Chapter 4
FOUR
Mason
I threw myself onto my bed, exhaustion dragging me down. I’d stayed up late adjusting cameras again, not wanting to change the habit, in case it tipped off Vince that we knew he was watching our system. Brooke had planted her program and told me it would sound an alert once it located him.
A weight settled on my chest, and my mind whirred.
My talk with Brooke about Aaron had stirred up feelings I’d tried hard to push down.
My breath came shorter and quicker as bangs and crashes echoed through my head.
I reached for my control. Desperate to hold the memories back.
But everything was crowded close and pushing at the surface.
My bedroom faded away as the image of Aaron signaling me to move in rose.
It was so hauntingly real that I felt everything.
Calm on the surface but checking everything.
My awareness of the building we were approaching dialed in.
Aaron confirmed it was clear before motioning for me to run across the opening between the rocks and the bunker.
I slipped inside and did a sweep but found nothing. A feeling twisted my gut and told me something was wrong. There should be people here. Our intel had revealed the hostages were held in the basement, but there was nothing.
I clicked my radio to signal Aaron I was retreating, but a loud bang, followed by an explosion covered anything I might have said.
Walls crashed around me, blocking my exit.
Another explosion rocked what remained, and I staggered to the side to avoid falling debris.
I tripped, falling over a steel rod that jutted from pieces of the building.
It pierced through my uniform, through my skin, and out the other side of my thigh.
I roared, my bear rising, instinct urging him to shift, to protect me.
But I couldn’t. Not with the rod running through me. If I did, I’d tear my leg apart.
I forced away the pain, focusing on getting the rod out of my leg. The injury would be slow to repair itself, even for a shifter, but eventually it would fully heal. I just needed to get loose.
I screamed as I pushed against the debris to slide myself off the rod, pain slicing through me. But I was blocked from clearing it. A piece of debris had fallen near the end of the rod, leaving too little space for me to fit.
“Mason!” Aaron’s voice sounded far away, barely audible over the rushing in my ears. The wall that slanted over me creaked, threatening to fall. “Mason, where are you? Call out if you can hear me.”
“Here.” I croaked out the word, barely hearing it myself. I cleared my throat and tried again. “Here!”
“I hear you.” A minute later he was by my side, swearing as he took in my position. “I need to lift this debris. Be ready to move. I won’t be able to hold it long.”
He grunted, straining against the piece blocking me, but it wouldn’t move. The wall above us creaked ominously. My voice was raspy as I forced out the words I needed to say. “Leave me. Get out before the wall collapses.”
“Don’t be an idiot. I’m not leaving you behind.” He turned, bracing his back against the debris. He yelled as he pushed with everything he had. “Now!”
I shoved myself backwards, screaming in pain as my skin ripped where it had closed around the rod when my body had tried to heal itself. I flopped onto the floor as Aaron’s feet slid out from under him, the piece of debris crashing back down. He slid his arm around me, helping me stand.
“We need to move,” he said. “Come on, Mason. You can do it.”
An alarm sounded; the beeping burst through the memory, which faded, slipping from me just as the wall creaked one last time.
I shot up in bed, sweat pouring off of me as my chest heaved with frantic breaths. My alarm clock blared its annoying beep over and over, clearing the last of the nightmare away. Except it hadn’t been a nightmare, because nightmares weren’t real.
I dropped my head into my hands, scrubbing my face, as if trying to wipe the memory away.
But nothing would ever do that. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood, stumbling to the shower and turning it on.
My thigh ached, reminding me that the dream was real.
I stepped beneath the water fully clothed, letting the pounding cold wake me and take me further away from the memory that had plagued my sleep.
When my body started shivering, I shut off the water and dragged off my wet clothes, leaving them in the bottom of the tub. After a quick swipe with the towel, I grabbed the first clothes my hands landed on in my closet.
Someone knocked on my front door. I frowned as I went to answer it, wondering which of my brothers it was. Something must be wrong if they were at my cabin instead of waiting for me to arrive at my workshop. I opened the door and froze when I saw Brooke standing there.
“Hope I didn’t wake you. When I was in your system yesterday, I noticed you usually log in around this time.”
“No, I was up already.” I stayed in the doorway staring at her. She looked fresh and well-rested. “Why are you here?”
“I’m your shadow, remember.” She tilted her head, eyes squinting as she studied me. “Are you okay? You look kind of rough.”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I’m fine. Just didn’t sleep well.”
“Have you had coffee yet?” She nudged me out of the doorway, her soft hands on my body sending the blood rushing through my veins.
I held back the instinct to take her in my arms, fighting my bear, which roared inside me.
It wanted out. It wanted our mate. I couldn’t have her, but I needed to protect her.
If Vince learned what she was to me, he would use her to hurt me.
She guided me to the couch and pushed me to sit down before crossing over to the kitchen. She opened cupboards until she found my coffee and turned on the pot. Soon, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee reached me, helping me to finish waking up.
“How do you take it?” She called from the kitchen.
“Black.”
“That’s easy.” She handed me a mug and sat next to me, her perceptive gaze studying me again. “Now, what’s really wrong?”
Brooke
Mason took a slow sip of his coffee, delaying his response. I watched him thinking, figuring out what to tell me. What lies to say.
“If you’re not going to tell me the truth, don’t bother.” I wrapped my hands around my warm mug, inhaling deeply the scent of coffee. “I think we’ve moved beyond lying.”
He stared into his mug, fingers flexing around it. A flash of vulnerability slid across his face. “I had a nightmare.”
The word had a heavy weight to it. Was it a nightmare, or had he experienced a flashback? I’d read a little about PTSD after Aaron enlisted, wanting to be prepared if he struggled when he came home. Concern rose. “Was it because of me?”
