Chapter 30 Taera
Taera
By helping him, Nikolai means walking down passage after passage and standing beside him as he studies the engravings on the wall. He quickly learns the names of the blossoms, and I’m left to wait, restlessly, still holding his hand.
I’m calmer than I should be. The whole situation feels surreal, like I’ve stayed up too late and reality is blending with snippets of a dream. I should be frustrated, or upset, being so physically close to a magician. Instead, I’m strangely neutral.
I guess my mind is finally breaking.
Nikolai tugs me along with gentle, absentminded movements.
He seems to just consider me an extension of his arm—in contrast to my acute awareness of his palm clasping mine: the pleasant hum between our skin.
While he’s focused on the walls, I sometimes glance at our linked fingers and try to wrap my head around touching a magician.
Illicit. Unbelievable. Ordinary.
After what feels like an hour, I start reaching out to touch the glass flowers myself, tracing the petals. If I’m going to stay here for—I don’t want to think about how long… I have to get past my fear of glass.
Nikolai leads me down yet another hallway, embedded with floral carvings, and I trail my fingers along the wall. My hand falls right through.
“Wha—” I lurch away. Nikolai’s grip steadies me.
“What is it?” He looks at me, and I point to where my hand disappeared. He studies the section for a moment, murmuring, “lavender” when he identifies the flowers, then sticks his own hand through the wall. It disappears up to the wrist.
I shiver and suppress the urge to yank him away. But he pulls his hand out a moment later, holding a glass lilac.
“Interesting,” he murmurs.
What is it with these flowers?
We continue along the passage until he spots a lilac, tiny and engraved, on our left. His hand skims the wall until it disappears once again, and he pulls out a rose.
“What are these?” I ask.
“Clues.” He twirls the flower back and forth between his fingers. “Lark, lily, robin, rose, lilac…”
“L’s and R’s,” I say. “For left and right?”
Nikolai stares at me, bewildered, then groans. Finally, he starts to laugh. “Of course it’s dead easy.”
I’ve gleaned enough from his mutterings to have made out a few rhymes. “Where does your poem lead?”
Nikolai doesn’t respond, his eyes distant as he murmurs, “In lanes beyond the lilies fair…”
We drift down the hallway until Nikolai spots a lily.
We turn left.
“Where roses show their petals bare…”
“There.” I point to the rose. Nikolai grins at me, and we turn right.
I’m not sure if I should help him, but otherwise this might take hours. And it seems worth staying on his good side. How much harm can a children’s poem cause?
“In sunshine gold the robins play,” Nikolai continues, and when I locate the etching of the bird, we take a right.
The poem is long and meandering. It takes us around dozens of turns before we reach a final, tongue-twisting line about rhododendrons. When we turn the final corner, I gasp.
We’re no longer in a maze; the walls are no longer glass.
We’re surrounded by bookcases. The library is a perfect circle, with a ladder that rotates from the center like a sundial.
Shelves twist as high as I can see, laden with heavy, leather-bound books.
So much knowledge in one place, like a reminder of the studies I never embarked on.
I feel wretched.
I remain rooted at the entrance, even as Nikolai takes a step inside and our linked hands stretch taut.
“What is this place?” I ask.
“The Library of the Labyrinth. I wasn’t sure it was even real.” His voice is hushed, reverent. He belatedly notices my hesitation, looking back at me with shining eyes. “Will you help me?”
“Are we even allowed in here?” I whisper.
“We found it, didn’t we?” Another non-answer.
I try to ignore the heaviness in my chest, and I step into the library. It’s breathtaking: a looming tower of wisdom. I track the titles, none of them in languages I recognize, let alone read. Books spiral up around us on a single, never-ending shelf.
I glance back.
The door is gone.
My heart accelerates.
“There.” He points a dozen shelves up. He grins at me boyishly, like he’s forgotten all the lies and tension between us. “That’s the one.”
