MAVERICK (Carnage MC - New Jersey #2)

CHAPTER 1

Kaya

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, and I’m feeling like…

a pile of shit. A steaming pile of shit.

No, worse than that, but let’s just say I feel horrible.

My stomach is turning for the third time this morning and I swear to God, my normal tan coloring now has a hint of green.

I can’t sleep and my tits are killing me.

Yes, I have every symptom. No, I have not taken a test. Why bother, when I already know what it’s going to say?

If I piss on the damn stick, I’m going to have to face the fact that somewhere along the way, my birth control decided to take a long jump off of a short pier and fail in its one and only damn job.

And since I’m not ready to face that reality, I’m just going to stay here in my borrowed sheets and pretend my life isn’t spiraling out of control.

My phone buzzes from the nightstand and I glare at it.

I ignore it the first time only for it to buzz again and again.

Shit. I grab the offender and swipe it open.

Sophia. Three texts, all reminding me that I agreed to hang with her and her newfound family today.

Canceling sounds really good right about now, but if I do that, she will more than likely pack up her three-year-old twins and haul them over here to check on me. Sometimes having best friends sucks.

Saliva starts pooling in my mouth and the rapid swallowing begins. I throw the blankets aside and run to the bathroom. After spitting, gagging, dry heaving, and making a fourth offering to the porcelain Gods, my stomach finally settles. This is getting ridiculous.

I study my face in the mirror. Yep, definitely a hint of green.

The dark rings under my eyes make it seem like I haven’t slept, when in reality, I’ve been doing quite a lot of it.

I slept in twice this week, which is really unlike me, but puking while sober takes a lot out of a person.

Last night however, I tossed and turned more than anything.

It seems to go from one extreme to the next.

I grab the sides of the cold sink and take in a deep breath. How the fuck did I get here?

Three months ago, I was sharing a duplex with my best friend Sophia and spending my weekends with whoever happened to catch my eye.

Now, I’m sleeping in my other best friend’s craft room while potentially growing a fetus.

This is not how things were supposed to go.

I brush my teeth, thoroughly enjoying the minty refresh my mouth desperately needs and then hop in the shower.

I throw on jeans and a black Henley, which is not exactly the comfort level I want, but sweats and a hoodie might draw too many questions from Sophia.

I need to appear as normal as possible. I’m not ready to tell anyone what I suspect is going on in my uterus.

I just can’t handle the reactions and questions that will come along with it, especially the ones regarding the baby daddy.

Using my key, I unlock Sophia’s front door and push it open. Grayson’s bike is gone so I know he’s already at the clubhouse. I kick off my ballerina flats and put them neatly by the door. “I’m here!” I’m met with the smell of something delicious. Freshly baked. I sniff the air. Cinnamon for sure.

“Be right down.” Sophia calls. And in an instant, I hear the patters of little feet on the stairs. “Slow, guys. I don’t want you falling.”

“Kaya!” Joey and Emily both scream in unison as they rush to me.

“Hello, tiny humans.” I pat them both on the back.

Sophia is smiling as she follows her kids into the living room.

Calling them her kids is kind of a misnomer because she didn’t birth them.

But their mother isn’t in the picture. Sophia met their father through the daycare where she works when the twins had just turned two.

I think she fell in love with them before their father, but now they are one big happy family.

Sophia was always meant to be a domestic goddess.

She knew she wanted kids ever since I’ve known her.

And here she is beaming from ear to ear, wearing a pink apron that says ‘When in doubt pull it out’, with a graphic of an oven with a cake on the rack.

I chuckle. “Did Grayson get you that?” I wave to her apron.

She laughs. “No, I bought it when I realized most of my sweatshirts were stained from cooking.”

“You’ve always been a messy chef.”

She smacks my arm lightly. “I’m hardly a chef.”

“You cook hella better than I do.”

“That’s because you don’t do it. If I didn’t feed you, you were happy eating Ramen and cereal.”

I shrug. It’s true, but her words make my stomach tighten.

If this whole thing is a reality, does that mean I need to learn to cook?

Do I want to learn to cook for the fetus?

Do I even want to keep it? Geez, I’m probably getting ahead of myself.

I sigh and look at the TV where Joey and Em’s focus is.

They are both frozen like the giant screen holds all the secrets in the world, when in reality it’s a show with four pigs celebrating a birthday.

At least, I think they’re pigs, but their heads are shaped like blow-dryers. It’s fucking weird.

“Why does your face look like that?”

I turn to Sophia. “Like what?”

She circles the outside of my face with her fingers. “Like that. Your nose is all scrunched.”

I point to the TV. “Why do those pigs look like hair dryers?”

Sophia glances at the TV until her head goes back as she cracks up. “Oh my God! I’m never going to be able to unsee it now!”

I laugh. “Don’t they though? Like, why do they look like that? Is this what kids watch now?”

Sophia waves for me to follow her to the kitchen, while the kids stay in the living room totally engrossed in the pig show.

Even though my girl has only been living here for a few months, her touches are already everywhere. From the cat welcome mat I stepped on coming in, to her baby blue mixer on the kitchen counter. Sophia is making this place her home. I couldn’t be happier for her.

“It smells amazing in here. What did ya make me?” I ask with a grin.

She raises her brows, smiling, and then turns to the stove.

She slips on a blue oven mitt and pulls out a tray of cinnamon rolls.

The aroma permeates the air and I can’t help but to take another large whiff.

She then shuffles around the kitchen grabbing a bowl with icing and meticulously dribbles it over the tops.

“Ya know it’s Sunday, right?” Sophia asks as she loads the dishwasher.

I shake my head.

