Chapter 37
elaine
Clara yowled grumpily as she walked into the room while I was cooking, and I laughed, kneeling to scratch her behind the ears.
“I know, baby,” I said. “I miss her, too. But she’ll be back in just a bit.”
She purred when I petted her—I was at least her second-favorite—but she still looked grouchy.
Vera had left this morning. After Caitlyn had identified the South Yard operation last week, we’d had a strategy meeting where we’d agreed we had to observe the Horizon development to be able to bring a legal case and stop it.
Vera had mentioned a contact who just went by Rail, a seventy-year-old retired mob logistician who lived in a small house in the old town, who knew the harbor routes better than anyone—and how to stop them.
She’d left this morning to meet Rail, after gathering enough resources to make what was apparently the required tribute offering to work with him, and I’d been tense all day waiting to see if she’d make it back safely.
I knew she was capable of anything. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that something terrible was hiding just under the surface, and I was more worried for her every time she went out.
I told myself it was because things were getting more dangerous as time went on, more likely that the truth about Penumbra would come to light.
But in reality, I knew it was because I was falling for her more and more.
And of course, assuming she did come back safely, she’d still probably have some… endorphins to work out. I was already wearing one of the wine-red underwear sets Vera got me, ready for whenever she’d get back and…
A timer going off pulled me out of my thoughts, and blushing fiercely, I gave Clara one more kiss on the head and stood up to wash my hands and get back to the food.
Caitlyn came in not long before the food was ready, wheeling her chair in through the doorway and the furniture that had been rearranged for her chair, and she smiled sweetly at me.
“Anything I can help with?”
“Oh, no, no. I’m not making you help. But you’re right on time. You can set up at the table.”
“I’m offering to help,” she laughed. “My arms still work fine!”
“No, I didn’t mean it like—”
She folded her arms, giving me a dry smile. “You’re still babying me. I’m a grownup now.”
I sighed, dropping my arms by my sides.
I guess she was a grownup. My little baby sister, all grown up and… working for a mob family. And firing a gun. I wasn’t thinking too much about those parts.
“Can you set the table?” I said, and she beamed.
“I’m on it.”
We worked around each other for a minute, talking about the food and the setup, and finally we settled down into the gentle quiet between us as the last of the food was in the oven and the table was ready, and Caitlyn smiled softly at me.
“I’m glad to see you’re doing better now.”
“I’m… stressed. About a lot of things. I can’t believe I’ve been pulled into this all,” I said. “But… it’s nice to be a part of something.”
She looked down. “I hated seeing how much Mom was just… draining you.”
“Mom was doing her best with what she had. She just… didn’t know how to…”
“Stop. You don’t need to make excuses for her.”
I sighed. “She raised me. I can’t complain.”
“Listen to you. You sound like Vera and Petra. I can’t betray the family.”
I laughed. “It’s not like that.”
“You’re your own person. You don’t owe her anything for raising you. And she hurt you so much.”
“She hurt you so much. She was… I mean, she’d been hitting you.”
She snorted. “It never hurt that much. The things she said hurt much more.”
“Cait…”
She shook her head. “But now we’re here. And you and your wife…” She grinned. “I never imagined you with a woman like that.”
I blushed. “It’s not like that.”
She wheeled in closer, lowering her voice. “You do like her, though, don’t you?”
I didn’t dare face just how much I did like her.
It was impossible, I knew that. But I couldn’t help thinking about how it felt when it was just the two of us in our bed late at night and Vera would laugh, her mask slipping just a little to let me see the woman she was underneath…
“I said, it’s not like that. We’re just… friends, I guess?”
Caitlyn folded her arms. “Friends don’t talk about their friends that way.”
“What?” I felt my face burn. “What did she say?”
She didn’t tell me.
“Caitlyn.”
“You’re dodging the question.”
“I don’t know.” I sighed, a hand to my head. “Okay, I… I don’t know. She’s beautiful, and she’s powerful, passionate, intense. She makes me feel safe. And I keep wanting to know more about who she is underneath the surface.”
Her expression softened. “I think she’s a good person. Just… you need to be careful you don’t get hurt.”
“I know. I know Vera and I can’t be anything… real. So for now I’m just…” I shrugged, fussing with my ring. “I’m just married, I guess.”
My heart jumped when I heard the front door open, and I looked up and found a different woman than I’d been hoping for—Petra coming around the corner and into the kitchen, holding a bag and waving. She had a long cut over one cheek, and her hair was a bit of a mess.