“How do we get to it?” I whisper.
He waves his free hand dismissively, stepping up to the ladder. He swivels it a quarter turn, then steps onto the first rung before he seems to remember that we’re still connected by the hand.
“Climb with me.” He grins.
Easier said than done.
The ladder is narrow, and stepping onto it requires leaning against his side. I have to trust his hand to anchor me every time I grab for a new handhold. It’s nerve-racking and more awkward every time my shoulder bumps into his.
“Almost there,” he murmurs, his tone low and rich.
I refuse to shiver in response, instead focusing on not falling off my side of the ladder.
Nikolai leans over to retrieve a faded volume from the shelf.
The ladder tilts, my stomach lurches, and he just tucks the book under his arm, and we reverse our awkward shuffle until my feet finally touch solid, reassuring ground.
I release the nervous air trapped in my lungs, taking a step away from him and spreading out our hands between us.
“This is it.” Nikolai gazes down at the ancient book. It could be some deadly spellbook. And I’ve just helped him acquire it.
The sight strikes a note of panic in me. Then the floor shakes.
It’s like the belly of the Halls is rumbling, hungry for us. Blood pounds in my ears. Nikolai is still grinning like he’s insane.
Run, he mouths.
We dash through the door—which has appeared again. His legs are longer than mine, and he keeps me from tripping as he drags me faster. We race down dark, narrowing glass hallways and skid around corners.
What’s happening? What did Nikolai take?
My instincts take over, and we flee for our lives.
The rumbling fades into the distance—thank the desert—and my chest is heaving when we finally slow. I catch my breath alongside Nikolai, whose face is flushed. We round a bend, and a shimmering bubble bobs in the air.
I scowl at it.
“Would you like to do the honors?” Nikolai’s eyes twinkle with laughter. His good mood is infectious, especially after the exhilaration of running. But still…
“Are you serious?” I raise my brows. Then, when he doesn’t react, I hold up our joined hands.
He squeezes mine, grinning at me. “I have a good feeling about this one.”
I groan. “It’s all yours.”
It’s not like this could get any worse.
Nikolai lifts his hand, pops the bubble, and silver confetti rains down on us. I wisely hold my breath this time.
“Not so bad,” he says. A glint of motion catches my eye. The blue marble is bouncing up the wall beside us like a tiny, excited rabbit.
“What does it do?” I ask.
“Maybe it leads us somewhere,” he muses.
“False.” The word is one pure tone, like a note on a flute.
Nikolai chuckles. “Oh no.”
Footsteps echo down the hall.
“Chaser.” Nikolai grimaces, shooting me an apologetic smile. He’s positively a ray of sunshine since he got his hands on that book, unnerving me.
“Maybe we can get away?” I glance around.
“False.”
I frown at the little marble. How could it—
A pair of yellow pants come jogging around the corner, carrying a beady-eyed boy whose smile grows wide with delight. “You, there!”
“You caught us.” Nikolai smiles, far too pleased for someone who’s just lost a game. He shoots me a mischievous smile, like we’ve done something illicit.
I frown. What book did he take? I peer over, but there’s no book in sight. His free hand is empty, relaxed.
“What?” He winks.
I narrow my eyes. “Where did—”
Nikolai squeezes my hand and my palm tingles.
“Don’t ask.” His voice in my ear makes me shiver.
“I’ll escort you out,” says the chaser.
There are surprisingly few turns between us and the arch we first passed through. The blue marble bobs after us, but it seems harmless enough. I stay silent, still wondering what he found in the Library of the Labyrinth.
“Better luck next time.” The chaser waves us through the arch, looking almost as satisfied as Nikolai.
An excited mob of students crowd the glass dome beyond, stalling us. A short boy runs past us, making frantic nasal noises and pawing at the blank patch of skin where his mouth should be. I stare.
“Another hex,” Nikolai says, and a student passes who doesn’t seem to be able to walk, only hop. “See, it could have been worse.”
