Chapter 10
TEN
WAY TOO EASY
Scarlet
My hotel room had a number of bonus features: a fancy coffee machine to get us energised again after a spectacular session of getting down and dirty and soft dressing gowns to wear, one of which Ally proudly donned while answering the door to room service.
We ate a meal, grinning at each other, then we stuck on a film with the blanket over our knees.
This was all too nice, and way too easy.
Any minute, he’d jump up and leave. He hadn’t shared a single thought on meeting his daughter, and I wasn’t going to push him on that, even if it was killing me to know where his head was at. But the fundamental point? I simply didn’t want him to go.
“How are you going to get home tonight?” I asked. “Your car is still by the side of the road, isn’t it?”
He cocked his head then hopped down from the bed, retrieving his phone from his jeans. Then he hit something on his screen. A synthetic voice read out a message from his breakdown service. The car had been taken to a garage for repair.
“Looks like I’m stuck here.” He climbed back under the covers and threw me a wink.
“Actually, I planned to stay over anyway. I’m seeing a solicitor in the morning to start legal proceedings for the bairn.
” He scrubbed over his face with the side of his hand.
“Ah shite. I just caught your drift. You’re trying to get rid of me. I didn’t even think about the time.”
It wasn’t late, barely eight in the evening.
“Let me grab my things and I’ll be out of your hair.”
“No!” I clutched at the neck of my dressing gown and pushed up on my knees. “That wasn’t what I meant. Don’t be silly. Stay here. I mean, if you want.”
He glanced around the room then came back to me. “Ye sure?”
I nodded, suddenly feeling young and embarrassed, despite what we’d just done. “I’d like it.”
His eyes crinkled at the edges. “I would, too.”
And like that, we were spending the night together.
“So, the bairn seemed to like me. She didn’t take one look and scream anyway.”
At last. “When do you get to see her next?” I twisted to lie on one side, facing him, the movie forgotten.
Ally did the same. His hand found my arm, sliding under the wide sleeve to make circles on my skin. “As soon as I can drag my social worker down from Inverness. It’s going to be a battle, but how will she know me if I’m just there an hour a week?”
“How did it feel, holding her?” I asked, spellbound by him and his movements.
Ally gazed right into my eyes. “Love at first sight.”
Wow.
After a beat, he dropped the eye contact, his forehead creasing.
“It’s hard to explain, and the whole visit was like going through the motions.
Acting, ye ken. Not myself. But gazing down at her and knowing she was mine had this powerful impact.
When it came time to leave, all I wanted to do was stick her inside my shirt again and make a run for it.
I expected to feel something, but nae so strong. ”
“Mathilda said she fell in love with her babies the moment she knew she was pregnant, but that the feeling grew and grew the more time went on. Then, when they were born, it ramped up again. She used to stare at their faces for hours.”
“This already hurts.” He rubbed his chest. “It’s going to floor me if it’s just the start.”
“Then that answers all your questions about what you’re going to do next.”
Ally exhaled slowly. “Walking away was never an option. I know what I want, but that’s one of the questions I have for the solicitor. Whether I’ll have any chance of claiming her as a single father. I don’t have a home of my own, or a steady job. Yet, anyway.”
“You’d give up modelling?”
“If I have to. It might not be enough, though.”
“What else can you do?”
The tender expression he was wearing evaporated. “Ask one of my brothers to apply to adopt her, perhaps.”
“Jesus,” I swore.
“Aye. But they all have homes, incomes, partners. Wasp would be the best bet, as he and Taylor don’t have their own children yet.” He gave a short laugh. “Ye recall my guess in Milan? Why they were trying to call me? I thought he had pregnancy news. Little did I know it was for me.”
We both quietened for a moment. Still touching. The movie still playing. Despite the amount of time I’d known Ally, our acquaintance had been surface-level. I had no understanding of his depths. Now, I wanted to explore them all. He needed someone to know him. To shore him up.
“How do you feel about Wasp applying?”
“I fucking hate the idea.”
I did, too. It felt wrong, but I could see why he was considering it.
Ally’s fingers found a lock of my hair. He toyed with it, clearly working through something in his head. “It might not be a bad idea, changing up my life. There’s a number of reasons why leaving modelling behind could be a good thing.”
“Really? I thought you loved the lifestyle.”
“I loved the money. What chance have I got of finding another job that pays that well?”
