Chapter 35 Cutter #2
Toni and my grandma brought out trays of appetizers for everyone to snack on before dinner. Weston and my grandpa set up tables in the backyard under the strings of white lights Toni had put up, and I helped carry things out.
“If you’d all join us outside,” Toni said shortly after everyone arrived. She led everyone outside and stood off to the side. I could tell she was still hurting from whatever memory had resurfaced earlier. I stood next to her, with my arm around her shoulders.
“Oh, this is magical,” Eleni said. Everyone agreed.
“Thank you,” I said quietly to her. “For making this special.”
She nodded. “I wanted your mom to be a part of it too.”
It hadn’t occurred to me that that was why Toni had wanted to have everyone over to our house for dinner, but now it all made sense. Here, in the home my mom had loved so much, she’d be able to see everyone come together for prom.
After dinner, and after everyone had praised Toni on the delicious meal she’d made for everyone, I took my friends upstairs to get ready, while Eleni and Flinn’s date, Wendy, got dressed in Toni’s room.
The girls had already had their hair done, and we were told they only needed to touch up their makeup.
I thought Eleni looked perfect the way she was, but what did I know?
Malik, Flinn, and I came down first, dressed in our tuxes. One look at Toni, and I knew she was about to cry. She leaned into Weston and waved her hand in front of her eyes. I went to her.
“Do I look okay?”
She nodded and looked at me with watery eyes. “You look very handsome.” Toni fiddled with my bow tie and then ran her hands down the lapels of my jacket.
The girls made their grand entrance, and I found myself breathless. Eleni looked gorgeous in her fitted gown. It had a low-cut V that accentuated her breasts. My mouth watered. We were getting so close to going all the way; we just needed privacy.
Toni reminded me about the flowers in the kitchen. I went in, with Malik and Flinn following.
“Damn, boy, no wonder you wanted the limo all to yourself,” Malik said as he shook his head.
“I know.” I sighed as the thought of Eleni grinding on my hand with her shirt off flashed in my mind. “I’m not sure how much longer I can hold out.”
“Wendy and I aren’t even dating, and we’re doing it,” Flinn added.
“Lucky. We get to touch each other and shit, but nothing more. Her parents are always home if I’m there, and same here. I’m so mad I didn’t get my license when I turned sixteen. If I had, I’d be able to drive her places now.”
“Whatever you do, use a condom.” Malik shook his head.
I reached into my pocket, pulled one out, and shrugged. “Just in case.”
“Of what?”
I jumped at the sound of Toni’s voice and slipped my hand back into my pocket. My heart raced, faster than ever. How much had she heard?
She looked at me and then my friends. “Boys, can you excuse us for a moment?” Toni motioned for me to follow her outside.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
Toni walked toward the back of the yard, which I was grateful for because I didn’t want Eleni’s parents to hear us.
“Was that a condom?”
I nodded, knowing there was no point in hiding it.
“Jesus,” she muttered as she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Do you know how to use it?”
The question caught me off guard and took a minute for me to answer. I slowly shook my head.
“Jesus,” she said again. “Do you have another one?”
I nodded, reached into my pocket, and set it in her outstretched hand.
“You know your mom had you when she was a teen, and she wouldn’t want this for you. I can’t tell you not to have sex, although I wish you’d wait. I’d rather have you prepared.” She ripped open the packaging and held it out for me to see.
“Do you see this edge?” She continued after I’d nodded and explained how this was the right way to put it on.
She gave me a demonstration using her hand and arm, all while muttering “Jesus” every five seconds.
She showed me how far one could stretch, which, honestly, I had no idea.
Toni took it off and stuffed it into her back pocket, along with the wrapper.
“There is never an excuse not to wear one,” she said.
“Do you use them?” I don’t know why I asked such a personal question.
“Yes, I do,” she said pointedly. “Sex changes things between people, Cutter. It’s emotional and healthy, but it can be damaging.
You respect everything Eleni says about how she’s feeling, and when she says ‘No,’ ‘Stop,’ ‘We can’t,’ or whatever else, you freaking stop.
Do you hear me? You don’t coerce her. You don’t tell her it’s going to make her feel good. Nothing. You get up and walk away.”
I nodded.
“I’d really like for you not to have sex, but I can’t stop you. However, tomorrow, we’re having the talk and we’re going to discuss everything because . . .” She looked at the house and shook her head.
“I know.”
“If you don’t want to talk to me, you can talk to Weston. Knowledge is power here, Cutter. This isn’t something you do on a whim or because your hormones are driving you to it.”
“I love her.”
Toni nodded and pulled me into a hug. “You’re going to be the death of me,” she said to me. “Please be careful.”
“I will.”
We went back into the house. Weston stood in the kitchen, watching for us.
“Everything good?”
I nodded. “Yep.” I didn’t bother going upstairs to take another condom out of the box. Tonight wouldn’t be the night, no matter how eager I was.
Once the corsages and boutonnieres were on, we stood for what felt like an eternity taking photos.
When the limo finally arrived, we cheered.
Toni had set it up so that it would drive us around town while we sipped on sparkling cider, and then drop us off at the dance.
It wouldn’t be a long ride, but it was a bright spot in my life since my mom passed away.