Chapter 41
GIO
While Iseult is back in her home in Cherry Grove, taking a bath with her arm stitched and bandaged, I pace back and forth in her bedroom, attempting to contain the pummeling of my pulse.
We barely said a word to one another on the way back. She was content with my arms around her, and I didn’t want to ruin the moment by telling her how angry I am at her for lying to me. She could’ve gotten herself killed.
I could’ve lost her. I could’ve lost the only woman I’ve ever loved, and that fear hasn’t left me.
She got herself shot, and fuck, it could’ve been much worse.
But at least it was only a graze on her shoulder.
One of Patrick’s docs patched her up and said she should be good as new in a few weeks.
Red, of course, acts like it’s no big deal.
But to me, it is. She’s mine. Mine to worry about. Always.
The water of the adjacent shower turns off, and a few minutes later, she’s coming out, wearing a loose-fitted black t-shirt and black leggings.
Her hair is damp, pulled up into a messy bun, and her gorgeous face has not an ounce of makeup on.
I could stare at her for my entire life and never get bored.
As soon as I lay eyes on her, every ounce of anger simply vanishes. And in its place is just a man who’s completely obsessed with his woman. All I want to do right in this moment is hold her and tell her how much I really love her.
“Hi,” she says as she closes the door. “We should talk.”
Inhaling a fiery breath, I erase the distance between us, my gaze sweeping over every inch of her face.
“Don’t ever put yourself in danger like that,” I whisper, cupping her cheek, my forehead bowing against hers.
“I didn’t realize how badly I was worried about you until I found you.
My heart felt like it was ripping right out of my chest, bambina.
” I dart back to look at her, her brows drawn, her own emotions evident.
“The thought of losing you makes me insane.”
“We already established that you’re crazy.” A faint smile falls to her lips.
“Of course I’m crazy.” I brush my mouth with hers. “Crazy about you.”
She sighs. She fucking sighs like in those damn romantic movies that I’ll never admit I watch.
“You could’ve told me where you were. I would’ve given you space,” I say.
She chuckles. “Oh, come on, Gio.” She throws her good arm over my shoulder.
“Let’s be honest. You never would’ve done that.
You would’ve stormed in, and who knows what would’ve happened.
” Her eyes press to a brief close. “I had no idea Kora was going to betray us, and neither did you. Maybe the outcome would’ve been worse had you gone in.
” She palms my cheek. “I told you I could handle myself.”
“This has nothing to do with your ability to keep yourself safe, baby.” I lower my mouth to her forehead and leave a tender kiss behind. “I know you can. Believe me, I know… But as your future husband, could you maybe not make me worry like that from time to time? That’s all I’m asking for.”
Her eyes caress me, lingering on mine for so long, I don’t even know if she’ll say something in return. But then her lips spread into a wide grin, and that smile… It brings my soul to life.
“I love you so much, Gio.”
My heart pummels, and I almost have to wonder if I heard right. Because that was the first time she ever said it.
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that, because it almost sounded like…”
She fights a laugh. “It was a slip of the tongue.”
I inhale, my chest swelling. And I close my eyes, feeling like a damn giant on top of a mountain.
“Say it again,” I whisper. “Please, baby, say it again.”
“I love you.” She kisses the corner of my mouth, and I groan, my palm gripping the back of her head.
“Again.”
“I love you,” she whispers, and this time as she does, I kiss her with all the mustered-up passion, our love filling the void I’ve lived with for so long.
Never realizing what it meant to truly have everything.
ISEULT
“You wanted to speak to me?” I walk into my father’s study the following day as he places a book on his floor-to-ceiling bookshelf.
I used to read a lot when I was a kid, but I stopped after Mom died.
She loved to read. It was her favorite thing, so of course, it became mine.
She’d sit in the outdoor gazebo and curl around a good romance novel.
She’d get lost in the world, and we’d talk about it too.
About good men and how they should treat women.
I know she’d approve of Gio if she met him.
That fulfills me somehow, to have her approval without actually having it.
My father had gotten the bookshelf for her. I guess that was one of the ways he showed her he loved her.
“Sit.” He gestures toward his chair and glances down at my shoulder with a strain of his features. “How are you feeling?” He takes a seat across from me.
“I’ll be fine, Dad.” I shrug. “You know I’ve had worse.”
He nods. “I know, but as your father, that doesn’t make me feel any better. I never wanted this life for you, Iseult.” He blows out a breath. “I wanted you married, happy with some kids. But I ruined that for you, didn’t I?”
“Of course not. Being married doesn’t guarantee happiness, Dad.”
He chuckles, shaking his head. “You’re not wrong. But still, I wanted you to be happy and that’s what I saw for you.”
“Maybe it’s not too late.”
“Yes, Gio… That’s why I wanted to talk to you.” He pauses, his eyes rapt on my face. “About what I said to you last time…” He clears his throat and straightens his spine.
Apologizing isn’t my father’s strong suit. He reacts before thinking sometimes. And after what happened to my sister after having to kill someone I thought was my best friend, I don’t even need an apology. I just want to be welcomed back.
“It’s fine.” I give him a smile to ease the tension on his face. “As long as you’re not throwing me out again, we’re good.”
“Shite, darling, you know I couldn’t last a day without you. I’m old and stubborn and I felt you violated a code of honor I hold dear. But I know now, that wasn’t true.”