His brow furrowed. “You?”
“My coming here and stirring up old memories you’d rather forget.” It was something I hadn’t considered before arriving. I’d been focused so intently on what I wanted, I hadn’t considered the impact it would have on anyone else.
“It might have brought things closer to the surface, but the memories are always there.” He shifted on the couch, rolling his shoulders as if he could shake the memories off of where they lay, heavy on him.
He took another sip of coffee before putting his mug on the side table.
“There is something I need to tell you.”
His reluctance was obvious, the words sounding as if he had dragged them out. My breath quickened. Had he changed his mind? Would he tell me about Aaron? I struggled to keep my voice calm. “Anything.”
He leaned forward, hands clasped and elbows on his knees. He kept his gaze trained on the floor. “What do you know about shifters? Specifically, about mates?”
My brows drew together. “Not much. I assume it has something to do with relationships.”
“Shifters have something we call a fated mate. It’s the person fate picked for us. Our everything.” His shoulders rose and fell once, twice, three times. “The surest way to hurt a shifter is to hurt their mate.”
I stayed quiet, waiting for him to continue. It seemed off topic, but I sensed there was more to come. It took several minutes before he spoke again, his eyes still locked on the floor.
“I’m telling you this because if Vince realizes you’re my mate, he’ll probably shift his target to you.”
It took a moment for his words to fully register. When they did, the breath rushed out of my body. My heart pounded as I considered the implications. Did this explain my attraction to him? The pull he’d had on me from the very start? But if it were true, why was he just now telling me?
He didn’t seem overly thrilled about it. I pictured his brothers with their mates, and I could see what he meant by the everything description. But he wasn’t acting like I was his everything. I wasn’t sure I even wanted him to.
I picked my words carefully. “You’re unhappy about it.”
His shoulders stiffened, and he raised his gaze for the first time, expression bleak. “It’s not that simple. As a shifter, I want you more than anything. But you want to know about Aaron, and I can’t… won’t tell you. It would always be between us.”
“Shouldn’t I have a say in this?” I didn’t know what my say would be, but an ache flooded my heart at his finality.
“There are things that would change any feelings you might have for me. I’m broken, and there’s no fixing me.” His jaw firmed, eyes darkening. “But I promise you, if Vince tries to get to you, I will protect you. I won’t let my past destroy your future.”
“I don’t believe you’re broken.” I gave in to instinct and cupped his cheek with my hand. He hadn’t shaved this morning, and his stubble was rough against my palm. Still, touching him felt right. “But if you are, it just gives you somewhere to start healing.”
He gripped my wrist as if to pull my hand away but instead held it in place and leaned into my palm. “I wish it were that easy.”
“Of course it’s not easy. Breaks never are.
But you know what happens when a broken bone heals?
It grows back stronger until the body is ready for it to return to normal.
It doesn’t heal weaker than before.” I stroked his cheek with my thumb.
“I believe that’s true for other breaks too. It just takes time and effort.”
His eyes closed, and his throat gulped. When he reopened them, there was a yearning that reached out and grabbed me. It made me want to follow this mate thing to its end. But part of me held back. Was Mason right that my brother would always be between us? Could I let my search for the truth go?
I was alone, but if I were Mason’s mate, that would change.
I would have him and his family. Plenty of people to erase the loneliness that was so often my companion.
Briefly, my imagination wandered and drew images of what the future could hold if Mason and I accepted each other.
My clothes next to his in the closet, family dinners with his brothers and their mates, and knowing where I belonged.
Then Mason drew my hand away from his face, holding it briefly before letting me go. “I wish things were different. That we didn’t have the past hanging over our heads. You’ll always resent me.”
“I don’t understand why you won’t tell me.” I drew in a shuddering breath. “From your reaction, I’m guessing it’s not pretty, but not knowing is worse. I keep imagining what happened, and it tears me apart.”
He pulled me into his arms and held me tightly. His embrace was warm, comforting, and right. It convinced me that we could work through anything. I didn’t believe either of us could walk away from it.
When he finally pulled back, he pressed his lips to my forehead, lingering there for a few seconds before turning from me. “I’m sorry, Brooke.”
The words stabbed at my heart. I didn’t know what he was apologizing for. Maybe for Aaron, for not giving me answers, or for not accepting me as his mate. Maybe for all of it. All I knew was I couldn’t stay here. I needed to be alone to figure out what I wanted to do next.
I stood, movements wooden, and left, closing the door quietly behind me. Without knowing how, I arrived back at my cabin.
When I stepped inside, I leaned my forehead against the door, stomach threatening upheaval as I wished things were different.
That Aaron had survived, and I’d met Mason through him.
Or that Mason would get rid of this big secret hanging between us.
Instead, he insisted on keeping my brother’s ghost in the middle of our mate bond.
I turned from the door, took a single step forward, and froze. My suitcase had been moved.
I scanned the cabin, cataloguing anything else out of place. There was nothing. Stepping forward cautiously, I checked the bathroom and the closet, but no one was here. Then I grabbed my bag that was now on the bed.
The ringing of a phone startled me. I pulled out my cell, but it was dark. I followed the ringing and found a basic cellphone on the nightstand. The ringing stopped but immediately started again. I picked it up slowly, bringing it to my ear. “Hello?”
“Brooke. Thank you for taking my call.” The slight drawl told me the caller was a local.
“Who is this?”
“Vince. I believe you were looking for me.” Rustling came over the phone. “You shouldn’t be at Shifter Ranch. You won’t get what you’re after there.”
“Why not?”
Bitterness coated his voice. “Mason will never admit the truth.”
I sank onto the bed, ignoring the warning in my gut. “What’s the truth?”
“It’s Mason’s fault. He’s the reason your brother is dead.”