Chapter 14
The first month of school has flown by. I do well in avoiding Lisa each day. Don’t get me wrong; it’s not without effort. She has made it clear she is still holding hostility toward me. It only grows each time I have an article selected, especially if hers is bumped. However, she has enough to distract her as tensions between her and Kate have become obvious to everyone in the newsroom. Last week, I overheard some of the kids working on the print machine talking about how they got into it in the parking lot before school. Not that I should care, but Kate is somewhat of a friend. I guess. We work near each other and have “friendly” conversations. She reminds me a lot of Sarah Mae. They would get along well.
Ben still insists on walking me to and from each of my classes. We don’t have lunch together though. I’ve managed to sit in the cafeteria unbothered since the first day, and apparently, he doesn’t do the lunch crowd. I don’t know where he skips off to every day.
He is probably hiding from Summer. She’s remained persistent, watching us as we walk to and from classes. I thought Ben was the stalker. She can’t take the hint that he wants nothing to do with her. At first, I felt sorry for her, but not now. Not that it’s any of my business or that I care to put too much thought into it. However, he is my friend. I can’t deny that after this point. We do spend every day together. He brings me coffee in the mornings. That’s what friends do. Right?
I’m in the lunchroom now, looking up at one of the paintings, mulling over these questions. Attempting and failing at avoiding the headache I have from staying up late finishing the Calc homework. I don’t care if it isn’t due until Monday. I refuse to let math ruin my weekend. I was surprised to find most of my classes no more challenging than at Wilcocks, Calc being the exception. In fact, things are going so well, I have more time than I thought to ponder other things. Ben is an enigma that my brain wants to spend a lot of that time on.
He is handsome, and despite the flirtatious nature that at this point he probably couldn’t turn off if he tried, respectful. Never trying to attempt anything more than friendship. We don’t talk about dating at all. Books, yes. The paper, yes. The vein in Lisa’s forehead that is permanently enlarged, yes. How Summer is lurking as we walk, yes. He always shrugs it off and never gives any inkling he regrets his decision in ending that situationship.
As I continue thinking about the Summer issue, it’s as though she is Beetle Juice, but it’s thinking of her name three times that summons her to appear in front of me. “Dorothy, right?” Summer’s annoyingly high-pitched voice hits my ears as she sits down in front of me. She leans her elbows on the table. “I’m Summer.”
Why lunch? Why is it my lunch that keeps getting interrupted? The food here is amazing. Today’s shepherd’s pie is like Gordon Ramsay himself prepared it. “I know who you are, and it’s Amelia.” I don’t let my annoyance go unnoticed. Ben is the only one who calls me Dorothy. I would like to know how she knows that’s his nickname for me. Probably overheard him on one of her stakeout missions.
“Oh good. Ben HAS mentioned me.” She perks up and smiles. It is sickly sweet, like an escaped mental patient. “He has mentioned you too.”
What is she playing at? Last time I checked, Ben couldn’t stand her. Suddenly the reporter in me comes alive. “When would he have time to do that, between avoiding you and trying to get you to take a hint?” Did I say reporter? I meant the witch in me. Normally I’m more collected, but my head hurts, her voice is grating, and I just want my shepard’s pie and some peace.
“Oh, you’re a funny girl. I didn’t realize Ben liked funny girls.” She manages to keep her composure even though her smile has become manic. “Listen sweetie, a little word of advice. Ben may be all caught up in this sweet little innocent girl from Kansas act you have going, but eventually he’ll get bored.” God, what is it with girls at this school trying to give me advice? I can’t pretend like her words don’t sting, though. Has he been talking about me? Is calling me Dorothy a big joke to him?
“Thanks for the advice, but I think we both know the only thing Ben is tired of is your fake voice, fake nails, and come to think of it, he is just tired of you.” I would like to disclose that on a normal occasion, I don’t condone bullying or leaning into the urge to get even. Turning the other cheek and all that. However, right now I’m pissed. I’m mad my lunch got interrupted. I’m annoyed it’s under the guise of giving advice, when in reality, Summer is peeing on Ben like he is a tree. Finally, I’m enraged by the possibility that my entire friendship with Ben is out of boredom and a chance for him to play with the small-town girl. With that said, civility be damned.
Summer breaks her act. “Listen to me, you little tramp.” Oooh, burn. “Ben is mine. He knows it. I know it. Hell, the whole school knows it. He WILL get bored with you and come running back to me like always.” Her voice is shrill, her eyes wide, and lipstick slightly fading as she spits while she talks. I thought I only had to dodge spit in Calc.
