21. Rei
Conrad still hadn’t reprimanded me for going on a date with Quentin, and it was eating me alive. Was he stewing, or did he really not know? And if he didn’t know, when would he find out?
That, paired with the impending Christmas dinner at my parents’ house, had my gut churning.
I stood at the end of the sidewalk and looked up at the suburban house I grew up in, string lights pinned along the eaves. Then my gaze turned down to an inflatable gingerbread man deflated in the front yard like a sad little brown puddle in a sea of dormant grass.
I wished I could trade places with the inflatable and stay outside instead. But the ensuing guilt trip would be unbearable. Besides, I couldn't miss time with my niece.
With a deep breath, I continued up the sidewalk, lined with plastic candy canes, to the front door where a giant red-and-green wreath burst forth like the innards of a jack-in-the-box. Curling ribbons sprang from it like a Christmas explosion.
I pushed the door open, the wreath brushing over my cashmere sweater, and chaos greeted me. First light, then smells of different foods cooking, and then a forty-pound ball of energy, otherwise known as my niece, Lucy. She crashed into my legs, screaming, “REIREI!”
Laughing, I bent and scooped her up. “It’s good to see you too, Lulu.” Once she was propped on my hip, I brushed her fine blond hair out of her face with my fingertips. “What did Santa get you?”
She smiled and started talking about the Christmas present she found under the tree this morning. It was easier to focus on her than everything else, so I looked into her light-blue eyes, listening raptly to every word.
“My pink Lamborghini go fast!” She swished her arm for emphasis, and that’s when I noticed the small red car in her hand.
“A Lambo already?” I asked, pretending to be shocked. “Do you have a license?”
She giggled, squirmed down from my arms, and jetted to the massive orange twisty track I saw built in the middle of my parents’ living room. Several cars were already lined up against the launcher.
With Lucy occupied again with her toys, I had no choice but to face the adults. Dad and my brother spared me a wave and looked back at the TV, where a football game was playing.
“Don’t you think they need a day off?” I asked.
Dad huffed. “They make enough money to play three-sixty-five.”
My brother nodded. “It’s not like they’re saving lives or anything,” he muttered, a nod to the fact that he was a doctor and had been on call the last several years.
“Hi, Rei,” Mom said, coming around the island to hug me. “It’s been a while. Did you forget where we live?” She gave me a pained look with her light-blue eyes.
“I’ve been busy with work,” I said, reminding myself that I didn’t need to feel guilty. The phone worked both ways, and she could just as easily drive to me.
From the kitchen, my brother’s wife, Eleanor, said, “I didn’t know what busy was until I had Lucy!” Her blond hair was perfectly pinned back with a deep-red bow. Under her apron, she wore a matching dress and heels. She looked like a model.
Mom said, “You’re so right. I must have had things to do before I had kids, but I can’t remember for the life of me what they were.” She grabbed my hand, tugging me toward the kitchen. “Come help us with dinner.”
“I could watch football with the guys,” I suggested, trying not to be salty.
Mom laughed. “Here, you can chop the vegetables for the crudité.”
Eleanor glanced over at me. “Hi, Rei. You’re looking very put together today.” She smiled brightly.
“Um. Thanks.” That’s what every girl wanted to hear.
I started chopping carrots into sticks and stared at the back of my brother’s head.
When I was younger, I used to argue that it wasn’t fair that men got to sit down while women worked away, but it was no use.
Not with Mom’s traditional values and Dad’s appreciation for being able to sit on the couch and have food served to him on a silver platter. Or any color platter, really.
“Try this knife instead,” Eleanor interrupted my mental tirade. “You can rock with it, like this.” She demonstrated a kind of seesaw motion on the curved blade.
I bit my tongue and took the knife. “Thanks.” The carrots were getting chopped just fine before. But I rolled my shoulders back, trying to relax. She was just being nice. Or trying to.
From the pot where she was putting together her famous chocolate pudding dessert, Mom said, “Rei was always a little lost in the kitchen. I think she lives off takeout now.” Her tone implied her disapproval. “All that sodium.” She tsked.