“Am I interrupting a family reunion?” she said, dropping the bag on the table. Caitlyn turned back and frowned.
“Petra—your cheek.”
“Oh, that.” She wiped the cut, looking at the blood on her fingers before she shrugged. “Thrown bottles will do that to you.”
“What happened?” I said.
“I’m calling Jenna,” Caitlyn said, and Petra snatched the phone from her hand.
“It’s a cut on the cheek. My pride won’t survive if I have to see the doctor to give my boo-boo a band-aid and tell me I’m very brave.”
“It could get infected!” Caitlyn protested, but Petra just mussed her hair again.
“Were you in a fight?” I said. “Whitecliffs?”
“Much scarier. Your mom.”
“My mom?” My stomach dropped.
“I went around for some stuff, and she went off on me for leading her daughters off and turning them against her, leaving her with no family and no support… anyway, suffice to say tact isn’t what I’m usually deployed for.
” She scratched her head. “I told her she was a shit parent and to fuck herself with a chainsaw. Turns out she didn’t like that. ”
“Is she okay?” I said. It was a stupid question, but it came out without me thinking.
“Not really. She’s been drinking herself stupid and fighting with your brother. Things seemed pretty rough for the guy, so I’ve arranged for him to be moved to a better location where he can attend classes without having to worry about what’s waiting for him at home.”
“Petra…” Caitlyn clasped her hands together. “I didn’t think you had it in you to be sweet.”
“Hey!” Petra folded her arms. “You’re lucky you’re so scrawny I take pity on you and won’t fight you, because otherwise we’d be squaring up right now.”
My heart split in two thinking about it. On the one hand, knowing Matt was safe now too was such a relief. He’d be able to focus on his classes now, and I knew his grades would improve when he wasn’t navigating that home life situation.
But on the other hand, thinking of Mom all alone in that house with no one to support her… even knowing what she did to Caitlyn, even imagining what she must have done to Matt, I couldn’t help my heart breaking for her.
“Oh, and not to worry,” Petra said, a hand up. “Matt took the dumbass little sausage dog too.”
Caitlyn lit up. “His name is Bernard! He liked you, didn’t he?”
“Yeah, we went for a little run together once I’d gotten Matt set up at his place. He’s pretty quick for his tiny little legs. Bernard, not Matt. Anyway, that’s not what I went for.” She opened her bag and rummaged through, and I felt like I could cry when I saw what she pulled out.
She held it up with a mischievous grin, eyes gleaming, and Caitlyn put a hand over her mouth.
Caitlyn’s tablet. The one I’d gotten her for her birthday.
“I hear this was important to you,” she said, handing it to Caitlyn, and Caitlyn choked, wiping her eyes.
“Oh my god, Petra. You went back there just to…?”
“Ah, don’t look at me like that. You just look like a sad puppy sometimes, so I thought I’d give you something to do.”
“You’re such a jerk,” Caitlyn laughed through tears, taking the tablet. “I don’t know how to… thank you.”
Petra flexed. “Draw a picture of me knocking Vera’s lights out, and we’ll be even.”
Caitlyn sniffled, wiping her eyes. I felt my chest swelling, too. This was our safe place. It was ridiculous that the safest family home I’d ever had was a mob house with two lethal families looming over us from either side, but…
But in the end, family was the people who loved you.
“Thank you,” I whispered. “For helping.”
Petra scratched her head. “I just wanted the picture.”
“You would make a good figure model,” Caitlyn said. “I guess you’re good for something other than just throwing punches after all.”
“Hell yeah, I am. I’m damn good at kicks, too.”
We all laughed together, some of us fighting tears as we did, and the oven timer went off.
It was only a bit later that we were all sitting around the table together with food, Jenna having shown up for dinner too and echoing Caitlyn that Petra needed to do something to make sure her cut didn’t get infected. Petra, of course, complained about it.
But we were mid-meal when the front door slammed open again, and Petra and I both stood up, turning to where footsteps came striding in.
My heart shot into my mouth when Vera turned the corner, her clothes torn and a bloodstain on one arm, soot and dirt on her face, and she headed straight for us.
“Vera,” I said, and she stopped at the table, picked up a turkey drumstick, and polished off half of it in two bites.
“They tried to kill Rail,” she said. “God, I needed some damn food.”
She took another bite, set it down, and she collapsed on the floor.