40. Carina
CARINA
Maksim and I headed home from Adrik and Elena’s house.
No matter how busy we got, we always made sure to check in on the progress of the nursery. Soon, we would be spending every night here, hopefully putting our son or daughter down in the crib for him or her to spend peacefully through the night.
I wasn’t getting my hopes up high. From all that Elena and I were reading up on, we’d be in for sleep deprivation. So would our husbands.
Maksim leaned against the doorframe, as he usually did in this nightly routine of ours. He crossed his arms and eyed the unfinished room. From his perspective, he was likely envisioning what could go where.
Me? I was scrunching my face and debating the colors. Again.
“Carina.”
“Hmm?” I glanced at him.
“We have months to pick a color for the walls.”
I nodded. “I know. It would just make the room more like a room if the walls were done.”
“How can you say that?” He laughed and gestured with his hand. “That wall hasn’t even been installed or finished since you asked last-minute for a bay window.”
I smiled. “Maybe it can be a balcony.”
He shook his head, smiling with amusement. “Just make up your mind and we’ll get it done.”
My phone rang, and since it was Jorge, I took it while we checked on the progress of the nursery being added on. Adding on to this large home was a little over-the-top, but since we both wanted the nursery on this side of the house, it made the most sense to renovate to make it a reality.
Jorge greeted me warmly, but he wasn’t calling to chitchat.
He updated me about the movement and surveillance that his spies were bringing in.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t good news. Fortunately, it was intel that we could both benefit from in this war against the network Yusef Antonov and Gregori Volkov were behind.
I ended the call and approached Maksim. I let out a heavy sigh, mulling over what Jorge had told me. That was all the signal that my husband needed to pull me into his arms. Bracing my back against the rock-hard wall of his chest, I leaned into his hold.
“What is it?” he asked.
For a man who was fully aware that his family was entering a phase of war, he was remarkably calm. He could be because the Volkovs were a team. Loyal to a fault and always ready to work together.
“Jorge was updating me about the report from the field.”
He hummed. “I wondered when he’d call.”
Jorge was supposed to have called earlier but got delayed.
“And I was stupidly hoping that no news was good news.”
“Not in this case. His spies got close enough to record some of the runners.” I sagged against him, stroking my fingers over his muscled forearms that he linked around my waist. My baby bump was only starting to show and with his arms around me like this, the protective stance warmed my heart.
“Gregori is, without a doubt, ordering Yusef Antonov to pursue the Hernandez Cartel as their main front of competing with the Bratva.”
He nodded, brushing his cheek against my hair. Then he rested his chin on top of my head as we both stood there looking at the empty room that would soon be full and busy with our child’s arrival.
“We already know that Gregori’s trying to do whatever he can to use power against the Bratva’s interests, but I wonder if he can know that we will fight them at every level.”
“How?” he asked. It wasn’t a hopeless inquiry or an expression of frustration. He was asking how, as in what steps I had in mind to act on. Because he valued me as a strategist. Because he counted on me to act as an ambassador and intermediary between the Bratva and the Cartel.
Some days, it wasn’t so easy to remember what life was like before. When I lived at the villa with my brother and struggled constantly, every day, to be heard and hold him in check.
Now, I felt as though I was fulfilling my parents’ wishes from the grave, ensuring the Cartel would thrive and do well under proper leadership.
I wasn’t an active part in the leadership.
I wasn’t there. It wasn’t my place or purpose to go back to the Cartel land and be a figure of authority in the wake of my brother. Or my father.
Here, at home with my husband, I could be just as effective as a counsel for Jorge. It was help from a distance, but I enjoyed the privilege of being the glue between our two families. Between my past and present.
“We discussed sending out some of the men to clog up the runs the Hernandez are counting on. We can cut them off with more arms and drugs that they’re requested to distribute in Miami.”
He murmured his approval. “And that would be a financial hit. Less of a profit from those sales.”
“Which no doubt would go straight to Gregori and not the Hernandez. And after I spoke with Dean and Manny earlier, I think there’s some merit in cutting them off with supplies.
The Hernandez fleet is old and needing repairs.
Putting pressure on some of the repair shops in their area would be another setback for them to handle.
” I leaned toward the side to face him. “I realize that will sound like little, petty means of attack, but it all counts.”
He kissed me. “Nothing you say or suggest is petty or little.”
“It’s the best way to hit back,” I added. “To prevent them from being able to do runs.”
Turning me slowly, he smiled and waited until I faced him fully. Then he kissed me, tenderly yet with that bite of hunger that he never hid from me.
“You don’t need to explain it to me. I trust you. I rely on your judgment.”
I smiled, perfectly content with that praise. I replied with a longer kiss and relished the needy growl that escaped from him when I ground against his hips.
“Before you seduce me,” he said, which had me laughing. “I want you to understand that I mean that, Carina. I trust you and you never have to question if I realize and appreciate what a godsend you are.”
I sank into another kiss and knew that I would never, ever debate if I had my role and purpose here.
“Every day I wake up”—he kissed my left cheek— “and every night before I fall asleep”—he pressed his warm lips to my right cheek—“I am filled with gratitude that I had a chance to find you.”
I smirked. “You didn’t find me. You would’ve had to have been looking for me.”
“And I wasn’t,” he replied. “I wasn’t looking for a woman. Much less a wife. I am grateful that I had a chance to marry you.”
I smiled again. “You were forced to marry me.”
“Hmmm. No. You were forced to marry me. And you made your opinions about that abundantly clear at our wedding.”
I kissed that cocky smirk off his face, annoyed that he was right. As far as relationships went, ours started off rocky.
“We can have another one if you want. A ‘real’ wedding. With ‘real’ vows.”
I huffed. “I thought our marriage was legit.”
“Oh, it is.”
“Then you mean you’re offering to have a renewal of our vows with the impression that we’ll actually listen to them this time?”
“Instead of scowling at each other,” he joked.
“And without you threatening me at the altar?” I added playfully before kissing him again.
“Without you biting me ,either.”
I did then, a teasing nip on his lower lip.
He growled, grinning back at me and clutching me closer. “I’m so fucking lucky I have you.”
“Me too.” I sighed as he lifted me into his arms before carrying me out of the room and kissing me on the way.
Cradling his face and adoring this strong, dangerous man, I licked my lips and looked forward to how we’d celebrate how legitimately married we were as he took me to bed now.
“I promise that our marriage is real. Our vows are real.”
He kissed me as he lowered me to our bed.
“All that matters to me is that I am married to you.”
He paused, staring at me with all the open vulnerability he could let me see and count on. His heart was mine. And he had mine, too.
“All that matters to me is that you are the father of our child.”
He lowered to kiss my belly that was only just almost showing how it would swell.
I ran my hands over his head and urged him back up to kiss me again.
Sinking under the familiar heat of his mouth on mine, demanding and brutal with tenderness only he could have for me, I embraced how my pregnancy was a symbol of survival.
Of making it to this man and belonging with him, both in bed and in the control room.
With all this love, all this hope, I knew that we would almost certainly be stronger together.
And should anyone come for any member of the Volkov bloodline, they’d have to contend with me protecting what was mine.
That was one more very real and unforced vow I would always ascribe to.