Chapter 2 #2
“Oh, I have no idea. I suppose you’re taking me deep into your lair, where no one else will ever find us.
” I pretend to shiver. “A top-secret underground bunker? Oooh, maybe an abandoned warehouse with cement floors and scary rope suspension systems. No, no, I know! A hidden cave behind a waterfall!”
“You know what they say about sarcasm, darling?” he asks with his own brand of sarcasm. The coldness in his eyes makes my teeth chatter.
“What’s that?” I ask, pretending he doesn’t terrify me.
“It’s a form of contempt. A method of hiding one’s true feelings. A form of great disrespect. And you know how I feel about disrespect, Cosette.”
My eyes grow misty again. I hope he doesn’t notice.
It’s so much more difficult to harden my heart when he calls me by name.
I remember what it was like, being pinned beneath him, helpless under his harnessed weight, overpowered by him but safe in every way.
I remember the way he’d give me a look—just a look to let me know I’d crossed a line and delicious punishment would follow.
A fixed stare, a tight, cold expression.
A raised eyebrow or a subtle shake of his head.
The slightest hint of disapproval set my heart to pounding.
But he isn’t flirting with me this time.
Punishment at his hands now wouldn’t electrify my senses and end with my back arching in climax as he wrenched orgasm after orgasm from my body.
No. This time, any discipline he inflicts will be to teach me a lesson.
To remind me that my life is disposable.
No longer mine.
He doesn’t know the truth.
“I do know how you feel,” I say in what I hope is a nonchalant voice. “I know very clearly how you feel about disrespect. I know how you feel about loyalty and trust, too. And I know why I’m here, Lyam. So let’s not waste each other’s time.”
When I turn my face away, he reaches for my chin again. His fingers trace my skin, as if committing it to memory. If he doesn’t feel this electric charge between us, he may not be the animal I just thought of him as, but rather a vampire or zombie, completely devoid of any human feeling at all.
How could someone so cruel burn with such fire?
How could someone who wants to hurt me look like he wants to hold me?
For one fraction of a second—less than one beat of my heart—he looks as if he’s going to kiss me.
He always did love it when I gave him chase.
“Good. I’m glad we’re on the same page.”
I’m holding my breath. Trembling in anticipation, scared of what he’ll do next. Scared of what he won’t.
And then he’s driving. I’m back in my seat, shivering with cold because he moved away.
As he pulls away, I'm left reeling. Pulse racing.
I shouldn't want this—I shouldn't want him—but I can't deny the way he pulls me in.
Eventually the ache of his rejection will stop, I tell myself. It has to.
I look out the window and wonder.
How long before he unburies my secrets?
And when he does…
How will I survive?
Fuck the Gerards for ever making me feel wanted and loved.
Fuck their friends, who made me feel like I had a home.
And fuck their enemies who built an insurmountable wall between me and the only people I ever loved.
I know where my loyalty lies now. I know what I need to do.
And as Lyam looks at me with a mix of desire and something deeper, something dangerous and forbidden, he triggers every survival instinct in my body.
Run.
If only I could.
He turns away and places a call.
“Yes, sir?”
“I want the final touches we discussed in place for my guest room.”
“Yes, sir. Straight away.”
I clench my jaw and look ahead of us, where construction workers in bright yellow navigate trucks, and one man is in the middle of the road directing traffic.
Lyam curses under his breath and rolls down his window.
“What?” Under the solar glare of the construction lights, the man directing traffic doesn’t see who’s driving.
“Hey,” Lyam says, his voice friendly and warm. I know that look so well.
I fell for it, too.
He beckons, and the man stomps over to us. It only takes him a few seconds to recognize Lyam. It may be the enormous tattoo of a python on his forearm he notices first.
“My residence is only about five hundred meters from here. I need to get by this construction.” He takes out his wallet and removes a thick stack of euros.
Of fucking course he does.
“I’m so sorry, sir. Just a moment, Mr. Gerard. And no, no, sir, that’s unnecessary.”
“Please, take it,” he says. “I insist.”
I see the flash of fear in the man’s eyes. One does not say no when a Gerard insists.
I roll my eyes and turn away so he doesn’t see me. Just a moment, Mr. Gerard, I mock in my mind. Right away, Mr. Gerard.
God, it’s disgusting how people fall all over themselves giving him what he wants. No wonder he thinks he’s a king.
It’s like an act of Parliament for them to move the barriers, but after a few hushed words with his crew, they all snap into action. They practically salute him.
Gag. Me.
A minute later, we’re driving down the road, I suppose to wherever he’s going to keep me.
“You should do a better job at hiding your contempt,” he snaps.
I didn’t know it was that obvious.
“Oh,” I say with a tight smile. “I’m doing an excellent job.”
To my surprise, he actually smiles. “Enjoy yourself while I’m occupied with my hands on the steering wheel. It’ll be the only time, you know.”
A prickle of fear skates down my spine.
Some people scare others with rage and fury, throwing things, shouting, and causing an uproar.
But I know Lyam. I know Lyam well.
I fear him most when he’s quiet.
His thoughts imprison him. When he stares ahead, I know he’s entrenched in a world of darkness, as if he’s trapped in a nightmare.
We drive the rest of the way to his home in silence.
The atmosphere in the car is suffocating.
The only sounds are the purr of the engine and the rapid beating of my heart.
I’m alone with a man who thought nothing of beating the shit out of a man who crossed him.
I’m alone with a man who despises me. Whose command is always obeyed. A man who’s above the law.
A man who always kills with the first shot.
What have I done?