Twenty-three #2
“My head hurts, my arm feels like it’s on fire but other than that, I’m okay,” I tell him honestly.
The doctor nods. “That’s understandable. You had a nasty hit to the head; you had ten stitches placed on your hairline.” The doctor picks up my chart, noting something on it before adding, “The bullet grazed your arm, and you lost a fair bit of blood, so you will probably feel weak for a few days.”
I take in everything he says. The bullet only grazed my arm. That’s good—still hurts like hell.
“What about some pain relief. What are you giving her? She’s in pain.” Zac’s question comes out harsh.
“It’s okay,” I tell him, trying to keep him calm.
“No, it’s not, sunshine. You’re hurting. It’s not fucking okay.”
The doctor looks down at the chart in his hands.
“She’s on the best pain relief we can safely give her,” he says to Zac.
Looking down at me, he adds, “You’re doing great.
We’re going to keep you in overnight for observation, but you should be able to go home tomorrow.
I’ve ordered an ultrasound tech to come and check on the foetus, just to be cautious. All your bloods came back good.”
I noticed Zac stiffen during the doctor’s spiel. He is looking down at me as he watches my face. I run back through what the doctor said; it takes a minute but then it clicks.
“Wait, what?” I question the doctor.
“All your bloods came back good.” He places the chart back over the foot of the bed.
“No, go back a bit. Foetus? What foetus?” I ask him.
“You didn’t know you were pregnant?” the doctor asks.
I shake my head, unable to speak, and look over at Zac, who has not said a word. He is still looking down at me, watching for my reaction. It’s almost like he’s holding his breath, too afraid to move.
The doctor continues, “My guess is it’s early; the scan will tell us more.”
Pregnant. Pregnant. I’m pregnant. How did this happen? Of course I know how this happened. I smile at that thought. Then something lingers in the back of my mind.
“Why don’t I remember what happened?” I ask the doctor.
“You were injected with propofol. You were asleep for most of your ordeal, I believe.”
I nod my head. Well, that explains why I can’t remember anything.
“Will that hurt the baby?” I ask the doctor. As I do, Zac looks up to the doctor while squeezing my hand.
The doctor shakes his head. “No, the baby should be fine. Let’s get the scan done and find out how far along you are,” he says with a reassuring smile.
I’m about to thank him, but before I can, Zac breaks his silence. “Should be? Should be fine is not good enough.”
He pulls his phone out of his pocket, dialling someone and looking back down at me briefly, before the call connects.
“Dean, find the best OBGYN in Sydney. Get Alyssa an appointment with them tomorrow.” He listens for a bit. I can’t hear what Dean says but Zac answers, “Yes, I don’t care how much,” before hanging up the phone.
The doctor looks down at me and smiles. “I’ll find out where the ultrasound tech is.”
I nod and thank him, unsure what to say right now. With that, he walks out the door. When the door closes, I look back to Zac, who is again staring down at me, like he’s waiting for something.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him. What if he thinks I got pregnant on purpose? That I’m trying to trap him or something?
“You have nothing to be sorry for, sunshine,” he says while absently placing his hand over my abdomen. I don’t even think he’s consciously doing it.
“I don’t know how I got pregnant,” I say, to which Zac arches his eyebrow at me. “Well, obviously I know that part, but I didn’t once miss a pill, I swear. I didn’t lie to you. But I will understand if you don’t want this. I can do it. It’s okay—”
Zac leans down and kisses me, kisses the hell out of me, cutting off my rambling thoughts.
When he leans back, he smiles so wide. “Sunshine, you are crazy if you think I would ever let you do this by yourself. Or that I wouldn’t want a child who is made up of us, of our love.
” Tilting his head, he looks at me, waiting.
“What are you looking for?” I ask him after a few moments.
“I’m wondering where the panic attack has gone. You once had a panic attack on me at the thought of having a child, but you seem so calm right now. It’s a little off-putting.”
That’s why he went stiff and quiet when the doctor mentioned a foetus. He was worried about my reaction.
I smile at him. “I realised that it doesn’t matter what happens to me. If I end up having a shorter life like my mother, this baby will still be loved, will still have a family. I won’t be leaving this baby alone in a world that can be so cruel.”
“I’m not going to let anything happen to you, sunshine. You’re never leaving my side again.”
He looks serious, like his word is law and nothing will ever happen to me. I’m not as convinced it’s that easy.
“I want this life you’ve given me, Zac. I want a family with you. I want to have this baby.” My eyes tear up at the thought of everything I ever wanted coming true. “I want to always have a tomorrow with you,” I tell him.
“Sunshine, I want nothing more than to raise a family with you. For all of my tomorrows to be with you. I love you,” he says while wiping the tears from my eyes.
The door opens and the ultrasound tech rolls in with a trolley machine. The girl introduces herself before blushing profusely, a reaction that often comes when Zac introduces himself to any woman. Rolling my eyes, I look over at the screen as she places the wand on my abdomen.
This is surreal. I can’t believe this is happening right now. After a few swipes of the wand over my stomach, the unmistakable sound of a heartbeat rings out through the room.
“What’s that?” Zac asks, like he’s ready to go into battle, making the woman jump.
“Relax, you’re going to give her a damn heart attack. That sound is the baby’s heartbeat. Our baby’s heartbeat.” I have tears running down my face again.
Zac reaches up, wiping the tears. “What’s wrong?” His voice is soft, concerned.
“Nothing, I’m just really thrilled right now.”
I stare at the screen, where there is a still picture of my womb.
You can’t see anything other than a blip on the screen.
The ultrasound tech finishes with her measurements, and wiping the gel off of my stomach, she says, “You’re about five to six weeks pregnant.
Everything looks good. The heartbeat’s good, strong. Congratulations.”
“Thank you,” we both reply as she unplugs her machine and leaves the room.
I look at Zac. “I can’t believe this is real; we’re having a baby.”
“We are, and you should probably get some rest while you can. I’ve told everyone they can visit you tomorrow, so expect to be inundated with visitors you can’t get rid of when you wake up.”
I smile, thinking of how hard he must have worked to get my friends to wait until tomorrow to come barging in here. “I don’t know how you got the girls to agree to wait until tomorrow.”
“I didn’t. They’re camped outside in the waiting room now, refusing to bloody leave,” he grunts.
That sounds more like my friends. “You should probably let them in for a bit. They won’t leave otherwise.”
“I’m selfish, I know, but I want you to myself. I don’t want to share you and this baby with anyone yet.” Zac shrugs.
I nod, slightly agreeing that I don’t want to share either. “I know, but we always have tomorrow together, right?” I ask him.
“Always,” he says.
“Promise?”
“Promise. We will always have a tomorrow together, sunshine.”