24. Rain
Chapter 24
Rain
T hree months later…
Cheese. Just the mere smell of it would send me over the edge and I hated it. For weeks, of course, I’d ignored it because there was no way in hell that this was happening to me.
Until finally I couldn’t ignore the overwhelming urge to vomit every time I tried to put shredded cheese on my omelets.
And omelets.
I didn’t like eggs enough to be making omelets every three minutes.
Hey, I shot a text off to Nora.
I’d also been avoiding my sister. Avoiding everyone actually after the last what…six messy ass months.
Oh, this is unexpected, Nora replied instantly.
I checked the time on the phone and saw it was a little past six, she was probably just leaving Deluca Tech .
Taking a deep breath, I wrote out another text message. Can you come over?
She responded instantly. Of course, I’ve missed you so much. Like family dinners haven’t been the same.
Fuck, she thinks this is a real social call, a sigh escaped from my dry-ass fucking lips.
I wanted to vomit and my lips hurt so bad.
Nora, can you bring a couple of pregnancy tests when you come?
My sibling’s response came immediately. Pregnancy test? Holy fuck, you think you’re pregnant?
I could feel my sister’s excitement over a text and I knew I was anything but excited. I’d never thought about having a child.
Please just bring a few, I’ve been feeling so ill the last few weeks…I haven’t left the house much.
Whoa, Nora responded. Give me an hour, I’m still going on a few budgeting specks for my department. I’ll be there as soon as I can.
Groaning, I tossed my cell phone on the other end of the couch and scrubbed my hands over my face. On the television, the news was talking about all the festivals happening in Seattle in July. All I could think about was how hot it was outside and how I knew seemed to always be super hot.
In fact, I was sitting around in nothing but a T-shirt and some boxer pants.
Matteo’s T-shirt.
Matteo’s baby, I groaned.
I didn’t need a test to tell me that I had that man’s child growing in my stomach.
“I just need to be sure,” I stood up and started to pace when the feeling hit me again.
Getting to the bathroom in just enough time, I started to dry heave. I doubled over the toilet feeling weak, and the next thing I knew acid was surging up my throat. Yellow stomach bile had forced its way up and out of my mouth. Dabbing at my raw chapped lips, the aftertaste had me wanting to wretch again.
Groaning I studied my reflection in the mirror. “Just one time… I knew I never should have fucked that man. Ugh.”
Please, girl, he said all the right things, and then his crazy ass mama showed up, I shook my head and opened the medicine cabinet. Snagging the Vaseline jelly stick from inside, I uncapped it and stormed away while rubbing it over my lips.
“And you know,” I stared down at my stomach. “I never should have even let him get a whiff of my drawers. I should have known it was gonna be some shit with him. At least with regular assholes, I knew what I was getting into. That whole nice guy routine my ass…”
And this had been the entire conversation for a couple of days. Me talking to a barely formed bean who probably didn’t even have a mouth yet.
I paced for a little while longer, feeling thirsty as hell. I’d been in the cycle. Nausea. Vomiting. Nausea.Thirsty. Vomiting.Nausea. Thirsty. I’d eat here and there but I could barely even keep food down.
An hour later Nora was walking through the door, her armes weighed down with a multitude of pregnancy test she could find and concern rolling out of her pores. She spilled them onto my coffee table right next to where my tarot cards lay.
I hadn’t read them since…
Matteo, I finished the thought.
“So…which one should you pee on first?” Nora looked between the pink and white box in one hand and me.
“I want to scream because there is absolutely no way I’m… I can’t be a mom, Nora,” I took a deep breath.
“Pee first, decide that later…”
Snatching the box from my sister, I fought back the urge to cry before heading to the bathroom. This wasn’t my first pregnancy test, but it was my first time knowing without a doubt that the lines would be there.
When I was finished peeing on the stick, I sat it on the bathroom counter and walked out.
Nora was sitting on the couch texting Mason but she stopped when I approached.
“You didn’t mention this to Mason, did you?”
She shook her head, her hair giving a soft sway. She’d taken out her extensions and was rocking a natural bob. “No, just told him I was stopping by.”
Taking a breath I sat down. “Good.”
Nora studied me for a moment. “You know, Rain, you’re not alone in this. But why would you be worried about Mason knowing if you were pregnant?”
Anger flooded my veins immediately and I found myself snapping at my sister. “It’s not Mason’s fucking business, okay.”
Immediately, guilt replaced the anger as Nora’s eyes widened.
“Look ma’am, I was trying to help you the fuck out, okay. You called me…”
Tears pricked my eyes making them sting. “I’m so sorry. I’m such a bitch. And I’ll be a terrible mother. I don’t want Mason knowing because I don’t think I should keep it.”