Personally, I think holding hands with Nikolai is still bottom of the list. Until I see two girls walking awkwardly with their heads tilted together, muttering and swearing at each other.
Their hair appears to have joined at the ends, creating a continuous arc of blonde tangles from one girl’s head to the other.
That looks worse. I don’t know whether to be horrified or to laugh.
“Niko!” someone squeals. Jayden and Filla bound up, latching onto his free arm. I try to ignore them, as they do me, while Nikolai smiles and congratulates the two second-years on whatever trinkets they found in the maze.
“Nikolai, is that you?” Jezebel is suddenly here.
“Belle.” Nikolai flashes a dazzling smile. I stiffen.
“Niko almost had to kiss me.” Filla sighs dramatically. “To get past a puzzle, of course.”
Jezebel chuckles, a low sultry sound that vibrates right through her barely covered anything. “Well, isn’t that sweet.”
Her breasts bounce beneath their black lace. Her boldness baffles me, and I’m filled with something that tastes uncomfortably like envy. I try to imagine strutting around in nothing but lace, without bursting into flames of mortification.
Nikolai gives me a funny look.
“And the little mouse made it out, after all,” Jezebel coos at me. “Did you two have fun?”
He chuckles. “Well, Taera didn’t particularly—”
“I had a great time,” I cut in, trying to match Jezebel’s cool indifference.
“False.” The blue marble whistles out, making me start.
“Aww, a truth-teller.” Jezebel smirks, her eyes flitting to our joined hands. “And a hex, too? Don’t worry, darling, Niko won’t bite. Unless you ask him to.”
I glare at Jezebel, grinding my teeth together. Her taunts shouldn’t bother me, and I’ll only make a fool of myself if I snap back at her. Remembering that I’m the one who knows about the secret book from the library, and not her, I feel a flicker of satisfaction. It’s irrational.
“That’s enough,” Nikolai says. He squeezes my hand, and I realize I’ve been clamping down on his fingers hard enough to turn them white.
“Done so soon, Niko? You usually last longer.” Jezebel winks at him.
“My source is done for the day,” he says.
I’m not his source. I huff out a breath, but his humiliating statement still makes my cheeks burn.
Jezebel’s face transforms, suddenly dripping with pity. “Poor thing. The labyrinth must have scared her.”
I want to spit at her. Why does Nikolai let her treat me like this? My contempt for him floods back: the vivid memory of how he embarrassed and abandoned me to make a painful idiot of myself in my first class. How he didn’t even think it was wrong to lie to me about returning home.
He’s already leading me away, pulling me through the crowd.
I can’t believe I just spent hours following him through the labyrinth—that I let his closeness send flutters through my stomach. I hate myself for it.
“Taera.” Nikolai’s tone is a warning.
I don’t respond. He doesn’t say anything more, just drags me down a hallway. It isn’t empty, either. A group waves at us, and Nikolai sighs.
“Niko! Tae!” Annie calls. She’s standing with Omi and the broody one—Sasha. “We found an endless bowl of chocolate if you want a treat. How was the labyrinth?”
“Fine,” Nikolai mutters.
“False.”
“Two hexes.” He groans. “We’ll see you later.”
I don’t catch Annie’s babbling consolations because Nikolai pulls me after him. His furry ears are flattened back as he guides me through a courtyard I’ve never seen before. Blood glass frosts the edges of the clear glass bricks.
“What’s the rush?” I glare at the back of his head, but he yanks me down a series of semi-familiar passages and through the obsidian door to his chambers.
Only after Nikolai pulls me inside and the door shuts behind me does he face me. His eyes dig into me like hard jade, pulsing to the beat of the magic thrumming between our palms.
“Your magic is screaming.” The hum between our fingers erupts, brightening into a molten glow that smolders so hot it hurts.
I hiss, but Nikolai’s jaw tightens and the light gutters, then fades.