Chapter 36
36
BAILEY
I swiped the loose pieces of hair that had fallen into my face away and untied the apron around my waist. I’d been cooking for a few hours now, trying to make dinner for Hank and me. I’d invited him over for dinner and to watch a movie. He didn’t know it yet, but we would be watching 13 Going on 30 again and I would be making him stand up and do the Thriller dance with Mattie, Jenna, and me when the scene played. Part of me wanted to ask him to dress up as Mattie and Jenna from 13 Going on 30 for Halloween and an evil part of me knew he would say yes.
Hank Martínez loved me fiercely and would do anything I asked him to, just like I would do for him.
After the night his father ambushed us at his place, we’d seen each other nearly every day. He would come here to pick me up after he got done working and then we would go and spend the night at his place. Ophelia had told me numerous times he was more than welcome to come stay at our place, but I didn’t want to impose on her more than I already was. Hank was coming over tonight though because she was out of town again for work and would be away for the next few days.
She and I had shared a coffee this morning before she left and she asked me how things were going.
“So, did you tell him you love him yet?” she half joked as she sipped her coffee.
“Actually, yeah, I did,” I confessed without pause. I wasn’t afraid to tell people how much I loved Hank.
“Look at you, my sweet Bailey girl all grown up and falling in love with a hot, sexy soldier.” She wiggled her eyebrows and shimmied her shoulders when she said the word ‘sexy’.
“You know Ophie, you can fall in love too if you let yourself.” I peered at my friend over the brim of my mug as I took a big gulp of coffee. She choked on her drink and started cackling.
“Bailey darling, don’t make me laugh. Love is nothing but a myth for women like me.” I studied my friend and tried to conceal the sadness I felt for her. I know she had her reasons for believing that love wasn’t for her, but I wasn’t letting go of the hope that one day she would find her match just like I had.
My head spun to find the clock that hung on the wall and noted that it was six fifteen and Hank should be here any minute. Everything for dinner was ready. Amanda had come over again to show me how to make a few more dishes Hank had told me about and I think I nailed them this time. Over the last few weeks, I had picked up several more side gigs planning private dinner parties and functions for some of the clients I’d worked with during my time at the event hall. Many of them complimented my hosting skills and ability to hire the perfect staff. Several asked me if I owned my own company. ‘One day,’ I would smile and tell them. Just as soon as someone hired me for a full-time gig and I could save up for it.
When I heard the knock on the door, my heart fluttered a few beats faster and I nearly skipped to open it. As I opened the door, I was met with a fresh bouquet of flowers and a very handsome looking Hank. Having him come to me after work made my entire day. It made me feel like we were playing house, which I hoped that some day soon wouldn’t just be playing. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me in for a kiss as we stood in the door frame. Something about it felt off, like he didn’t share his full self in it like he normally did. He handed me the flowers and followed me inside before I closed the door behind us and locked it.
“Mmm, something smells delicioso, hermosa? 1 ,” he hummed as his eyes took in all the food laid out on the counter. His brown eyes grew wide when he saw what I had cooked for him and my heart swelled.
“I’m glad. I cooked some of your favorites tonight.” I bounced up and down with pride watching him smell and eye the food.
He strode towards me again and wrapped his arms around me in an embrace. Looping my arms around his neck, he picked me up and squeezed me tight. My feet lifted off the ground and he spun me around the kitchen before setting me back down. Burying his nose into my neck, I felt him inhale deeply before kissing the spot behind my ear. As he pulled away from me, I caught a look of pain in his eyes. Between his somber expression and the way his kiss felt off when he first arrived, a nervous stirring started in my stomach.
“Hank,” I started as he held me where we stood, his eyes looking down into mine. “What’s going on?”
He took a step back from me, startled, “What do you mean?”
“I can tell something’s wrong, I see it in your eyes. What is it? Is it something with your dad? Did he come back?” He was holding my hands but had taken a few steps away from me. I didn’t like how it felt; like he was standing right next to me somehow also hundreds of miles away.
“No, it’s not my dad.” His jaw clenched for a moment before he started again. “Come, let’s sit and talk for a second.”
I felt my heart sink lower in my chest and tried to not let my mind go to the worst possible place. He can’t be breaking up with me? Can he? I thought we were good. What did I do? He held my hand in his as he led me into the living room. I followed him to the couch where he sat down and I took a seat next to him. He wore a grim expression on his face and was staring down at his hands. My heart was racing as I waited for him to speak.
“Hank…”
“I have to tell you something,” he murmured, still not looking me in the eye. I had never seen him like this before, not even when he told me about his father for the first time.
“Hank,” I whispered his name again and my voice hitched in my throat as I tried to hold back my emotions, “are you breaking up with me?” Tears welled up in my eyes as I said it because even just verbalizing it was too painful.
