Chapter 29 #2
“Are you?” she asked, folding her arms across her chest. “Iris deserves fairy-tale-level love. You gave her campaign optics and emotional whiplash. Newsflash: you don’t get to be Prince Charming after the heartbreak montage. That’s not how this works.”
“I know I screwed up. I know it seems like all I cared about was my campaign. But that’s not true. Trust me, I knew what I had long before Iris was willing to give me a chance.”
Selene’s unmoved gaze said she was going to need more.
“I was willing to accept her asking about my prostate and sticking dead bugs to the wall. And collecting gynecological equipment.”
That got a little snort out of the witch.
“That may have been my doing. I had a whole list. We never did get to the best parts.”
“My point is, I was happy to accept those … eccentricities. Because they were a part of her and I knew how special she was.”
“And yet you let her walk away last night.”
“Selene, if I followed her, the press would have too. There would have been no privacy to talk it out or try to patch things up. I gave her privacy, figuring we could fume about it together back at the apartment.”
“So it was Henry.”
“Of course it was Henry. I wouldn’t do that to her. We had a special day.”
She was melting.
But he could still feel the ward radiating in front of him.
“Please, Selene. I don’t know what to do without her. I don’t know who I am without her.”
“If you come in here and you hurt her again, I will turn you into a toad. A really ugly, warty one. Who can only eat dung beetles.”
“Understood.”
Her head tipped to the side, brows drawing together. Any softness she’d been showing him dissipated. When she spoke, her words were cool once more. “You know what breaks this ward?” she asked. “Sincere intentions. Weird how it’s still holding strong.”
Finn let his anxiety and fear fall away, leaving only the raw, desperate need to see Iris again.
“Fine,” she said when they both sensed the ward falling. “But don’t make me hope you’re different then prove me wrong. I hate hoping. It’s bad for my blood pressure. And my brand.”
She waved toward a door to the side of the building, and he could feel her critical gaze on him until he dis-appeared on the other side of it.
Finn’s gaze slid around the room until he found a lump underneath a pile of colorful blankets on the bed.
He took a deep breath, suddenly anxious about what he was going to say. He’d been so focused on finding her that he hadn’t figured out what he might say when he did.
He had no grand romantic gestures—just a bag of semi-hot pretzels and his heart to offer.
He had to hope it would be enough.
He made his way over to the bed, sitting down on the edge.
“I don’t want to work on a hex.” Iris’s voice was muffled from the pillow.
“Why not? Haven’t I earned it?”
The lump on the bed jolted as Iris dropped onto her back, the blankets falling down to reveal her red-streaked face and puffy eyes.
“What would you do? Give me a tail? Turn me into a werewolf groomer? A vampire tooth-sharpener?”
“I don’t want to speak to you,” Iris said, not falling for his weak attempt at a joke.
“If you don’t want to talk, will you listen?”
Her gaze was guarded, but she didn’t object.
“I know you might not be willing to accept this, but I promise you, I did not set us up to be papped like that. I didn’t, and wouldn’t, invite that kind of invasion. We have enough scrutiny on us. The last thing I want is the media prying into our rare private moments.”
Iris’s gaze slipped. “It was Henry, wasn’t it?”
“In a way. It was more of a misunderstanding. One I made clear can never happen again.”
Iris sucked in a deep breath, her soft, vulnerable gaze lifting to his.
“Why didn’t you come for me?”
“I knew you were upset. I didn’t want them chasing you down. I tried to distract them so you didn’t have to deal with that. I thought you would go home. Then we could talk.
“I don’t think I realized how hurt you were until I came home and found you hadn’t returned. I thought I’d lost you,” he admitted, his voice cracking. “I thought you’d gone back down to the ocean floor and that I would never see you again.”
“You would have forgotten me in a day. I’d have been replaced in a week.”
“Iris,” he said softly. “You think you’re forgettable?
You turned my whole world upside down. You made me question everything I thought I wanted.
I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since you threw your drink in my face.
And I don’t want to stop thinking about you. Not in a week, not in a lifetime.”
He saw her softening, but the tremble in her lower lip said she wasn’t quite there yet.
“Yesterday was supposed to be ours. No plans. No press. Just you and me. I should have made sure our peace was protected. I just … underestimated how necessary it was to make my boundaries known.”
She looked at him, a glimmer of hope hidden in those gorgeous eyes of hers. “So what’s different now? What stops this from happening again the next time the campaign needs something shiny to parade in front of potential voters?”
“What’s different now is that nothing in this campaign—nothing in this whole damn city—has ever felt real until you.
“Everything I say in interviews and on stages is polished and practiced. Every handshake is a strategy based on polling and research. But with you? With you, I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t know the right things to do or say. And it’s new and scary. But it’s real. It’s mine.
“I can’t lose you, Iris.” His voice was hardly more than a whisper. “Not to them. They don’t matter, not anymore. All that matters is you. And if there’s even a chance that you want to give me another chance, I promise I will do everything I can to protect you.”
She exhaled shakily, arms wrapping around her bent knees.
“I want to believe you.” Her voice was quieter, raw around the edges.
“I do. But you and I both know that the spotlight, the cameras, the questions—they’re a part of your life.
And I can’t fake it like you can. I can’t put on a smile when I’m upset or angry.
I can’t be perfectly polished and know all the right things to say and how to act.
And we both know I would be a liability to you. ”
“You are not a liability. You’re the reason I remembered I’m a person at all.
” His voice shook, earnest and bare. “Before you, I didn’t even know I was running on autopilot.
Smiling, shaking hands, pretending to be whoever the people wanted me to be.
You made me want something for myself. Made me crave something real. You have to see that.”
The hope battled the fear in her eyes.
“It could all fall apart,” she said. “The optics. The campaign. We both know I’m not meant for public life.”
“Good,” he said without hesitation. “I don’t want someone meant for something as fake as public life. I want you. Wild, wonderful you.”
“You’re not afraid?”
“Terrified,” he admitted, a small, crooked smile breaking through. “But I’d rather be taking risks with you than safe on my own. Because nothing is scarier than a future without you.”
Her eyes were shimmering then. He knew she wanted it just as much as he did.
“I can’t promise I won’t screw up,” he said, reaching for her hand. “Because I probably will. I’m still figuring this out—how to be the man you deserve. But I promise I won’t ever stop trying.”
“I don’t need perfect. I hate perfect. But …”
“But?” he prompted.
“But I love you. I love you enough to be willing to give up everything I thought I couldn’t live without.”
His heart, so crushed just hours before, swelled in his chest, threatening to break free.
“You don’t know what it does to me to hear you say that. I’ve been chasing approval, applause, votes—and none of it has ever meant as much as this, as you. I love you too. More than I even knew I was capable of. But I don’t want you to give up anything to be with me.”
“Your life is on land.”
“And part of your heart will always be in the ocean. I would never ask you to give that up for me. I want you to have the ocean, with its glimmersharks and eel quartets and endless depths. I will do everything in my power to find a way to bridge our two worlds so you never feel like you are giving up anything to be with me. I want to broaden your world, not restrict it. I want you. All of you. On land, on water, in between. Forever.”
He reached for her, and she let herself be pulled across his lap. Their lips met, full of the fear, the hope, the promises, the potential.
And when they broke away, Iris rested her head against his chest, listening to the heart she knew for certain belonged to her.
“Do I smell hot pretzels?”
He grinned. “You think I would risk this conversation without carbs?” He reached for the bag. “I come bearing snacks and sincerity.”
“You’re lucky I accept bribes.”
Oh, he was fully aware just how lucky he was.
“Let’s go home,” she said, reaching for his hand.