Chapter 10 Emi #2
If Roman is like me, he hates surprises—it makes me feel off-balance to not have control over any given situation—but if that’s the case then he’s handling this like a pro.
He’s smiling indulgently at Addison as she wraps her arms around his neck and peppers his face with “half-birthday kisses.” Even if he hates surprises, I have a hard time imagining anything shaking that man.
As soon as Addie releases him, he starts to make his way around the room, smiling and greeting his friends with her by his side.
“They complement each other well,” I say to Austin, nodding at them. “Like their differences balance the other out. He’s kind of stoic and she’s more…um…”
“Obnoxious?” He laughs when I’m unable to come up with a different adjective on the spot.
“It’s okay, she’d be the first one to admit it.
Yeah, that’s our Addie. She’s a little crazy but she’s also fiercely loyal to her friends, and you’re right about them as a couple.
They’re a perfect match. I couldn’t ask for a better woman to love my friend. ”
“You’re close with her, too, aren’t you.” It’s not really a question. I can’t put my finger on it, but there’s a definite connection between them. “I mean, I know you’re close with Jane, too, but you treat her more like a kid sister. With Addison, it seems different somehow.”
Austin drags a hand over the stubble on his jaw, slams the rest of his draft beer, then takes my hand and leads me away from the crowd.
Suddenly I’m overanalyzing things at warp speed and imagining every possible scenario that’s about to occur, from him telling me that I’m totally crazy to telling me that he and Addison have a love child no one knows about because she’s being raised by a distant aunt across the country and holy shit maybe I am crazy.
I have no idea where all that came from. Normally my thought process is fairly logical, but at the first hint of something being off, I went all Girly 2000 and let my emotions run away with my brain. Emotions, I might add, that I’m not allowed to have. Shit, shit, and more shit.
“I was going to wait to tell you this later, but I just need to rip off the Band-Aid and get it over with.”
“Maybe I should get another glass of wine if it’s that bad,” I say, forcing out a light laugh that feels more like a brick in my stomach.
Because whether I’m supposed to have feelings for him or not, I can’t deny that I don’t want our time together to be over yet.
I’m not ready to give this up. I’m not ready to give Austin up.
He steps in close and brings my hands up against his chest. “That’s the thing,” he starts, “what I have to tell you isn’t bad at all, which is why I want you to know. But I’m not sure if you’ll see it the same way.”
“There’s only one way to find out.” I stare up into his beautiful green eyes, willing him to be honest with me about whatever it is. The one thing I’ve been able to count on with Austin is his unabashed ability to be completely open with me.
“Until recently, Roman’s sexual proclivities almost always involved ménage. The two-guys-one-girl kind.” He exhales before saying the rest, like he’s purging it from his body. “And oftentimes I was the other guy.”
“Ooh, kink—” I cut myself off as I realize what he’s trying to tell me. “Oh, you were with him and Addison.”
“It was only in the beginning, until Roman finally got smart and stopped sharing her.”
“Okay,” I say, trying to wrap my brain around the fact that the man I’m currently in a sexual relationship with was in a prior one with that gorgeous blond bombshell across the room. “So, it’s the same as still being friends with an ex-girlfriend. I get it.”
“No, it’s not the same at all. That’s my point. Even though I was with them physically, I was never more than a tool for Roman to give her more pleasure than he could by himself. Addie and I never had any kind of investment in each other emotionally. Not as anything more than friends, I promise.”
“It doesn’t matter if you did, Austin. It wouldn’t even matter if you were still involved with her.
I don’t have any rights to you.” I lower my eyes to where he’s still holding my hands to his body.
My chest feels tight, and the words are like ash on my tongue.
“This isn’t anything serious, remember?”
“Doesn’t mean I have to like it,” he says, his voice a low rumble as he uses a finger under my chin to lift my gaze to his.
“I’m not trying to push you for what you can’t give me, and I know I don’t have any claim over you, despite what I told Coop.
But you feel free to claim me all you want.
I’m yours for as long as you want me, Emi. ”
I do want him. I want him more than I should and more than I’m able.
I don’t know what to say, so I don’t say anything at all.
Rising on my toes, I fuse my mouth to his, pouring my desire for him and what we have into the kiss.
Oblivious to the turmoil swirling inside me, he anchors a hand on my neck and one at my back and kisses me like we’re the only two people in the world.
“Does this mean we’re cool?”
Austin smiles against my lips, then turns his head to acknowledge Addison, who’s clutching her hands in front of her chest with a hopeful look on her face. “You could’ve given me more time to seal the deal, Addie.”
“I’m sorry, I totes hate to cockblock you and all, it’s just that Roman’s whining about not seeing you and I was hoping you could keep him occupied because the second half of his surprise is almost here, and I wanted a chance to talk to Emi because I really don’t want her to hate me, so I need you to move along, and at least two of those things are true. ”
Still unsure whether she’s intentionally being funny, I bite the inside of my cheek to stop the giggle trying to escape.
Austin doesn’t have the same concern and laughs with abandon, making me swoon where I stand.
