20. Building The Future
20
BUILDING THE FUTURE
B randon was up with the sun a week after the heavy conversation with Summer. He’d already driven to Burlington to pick up the supplies to build a back deck when he heard a vehicle coming down the gravel road. Perfect timing. He reached the front and found his dad, Austin, and Evan climbing from Austin’s truck.
“Thanks for coming,” he called.
“The house is looking great,” Austin answered.
“You could have made it look this way,” Brandon said.
Austin shook his head. “Nah, I had no desire to do this much work. That’s why we hired out for our place.”
Evan slapped Austin on the back and said, “That was more because you were impatient.” He turned to Brandon. “You’ve done a great job.”
His dad had been quiet, but Brandon could see the approval in his eyes as they rounded the house. “Looks like you’ve already got the footings and posts in. Good.”
“The concrete is set, so we’re ready to place the beams and joists,” Brandon answered. “After we unload the trailer.”
“When did you get a trailer?” Evan asked.
“Yesterday, when I couldn’t borrow Austin’s truck. ”
Austin frowned. “Sorry about that, but this is better anyway. You may need it again sometime.”
“Or,” Evan rubbed his hand over his short hair and said, “I could borrow it?”
“Sure. What do you need it for?” Brandon asked as he tossed more lumber from the back of the truck.
“We’re thinking of adding on to the house,” he said.
“Why?” Austin asked.
Evan sighed. “This is not how I wanted to do this.”
Everyone stopped to stare at him. He placed his hands on his hips and stared up at the sky. Brandon glanced up to see what was so interesting, but he only saw blue dotted with a few fluffy clouds.
“Darcy and I.” Evan stopped and let a huge grin take over his face. “Well, let’s just say our plan to wait a couple of years before having a baby is no longer an option.”
Brandon’s dad reached out and grabbed Evan by the shoulders. “Say that again.”
Evan smiled, nodded, and said, “Darcy’s pregnant and due the first of March.”
Brandon jumped from the truck to join the hugging and clapping of shoulders. “Congratulations, man. I’m so happy for both of you.”
“You know, I’d love to have more grandkids all close to the same age, and so would your mom,” Brandon’s dad smirked.
Brandon held up his hands. “I don’t want to rush Summer into anything. But I plan to ask by Christmas if things keep going this well. Maybe at Christmas. That sounds romantic, right?”
Austin laughed. “You think Summer is the romantic type?”
“Not like Darcy or Carly, but women like those special moments,” Brandon replied. “I want it to be a good memory for her.”
“You’ve gotta know that she’s not going to do this like most women do,” Austin continued. “Since last weekend, she’s been giving me hints about how she hopes you’ll ask soon.”
“What?”
“She spends more time with me than any of the women in the family. I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but that girl is ready to move forward.” Austin grabbed the box of screws from the corner of the trailer. “Seriously, you should talk about it.”
“We sort of did, but it was more me saying she had as much time as needed.” Brandon rubbed his beard. It needed a good trim.
“Talk to her again, Son,” his dad said. Then he clapped his hands. “Okay, enough talk. Let’s build your love a deck she’ll be proud of.”
Summer was nervous. She knew Brandon planned to work all day on a surprise for her, but that wasn’t what ran on a loop inside her head. It had been a week since she last heard or saw Griff. In a way, she felt like he’d died for the first time. She’d tried hiding her sadness from everyone around her, but it bothered her so much that she texted James and asked to meet for coffee. She needed to know if Griff had successfully moved on. That would help her let him go.
She pushed her way into the chain coffee shop in Burlington, where he agreed to meet. Her skin tingled with anticipation. What if he couldn’t tell her what happened with Griff? She took a deep breath and flexed her hands. That would be fine. Most people didn’t get to spend extra time with their deceased loved ones. She would deal with it.
The coffee shop wasn’t too busy since it was the early afternoon, but she didn’t see her friend. What if he didn’t come? She glanced at her phone. There were no messages canceling. She moved to order an iced coffee and a cake pop and then gave in and opened her phone to text.
Summer: I’m here and will grab a seat toward the back.
“Summer,” the barista called her name, and she grabbed her drink.
Just as Summer was about to choose a table, a familiar voice called out her name. She turned to see James standing near a hallway at the back of the shop. A wave of relief washed over her as he said, “They have meeting rooms back here.”
“Hey, James.” She joined him in a small nook behind the wall with several tables. The music wasn’t as loud, and there were no other patrons.
He stared at her for a long moment. “You’re different than the last time I saw you.”
Summer smiled. “Good, different?”
A slow smile moved over his lips. “Yeah. You look happy, and you’re alone.”
