9. Chapter 9
Sadie
“You were being difficult,” Alyssa said as she sat on my bed, watching me brush my hair.
“It was fine.”
“Fine, but it could have been awesome. Why wouldn’t you kiss him?”
“You know I don’t kiss in public.”
“I’m not public.”
“Yeah, well, you’re my little sister, so it’s an even harder no.”
She fell back onto my bed. “Tell me about your first kiss.”
I dropped the brush on the floor. “My first kiss ever, or with Cole?”
“Cole. Why would I care about the rejects?”
“Why do you need to know?”
“Because that’s what sisters do—talk about boys and kissing and that kind of thing.”
I bent, picked up the brush, and tossed it onto my dresser, glaring at her. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“Don’t be lame. We need to share our life moments with one another. We’re all each other has.”
I looked at the ground, feeling guilty for reasons I didn’t understand. “Will you hang on a minute?” I asked. “I forgot to tell Cole something.”
“Alright, but when you come back, I want to hear about the kiss.”
I left the apartment and ran up the stairs. I couldn’t believe I was doing this, but I couldn’t turn my entire life into a lie either. Crossing my arms and wondering how I’d gotten here, I knocked on Cole’s door.
Run, run, run. That’s what my body was telling me.
The door creaked open, and he peeked out. “Hey,” he said, opening the door wider. “Come in.”
I stepped inside and stared around the front room in shock. “I’m guessing you grew up with a maid and now you don’t know what to do with your messes?”
He gave a half-grin. “I keep meaning to clean up.”
I could practically picture his routine. Come home, strip in the middle of the room, toss clothes wherever they landed, then ignore them until laundry day. A few empty water bottles sat on the coffee table beside an old pizza box.
“How can one person—never mind…”
“What brings you up?”
“Sorry to get you out of bed,” I said, noticing his messy hair and pajamas.
“I wasn’t asleep. What can I do for you?”
I took a deep breath. “Alyssa wants to know about our first kiss. I pretty much told her it was none of her business, but she’s insulted that I won’t confide in her. Some kind of sister code or something. I figure we need to get our story straight in case others ask.”
He scratched his head and shrugged. “Best way to do most things is to tell the truth as much as possible.”
“Yeah? Well, we don’t have a truth there, so that doesn’t help.”
His hand came up and brushed behind my head, fingers sliding through my hair. “We could, though.”
I sucked in a breath as butterflies erupted in my stomach. Not light, happy butterflies. Crazy butterflies on caffeine. And why couldn’t I breathe right?
His head tilted closer, and my eyes dropped to his lips. “Your call,” he murmured.
There were only a few inches between us. I could run and tell Alyssa to mind her business and go to bed—or I could move forward. My hands curled into fists, and I leaned in, brushing my lips softly against his.
The butterflies went wild.
I pulled away almost as soon as it started. Cole just watched me with an expression I couldn’t read. His hand dropped to his side. I was embarrassed—and wishing I’d made the kiss last a little longer at the same time.
With words refusing to form, I turned and hurried away.
Cole
I didn’t know how long I stood there staring at the door after Sadie left. I’d kissed my share of women, but none of them had ever knocked the air out of me like that soft, almost-there kiss Sadie just gave me.
I could be impulsive—obviously—but I was almost sure it meant something. That she had to mean something. I wondered if she was the person I could actually spend the rest of my life with.
Crazy? Maybe.
I wasn’t sure she’d ever choose me without the money. This whole marriage thing was just a way for her to have a better life, and I probably didn’t factor into the equation. I was just the step she needed.
And that was fine. That was the agreement. The agreement I had initiated.
The stupid agreement.
Sadie
When I got back to the apartment, Alyssa was doing the dishes.
She looked over her shoulder, and I tried to give a smile that didn’t look guilty.
So many feelings were rushing through me, I didn’t even know where to start untangling them.
The butterflies were still there—fluttering in full chaos—but underneath them was embarrassment.
That kiss had probably seemed pathetic to Cole. I’d leaned in like a scared little girl, all hesitation and nerves. He was probably laughing about it now, wondering what on earth he’d gotten himself into.