“Yes!” Eleanor said, all the while effortlessly managing several pots on the stove. “You know, I was just reading about all the horrible effects of sodium on the body. That might be why you look a little puffy, Rei. Extra water weight.”
My eyebrows pinched. “Excuse me?”
Mom said, “Are you seeing anyone, Rei? I haven’t heard from you in forever. The last time you were over was...” She tapped her chin.
“Thanksgiving,” I supplied.
“A whole month!” Eleanor said. “I feel like we don’t go a day without seeing each other.” She bumped shoulders with my mom.
An awful twist of jealousy panged my stomach. I shouldn’t have been jealous. I didn’t even really want to be here today.
“You have the granddaughter,” Mom said, oblivious to my feelings. “I have to see that cutie as much as possible.”
I sighed quietly and scraped the carrots into a bowl.
Then I started on the cucumbers, wishing this could be over with.
Imagining what Christmas with a different family would look like.
Jada and Bryce were in Cottonwood Falls right now with his four siblings and all their children.
I bet that house was full of love and laughter.
I wondered what Quentin’s house was like.
Just as I was picturing him in a cream-colored sweater pouring a glass of vintage white wine, Mom said, “Rei, can you set the table?”
“Of course.” My shoulders relaxed as I excused myself to the formal dining room. At least there I could have a moment to myself.
The extra leaf had been added to the table, giving us plenty of room for dinner.
Going to the cabinet, I grabbed the place mats first. These were white with snowflakes embroidered in white thread.
I examined them for a moment, trying to tell if Mom had made them or bought them.
A small flaw on one confirmed Mom had done it.
Curiosity sated, I laid out each place mat. Then I got the bottom plate, stark white as well, and set it out.
I’d done this chore so many times, I could manage it in my sleep. I practically blinked and all the plates, silverware, and glasses were set out.
Only the sight of a person walking up the sidewalk drew me out of the trance.
My eyes bugged out as I recognized Conrad’s lean form, dressed in all black with a deep green scarf wrapped around his neck. My stomach dropped, and I rushed from the dining room to the front door.
The bell came before I could cut him off, echoing around in my head like a warning siren.
“Are we expecting more?” Mom asked from the kitchen.
“Probably a salesman,” I said. “Who does that on Christmas?” I opened the door, wedging myself in the doorway and intending to go outside with Conrad.
But he beat me to it, his chest pressing against mine and refusing to budge.
I stumbled back, righting myself, as he forced himself inside. “Merry Christmas, Kellys!” he boomed.
Like moths to flames, my dad and brother got up from the couch. Testosterone earned their interest. Along with the giant present in Conrad’s arms.
“Conrad,” Dad said. “Great to see you! What did you bring us?”
Conrad passed it to him, grinning. “Your favorite popcorn, sir. And a set of new tea towels for Mrs. Kelly to embroider. I know that keeps her busy.”
Dad looked pleased as punch, and Mom said, “That is so thoughtful of you. I’m so glad Rei got into business with a good man. Especially after what happened before.”
A weight settled on my chest at the mention. At the meaning. Like I couldn’t handle a business on my own and needed a man’s advice to succeed.
I fought to keep my tone even as I said, “I’m sure Conrad has a family gathering of his own to get to, but thanks for stopping by.” I went to the door to hold it open for him.
“Actually...” Conrad gave us a brave-soldier-carrying-on kind of expression.
“Mom and Dad went on a trip this Christmas. Just me and a TV dinner. It is turkey, though.” He pretended to be hopeful at the thought, but it was all an act.
At this point, it felt like everything I knew about him was a lie.
“Oh, nonsense, you must dine with us,” Mom said, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and leading him inside. “We have so much food we’ll never be able to eat it all.”
His whole face brightened up. “Are you sure it won’t be an imposition? It does smell amazing in here.”
“No imposition at all. Go sit with the boys. Dinner will be ready shortly.”