placing my hands over my mouth.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
For several minutes, I had to struggle to get ahold of myself. Only when my stomach muscles ached from heaving and there was nothing else to empty into the toilet as I kneeled on the floor and caught my breath did I give in completely
“There’s no doubt.”
There couldn’t be any doubt that I was pregnant.
Getting cleaned up took me a while, but I tried to keep moving.
I was glad that Viktor wasn’t here to see me like this, and I was grateful that Elena wasn’t waiting on me to show up to work with her on our ongoing financial investigation.
We’d mutually agreed to take the day “off” and see what kind of reactions were coming from that exposure at the press conference.
With that firmly in my mind, I went downstairs to see what I could find out.
It took me that long to realize that I’d left my phone at the mansion.
“Whoops.”
With a cup of coffee just to see if I could handle it, I headed out to the gardens where Paul overlapped his assistant and butler and guard duties with his interest in being an amateur horticulturist.
I didn’t feel like driving to the mansion just to get my phone, but I bet that someone would be heading from it that they could drop it off.
With how my dreams had bothered me and how uneasy my stomach was, I wanted to hang out at home.
No plans sounded nice. But having my phone would matter, though, in case of an emergency or if Viktor wanted to get ahold of me.
“Morning, Paul.”
“Morning?” He glanced at his watch. Sweat beaded on his brow as he raked a patch of dirt and thatch.
I smiled. “Hey, um, I think I left my phone at the mansion.”
He nodded. “You did. Elena realized that when she tried texting you and heard it ring there. She’s bringing it by in about an hour when she and the others are going shopping for a birthday gift for Alexei.” He glanced up at me again. “I suspect that she will hope you’ll go too.”
I winced. Spending time with them sounded great, but it didn’t match my staying-in mood.
“I can let them know you’re unavailable,” he offered, ever helpful.
“No.” I smiled and rolled my eyes. “I can tell them I’m just not feeling up to it.”
He nodded again and I left him to do his gardening.
Back inside, I wondered how long I’d need to wait before they arrived. I gave up on drinking my coffee and rinsed out my mug to reuse it.
Why, though?
I furrowed my brow at the mug on the counter when I realized that if I couldn’t stomach a cup of coffee now, I probably wouldn’t be able to later, either.
Elena called out for me, letting herself in. “Hello? Wren?”
“Hey. I’m in here.” I turned from the counter and came to greet them as they entered the house.
“Did you just get up?” Carina asked. She tilted her head to the side, curious.
I laughed once. “Is it that obvious?” I asked.
“Kind of,” she replied, blunt as ever.
I smirked. “Thanks.”
“Well, we stopped by earlier before we were going to go shopping to drop off your phone and say hi, but Paul said you were still in bed. I mean, that was early, but still…” Carina narrowed her eyes at me.
“We already went to half the stores we wanted to check out before going to more, but it seems like you’re not dressed to go out. ”
I looked down at my shorts and comfy tee. I wasn’t dressed for anything but being a slug on the couch. “I’m kind of hoping to be lazy and stay in today.”
“Are you feeling okay?” Elena glanced behind me, frowning.
I looked behind myself to see what had her so curious and looking like that.
“Um. Why do you ask?” I smiled in thanks as she handed my forgotten phone over to me.
“Well…” She walked over to the counter and picked up the coffee mug. “You’re usually hardcore guzzling coffee when you are first up. At least that’s what I’ve noticed when we’re working together.”
“Oh.” Damn her and how observant she was. The quiet ones were always the perceptive ones, not missing anything. I opened and closed my mouth, unsure what to say. “Um.”
Carina pointed at me, her eyes popping open wide. “You didn’t want wine last night.”
I gaped at her.
Dammit!
She wasn’t a quiet person, and she wasn’t missing anything either.
“Wren, are you…” Mila cleared her throat. “Are you…”
I slumped to prop my butt on the stool at the island. Groaning loudly, I dropped my elbows on the marble surface and plopped my face in my hands.
“Oh, my God!” Elena gasped.
“Are you pregnant?” Carina asked.
“Okay, let’s not overwhelm her, maybe,” Mila said.
I lifted my face and winced at them. “I’m scared I might be,” I admitted in a whisper.
“Scared? Why?” Elena beamed as she hugged me.
“Yeah, like there’s nothing scary about having your body totally taken over by someone else and changed and dealing with the hormones and the thought of childbirth and—”
Mila set her hand on Carina’s arm and raised her brows.
“Nope.” Carina laughed once and smiled at me. “Nothing scary about it at all.” She joined in to hug me from the opposite side that Elena was on.
“Are you, though?” Mila asked.
I shrugged, patting both Elena’s and Carina’s forearms. “I don’t know. I’m late. And I’ve been feeling off.”
“Are you always on time?” Elena asked.
“Yeah.” I nodded. “Always.”
“And I’ll assume you’re not using protection?” Carina guessed.
I shook my head. “My shot is due to expire soon and I didn't get one before I was transferring here. I knew I’d need one soon, but I was going to get a new doctor here and then get it.”
“Well, there’s only one way to find out.” Carina reached into her tote-bag-sized purse. She handed out a pregnancy test kit.
I blinked and studied her. “You always carry a pregnancy test around with you?”
“No. But since I’m only relying on breastfeeding for birth control and I know I can’t wait to get some again, Maksim and I will probably be playing with fate to have another baby as soon as possible.
” She grinned. “I just wanted to have it on hand and grabbed one when we stopped at the store since we were there.” She thrust the kit to me.