She tilts her head. “Sorry, I was told not to take no for an answer.”

“Come on, Soph.”

“Gretchen is coming too. Lexi and Hannah both insisted you be there.”

I roll my eyes. Sophia hands me a cinnamon roll.

She takes one for herself and sits down across from me.

I grab a napkin from the motorcycle napkin holder at the center of the table.

She does the same. We eat in silence. She keeps making eye contact with me and I know she has something to say, but until she speaks, I’m just going to enjoy the gooeyness of this cinnamon roll.

This thing has the tiniest bit of crunch under the icing, but the inside, mm, is so damn delicious.

Sophia wipes her mouth and then tosses the napkin on the table in front of her. “Are you going to tell me what’s happening between you and Maverick or do I need to drag it out of you?”

I’m glad my stomach was feeling good enough to enjoy breakfast, but just the mention of that man, is causing it to start turning all over again.

“Same thing that’s been going on. We screw, he pushes me for more, I shut him down. Basically, the same thing that’s been going on since we met.” I shrug.

She studies me and I hate it. She knows I’m full of shit, but the truth is, what’s going on with him is nothing short of complicated.

We have sex. Great sex. When our bodies come together it’s like an atomic bomb.

It’s rough and hot, loud and explosive, and I’ve never experienced anything like it.

Beyond that? Nothing. I don’t date, never have, not even in high school.

Not because I wasn’t asked, but because I never had the desire.

Sex is simple. It feels good, you get off, and then you move on with your life.

Feelings are messy. I smirk at the thought, because sex is messy too, but feelings can’t be cleaned up with the simple act of a warm shower.

“Kai.” Sophia says softly.

I shake my head again. “I’ll go, but only if we stop talking about him.”

She purses her lips, knowing I have her. I grin and take another bite of the roll.

Carnage is Dogwood Creek’s local motorcycle club.

A few months back, Gretchen and I started hanging out there.

Friday nights are party nights at the clubhouse and being two single women that love nothing more than a great night of drinking and hooking up, we became regulars.

It was all good for a few weeks. No strings attached, unadulterated fun.

That is, until Maverick rolled into town.

The night I met him, is the same night Sophia came with us for the first time.

She got together with Grayson, there was a shooting, and the six foot four beast of a man decided to tell every other guy in the clubhouse that I was off limits to anyone but him.

Apparently, there is some unwritten rule amongst bikers that they can do that.

Once he put a claim on me, no other guy there could touch me, even though we aren’t together.

It doesn’t mean I can’t go get my jollies elsewhere, but I haven’t, which is exactly why I know who possible fetus’s sperm donor is.

The girls at the clubhouse are awesome, which is why I’m agreeing to go. Lexi is the president’s wife, and if I don’t show up, I don’t doubt she would send one of the guys to come get me. No one there takes too kindly to being told no.

Sophia gets up again, pouring two steaming cups of coffee. She hands me one in a blue mug with a smiling cat on it. Before I can ask for cream, she’s placing it on the table. I pour it in slowly, watching the dark liquid turn to a lighter shade of brown.

“Any sign of Bishop or your dad?” I ask.

Sophia closes her eyes and sighs shaking her head. “Nope. Nothing. If my dad really did kill Roger, I’m sure he’s on the run. As far as Bishop? I have no clue. Grayson doesn’t really bring him up.”

“Sorry,” I mutter.

“And before you ask, nothing from my mom either. I hate to say it,” Sophia leans her head forward to check on the kids in the other room, “I’m afraid something happened to her.”

“Really? Cipher hasn’t found anything?”

“No. She hasn’t used her phone, credit cards, or even her car. It’s like she just disappeared.”

“Damn,” I say. “You really think your dad could have hurt her?”

She shrugs. “I want to say no, but at the same time, I never would have thought he was capable of killing Roger either.” She glances around. “Sometimes I feel like Bishop could be listening and it freaks me out. We shouldn’t be talking about this.”

I nod. She’s right. Technically all of this is club business which is off limits to anyone that’s not a member of Carnage, but since it has to do with people Sophia, Gretchen and I have known for years, it muddies the waters a bit.

“How’s work going?”

I smile. Finally, a non-awkward topic. “Good! Same old shit for the most part, though I did have to help a CEO, get a porn virus off his computer. He was beyond frustrated and I couldn’t help but laugh.

No matter what he tried to do, porn would pop up.

Open his email—porn, open a browser—porn, try to restart his computer—porn, by the time I got on the phone with him there were seventy-two windows open.

I could feel his embarrassment through the line.

Seemed like an uptight guy, who was seeing tits for the first time. ”

Sophia chuckles. “Got it all fixed?”

I wave her off. “Of course. He was so grateful; I won’t be surprised if I get flowers, a gift basket, or some kind of bonus out of it.”

“Cinnamon bun!” Joey hollers as he runs into the room.

Sophia’s face lights up. “Yep. Sit down and I’ll get you one. After you finish, we’ll head over to the park for a little bit.”

Joey climbs into a chair. “Can I bring my red ball?”

Sophia nods. Emily joins us. “Kaya, will you push me on the swings?”

“Absolutely!” I say and tap her nose. She giggles.

I don’t know their biological mother, but knowing their father, I would say they both resemble him with their blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

Sophia stepped right into being their step-mom like it was always meant to be.

I wouldn’t be surprised if adoption papers make it official sooner than later.

Word is that their mom signed away her rights before the kids were even two months old and hasn’t been seen or heard from since.

Good riddance, I guess. I’ve heard nothing but bad shit about her.

When Em and Joey finish with their buns they are covered in sticky icing and cinnamon goo. We tag team clean up on the two of them and then load the cars and head to the park.