I’d never asked about his dyslexia, and only knew what my sister had told me, but he’d said something similar in Milan, and it had played on my mind. Without knowing quite how to phrase it, I asked the question. “How does it affect you? Your condition. I know reading is tricky.”
He watched me for a moment. “Tricky is an understatement. I have what’s called double deficit dyslexia.
I don’t recognise letters or numbers quickly and, then, when I do work out what they are, it’s a struggle to turn them into words.
Reading anything takes me forever, and I’m an impulsive kind of guy.
I don’t have the patience to struggle through.
If I read out loud, that can help, but it’s embarrassing. ”
“Would you be embarrassed in front of me?”
“Aye.”
My chest hurt. “Why?”
“What do you see when ye look at me?”
“An extraordinarily hot guy.”
This earned me half a smile. “What would ye think if ye saw me sweating over a four-word sentence? Or taking half an hour to read the first column on a menu? Sounding out each piece of every word then struggling over decoding it.”
“I’d want to help.”
“Which puts me in a pretty pathetic space, and I’ve got a hefty ego to maintain.”
He wasn’t fooling me. Ally walked the walk, but under the surface was a kind and humble guy.
“I could work harder,” he admitted. “I’m supposed to practice more and train myself, but it takes time and effort. It’s easier to rely on my phone and not put myself in the way of needing to read anything complex. No one asks a model to read.”
Hence why modelling suited him perfectly. “It must be a hard decision. Giving it up.”
His lip curled, and he didn’t meet my gaze. “Not so much. It was glamorous to start with. A lark. But there’s a seedy side to it. Steroids, drugs, bulimia, and plastic surgery are rife. I ignored all of that. Until…”
He swallowed, and I reached out and took his fingers, entwining them in mine.
“Until what?”
“Fuck, I’ve barely told anyone about this.
” He took a deep breath then rolled to his back, staring at the ceiling.
“A lot of models supplement their income with private hire. Which means they are paid to attend parties or restaurants, hang around in the background looking pretty. In the off season, it’s a great way to earn big.
I never went down that route as my agent didn’t take that kind of work.
Then this year, she changed her policy, and she started pushing me to pick up these jobs, saying it would benefit my career to be seen in all the right places. ”
I didn’t like where this was going, and I squeezed his hand.
“She booked me to hang out with this billionaire guy, a tech entrepreneur. Not just me, but half a dozen of us, men and women. The guy seemed to think we were prostitutes, though. He grabbed my junk through my trousers.” Ally winced. “I think he drugged me, too.”
“What the fuck?” I shot up, horrified.
“I know. Wasp had to take blood tests for me earlier this week. I couldn’t be sure what they’d find. I can’t go back to that. My agent is furious that I’m taking this time out. I spoke to her a couple of days ago, and she’s demanding I play ball or she ditches me. It’s all falling to pieces.”
“That businessman should be reported for sexual assault.” My blood boiled. “He can’t get away with that.”
“I can’t report it, not if I’m in the middle of a custody case.
It’ll add a complication that will mean delays and investigation into the type of work I was doing.
Can you imagine the judge reading up on these contracts and still thinking I’d be a great da?
I know what I should do—give up modelling altogether.
But that leaves me with no proven income.
I can take another job on the estate, but it would be shite pay in comparison, and I’d only just have started it.
I’ve got to hope that will be enough but I’ll find out more tomorrow. ”
I was still furious over the man who thought he could touch Ally, drug Ally. “What is his name?”
“Jeremiah Jones. I wish I’d smacked him in the face.”
Ally pulled me into a hug, but my mind had gone to a darker place. I knew the name Jeremiah Jones. He was on Dad’s professional radar, I was sure. The top tier of the world’s business management was small and frequently interacted in deals.
“I’m sorry that happened to you,” I murmured into Ally’s shoulder. “Hey, will you call me after the appointment so I know how it goes? I’ll be flying out of Edinburgh tomorrow at lunchtime so I won’t be able to see you again.”
He hummed in agreement, settling back on the pillows. “That’s probably for the best. That blowjob was too good. A man could get used to that.”
I burst out in a laugh, but it was bittersweet. “Right back at you. It’s a pity we can’t do more of it.” Dad’s proposal loomed large in the front of my mind. “I have no idea where I’ll be after my internship ends. Maybe not even the UK.”
“No?” Ally’s game face slipped. “Where will you go?”
“Hong Kong is on the cards.”
He stared, then forced a smile. “That’s a long way to meet up.”