Chapter 9
THEA
“Sugar cookies with frosting or without?”
I think for a moment.
Josh is definitely a frosting type of guy. I’m not sure how I know that, but it feels right. So I write without on the little whiteboard I hold in my lap.
“Okay, show us your answers!” Nora says into the mic she’s holding.
We all—the twelve people sitting on the stage in the middle of Main Street, the six pairs who will be competing in Merry Mayhem—turn our boards to show the audience our answers.
There are cheers and groans, and we all lean to look at our partners’ answers.
I was right. Josh said frosting.
“You like plain sugar cookies?” he asks, mock-horrified.
“I like all cookies,” I say. “But given the choice Nora just gave, yeah, without.”
That’s a total lie. Of course, I would choose frosted sugar cookies. With lots of colored sugar and sprinkles, too. What am I? On a cleanse?
Actually, even when I’m trying to reduce my sugar intake, I’d still take frosted sugar cookies with sprinkles over plain ones. I’m no heathen. And skip the cookies? Please.
However, these questions are designed to help the town get to know us and demonstrate how well-matched each pair is. It’s not like we have to be fully in tune, of course, but this is fun for the observers.
So far, Josh and I are a perfect match.
We’d both choose hot chocolate over eggnog, wrapping gifts versus gift bags, and now this cookie question. I pretended to like eggnog better, and now blew the cookie question, though. We can not seem perfect for one another. He’s Violet’s boyfriend.
Violet does like eggnog better, is totally a gift bag girl, and hates frosting, though.
I shut down those thoughts.
So what? It’s not like those things are actually important in a relationship.
The laughter and chatter around the sugar cookie question quiets, and Nora asks, “Real tree or artificial?”
Okay, this one is easy. I’m a busy, working, single mom.
I really like having an artificial tree.
It’s much less of a mess, and I can just pull it out of the closet, prop it up, and, thanks to buying one that’s pre-lit, plug it in and be done with everything but the ornaments.
And I love decorating it with Ruth. We make homemade pizza, put on a Christmas movie, and decorate together one night in early December.
Josh, on the other hand, has to be a real-tree guy. He’s rugged and surely has no problem using an ax. He probably goes out and chops his own down.
So, I can answer this one honestly and be the opposite of him.
I wipe “plain” off my board and write “artificial” in red marker.
“Okay, time!” Nora says. “Let’s see your answers!”
We all turn our boards toward the audience.
I lean to look at Josh’s answer. “No way.”
“Oh, absolutely,” he says. “Artificial trees are much safer. They’re generally made of flame-resistant materials. Real trees get dry and are much more of a fire risk.”
Of course. He’s a rugged firefighter who can swing an ax because he’s a firefighter.
“Next!” Nora announces. “Christmas gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?”
All the contestants lean over their boards, but I have to think for a second again.
This one is a little tougher. Is Josh the type to not be able to wait for something he really wants, or does he like building anticipation?
Does he like to just jump into the good stuff, or does he like to drag the fun out?
And why is my mind taking those questions into completely dirty and inappropriate directions?
But it definitely takes me too long to stop the thoughts of is he against the wall, can’t even make it to the bedroom type, or would he tease and tempt and take it slow?
I tip my head back and groan.
I hear a deep chuckle to my right.
“There’s no right or wrong. There are pros and cons of each.”
Oh, God, that’s for sure.
I look over at him.
Both.
He’d be both.
Sometimes he’d tease and tempt and build it all up, and sometimes he’d just not be able to wait and would make a woman feel like she was the most irresistible thing he’d ever seen. Or tasted.
I slam my eyes shut. Jesus, where did that come from?
“Okay, time!” Nora calls.
I quickly answer the question, scrawling a word on my whiteboard without thinking. It’s just a silly game before three days of silly games. I have to stop making this a bigger deal than it is. I have to stop making it about things it’s not about.
Josh and I are going to spend some time together, sure, but it will all be very public, and a lot of it will be happening outside, so we’ll be wearing extra layers of clothes, not fewer. No bare skin. No worries about me getting distracted by his shoulders, pecs, and abs…
“Yes!” Josh laughs and holds up his hand, palm toward me, fingers spread.
I look at him with confusion. Then I look at his whiteboard. Where he wrote “both”.
I look down at my board. Where I also wrote “both”.
Oh my God.
He grabs my wrist and lifts my hand, slapping it against his in a high five.
Nora is laughing into the microphone. “That wasn’t an option!”