I love it when his dimples pop into his cheeks and the crinkly lines frame his dancing green eyes.
“That sounds about right,” he says before pressing a gentle kiss to my lips as he brushes my cheek with his thumb. “We good, princess?”
I nod and give him a reassuring smile. “Go on. I’d hate to see Roman cry at his half-birthday celebration.”
He winks at me, then saunters off in the direction of his friends, and I’m left with a happy Addison, who claps her hands like a little kid about to get ice cream.
“Okay, so you don’t hate me, right? Because there’s nothing between me and Austin.
I’m utterly, madly, head-over-ass in love with Roman. The cowboy’s all yours.”
“No, Addie, I don’t hate you. I’d like us to be friends,” I say genuinely.
I still might not be sure how to take her all the time, but I am sure that while her personality is a lot more over-the-top than I’m used to, her heart is big, and her intentions are good.
And I think I like her even more for the fact that she’s completely the opposite of anyone I know.
Nothing will ever be dull with her around, and that’s exactly what my life has been missing.
“Perfect! I told Janey we were going to be just like the Three Musketeers.”
“Wow, Austin gets himself a ball and chain and suddenly I’m replaced?”
I turn around to a smiling familiar face. “Raquel,” I say, surprised to see the girl I nicknamed Bambi outside amateur night at Cardinal Sin.
She squints a little, trying to place me. “Yeah, how’d you—” Her eyes grow big. “Raven? Oh my gosh, you’re Austin’s girlfriend? That’s so cool!”
“No, I’m not—”
“Holy shitballs, nobody move,” Addie orders, then she yells loud enough to be heard over the music. “Janey, stop making goo-goo eyes at Thor and get your cute butt over here.”
Jane leaves the bar and joins us, cosmo in hand. “What’s up?”
“Emi is Raven.”
Jane looks perplexed for a few seconds, then gasps. “The dancer you told me about at Cardinal Sin? Oh wow, I wish I could’ve seen you that night, Emi. Addie told me you were amazing.”
I think my cheeks are literally on fire.
It’s not every day that your new friends realize they watched you rip most of your clothes off and dance like a sex-crazed maniac around a pole for a room of horny men and a mountain of singles.
Not that I took the money, but that’s beside the point at the moment.
“She was, and Austin was drooling all over himself, and I was totally shipping them, and I even named them Ravstin, but now we can call you Emstin because you’re so together. Let the record show I totally called this, which obvs means I’m psychic. Recognize, bitches!”
“So your real name is Emi. That’s beautiful.
” Raquel performs a sneak attack hug, proving to be just as sweet as I remember her.
“I’m so happy to see you again, I can’t even tell you.
If it hadn’t been for you, I don’t know if I would’ve gone through with dancing that night.
Are you dancing at the next one? Then Jane and I can see you in action. ”
“Um, I’m not sure.” I didn’t even realize that I missed this month’s amateur night until just now.
Usually I’m itching to let Raven out of her cage by the time the next one rolls around, but I haven’t even thought about it.
The play sessions with Austin have kept her depraved needs well-fed.
“Can we keep this between us, though? No one really knows—”
“That you have a kickass stripper alter ego?” Addison finishes for me. Smiling at me, she says, “Don’t worry, girl, we have some experience keeping that particular secret.”
Jane and Raquel nod in agreement and promise not to take an ad out in the Tribune about my less-than-respectable hobby.
Relief washes over me, but there’s one more thing I feel I should clear up.
“Also, for the record, Austin and I— We’re not…
well, we shouldn’t have a combo name, you know what I mean? It’s not like that.”
Addison snorts. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, hon.” She links her arm through mine, then tips her head to where the guys are all hanging out by the bar. “Come on, ladies. We don’t want to miss the look on Roman’s face in a few minutes.”
“What happens in a few minutes?” I ask, walking with the girls.
She tosses her blond waves behind her shoulder and smirks. “I become the best girlfriend in the history of ever.”
As soon as I reach Austin, he pulls me into his side and kisses my temple. “Everything okay?”
It does crazy things to my insides the way he checks in with me. It’s not always with words—he’s gotten very adept at reading my body language and reacting accordingly—but whether we’re eating lunch, acting out fantasies, or watching a movie, he’s always very in tune with me.
I beam up at him and slip my arms around his waist. “Everything’s great.
” I’m rewarded with that dazzling smile I love so much, and then he introduces me to Liam, who’s another P4H guy and also the best friend Raquel told me about who hadn’t been thrilled with her stint as an amateur stripper.
From the way I see him looking at her when he thinks no one’s watching, my suspicions were right. That boy has it bad.
A minute later, Roman’s second surprise walks in: all twenty-two players of the Chicago Blackhawks, led by Addison’s cousin, Sam Larsen, who brought a hockey stick that eventually got signed by every member of the team.
It’s mass chaos that puts any case of fangirling I’ve ever seen to shame.
We drink and dance and shoot more tequila than is healthy, but by the end of the night, both of Addison’s predictions have come true: she is dubbed the best girlfriend in the history of ever, and I admit—if only to myself—that Austin and I are indeed temporarily… together.