32 EVIE

E VIE

People often ask each other, “What was the happiest time of your life?” For me, I think this was it.

I had started a project that I was so proud of; it made my skin tingle with excitement.

I had become a member of a family for the first time in my life.

It felt like sleepaway camp with a bunch of brothers I never had, all set amid the sounds of music being created in large and small form.

And I was loved by a man who had chosen me, just as much as I’d chosen him, someone who knew how to hold my love and keep it safe.

We had such a long way to go and so much softness and so much darkness to come, but in those moments, I felt pure joy.

We ambled down roads, as cities and towns began to blur from one night to the next, weeks turning into months, and I remember it all now like a rush of swirling water, catching glimpses of shimmering moments as they pass by in my mind’s eye.

I surprised him in return once, on his birthday.

I showed up in Phoenix, unannounced, sitting in the front row and taking delight at the elated look in his eyes when he spotted me there.

Backstage, to the dismay of a few girls who “knew someone” and stood huddled around the dressing room door, hoping, as always, for a piece of the band, Carter threw his arms around me the moment he left the stage.

I gave him a vintage copy of Kepler’s Somnium that night as a gift.

It became one of his favorite possessions.

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