That did it.
The floodgates opened and I started sobbing uncontrollably my fucking saint of a sister, she was nothing but calm words and warm hugs as she pulled me in close and stroked my hair.
“I think I should spend the night,” she murmured. “Mason can do without me for the night.”
Still sobbing, I nodded. “Please.”
“Besides, he’s headed to Carmine’s house to spar or some shit. The last few months…I need to tell you something,” Nora eased back. “But maybe it can wait till after you check that test…”
I nodded and tried to suck some air into my lungs to get in control of myself. “Okay, I need to get myself together.”
I stood slowly, afraid of what was waiting in my bathroom, but I felt Nora right behind me. Staring down at the test on the counter, my heart began to pound so fucking loud.
And my chest.
It felt so tight.
Violently bright pink lines stared back at me as I clutched at my chest. Nothing was holding me up and I felt myself rushing to meet the floor.
“Oh, Rain!” Nora was beside me in an instant, pulling me into her arms.
It was true. The deed was done.
I was pregnant.
I was pregnant with the Boy Scout’s baby.
“Nora, it was one time…” I sobbed loudly. “One fucking time. And I’m alone. And I don’t know what to do.”
“Shhh, it's going to be okay,” my sister began to rub small soothing circles on my back. “I’m here, and we’ll figure it out, okay.”
Nora would never press me about who the father was. I think we had a good enough connection that she already knew who it was.
Sitting up, I gave her a watery smile. “I’m gonna have to get an OBGYN appointment.”
“I can get the name of one from Brie,” Nora smiled mentioning her boss’s wife.
“Huh?”
“Yup, she’s having a baby too,” Nora smiled.
Quietly, I got to my feet. “I’m not sure I’m having anything. I need…fuck, I need to talk to the father before I decide anything. Not that a man is going to tell me what to do with my own body,” I eyed her.
My sister held up her hands in defense before quietly speaking. “So that was what I was going to bring up earlier. We still don’t have any concrete clues on where Matteo is. But Mason’s been looking, actually, I lied earlier. He and Carmine…they’ve figured out something and they’re running a little mission.”
My palms began to sweat at Nora’s words. “They… think they might be able to track him down, bring him home.”
We walked back out of the bathroom and my sister nodded. “Their mother, Alaska…we all thought she was dead. Turns out she’s just the other side of a coin like their father.”
“Why did she only want Matteo?”
Nora shrugged while I moved to open the fridge, feeling thirsty. Pulling out a bottle of water, I opened it and started to drink.
“I still don’t know. But she has him and she has the codex. But don’t worry…if anyone can find your baby daddy, it's his brothers.”
Water spewed out of my mouth and my eyes grew wide. “Mmmm….what!”
She rolled her eyes and waved me away, turning on my Netflix. “Girl bye…I don’t know what you did to that man, but he’s wanted you in the worst way. Next thing we know you’re on the run with him…p.s. yall made it three days…”
“I’m sorry Little Miss Corsican Secret Keeper…”
Nora whipped around. “Wait…so you know know about them?”
I arched a brow. “Yes, I know know about them…way to not let me know the Boy Scout had a dual entity inside of him.”
My sister grinned. “Well in my defense after the whole saving you incident, you kind of stopped taking my calls. Oooo, have you seen Wednesday, yet?”
Rain was pointing to Wednesday Addams in all her gothic glory and I shook my head before coming to sit down. “Nope. And I’m getting hungry.”
“Okay, let’s order a pizza…”
That did it.
The thought of cheese had me twisting in the wind and I rushed to the bathroom and vomited once more. This time, while I was dry-heaving over my toilet and contemplating my life, I realized that I should have called my sister sooner.
For the first time in three months, the world felt as if it had started to slow down.
Calmly, I wiped my mouth and stared at my reflection. I looked worse for wear. My lips were still chapped and my eyes looked glassy from crying but my Brazillian install looked to perfect.
With a hesitant breath, I lifted my hand and let it linger in the air before gently resting it on my round belly. "We're going to find your father really soon," I murmured, my voice filled with hope. "I think he’ll like the idea of you..." As I spoke, a gentle tune slipped from my lips—a lullaby from the depths of my memory, its origins lost to time. I turned and made my way back to the couch, where I snuggled under a cozy, thick blanket with Rain, the soft fabric enveloping us both in warmth.
For right now, I wasn’t alone.
And maybe Matty would find me in my dreams tonight after months of nothing.
Maybe, I thought trying to keep away any worry that was lingering.