She sucked in a breath of air. “So, Griff is gone?”
James nodded. “I’m guessing he accomplished his goal. What happened since we last spoke?”
“I finally told Brandon everything.” Summer blushed. “Things are good.”
“I’m happy for you, Summer.”
She nodded. “I know this won’t fix everything I struggle with, but I’m not alone anymore. Well, I guess I finally accepted that I was never alone. Does that make sense?”
“Yes.”
“So, how have you been?” Now that she knew Griff was really gone, she found she didn’t want to talk about him or his loss yet again.
They sat and chatted for half an hour before James gathered his trash and said, “I should go, but can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“Have you heard from Maria? I’ve texted her several times this week, but she hasn’t responded.”
“I haven’t talked to her since the last time she was at group. Do you think something is wrong?” Panic rose in Summer’s chest. “She left rather abruptly.”
“I’m worried about her, but Fiona says she can’t give me Maria’s address. She did say she’d check in on her.” James closed his eyes and took several breaths through his nose. “We don’t talk about the statistics, but did you know there was an average of seventeen suicides a day by veterans in 2021? Maria isn’t going to come back from what she endured. Not easily, and I don’t know if she wants to yet.”
The last conversation Summer had with Maria resurfaced. The other woman had asked her a question. Summer thought honesty was the best course of action, but remembering the look of utter despair on Maria’s face, she now feared she’d dashed the last of her hopes.
Summer reached out and grabbed James by the arm. “We have to check on her. Now. I might have messed up. Bad.”
She appreciated that he didn’t question her, even as her whole body trembled. Instead, he pulled out his phone and dialed Fiona. The woman didn’t hesitate or diminish their fears, but she promised to call for a well-check by the authorities as soon as they hung up.
“What if it’s too late,” Summer whispered.
“This isn’t your fault,” James said.
She knew he was trying to help, and she knew he believed what he said, but it felt like a confirmation of her deepest fears. It hadn’t entered her mind to censor what she said when Maria asked if it got better. To make matters worse, now that she’d confided in Brandon and he had held her closer, things did feel a little better.
She’d always hate what happened. Part of her would fear it would happen again for the rest of her life, but knowing she was loved despite what was done to her had loosened the bands wrapped around her chest. That’s what Maria needed, but that isn’t what she’d delivered with her honesty at the time.
“Summer,” James called her name. “Look at me.” When she did, he continued, “Can you drive home? Go. Be with your family, and I’ll tell you what Fiona learns. Okay?”
“Okay.” She nodded. “Promise?”
“Yes. Now go. Stay with the people you love in case the news isn’t good.”
Summer gasped and blinked back the tears that rushed to her eyes. “Please, no.”
James walked her to her car, hugged her, and spoke soothing words until she could drive away. The new fear clawed at her all the way back to Sugar Creek. Instead of going home, she drove to Brandon’s.
Sweat dripped down Brandon’s back, but he’d never been happier. Knocking out a project with men he respected and loved felt good. They’d talked and laughed well past lunchtime and had the decking down. After a short break, they’d start on the rim joists and railings.
“It would have taken me days to do this on my own,” Brandon said as he passed sub sandwiches to the others. “Thanks again for coming today.”
No one spoke as they filled their mouths with food, but they nodded. The sound of tires on the gravel interrupted the chewing noises. Brandon hopped off the deck where he was sitting and walked around the house. Summer parked, but she didn’t get out, so he hurried to her car.
She glanced at him, squeezed the steering wheel, and opened the door. Her eyes were red-rimmed, her face pale, and her hair looked like she’d run her fingers through it even though her bangs were pulled back in a clip.
“Summer, what’s wrong?” he asked.
“Hold me,” she gasped as she fell into his arms. “I don’t want to be alone right now.”
Brandon held her tight as she sagged against him. It was as if all the strength had left her body. He didn’t know what was wrong but wanted to do whatever she needed. The heat surrounding them reminded him of how soggy and smelly his shirt must be.
“Summer, let’s go inside,” he whispered.
“I don’t know if I can move.”
“Okay.” He shifted and scooped her into his arms, wedding style. “I’ve got you.”
She rested her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck. He thought she might be crying, but he didn’t push her to talk as he carried her up his front steps and into the house. Brandon tried to set her on the couch so he could at least change his shirt, but she clung to him.
“Love, let me change, and then I’ll hold you as long as you need,” he said.
“I don’t care if you’re sweaty. Please don’t leave me.”
Brandon had never seen her like this. It broke his heart into a million pieces. “What happened? Did someone hurt you?”
