Chapter 26
MATTEO
Elizabeth has put in her request to take two weeks off work, and I’ve decided to take the same time off.
It might look odd, both of us being away at the same time, but we're all adults here. I'm pretty sure some of the guys have realized already, even though we try to ignore one another as much as is humanly possible.
Still, the days pass in excruciating torture because we can’t walk past one another without touching. We keep looking at one another, and meetings with the team are torture. It’s difficult, hiding what we feel for one another, and pretending we’re nothing but professional at work.
One time we were in the kitchen together.
Hands brushing, until a couple of the systems engineers walked in.
Elizabeth nimbly moved away, busied herself with getting something out of the fridge.
I left after refilling my water bottle, but I heard her making conversation with the guys.
They were talking about security on passwords.
I look out of my office once more, and watch Elizabeth sitting with her back to me.
The memory of the weekend comes rushing back.
Heated images flood my mind, bringing back the fevered, scorching hot kisses, our mouths crushed together, tongues dueling.
Her hand on my cock, me palming her breast. Through clothes.
It’s so frustrating.
I'm usually a patient man, but this constant anticipation is starting to wear me down. Every thought seems to circle back to her. I go to bed thinking about her and wake up thinking about her. No matter how much work I throw myself into, I can't seem to get her out of my head.
This woman has affected all of me.
She turns around, and catches me staring at her. A shy smile starting on her lips, and then she looks around the office slowly, turning her back to me.
I wonder if she's thinking what I'm thinking.
Of us together in bed, touching one another, exploring, and …
My cock twitches again, and to my utter delight, Elizabeth walks in, with a folder in her hands.
“We don't have a meeting,” I murmur, closing the door firmly behind her. I wish this wall was opaque so nobody could see in. Instead, I have to keep my distance, paranoid about curious eyes watching us.
Her gaze slowly travels down my body. I feel the heat when it settles over my bulge between my legs.
“We don’t,” she says. “I just needed to see if it was only me.” Her eyes catch mine briefly, before she walks past me, her hand brushing over my cock. She leaves as quickly as she came.
Fuck.
Her touch is like fire, and my hard-on? Bigger. Stiffer. Painful.
I want to see her again, and letting the days pass with us being apart, has been torture. I clear my throat, sit back at my desk, and try to focus my mind on work.
Try to calm my throbbing cock.
After a while, I call Alex into my office. He walks in like he always does, calm and composed, like nothing ever rattles him.
“You wanted to see me?”
I nod toward the chair opposite my desk. “Close the door.”
That gets his attention. He sits down. “What’s up?”
I lean back in my chair. “We've been looking into the tech issues again.”
His expression doesn't change. “Anything new?”
I hesitate. I told Elizabeth that we needed to keep this between ourselves for now, but with me heading to Italy soon, I can't justify keeping my second-in-command in the dark. Alex needs to know.
“Elizabeth thinks it might be an inside job.”
For the first time since entering my office, Alex goes completely still. The reaction lasts less than a second. Then it's gone. “You … what?” His voice climbs half an octave. He shifts in his chair, fingers loosening the collar of his shirt. “Impossible.”
“She's convinced we're looking at someone familiar with the infrastructure. Someone who knows their way around our systems.”
He inhales a breath. “She could be wrong.”
“She could be.”
“She's smart, but that doesn't mean she's right.”
I shrug. “Maybe.”
He rises from his chair and looks out of my windowed wall at the open-plan workspace. He's the only person left on this floor who still wears shirts and ties every day. A holdover from the culture before I took over the department.
His hands disappear into his trouser pockets. “This doesn't make any sense.”
“Tell me about it.”
He turns to me. “Who do you think it is?”
I hesitate. “Joel's done a couple of things lately that aren't sitting right with me.”
Alex turns sharply. “Joel? Are you serious?”
“I can't prove anything.”
“But … Joel?”
“He was in the server room recently.”
Alex says nothing.
“Long after everyone else had gone home,” I add.
He scratches his jaw. “And?”
“He looked surprised to see us there.”
“Us?”
“Elizabeth and me.” My breath still as I wait for his reaction. Instead, Alex seems focused on something else entirely.
“Joel almost never stays late.”
I nod. “My point exactly.” I slide my chair back and stretch out my legs. “He told me you asked him to run a backup for you. It was on one of the days you left early.”
Alex looks away, his eyes narrowing. “I remember that day,” he says, as if he's recalling it slowly.
“Could he have been telling the truth?”
