bright side
MARLEY
So many emotions are colliding inside of me right now. Embarrassment topping them all.
They settle heavy on my shoulders, and I simply sit with them alone on the sand.
How did I get here?
Days ago, I was an overworked editor who boarded a plane with fun things planned and the resolve not to let anything disrupt my vacation. Now I’m sitting here wondering if I’ve jeopardized the biggest opportunity of my career because of a lie.
I can’t get the look on Collette’s face out of my mind.
She trusted me and believed in me enough to hand over an opportunity without hesitation.
This chance would have given Mod more recognition.
Put us on a level far greater than the one we’re currently on.
She could have called any major publication she wanted. Instead, she chose us.
Me.
I can’t help but cringe at the thought. How I could fuck this up is beyond me.
I marinate in every bad decision I’ve made thus far, replaying them one after another. I blame myself. I blame Othello. But this is not his fault. It was all on me. I should have just told the truth. Would the outcome be different had I told her sooner?
“Ugh!”
Damn it.
I drop my head in my hands.
In situations like this, I need my best friend. So I FaceTime Lo. She answers, wearing a bathrobe and a silk scarf wrapped around her hair.
“What’s wrong?” she asks, immediately noticing my gloomy expression.
“Don’t hate me.”
“What?”
“I messed this up.”
She props up her phone and drops into the seat at her vanity, the illuminated mirror making her look far more put together than I currently feel.
“Messed up what? What happened?”
“Collette knows about me and Othello. She knows I lied to her.”
Her mouth drops open. “Ohhhh. Wow, I’m sorry, Marley. How did she find that out?”
“The manager from the front desk came apologizing about the room mess-up, and Collette put two and two together.”
“Damn,” then realization hits, and her eyes become the size of saucers. “Oh no! What does this mean? Does this mean no more exclusive?”
I shake my head, so irritated with myself that I can’t even answer. Lo swears under her breath.
“I don’t know what to do. I’m like, do I go and make things right, or what?”
Lo’s mouth is still open, shock written all over her face as she slowly shakes her head.
“Lo!” I snap. “Tell me what I should do. I’m like, so mad at myself right now.”
“Well, I mean, when you told her, what did she say?”
The words are carved in my memory. The disappointment in her voice, the look in her eye.
So, you let me believe something that wasn’t true?
When I repeat the words to Lo, she winces. “Ouch.”
“Yeah.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah…”
“I mean, honestly, it sounds like someone who’s hurt, not angry.”
“Umm, is one better than the other?” I ask incredulously. “I don’t want to hurt people, Lo. Especially not Collette Randolph!”
“I get it. But did she say anything else after that?”
“No, and she didn’t need to. Lo, you didn’t see the look in her eyes. The way she looked at me. Like I was a disgrace. Such a letdown. Like that is my idol, looking at me like I’m a fraud. It was torture!”
Lo starts wiping her face with a cleansing cloth.
“Okay, Mar, I get it. But let’s stop spiraling for five seconds and look on the bright side.”
“There’s a bright side?”
Lo pauses and stares off into space for a beat. “No. But let’s pretend there is.”
I groan. “This is so not the time.”
“All I’m saying is that Collette never actually said the story was off the table. She’s upset, and rightfully so, but those aren’t the same thing.”
“It’s off the table.”
“But did she say that?”
No.
“Collette saw something in you. Yes, I know you lied about being in a relationship, but I’m sure if you approach Collette and just tell her the truth, she will at least respect you for owning your mistake.”
Lo starts slathering on her facial cream, rubbing the moisturizer into her flawless brown skin.
“I don’t know.”
“What do you have to lose?”
I look at her deadpan. “My entire cover story. That’s what we have to lose. This isn’t something we can replace overnight.”
Lo shrugs and nods.
“True. But, whatever the outcome, we will be fine.”
“I can’t believe I let this happen,” I groan into my hands.
“Will you see her tonight?”
She switched off the light at her vanity, slipped out of her robe, and climbed into bed in a soft Victoria's Secret pajama set. The six-hour time difference suddenly becomes apparent. While her day is ending, mine is somehow still going strong.
Or wrong.
“I’ll see her at the rehearsal dinner tonight,” I tell her. “But I’m not even sure I should go.”
“No, you have to go. Go to dinner and tell her the truth. Apologize and let her know you didn’t mean it.”
I’m taking Lo’s words into consideration when a text comes through, the brief vibration jolting me with anticipation. I assume it’s Collette, but it’s Othello.
Seeing his name softens me a bit.
We’d finally exchanged phone numbers, and he’d somehow made a habit of sending me cute little messages at random ever since.
OTHELLO: Where are you? You good?
MARLEY: I’m good. Out on the beach talking to Lo.
“I should go,” I tell my friend. “Othello’s looking for me. Please, don’t tell anyone about this yet. I want to talk to Collette first.”
“Noted. And Marley, don’t worry until she actually tells you, “You’re fired.”
Despite the look of sadness on my face, Lo giggles and tells me goodnight before hanging up. I stare off into the sea, the waves doing little to nothing to put me at ease.