“I didn’t forget what we were talking about, if that was your plan,” Alyssa said.
“Did it ever occur to you that I don’t want to talk about it?”
“Come on. It couldn’t have been that bad.”
I twisted my mouth to the side. It hadn’t been bad, just… small? Was that the right word? The explosion in my stomach had been anything but small.
“It’s not exciting,” I finally said.
“Who cares? Just tell me.”
“And are you going to tell me if Hunter kisses you after Homecoming?”
She grinned. “You know I will.”
I sighed. Alyssa had never been as reserved as I was about things like this.
“We were talking, and he put his hand behind my head. I’m sure he knew I was nervous because he moved closer and waited for me. I kissed him, and that was that. See? Nothing exciting.”
She tossed the dishrag into the sink and turned to me. “Did you get dizzy? Stomach spin? Chills? Come on, Sadie, give me something.”
I laughed softly, wishing I’d let the kiss last longer. “I got crazy butterflies.”
“Does he still give you butterflies, or are you over that part?”
“Over it? I’m almost sure you can’t get over kissing Cole Hart. I feel bad for any girl who’s ever had to.”
Her mouth curved up. “That’s what I want to hear.”
“I’m sure it is. Now go to bed. We’re going dress shopping tomorrow.”
Her eyes lit up. “What? Really? But you don’t have a job.”
“Cole gave me some money. I feel a little funny about it, but I want you to have the night you’ve dreamed about.”
“Cole is awesome! Why feel funny? Shouldn’t people getting married help each other?”
“I suppose.” Actually, I was sure of it. The only problem was that he wasn’t benefiting in any way. I was the charity case in this arrangement. He was helping me, and I was letting him. Sure, he needed to get married, but he could find anyone for that.
The next morning Cole came over with donuts and chocolate milk. He set it on the table, and Alyssa bounced over, led by her nose. “Cole, you are the absolute best.”
He grinned. “I try.”
“We’re all cool, right?” Alyssa asked, grabbing a donut and glancing back up at him.
“Of course we’re cool, why?”
“I egged your door, and hit the ceiling, and… all that other stuff. I never would have done it if I’d known it was you.”
“I probably deserved some of it. We’re good. I guess I could have been more quiet, even if the two of you do have super sensitive ears.”
I put my hands on my hips. “Sensitive ears? What were you doing up there? It sounded like an earthquake.”
“I was just jump roping.”
“During math time.”
He grinned. “Sorry.” He didn’t look sorry.
“Is your apartment unlocked? I’m going to go up there and jump and see what you think.”
He laughed. “Go ahead. It’s unlocked.”
I ran upstairs and into his apartment, then I jumped up and down as hard as I could. He was going to have to admit he was at least partly in the wrong.
Cole
I cringed as Sadie jumped around upstairs.
“Was I really that loud?” I asked Alyssa.
“Louder.”
“Wow. It sounds worse down here than it did up there. Sorry.”
She shrugged. “It’s fine. We’re past it, like you said.”
I crossed my arms and tried to look stern. “I’m guessing Sadie doesn’t know about the music?”
She gave a guilty smile. “Nope.”
My guess? As soon as Sadie left the house and Alyssa knew I was home, she’d been shoving her speakers against the ceiling and blasting Justin Bieber.
“Are you going to tell her?” she asked.
“No, but you need to be more careful. I could’ve gone to management and Sadie would’ve taken the hit, not you.”
She picked up a chocolate-covered donut. “I didn’t think about that. Only revenge.”
“How long do you think she’s going to keep jumping?” I let a small smile slip and looked up at the ceiling.
“Until she feels like she’s made her point. We normally wouldn’t have cared, but you always did it when we were trying—and failing—to do math.”
“Sorry about that. Where’s your broom?”
Alyssa tilted her head, confused, but fetched the broom. I took it and hit the ceiling a few times. “Hey! Quiet up there!” I yelled in my best cranky-neighbor voice.
Alyssa giggled, and the jumping stopped.
A minute later Sadie came in, breathing hard from all the jumping.
“Point made,” I said.
She smiled. “Good.”
I wanted to pull her into my arms, but I didn’t want to scare her off. Instead, I picked up the donut box and held it out.