“Looks like you’re playing with fate too. ”
“Fate?” I cringed. “That’s how this would be? I was fated to get knocked up and…” I shook my head, still trying to wrap my mind around it. Me, a mother. Viktor… a father?
“And you’d tell Viktor and see how thrilled he would be,” Elena guessed, finishing that sentence for me.
“He would be, wouldn’t he?” I dared to smile. He looked like a natural, holding Luka and Isabel.
“He would,” Carina said. “All of them are so gruff, but they are total softies at heart for the next generation of the family.”
“I guess I should take the test and know,” I said.
“Yes, you should.” Carina backed up, miming that she was zipping her lips. “And we won’t say anything, right?”
“Nope. Not a word.” Elena grinned. “You gotta tell him first.”
“Want us to stay?” Mila asked, sweet to offer.
I shook my head. “No, you go on and have fun shopping.”
“Ha. Shopping for a birthday gift for Alexei?” Carina scoffed. “Easier said than done.”
I thanked them again for the encouragement to embrace a pregnancy as a good thing. They repeated their offers of support, even just to call and talk. And once more, I was so relieved to have them in my life.
I studied the test kit for a long moment, realizing that I couldn’t be afraid to figure out who else would be in my life now, a baby boy or girl.
Setting my hand on my stomach, I drew in a deep breath and turned to go take the test and have a final answer before Viktor came home. It’d be better to handle this in our room, where I could have more privacy than any bathroom down here.
A boy or girl…
I tried not to get too far ahead of myself, but nothing could wipe off this tentative smile from my face.
I went upstairs to the bathroom in the master suite, but when I realized I’d left my phone on the kitchen counter, I set the test kit in a drawer and headed back down to grab it.
I’d need to set a timer for the test to be run.
I furrowed my brow at the funky sounds the fan was making, extra pffts like puffs of air.
I dismissed it, knowing that it had to mean Viktor was messing with the settings of it.
That man could not settle on one temperature…
In the hallway, I heard a thud come from downstairs.
What the hell was that?
I was home alone.
No one else was here.
Except Paul, if he was done with his gardening.
I froze, too trained not to pick up on the slightest cues of danger.
What was that?
A body?
A sixth sense pricked up my spine and I retreated, placing my feet carefully on the carpet and avoiding making a single sound. I backed up, heart racing, and got the gun out from the nightstand where Viktor kept one.
Back in the hallway, I held the firearm up securely, aiming it in front of me as I watched for a sign of someone trespassing.
No one can get in.
The whole place is guarded.
Men are always patrolling.
I swallowed, assessing, ascertaining, and acting as cautiously as I could. It wasn’t just myself that I’d need to protect if danger was present.
I’ll keep you safe.
I’ll protect you.
If I was carrying a new life inside me, I’d do all I could to keep him or her safe.
I crept down the stairs, checking every inch that it was clear.
No one ambushed me.
No one ran out.
No one was waiting for me…
Tense and slowly clearing the hallway and stairwell, I descended and kept my eyes open for any sign of someone who could have broken in.
Before I got to the last riser, one foot still in the air, I felt the air rush at me.
Someone was here. Someone was coming at me.
I didn’t think.
I didn’t assess or ascertain.
I acted.
It wasn’t a conscious motion. Relying on that innate sense of fight or flight, I moved on instinct alone and spun before trying to put my foot down.
Bringing my knee up as I twisted, I slammed it into the attacker’s face.
I was higher up still on the steps, and it gave me the perfect level to bash my knee into his face.
His hair lifted off as he grunted in pain. The toupee flopped up, and I let all the anger inside me fuel me into kicking his ass.
Smithson was a dead man walking for daring to break in here and sneak up on me.
If he could survive me right now, he’d only be prolonging his death sentence for when Viktor returned.
Because I couldn’t know if he’d come alone or not, I didn’t yell for a guard. I didn’t scream for help because if someone else was close, I’d be outnumbered.
Before he could even grab me around my waist, I brought my other leg up as soon as I landed on the other one.
A swift slam of my foot on the back of his knee had him crashing to the ground.
I leaped down, gun out as he rolled onto his back. He was lifting his gun to me, but I was faster.
I shot him. Dead center in the heart. Three times. Then twice in the head.
Blood gushed out from his broken nose.
His eyes glossed over, vacant, as his life ended.
With his arm done, his gun dropping to the floor, he released his last breath.
I heaved with mine, panting and frantic to stay calm.
I’d never killed before. I had only had a desk job until I was supposed to start as a field agent. In the name of the job or outside of it, I had never taken a life, and it sobered me instantly.
I’d killed someone.
I swallowed hard, staring at the man who’d tried to get me killed more than once.
It was wrong, in a general sense, to take a life. I knew that. But I hadn’t put myself in the category of a murderer by shooting Smithson.
It was self-defense.
It was protecting my unborn baby that I was convinced I had growing inside me already.
I gulped again.
Assess. Ascertain. And act.
I swallowed again, steadying myself after the rush of that danger.
“Paul?” I called it out confidently, knowing that if anyone else was in here to hurt me, I’d already given my location away by shooting Smithson.
A quiet moan came from the foyer, and I ran to help.
He was lying on the floor, his blood pooling a widening puddle of crimson on the white marble floor.
“Paul!”
I skidded, dropping to my knees to check him over. Finding the gunshots that must have been those pffts of air that I mistook as the fan acting up but were actually Smithson’s shots fired with a silencer, I hurried to cover the wounds and compress the bleeding as he closed his eyes.
“Help!” I screamed it, counting on one of the guards patrolling to hear me and come to make sure that only one person died in this house today.