Chapter 10
Alex trudged up the steps of her eerily quiet home to her bedroom and immediately headed for the bathroom.
She smelled like a mix of bonfire and fireworks from Miles’ party.
A shower and fresh clothes were a must. It was a little after midnight, and she was headed to bed.
She was exhausted, and she just wanted to crawl under the covers and sleep.
She turned on the shower, undressed, and got under the spray once it warmed up enough.
It had been hot all day. Even when the sun went down, the humidity still made it uncomfortable.
Sweat and the smoke smell washed off her, and the rhythmic beating of the water calmed her.
By the time she was out and had slipped on a sports bra and a pair of yoga pants, she felt relaxed.
When she stepped out to her bedroom, hair still damp, she paused.
Something was off. She wasn’t sure what, but she could feel something was different.
Immediately going for her handgun in her nightstand drawer, she only made it a few steps before something loomed from behind her, grabbing her firmly from behind.
Alex yelped, her heart pounding, but her years of self-defense training clicked.
She moved to pull out of his grip where he would be weakest. Unfortunately, he had anticipated that move, kicked her leg out from underneath her, and had her pinned to the floor so quickly her head spun.
She tried to move out from underneath him, but he had her in some kind of wrestler’s hold because she was incapacitated.
“You’ve got some moves,” a man said from above her. It was low, smooth, and…familiar?
She struggled from underneath him, panic settling in. This couldn’t happen to her. Not again.
“Easy,” the man said, his voice calm, steady. “I’m not here to hurt you. I need to talk to you. I’m going to flip you forward, so you’re facing me.”
That voice.
For some reason, Alex didn’t struggle as he rolled her, her body still pinned to the floor. Even in the dim light she could see him, and she knew as soon as she looked at his face: it was Blue Eyes.
She gasped and stared at him. He was different now.
Gone were the wild beard and hair. Instead, his hair was clipped short.
His beard had a few days’ growth on it and was almost as long as the hair on his head.
He was handsome, his face chiseled into pure male perfection.
She felt a stirring within she hadn’t felt in such a long time.
Stop this right now, she scolded herself. You can’t be drooling after this man. He’s got you pinned. This is not good.
“You,” was all she could say.
“Me,” he said, his voice low.
“What are you doing here? Why…I mean, what…”
There were so many questions that she couldn’t figure out what she wanted to ask first. She was also distracted by him being on top of her, firmly pinning her to the ground.
She should be scared. She should be freaking out, going into a panic attack.
But she wasn’t. He could have done his worst at the cabin, and he hadn’t.
He had done exactly what he said he would, and there was now some trust, even if he had broken into her home and wrestled her to the floor.
What was he supposed to do? Wait until you have your gun?
Good point.
He could have announced himself. That would have been better than grabbing me.
Another good point.
Who was she kidding? She would have run for her weapon either way.
“If I get off you, do you promise not to run or scream? I’ll explain everything,” he told her, his voice remaining calm.
“Y—yes,” she said, feeling herself shaking now.
“I won’t harm you, Alex,” he promised.
“I—I know that.”
And she did. She knew he wouldn’t touch her.
“Good.”
He eased off her, and the warmth of his large body left her. It was an unexpected feeling of loss, and she couldn’t process why she felt that way.
“Are you okay?” he asked, a look of concern on his face. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” He suddenly looked panicked.
“No. No,” she reassured him. She couldn’t tell him she was now pinning the fact that he wasn’t over her anymore, so instead she said, “Just…processing.”
Alex got up from the floor and watched as Blue Eyes backed away a few feet to give her space.
She noticed right away that his speech and movements weren’t disjointed as they were at the cabin.
He must have detoxed from those drugs. She was thankful.
He could have easily disappeared into the streets to find relief, but he hadn’t. He had stayed true to his word.
Alex sat on the edge of the bed, glancing back at her nightstand table instinctively.
“It’s not there,” he told her. She flinched, suddenly fearful again. “Sorry, but I didn’t want you shooting me. I’ll let you know where your guns are when I leave.”
Alex nodded but felt uneasy. He had gone through her house. What else had he seen? Her underwear? Tampons? Her vibrator? She rarely used it because her desire for sex was so low, but still…
“I’m sorry for the invasion of privacy,” he said. “I really didn’t want to get shot.”
