Chapter 27
COLTON
I scoffed. As if I didn’t know that already.
“Is that why you kept her around?” I asked. “To play nurse? She would have been paid handsomely for it too—after your death, of course.”
William flinched. “I’ve started the annulment process. I won’t let her filthy hands get anything—”
“You mean anything more than the millions she’s already stolen from me, right?
His chin dropped to his chest. “I’m sorry. I was hurting—”
“So, you’ve said. But I haven’t heard you once acknowledge what happened to me.
Do you even recognise the damage you wrought?
” I asked, my voice hoarse and desperate as I stabbed a finger against my sternum.
“I am a fucking broken human being. One beyond repair or redemption. I am a monster, born out of survival. A mistrusting man who can never live a normal life. And it is all your fault.”
“I understand,” William said, eyes full of tears and acceptance.
I slashed a hand through the air, his response infuriating. “No, you don’t. How could you possibly know? You corrupted my innocence, hijacked my grief and refused me the one thing I needed the most—my father.”
I deflated, each word lined with anguish as I unloaded on him. “I just needed you, Dad… But you weren’t there. Why weren’t you there for me?”
His features were twisted as if he were in the most exquisite pain. “I wasn’t in my right mind, son. I was unbearably selfish and was only thinking—”
“Of yourself? Yeah, I know. You proved that at every opportunity, without any regard to your only child.”
“Please believe me. I never meant to hurt you. I love you.”
“I don’t love you,” I snapped back. “The father I loved died right alongside my mother.”
He was quietly sobbing then. “Colton, please, I’m sick. I don’t want to spend my last remaining time without you. Let me make amends while I still can.”
I stared at him then, drowning beneath a sea of suppressed feelings and sorrow. I found myself at a crossroads. I had to make a monumental decision—one that would change the trajectory of my entire future.
After Mum passed away, William’s health declined and never seemed to recover. A couple of years in, and he was diagnosed with kidney disease, leading to regular dialysis and the search for a kidney.
What William didn’t know was that I was a match.
I had undergone extensive testing and cross-matching to be certain, my need for control so far-reaching that I couldn’t let that unknown remain untouched. However, having that confirmation had caused a war within me. Until now.
William had lost everything. I had singlehandedly stripped away his business, his home, his reputation, his new love, and his main support. Yet, why did it not feel like enough?
I was so young when he had torn my entire world apart that I still couldn’t manage to piece it back together. I had abandoned all hope, knowing I’d forever live in a space that was tarnished and fucking damaged. I was damaged.
He did that to me. He was responsible.
Did he truly understand what I went through and the irreparable impact he had on my psyche? It was truly time I found out.
Licking my dry lips, I reverted to the same question I asked earlier.
“I want you to be honest, William. Where would we be right now if I hadn’t revealed Nikita’s secrets?
Would you have ever given her up? Would you have sacrificed everything to have me as your son again?
Would I have ever been your first choice? ”
In the split second that followed, I’d received my answer loud and clear, without him having to say a thing.
His shoulders slumped inwards as guilt and shame twisted his features. We both knew the answer.
I never would have been his first choice.
Never.
My eyes shut tight as a low keening tore from my chest, unable to be held back from the pure agony ripping up my insides.
It tunnelled deep, tearing through the innermost parts of me and the protective barrier I had held onto for so long. I could feel myself splintering at the seams. My instincts urged me to run, escape and find a safe place. I don’t feel safe here, with him.
After a long minute, I opened my eyes to William, who recoiled at my raw intensity. I had nothing left to hide and decided to give in—let him see it all, just this once.
“This is farewell, William,” I said with finality.
“Colt, just take some time. You don’t have to decide anything—”
I held up a palm, cutting him off, raising to stand on two stable feet. There was no way he could miss the resolve in every tense line of my body.
“I deserve to heal. I deserve to be someone’s first choice,” I said, with full sincerity. “And I have finally chosen a path. I choose my own. I choose me.”
I turned to the door, taking advantage of his silence when my name was softly spoken from behind.
“Colton. If this is farewell, then let me leave you with this.” I paused in the doorway, allowing him one last word.
“I have no right to your forgiveness or any ounce of empathy. I failed you, my son, and for that, I will be eternally sorry. But if you’ll be so kind to hear the wish of a dying man?”
I tipped my chin to the side, indicating that I would listen.
“Please don’t let my mistakes and regrets guide you any longer.
You are not broken, you are not a monster, and you are not beyond redemption.
You are stronger than anyone I’ve ever known, and because of that, I know you will be brave enough to trust again.
Then you won’t just live a normal life, but a phenomenal one. ”
His voice cracked, remorse bleeding into each and every syllable. “Chase happiness, live for yourself and don’t look back. I send you off with my blessing and undying love. Be happy, my boy.”
As soon as he finished, I stepped outside of his room and let the door close behind me. I concentrated on taking one step at a time, refusing to buckle to my knees right there in the corridor.
I choose myself.