“But we answered the same way anyway,” Josh says with a grin. “Definitely a perfect pair!”
What was the question again? Not sex against the wall versus long, slow, teasing sex on a bed…
Oh, right, gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning.
Well…yeah, both.
Nora shakes her head and grins at the audience. “Well, I guess we know to keep an eye on those two. Rules don’t seem to matter.”
Everyone laughs, but I stifle a groan. Rules do matter. Especially the one about not developing a crush on your sister’s boyfriend.
Apparently, we don’t receive points for matching our answers in this “get to know the contestants” challenge. We get points based on audience vote. Which is probably good. I purposefully tried not to answer the same way Josh did, and we still got three out of five matches.
However, Max and Mitchell, the brothers who had been dying to compete in Merry Mayhem since the first year and had only turned eighteen two months ago, matched on every single question. Big surprise, they’re identical twins.
Jesse and Brad, who have been married for thirty years or more, also got every match. No big shock there.
Beckett, a hometown guy who plays for our minor league hockey team, and his sister Sutton, matched on four out of five.
But the other set of twins, seventy-something-year-old Patty and Muriel Coffelt, didn’t match on a single question.
That is also not a shock.
Patty and Muriel fight about everything.
Everything. Sometimes it’s a disagreement over politics, and sometimes it’s an accusation that one of them stole the other’s socks.
Big, small, important, ridiculous, it doesn’t matter.
Patty and Muriel's arguments are like white noise in Rebel. We’ve all just gotten used to holding onto things like lamps, paperweights, plates, and cutlery when a fight breaks out—they’ve been known to throw things, and we just try to keep the breakable and more lethal things out of reach.
Interestingly, Sam and Ashley only matched on two questions.
Not that it means anything. They’re silly holiday questions. They don’t mean anything about a real relationship.
Look at me and Josh. We’re just…
What the hell are we?
We literally just met. We’re not even friends. We’re…
Jesus, we’re future in-laws.
Maybe. I mean…
Fuck.
Anyway, it doesn’t mean anything that Sam and Ashley sucked at this challenge. But it’s interesting.
“Okay, just leave your whiteboards and markers on your chairs,” Nora tells us.
“Things will kick off tomorrow!” Jingle bells—not the song, just a cacophony of jingly bells—rings out, a muted boom sounds, and green and red confetti rains down on us from the confetti canon next to Nora. The crowd cheers.
“Nora loves confetti,” I tell Josh with a laugh, pulling a piece off my bottom lip and brushing red and green paper from my hair.
When I look up, I freeze. Josh is staring at my mouth. I’d worry I still had confetti stuck there, but I can feel that’s not the case.
I press my lips together, but they keep tingling.
“Be sure to keep your phones close,” Nora says. “The first challenge is the relay race! Right here at ten a.m.! Unless…”
I finally manage to pull my gaze to Nora.
She turns her grin to all of us. “…unless there’s a surprise challenge before then! Be sure you all keep your phones charged and on! The next three days are going to be… lit!”
There’s an expectant pause. But nothing happens. A few people laugh, but there’s an anticipation in the air that makes everyone just…wait.
Nora frowns and looks in the direction of the tree. “It’s going to be lit!” she repeats, a little louder.
Everyone follows her gaze.
Again, nothing happens.
“Sorry!” we hear someone yell from down near the tree. “We have a glitch! I’m on it! Just a sec!”
It’s Everly Levette. The Parks and Rec department hires her company to do lawncare and landscaping for the city, and her contract also includes a lot of outdoor decorating for events, including the huge Christmas tree.
“Okay, do it again!” Everly yells again a few seconds later. “I’ve got it now!”
Nora snorts. “All together now! It’s gonna be…”
Everyone calls out “Lit!” together.
The tree lights up with red glowing lights from top to bottom, and everyone cheers as if that was how it was supposed to happen all along.
The contestants all stand, turning over their whiteboards and making small talk.
Which means that Sam, Ashley in tow, makes a beeline for me.
Dammit.
“Hi, Thea,” he greets with a big smile. “Nice to see you.”
“Hi, Sam.”
He looks expectantly at Josh.
But he knows who Josh is. Nora introduced all of us.
She even included that Josh was Violet’s boyfriend, that he was the one who pulled her from her car and took her to the hospital, and that I was taking her place for Merry Mayhem since she can’t be here.
We got a lot of “ahhs” and “ooohs” for that.
There’s no question that Josh is a fan-favorite going into this competition.