11
Robert had to bite his tongue not to compliment Jo as she came down the stairs that evening. She was wearing a teal silk dress that reminded him of the inside of a seashell. Even though he was not certain he had ever seen one in quite that color.
Her hair was organized in soft curls around her face and bunched up high on her head in the back, laced with several of his grandmother’s diamond pins.
He had found them in the safe this afternoon and asked Jo’s lady’s maid to place them in her hair.
He had been too afraid to give the pins to his wife directly since he was not sure how the gesture would be perceived.
The delicate diamond necklace shone around her neck and the bracelet was placed around her wrist over her long ivory gloves covering her arms from elbow to fingertips.
A ring! Blast it, he had forgotten to buy her a ring.
They had used his signet ring for the ceremony, and he had told himself that he would buy one for her at a later time.
They had been married for two days now, and he had forgotten to look for one, busying himself so that he would not follow her around the house and drink in her sweet sea breeze-like scent.
“Is it too much?” Jo asked as she reached him at the end of the stairs and looked down at her body. “Miss Fletcher said it would be passable to wear both the necklace and the bracelet. But I feel as if I have dressed to meet the queen.”
She had obviously misinterpreted his horrified expression.
“It is not too much,” Robert said and had to clear his throat. “When you meet the queen, you would be wearing even more jewelry. Not to mention a court dress.”
“When I meet the queen?” Jo asked nervously. “Do you… often associate with the royal family?”
He could hear her audibly gulping as he led her through the entrance hall.
“Often depends on your definition of the word,” he told her diplomatically as they walked down the stairs toward the waiting carriage.
“And what is your definition of ‘often’?” Jo inquired as he helped her into the carriage.
“Well, that entirely depends on the context,” Robert deadpanned with a smirk as he settled opposite her.
Not certain whether she caught the flirting note and sexual innuendo he had been unable to refrain from. It was too dark in the carriage for him to tell whether she was blushing. He hoped she was not, since he immediately regretted the comment.
He could not raise her expectations that this union would be anything more than what they agreed.
Nor did he want her to think that he was not honoring her second list. It felt like balancing on a violin string with your eyes closed: he could feel the string digging into his bare feet, uncertain how much longer he would be able to remain on it, yet unable to give up, since he had no clue how great the fall was.
“In this context we are talking of. Meeting the queen,” Jo persisted, sounding a tad irritated.
“My family is acquainted with the royal family, but we are not part of the inner circle. We associate with them at balls and other more ceremonious occasions. You will have to be presented to the queen now that we are married, obviously, but I think it can wait until next season.”
Robert had spoken casually and did not notice how stiff Jo’s posture had become before he looked at her.
“Presented to the queen?” she breathed.
“I… Yes. Jo, you must have realized,” he told her gently and fought the urge to take her hand.
“I suppose I must have known but I have not consciously thought of it. How do I behave? What if I do something wrong? I would hate to…”
“Jo,” Robert interrupted her and clenched his hands on his thighs. “You will be fine. You know how to behave in polite society. You could do nothing wrong.”
He could tell by her pained expression that she was already making a list in her head of everything that could go wrong.
“If you wish, I will speak to my mother about it tonight. I am certain she agrees that it can wait until next season. It will give you plenty of time to adjust to the idea and practice for the presentation.”
Jo was nodding along as he spoke, although he was not certain that his words were registering with her.
It was endearing that being presented at court made her so nervous.
To Robert, court visits were mostly a boring and tedious obligation: You learned what rules you needed to follow; you bowed, kept quiet, and said ‘Yes, Your Majesty’, and then you loosened your cravat on the carriage ride home and breathed again.
They arrived at Xavier’s townhouse before he had time to reassure her further.
“It will be fine. Both when you meet the queen and tonight,” he allowed himself to reassure her.
Jo offered him a feeble smile before he alighted the carriage.
The dinner was a success as far as Robert could tell.
People were enjoying the many courses that Xavier’s cook had managed to plan and gain supplies for in just a day.
Everyone was talking animatedly and Jo had been placed close to his mother and Lady Clopton, a lady a little older than his mother – and one of the greatest gossips of the ton.
She would soon spread word of their happy union.
“How was the meeting today?” Xavier asked in a low voice after the women had left for the drawing room. They were sitting beside each other, having all moved to Xavier’s end of the table, when the ladies left.
“Well. Mr. Hawkins had no choice but to accept the legality of our marriage.” Robert pressed his lips together at the thought of the meeting.
He hoped it was the last time he ever had to see Jo’s cousin.
“What happened?” Xavier asked quietly, leaning toward him. Obviously, his brother had been able to tell that it was not the entire story.
“He continued in the same way as he did yesterday. Implying that there is something the matter with Jo. He…” Robert gritted his teeth as he fought to keep his voice down. “He told me insanity is a valid reason for divorce.”
“What?” Xavier snapped too loudly, drawing the attention of the entire table.
He smiled placatingly and waved a hand for the conversation to continue, but it was not before Thornston started a tale of climbing through some woman’s window and being attacked by her lapdog that the attention of the other gentlemen was drawn away again. “He said that to your face?”
“Not in so many words, but it was easy to interpret his meaning between the lines.” Robert could not meet Xavier’s eyes as he spoke.
The rage was flaring, warm and alive, in his blood as he thought of Mr. Hawkins’ words.
If their solicitors and Mr. Oakley had not been there, he would have pummeled the man.
“Robert,” Xavier said so insistently that Robert turned to look at him.
His stepbrother’s deep blue eyes were searching his face intently.
“I will only ask this once and only out of concern for both of you. But given that Mr. Hawkins knows your wife better than you do, is there any way that he could be…”
“No,” Robert snapped and felt disgusted that Xavier would even think it. “No,” he repeated and rose without thinking.
The entire table looked at him.
“If you will excuse me, gentlemen. I need some air,” he told them and left the room without looking at any of them.
Robert strode through the back of the house, threw open the French doors in Xavier’s office and hurried over the dark lawn toward the shrubbery in the back. He took deep gulps of air as he steadied himself.
He should have kept calm, he told himself as he walked the path and shook his trembling hands.
It was not like him to lose his temper. He knew Xavier had only asked out of concern.
Insanity could be well hidden, and he had only been married to Jo for two days.
Logically, it was a valid point, and yet he could not control his temper.
Not even when it was his stepbrother who asked.
“Robert?” Xavier called quietly from somewhere close by.
“Here,” Robert muttered after taking another deep breath to collect himself.
Xavier came toward him on the dark path.
“I am sorry, Robert. I meant nothing by it,” his brother told him in a sincere voice.
“I know,” Robert said and did not meet his eyes. “I apologize. I should not have left. I should not have let my feelings show.”
He started walking deeper into the garden and Xavier followed him.
“And what are those feelings exactly?” his stepbrother asked tentatively.
Robert felt his stomach stir.
“I… I care for her. She is… I think we are becoming friends.”
It was what he wanted. Friends who slept together as often as possible, of course.
“I hate that Mr. Hawkins almost took control over her life. I loathe the idea of what he might have done to her if he gained influence over her,” Robert continued to distract himself and Xavier from analyzing his and Jo’s relationship any deeper.
“But he did not,” Xavier said gently beside him. “You married her and he will never be able to affect her life again.”
Robert nodded as he sighed deeply. He felt both comforted and confused that he needed the comfort in the first place.
This marriage – Jo herself – was much more difficult to navigate than he had initially thought.
And it had only been two days. They had a lifetime in front of them. Robert sighed at the thought.