The slightest smile flickered at the corner of his mouth. Even in the darkened room, where the bathroom doorway was the only light, Alex could see it. And it was wonderful.
She couldn’t help it. She grinned.
“Okay.”
There was a long pause between them as Alex assessed him. He was tall but not hulking. He had gained some weight since he had kidnapped her. The way he stood in front of her screamed military, but he said he wasn’t a veteran. Current service member? Something else?
She sat back on the bed. What could that something else be? There were many possibilities, most of them not good.
“Whatever you’re thinking, just…stop,” he told her. “I’m not the bad guy. I may have fucked up royally, but I’m trying to make it right.”
She nodded.
“Okay…then who are you?”
He stared at the floor before looking back up at her and saying, “My name is Nathan Slade. I’m Logan’s brother.”
Alex felt her throat tighten, and she felt dizzy. No, she could not have a panic attack. Not now. But what he said was so wild it couldn’t be true, right?
She took a few long, deep breaths. When she was calm enough, she stared at him, trying to see the resemblance.
He had the chiseled jawline, the black hair, the strong presence.
The eyes were a different color—Logan’s were gray—but they were just as intense.
The men were within an inch or two in height as well, and even though her man was much thinner, the resemblance was uncanny.
However, being tortured in a psych ward for months must have done a number on him.
Could this man really be Logan’s long-lost brother?
“Y—you’re Nathan?” she asked as if she hadn’t heard him correctly.
“Yeah,” he said softly.
When was the last time anyone had seen him?
It was on the island with the super soldiers where Jack and Kat had almost died.
Nathan had been a Conglomerate soldier, thinking he was serving the good guys, when the Conglomerate had been deceiving him the whole time.
Without his help, the outcome of that mission would have been very different.
“Logan’s brother, Nathan?” she asked again as if she hadn’t just asked him.
“You don’t believe me?” he asked, taking a step further back.
“No!” she put up her hand. What was she doing? She needed to talk to him. “I’m sorry. I’m having a hard time processing this.” She shook her head. “Did you know who I was the whole time?”
“No. It wasn’t until I was looking through your car that I found your other ID. Your face looked so familiar, and then I remembered I had seen you before—at Logan and Keira’s wedding. You were a bridesmaid. You looked…beautiful.”
Alex blinked, her jaw dropping in disbelief. Had he been at Logan and Keira’s wedding? Had she made a big enough impression on him that he remembered her?
“I…” What the heck was she supposed to say? “How were you at their wedding? I know who was there. You weren’t there.”
Great. Good way to accuse him and make him feel uncomfortable and leave.
“If I don’t want to be seen, I won’t be,” he said cryptically.
Oh, that’s right. He was a Conglomerate-trained super soldier. No wonder all the self-defense moves she had trained so hard for hadn’t worked.
Then, it dawned on her.
“You were at their wedding, but you could have stayed with Gray Tower permanently. You disappeared after the buildings blew up on the island. Why?”
“I couldn’t go off with Gray Tower. I would have put everyone on that mission in danger.
I didn’t want to do that to Logan and Keira.
I didn’t want to do that to Jack, Kat, and everyone else at Gray Tower.
With me coming back from the island, the Conglomerate suspected I was the one who betrayed them, and Gray Tower was off the hook.
Remember, there was no blowback after that mission?
That was because of me. The Conglomerate would have hit you guys hard otherwise.
They were pissed because of all the suits they lost that day.
“I spent months on the run from them. They wanted to punish me for what I did. Death was too good for me. Plus, they wanted my suit. It’s too valuable.
“They did eventually find me. Took me to that fucked up place. Gave me those experimental drugs. I’m not sure why.
They used a drug combo on the elite ops group in the suits to keep us alert and focused.
It could have been for that, but I’m not sure.
Whatever it was, they fucked with me for months until I finally got out. ”
Tears pricked Alex’s eyes as she realized what had happened. Nathan, knowing what the Conglomerate would do, had sacrificed himself so that his family and Gray Tower would be safe. He had been caught and tortured. For months. How had he survived?
“I’m so sorry.”
He shook his head and said, “I was the idiot who got sucked into their lies. It’s my mess to clean up.”
“Still…” she trailed off.
Alex wanted to go to him, comfort him, but she knew not to.
“Don’t worry about me,” he told her. “I can handle shit on my own. Well, actually…” He trailed off, studying her intensely, his blue eyes piercing.