“Can’t wait.” I roll my eyes, take a breath, and bite into my shepherd’s pie. I refuse to let another lunch be ruined. Summer actually stomps her foot and squeals as she runs off. Wow.
Thursdays are supposed to be my day. I was coming off the high of having another article chosen for the paper. Some of my better work too. A comparison of quoting short form video sounds to the way folklore would travel. It went in-depth into the importance of cultural connections. Now I have to go to Anatomy, angry at Ben, and gosh dang it if it isn’t lab today. We have to work together.
I leave lunch a few minutes early to avoid Ben waiting for me in the courtyard. Maybe if I get there quick enough, I can request a different partner today. I have been meaning to expand my social circle. Yeah right. To my dismay, Ben is early too. He’s already in the courtyard when I walk through, and any attempt to get by him unnoticed is futile. “Hey Dorothy, ready to spend the next two hours looking in a microscope?” Oblivious, he is.
“Stop calling me that. People are going to start thinking it’s my name.” I snap and keep walking toward the science building.
“Woah, did I miss something?” He follows after me.
“You did actually. You missed your ex-girlfriend informing me that I’m just an innocent girl from Kansas who has become your plaything.” I don’t try to hide the fact that I’m hurt or annoyed.
“Wait. What? Amelia. Stop for a second.” he begs. I don’t though. I keep walking and go through the doors to the science building. “Amelia, come on.” Ben moves to catch my hand, stopping me, but I jerk from his grasp. I’m too angry to give in.
“Leave me alone, Benedict.” He’s silent at my demand but doesn’t stop matching my pace until we are in the Anatomy lab, concern on his face. I put my things down and start pulling on my lab coat, prepping the station.
“What do you mean my ex-girlfriend talking to you? Who?” He can’t be confused.
“So many exes you lost count?” He’s ridiculous, and I can’t believe I’ve wasted this much time thinking of him. I almost considered… You know what, it doesn’t matter what I almost considered.
“Please explain. I’m lost here.” Dang it, those eyes. Fine.
“Summer, Benedict. You know. Your crazy ex that still follows you around. At least, I thought she was your ex.” I really need to calm down. “She came up to me in the cafeteria, told me how you are just playing with me because you’re bored.”
“Amel- “he tried to interrupt.
“She called me Dorothy.” When I say it, the full extent of the hurt hits me. It’s silly. It shouldn’t matter. If he is just messing with me, we are only friends. It’s never gone farther than a few flirtatious comments. Why am I this upset? I look at him properly. He has that look on his face. The one he got when I told him about my first encounter with Lisa. He had it again the first day at golf too, it’s a look that says he is about to burn the world down. It doesn’t match a boy who is just messing with a girl for fun.
“Only I get to call you Dorothy.” He takes my face in his hands, and I suck in a breath at the contact. He leans down and looks me directly in the eyes. “I don’t care what Summer said. You. Are. Not. A. Game. Understand?” I would nod but I seem to have lost the ability to speak. He’s sincere and demanding. “Words. Amelia.” Still nothing, what are words again? He drops his voice. “Say you understand.” The lower register of his voice shoots straight through me. The upset and hurt dissipate, and a new feeling blooms.
“I understand.” He doesn’t let go of my face. We are stuck with his hands on my face as he searches my eyes, as if looking to see if he can believe me. I might actually have forgotten how to breathe.
“Good.” He leans closer. “I’m glad you understand that, and one more thing.” I have time for a million more things because the entire world has paused “No one else will be calling you Dorothy again. I’ll make sure of it.” Then he releases me. Just like that. Air fills my lungs, and I’m light-headed. I lean against the lab stool. Right, the Anatomy lab. We are still in school, getting ready for class.
“You don’t have to do anything. I handled Summer.” Is the only thing I can get out.
He turns to me, leans one hand on the lab table, and uses the other hand to stroke a piece of fallen hair behind my ear. Physical touch is new. It’s a line up until two minutes ago he hasn’t crossed. I wish I could say I hated it, but I think I might crave it.
“I know you can handle anything Dorothy, but she messed with something that’s mine.” He says it nonchalantly as his fingers linger near my neck without touching it. The unfamiliar feeling swells in my belly.
“What’s that?” I ask so close to his face if I could just lean in a little.
“You are mine.” I might faint.
“Your friend, right? You mean I’m your friend.” Dumb. Dumb Amelia. You know that isn’t what he means.
“Sure, we’re friends.” Ben pulls back and turns back to the lab table. The rest of the block is incredibly awkward. I miss his hands on my face. The way he tucked my hair behind my ear. I’m completely lost here. I have no idea what to do. I don’t think I want to be friends with Ben. The way he called me his felt right. I may want that. I may want that very much.