History #3
“That was a memory of Queen Miranda, and her dragon was Cheery,” Vasin said gently, confirming what I already guessed—she was the Raven Queen.
“If I had known it would be so upsetting to you, I would have tried to stop the memory. Although I believe something has tied you to her. It seems she transferred many of her memories to you for some reason.”
“It’s fine. I’m glad I saw it. I couldn’t watch her men die there in the castle,” I said, feeling tears prick the corners of my eyes.
“From what you have shared, your dreams have made them real to you. I know you already lived through her death and the pain she felt at losing them. I am happy to tell you that her daughter became one of the greatest warrior queens the mercenaries ever had. The mercenary way of life would have vanished had she not been leading the charge. With the death of her mother and fathers, she vowed to avenge them and is remembered fondly, even now,” Vasin comforted, nuzzling against my back.
“What was her daughter’s name?” Trying to connect the dots.
“Queen Emery, the last reigning queen before you. Her son reigned after her but was killed before he could have any children. Since there was no black dragon to pick another ruler, the mercenaries have been without a true leader since.”
“Cassarah, where the hell are you?” Cole called out.
“Must be dinner time,” I said, rubbing my palms into my eyes to hide the tears that had threatened to fall.
“There you are,” Cole said, walking up to us.
I looked up and gave him what felt like a convincing smile.
Apparently, it wasn’t convincing enough since he kneeled in front of me, grabbing my face. “What the fuck are you crying about alone in the woods with your dragon?”
“Vasin and I were working on harmonizing, and I ended up getting pulled into a memory of Miranda… when they all died,” I explained.
“Wait, the person you keep dreaming about?” Cole asked, dropping his hands after using his thumbs to wipe away my tears.
“Yeah. Miranda, the Raven Queen. This memory also showed me what started the Great War. King Edmund and Queen Sarah wanted to use her daughter, Emery, to sweeten the deal on an alliance with another kingdom. Miranda flat out refused their request and declared they were separate from the rule of the kingdom.” I took a deep breath, trying to ground myself.
“I stopped watching the memory because I didn’t want to see their deaths again.
Vasin told me her daughter led the revolt and saved everyone. ”
“So we finally have the whole story about what happened. Sal will be pissed he didn’t get to find it first. Fuck, wait ’til he figures out you’ve had first-hand viewing of it all.” Cole smirked.
I groaned, knowing I would now be required to write down everything I knew about Miranda. “Maybe I’ll get lost on the hunt tomorrow, and we’ll never have to tell him.”
“That’s the spirit. Come on, let’s go eat before Helena sends out reinforcements,” Cole said, holding out a hand and pulling me to my feet.
“Right, like Abbott is going to be much of a threat.” I giggled, knowing what a softie he was outside of training.
Cole glanced over his shoulder at me. “You know you’re the only person he acts that way around, right?”
I just smiled in answer, shrugging my shoulders. Cole rolled his eyes at me and kept walking.
“Cass, do you think Miranda is trying to tell you something? I have a strange feeling that memory needed to be shared with you, and there is some connection to what is happening now.”
“We’ll have to try it again and find out,” I said, giving Vasin a hug and a good scratch before I walked back to the house with Cole.
“Vasin seems to think there might be a connection between us,” I mused aloud.
“You’re going to be Queen soon, and we are on the verge of a war with the kingdom. Sounds like you could learn a thing or two from her,” Cole said, glancing sidelong at me.
“We still don’t know if I’m going to be Queen. There is still the job I have to survive before that.” I sighed.
Cole stopped and turned on his heel, cupping my neck with one of his hands, causing me to gasp at his reaction. “You need to cut that shit out right now. As long as you don’t fuck it up or die, they have no reason not to accept you.”
“Great pep talk.” I scowled at Cole, shoving out of his hold.
In the past few months, he and Abbott had decided I needed to learn to be okay with contact, so they had been much more free with small touches here and there than I would have liked.
Brushing hair out of my face, sliding a thumb along my jaw, holding my hand…
Cole, in particular, seemed to have a particular attachment to my hair, always tugging on it or playing with strands of it when I had it down.
Although, I had to admit that having their attention in that way made my heart flutter and body heat.
“You don’t have to be a dick about it. I was just trying to help,” Cole grumbled as we walked into the kitchen. “Tomorrow will be a great chance to see where you still suck and need more work. That’s the point of these hunts.”
“When I was a trainee, I loved going on hunts,” Helena chimed in as she set food on the table. “My first hunt was where I met your grandfather. He’d already finished his training, so we didn’t get much chance to interact outside the hunt.”
“I never knew that,” Cole said, sitting at the kitchen table.
I grabbed the dishes and set them on the table before I sat between Cole and Abbott, knowing they would throw a fit if I sat elsewhere.
“Yes, your grandmother was quite the wild woman back in those days,” Ballard shared, kissing Helena on the cheek before he sat with us. “She had aspirations of becoming the best mercenary in all the clans.”
“I would have too if I didn’t have to take care of you.” Helena winked at Ballard as she filled our bowls.
“My parents had an arranged marriage, but I’d always hoped to fall in love with the person I was going to marry. Now with how life has changed, I’m not sure how all that’ll work for me,” I said, smiling at the thought of Ballard and Helena when they were young.
“Of course, you should fall in love. What fun is life if you live it all alone with no one to share it with?” Helena asked, making it sound like I should’ve already known such things.
“Besides, once we get you crowned, the guardians will be selected, and you’ll have your choice of men to pick from. ”
“Wait, what?” I asked, surprised by this information.
Helena gave me a disapproving look. “Child, have you learned nothing from Sal? Every king or queen selects men and women from all the clans to be their personal guardians. Many of the queens of old ended up marrying one or more of those guards. So pick wisely, my girl. They will be around you at all times.”
Blushing at her words, I took a moment to wrap my head around the idea before speaking.
“I mean, I read about that tradition, but I didn’t think it would still be practiced now. I’m not sure I really need them. I have Vasin to keep me safe and share my life with.” I shrugged, poking at the food on my plate, not looking at anyone. I could feel both the boys stiffen beside me.
“No, no, no.” Helena waved her spoon at me, catching my eye.
“That is hardly the same. I’m talking about when you have the worst day imaginable, who would be the person or persons to hold you and tell you everything will be okay?
When you have something to celebrate, who is going to dance with you in the kitchen of your home?
When you find who you want to share the rest of your life with, you will come to understand what I mean.
Life is never really lived ’til you have met your soulmate or mates and you live it together. ”
I had always dreamed of falling in love, but could you really love more than one person?
Then my thoughts drifted to Miranda and her men.
I’d felt the love they had for each other and knew she didn’t love one more than another.
They were devoted to each other equally. Was that something I was capable of?
“Enough, Helena, the poor girl gets it. She’s never had the expectation of finding her soulmates. Do you really think her mother would have left that to chance?” Ballard said, patting Helena’s hand to calm her.
“Hmph, I suppose not,” was all Helena said on the matter.
I giggled at their exchange and glanced at Cole to see him watching me with an expression I couldn’t quite figure out. I looked away first and dug into my meal as Abbott shifted so his leg rested against mine as we finished eating.