She shrank back, not knowing how to react. No one had ever looked at her like that. She wasn’t sure what it meant.
“Actually?” she pressed.
“I need your help,” he told her, sounding determined.
“M—my help?” she asked warily.
What could she possibly do for him? Get him in contact with Logan? No. If he found her, he could get to his brother. Then what would it be?
“Yes,” he confirmed. “And I need it just between us. You can’t tell anyone else. Not Logan. Not Keira. And especially not your boss.”
Alex swallowed a lump in her throat. She couldn’t keep a secret from Miles. She just couldn’t. What was so important that only she and Nathan could know?
“Just tell me,” she finally said.
“I need the patched code to the Conglomerate’s super suits and any notes your friend Kat has on it.”
“No!” Alex exclaimed automatically. “Absolutely not. There is no way I’d ever…” She trailed off as the realization hit her. “You still have your suit! Don’t you?”
Nathan nodded.
“I do.”
“Gray Tower needs that suit. We need to—”
“I need it for a mission that I guarantee is more important than what your company has planned for it,” he said, cutting her off. “It would practically obliterate Project X and…if what I’m being promised is true, the man who oversees it.”
“Project X?”
“The super soldier suit program. Trust me, I wouldn’t ask you this if this wasn’t important.”
“But…why do this alone?” she asked. “Why not get help? You have so many people willing to help, Nathan.”
“The more people involved, the more blowback if it fails,” he said.
“Plus, you have Conglomerate spies at your company. An operation this size wouldn’t go unnoticed.
And also…” He shook his head. “I am doing this for the man who busted me out of that psych ward. I owe him. Plus, not only will this destroy Project X, but he’ll hand me the leader. I’ll finally get my revenge.”
Alex frowned.
“What did he do?”
“He was the one who recruited me. He was the one who put me in that suit. He was the one who lied so that I’d willingly work for the enemy. Yeah, he’s number one on my list.”
That explained how he got out of the psych ward, but who was this guy pulling all the strings?
“Who is helping you? It has to be someone well-connected.”
“I can’t tell you…yet.”
Alex huffed and crossed her arms.
“Can you at least tell me what this mission entails if I were to hypothetically go behind my boss’s back, sticking my neck out to be fired and possibly seeing jail time?”
“I’ll tell you. But you have to promise this doesn’t leave the room. Even if you don’t agree to help, you must give me your word you won’t tell anyone at Gray Tower about what I’m doing—and my identity. It would wreck everything.”
Alex bit her lip. She should tell Miles no matter what, but there was something in her gut telling her to trust Nathan.
She stared into those sapphire blue eyes and saw a man haunted by his past. He needed to do this, and he was capable of it.
She didn’t want to go behind Miles’ back; he had given her everything.
But there was something about Nathan that was telling her this was right.
“I won’t say anything,” she said softly.
He let out a long sigh.
“Thank you.”
“Please don’t let me down,” she said. “Miles is like a father to me. He—”
“I know,” he interrupted. “And if this wasn’t a priority, I wouldn’t ask. Hell, I feel terrible about involving you in the first place. But I need that information, and you can get it for me.” He looked her straight in the eyes. “You’re someone I can trust.”
Her heart fluttered. She shouldn’t be having this reaction to him, but she couldn’t help but be drawn to him.
“I’ll give you a few days to decide,” he told her.
Alex nodded. She was glad he wasn’t forcing her to decide tonight. She needed to think.
“I’ll come back,” he promised. “Hopefully, I won’t scare the shit out of you.”
She remembered the blinding fear when she realized someone was in her house. She also remembered the weight of Blue Eyes on top of her. Now knowing who he was, she thought back to that moment and suddenly wanted it to happen again.
What is with you? Alex scolded herself. This is not you. You don’t have sexual thoughts like that.
She was starting to realize Nathan had opened the floodgates, and she wasn’t sure what to do about it.
“See you around,” he said, walking out of her bedroom door. “Oh, your guns are in your spare bedroom,” he called as she heard him walking down the steps.
Alex let out a long sigh. She was in trouble. She was going to have to choose between Miles and Nathan, and although she knew she should go to Miles, she wanted to help Nathan. If he succeeded, all those suits would be gone. She just hoped Miles would forgive her when he eventually found out.