“No. I made a mistake, and it—” she sobbed into his shirt as he sank onto the couch with her. “What if it’s too late?”
“Sweetheart, I don’t know what’s going on. How can I help you?” he asked.
The back slider opened before she could say anything. Austin, Evan, and his dad walked in.
“Do you have…Oh.” His dad stuttered mid-sentence. “Is everything okay?”
“I don’t know,” Brandon answered. He felt awkward holding Summer in his lap before an audience, and he couldn’t handle two conversations in his current state.. Summer needed his full attention. “Let’s call it quits for today.”
“That’s a good idea,” his dad said. “Let us know if you need anything. Come to dinner—both of you. We’ll invite your parents, Summer.”
“Thank you,” she squeaked.
After that, all three men disappeared, and the house was silent except for the sound of the refrigerator motor and the occasional sound of ice falling in the ice maker.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Brandon asked once Summer’s tears had subsided.
“Yes, and no. I said something that might have hurt someone so bad that...”
“It’s okay. You can tell me.”
Summer pulled back enough to meet his gaze. “Maria, someone from the group, might be struggling more than I realized. I met with James today, and he said she hasn’t been answering his texts, and now Fiona, our counselor, is trying to track Maria down to make sure she hasn’t taken her life.”
“That’s awful, but how does that involve you?” Brandon’s heart pounded uncomfortably.
“She asked if I was over my rape since it happened so long ago, and I told her I wasn’t. She experienced much worse than I did while in Afghanistan. I didn’t recognize it then, but I don’t think she wanted to live after what I said. It’s been over a week since we talked.” Summer wiped at more tears. “I don’t know what I’ll do if…”
“Shh. I know this hurts more than I’ll ever understand. But Maria makes her own choices. Even if what you said is hard, she can ask for help. You can not take this on yourself.” Brandon wondered if he was saying the right thing for Summer. His words were valid, but she seemed so fragile.
“I know, but it doesn’t feel good.”
He pulled her back into his side and rested his face in her hair. Brandon remembered something she’d said in their talk a few days earlier. “Is this hard because you know how she feels?”
She nodded against him, and fear gripped him.
“Do you still feel that way?” he asked.
“No. Not now, but in the beginning, I’d slip into this dark place and wish everything would stop. Being active in the Army helped keep me busy and give me a purpose.” She reached for his hand and threaded their fingers together. “Now that I have you, there’s so much to live for that I don’t think it’ll be a problem again.”
Brandon did his best to breathe evenly and not freak out. “If it is, you’ll talk to me, right?”
“I promise.” Summer’s phone rang, and she wiggled to pull it out of her pocket. “Hello?”
He couldn’t hear what was being said, only the murmur of a voice, but he felt the moment Summer’s body fully relaxed against his.
“Thank you, Fiona. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help her.” She said goodbye and hung up. “She’s alive!”
Summer pulled him down for a kiss. He could feel her desperate relief and energy humming all through his body. It was as if she didn’t know how else to deal with the emotions.
Whatever the reason, he didn’t mind her kissing him. He enjoyed the feel of her lips on his, her body pressed close, and how she had come to him when she needed someone. This is what it meant to love and be loved. You were there, even when you couldn’t understand the depth of the situation.
Eventually, he eased away from the woman he never wanted to let go. “They found her?”
She nodded but didn’t smile. “She’s not in good shape, but they got to her in time.”
“Did she?” he couldn’t say the words.
“No, but it looks like she hasn’t eaten anything in almost a week. She was curled up on her bed, all the curtains closed, and they had to break down her door to get in. They’re taking her to the VA Hospital for recovery, and then she’ll be offered more extensive counseling help.” Summer held his face between her hands while she closed her eyes. “She’s a lot like Griff. He didn’t have any family waiting for him to come home. Maria has one sister, but she lives in California. It must be so hard to be that alone.”
“She has your veteran group, and she has you. You understand her better than most people could. If you want to visit, I’ll drive with you.”
“You’ll keep me company?”
“Always. Just say the word.” A little dip appeared on her brow, and Brandon wanted to kiss it away. “What are you thinking?”
“I haven’t been to Griff’s grave. He was from Tennessee. Would you go with me to visit it? I need to say a proper goodbye.”
Brandon held her tighter. Part of him wondered how close Summer had been to the man he’d never met, but mostly, he was grateful that she’d had someone to trust. That was the part of himself he leaned into. The other man was gone. Perhaps it would do Brandon some good to visit his grave and express his appreciation for the man’s love and sacrifice.
“I’ll get my dad to fill in at CBB. We can go whenever you want.”