His eyes shot up and met mine, “What? Oh, hermosa, clara que no? 2 . I love you. I love you so much it hurts. I think about you from the moment I wake up to the moment I finally fall asleep and even then, I dream about you. You’ve made me the happiest I have ever been, happier than I ever thought I was deserving of. Please don’t cry, I’m not leaving you. I just don’t want to bring you any pain.” He used his thumb to swipe the tear that had fallen down my cheek.
“Why would you bring me pain? If you aren’t leaving, I don’t know how you would cause me any pain. I’ve never been happier than I’ve been since meeting you. What do you mean you don’t want to bring me any pain?”
He took a deep breath and swiped another tear away. He leaned in and kissed me on the cheek and as he did, I closed my eyes and committed the feeling of his soft lips on my skin to memory. I wanted to commit everything I did with him to memory.
“I know who attacked you.”
I heard him say it but my brain couldn’t fully process it. I sat next to him on the couch, completely stunned, as the five words sank all the way down into my bone marrow.
I know who attacked you.
“Wh–what?” I sputtered, blinking a couple of times as my brain caught up with what he had just said.
“I know who attacked you. Kolbi just gave me a name today. It took some time for him to find anything from that night, and a few more weeks for us to clean up the footage and track him down, but then today?—”
“Wait, from Kolbi ?” My eyebrows furrowed in the center of my face trying to comprehend everything he was telling me. “What do you mean, from Kolbi ?”
“Earlier this summer I was thinking about how you told me you felt like you couldn’t really move on from what happened to you because the man who hurt you was still out there. I wanted to try and help you, so you could move on from this and feel safe again, so I asked Kolbi to help me. It took him a couple of months to find anything but eventually he did. Once we had something solid, it took a couple of weeks for us to clean up the footage and see if the guy's face was in any database, and it was. We have a name, Bailey. You have a name. You could take this guy down if you wanted.” His eyes were filled with hope but my heart was filled with nothing but betrayal. I had trusted him with what had happened to me and he turned around and shared it with his friend.
“You told Kolbi about me…” I croaked, unable to hide my hurt. I’d trusted him with something so personal and even if he had the best intentions, he had shared my truth with someone else.
“Yes, but only because I wanted to help you.” He gently shook his head at me, crestfallen.
“But I didn’t ask for your help, did I?” I swallowed hard, trying to keep the tears at bay. “And I certainly didn’t ask you to share my deepest secret with one of your buddies, did I?” I snapped at him before standing from the couch on uneasy legs. I was struggling to decide if I was angry with him for telling his friend my secret or touched that he wanted to try and help me. And my head hadn’t even started to process the idea that the man who hurt me had been found.
“Bailey, please, don’t be angry.” He stood from the couch and reached for me as I started to walk towards my bedroom.
“Don’t be angry?” I scoffed, spinning around to look at him again. “How am I not supposed to be angry when you shared something so personal about me with one of your friends? And you said you asked him about this months ago? That means that every time I’ve gone with you to campaign night, he’s known about me all along. About what happened to me. How am I supposed to feel about that? Do the other guys know too?” I brought my hand to my heart and threw it out to the side as I spoke.
“No, they don’t know. Only Kolbi and I know, I made him promise that he wouldn’t say anything to them. Please, I know I broke your trust but you have to believe it was because I wanted to help. I love you.” He tried to pull me into his chest but I pushed him away. My head was spinning and I could feel the tears threatening to come any second now and I wasn’t going to cry in front of him.
“I don’t know what to think, Hank. I’m sure you did this from a good place, but I don’t know what to think right now.” I wrapped my lips around my teeth and bit the inside of my cheek. “I think you should go.”
“You want me to go?” His head hung to one side and his voice broke. He tried to pull me into him again, but I took a few steps away and wrapped my arms around myself, shielding myself from the shock of what he’d just told me.
“I need some time to think. You come here, drop this on me, and expect me to what? Jump in your lap and thank you?” I tried to take a few steadying breaths but my voice trembled anyway. “I just need some time to think. Please Hank, give me time.” I stood in front of him digging my fingers into my sides and holding my breath, mere seconds away from completely breaking down. He set his shoulders back and pushed out a breath before closing the distance between us. When he pressed his lips to my forehead, I nearly collapsed in a mound of sobs and tears at his feet.
“For you, hermosa? 3 , I would give you the world. Eres mia para siempre? 4 ,” he whispered before pulling away. I stood in my bedroom and listened as he slipped on his shoes, pulled open the door, and closed it behind him as he left.
Once I knew he was gone, I dropped to my knees in the empty condo and sobbed.
1 ? delicious, beautiful
2 ? Oh, beautiful, of course not, no.
3 ? beautiful
4 ? You’re my forever (You’re mine forever)