“Maybe.” He pauses. Then shakes his head. “Actually, no. I can run backups remotely.”
“I know. That’s what caught my attention.”
Alex walks back to the chair and sits down again. “That's concerning.”
I nod. “Very.”
“It still doesn't make sense.”
“No.” I agree. I’ve come to the same conclusion, mulling this idea in my head ever since Elizabeth and I discussed this.
“He's a good employee. Highly valued,” Alex says.
“That's what I thought.” It’s harder on Alex—it’s hard on me, too—to think that one of our own, Joel, could do something like this. But Alex works more closely with the guys than I do. This must be killing him.
He leans back. “Why would he do something like this?”
I rub a hand over my jaw. “I have no fucking idea.” And that's the truth.
I don't know if Joel's involved.
I don't know if Elizabeth is right.
I don't know who's responsible.
All I know is that something isn't adding up.
I hesitate. “I wasn't supposed to say a word, so you must keep this to yourself.”
Alex sits back down, looking like a ghost. “I still can’t believe it. Not Joel. You've got to be shitting me.”
“I’m not. I’m just telling you what Elizabeth and I have talked about, but we can't move on this yet,” I continue. “We need proof. Something concrete. Right now we've got suspicions and circumstantial bullshit.”
Alex nods slowly. “I agree.”
“I'm heading to Italy the week after next to see my mother. Might be a week. Might be longer.”
His eyes lift to mine.
“You'll be in charge while I'm gone.”
“Same as always,” he says, resting a hand on the armrest, and smoothing down his tie with the other hand.
“I need you to keep an eye on Joel.”
He nods firmly this time. “I’ll keep an eye on him. Elizabeth and I will look into things.”
I swipe a hand across my neck, unsure of how to break it to him. “Elizabeth's away too. A friend's wedding in Croatia,” I say casually, unable to meet his gaze.
My cell phone rings just then. I glance at the screen and see that it's from the hospital. Something twists in my gut. “I have to take this.”
Alex promptly gets to his feet. “Everything okay?”
“No idea.”
The moment the door closes behind him, I answer.
The doctor gets straight to the point and explains that they've reviewed the latest results. My tissue-typing results remain favourable. More importantly, the crossmatch testing came back negative.
It’s what he would call a good result. It means I'm a viable donor candidate. He keeps talking, says something about additional screening, consultations, next steps, and surgical evaluations.
The words mesh into a messy blob because I've heard the only part that matters.
I'm compatible.
When the call finally ends, I lower the phone slowly. My hand is shaking. My pulse is racing. For several seconds, I simply stare at my monitor before sinking back into my chair.
Fuck.
I'd been quietly hoping the decision would be made for me. That somewhere along the line, a test would rule me out. That my body would decide this wasn't possible. Instead, it seems perfectly willing to hand over one of my kidneys.
I scrub both hands over my face.
Enzo came over last night with the other piece of news. Good news, as it happens, considering what I’ve just heard.
Zach matched, too.
At least I'm not carrying this alone, not that it makes any of this easier. Another thought flashes in my mind. If I don’t tell them that I’ve matched, Zach will probably step forward.
That would be a terrible thing to do.
It would be a hideous lie, and it would weigh heavily on me. The old man has spies everywhere, and he’d find out, one way or another. Then everyone would hate me.
I scratch my jaw. I feel trapped and cornered, like there’s no way out of this.
But I know exactly what I need.
To see Mama.
Just the thought of seeing her calms me down.
She'll know what to say.
She'll know what to do.
She always does.
A knock sounds on my office door. I look up to see Sonny approaching with a tablet tucked under one arm. Damn. We have an infrastructure meeting. Under normal circumstances, I'd be interested. Today, I couldn't care less.
“Can we reschedule? Sorry,” I ask the moment he steps in. “I’ve got on my plate right now.”
“Sure, boss. No problem. You just let me know when.” His expression softens, like he’s almost as relieved as I am to postpone our meeting.
I sit back, see Elizabeth talking to Alex. It’s almost the end of the day, but with my trip coming up, I have lots of loose ends to tie up. I need to get away, somewhere quiet where I can be alone. I head for the solitude of the server room.
I wasn’t lying to Sonny. I have a lot going on. Too much. Medical issues, technical issues, possible employee sabotage. The idea of giving my kidney to the old man.
And now there’s Elizabeth.
I wonder if I’ve taken too much on. I like my life to run smoothly, but at this moment I’m in the eye of a hurricane and about to be blown away.