“He told you?”
Gio hadn’t talked to me about having a discussion with my father, so this is all news to me.
“He did, and I’m glad. He really loves you.”
“How could he not?” I raise my chin.
He chuckles. “Your mother would’ve loved to see you smiling like that again. I have no doubt she’s been watching over you, over all you kids, from up there.” He points to the heavens.
I don’t believe in God myself, but I can respect his belief. I do hope she’s watching me, though, and I hope I made her proud.
“So, you love him, then?” My father leans into his chair.
“Unfortunately.” I roll my eyes.
“Well, that sounds like marriage to me.” His laughter fills the room, and I laugh with him. “I wish you’d felt comfortable enough telling me all of this so we could’ve avoided my heatedness.”
I scoff. “Really? Come on. You would’ve brushed it off and told me to find someone else.”
“Not if I thought it was serious.”
“It wasn’t then. It is now.”
“Well, then I will support your union. But I want the marriage done fast. Will that be a problem?”
“Not if Fernanda has anything to say about it.”
That woman can plan a wedding in a day.
“Poor lad. I don’t know how he’s going to tolerate you,” he teases.
“I’m not so bad. After the first few years, he’ll get used to me.” A grin spreads across my face.
“You don’t know what it does to me to see your face shining like that.” He huffs out a burdened breath. “I never really told you how sorry I was for what he did to you.”
His eyes grow sad, and my heart clutches in a tight fist, knowing exactly who he is.
“No.” I shake my head, slanting forward to grab his hand. “What happened wasn’t on you. Sergey was insane. You didn’t do anything to provoke it.” I squeeze his knuckles. “I’m okay, Dad. You don’t have to worry about me.”
He nods and closes his eyes for a quick moment.
“I have something for you.” He lets go of my hand and rummages inside his desk drawer. “Your mother made me promise to give this to you for when you have your first real love.”
My heart skips a beat. “What?”
“She left you a letter, darling.”
“She did?” I pant and sniffle back tears that come storming in like a gale brewing on the horizon, waiting its turn to erupt.
To have her words, to have a piece of her… It would mean everything to me.
“She had this thing she did,” he explains, handing me a closed envelope, my name scribbled in fancy cursive. “She wrote you all a letter for important times in your adult life.”
“Mom,” I whisper with a cry, running my fingertips over each curve.
“I hated that she did it because it meant she was planning for the chance she would die before me, but she kept on doing it, regardless of what I said. And I’m really glad she did.” His voice grows tender.
It’s then I really see it in his eyes. His love for her. In his own way, he loved my mother too.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask, afraid to open it, my heart ramming in my rib cage.
“She was specific. Only give it to you on certain occasions. And I’d never break her trust.”
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“Yeah.” He scrubs his face with a palm. “Enough heavy stuff. How about we go and get some food and drinks? The cooks have prepared a feast for everyone. The Marinos all should be here shortly.”
“I just need a minute with Mom,” I tell him.
“Of course you do, darling. You come down when you’re ready. Oh, before I forget, there’s one last thing. Hadleigh called. Hudson is missing.”
“What? What do you mean, missing?”
He shrugs. “He went to work the other day and never came home.”
“Are we helping her find him?”
“We will, but we can’t let her know how we do it.”
As I settle beside Gio in one of the spare rooms at my father’s house, my hands tremble around the letter, afraid I’ll burst into tears at the very first line.
My vision clouds while his hand gently caresses my back.
“It’s okay, baby. I’m right here. Not going anywhere. Unless you want me to.” He gazes softly, and I shake my head.
“No. I want you to stay. It’s just a lot for me. I never thought I’d hear from her again, you know?”
“Of course.”
This is going to be something I cherish, waiting for all the letters she has written.
“Can you open it?” I grimace. “Because I’ll just sit here all night staring at it.”
He chuckles. “Sure, bambina. I’d do anything for you.”
His words, the way he stares longingly into my eyes… I feel his emotions reflected back. Never thought a man like him could ever love a broken woman like me. But he loves me with his whole heart. I can just see it right there in his eyes.
I’ve spent so many days telling myself I was okay, that the scars on my body and the wounds I carried in my heart in silence didn’t bother me. That my anxiety was just the way it was.
But I was wrong.
Hopefully, I can gather the courage to talk to someone, a shrink or something. It’s worth a shot. I never believed in therapists, and honestly, I don’t think they work for everyone. But I can’t say that until I actually try it for myself.
Gently, with every care in the world, he opens the envelope and hands it back to me. With a woosh of a breath and a final glance at him, I remove the letter and start to read.
My Dearest Iseult,
If you’re reading this, I’m probably not here OR you snuck into your father’s study and found this. If that’s the case, I’m grounding you.
I let out a bout of laughter even as the tears claim my emotions.
But if that’s not the case and your father gave you this letter after I’m gone, then I hope you’re not crying. Because I’m not sad knowing you found true love.
I know sometimes you thought the books I read were cliché, but I truly believe that some people are meant to find that kind of love, that level of commitment and self-sacrifice. And if you have found that in someone, then you’re richer than most of the people in this world.
Whoever he is, I hope he takes care of you. And I hope you take care of him too. That’s what makes love work: a mutual devotion and constant work. Keep working. Because love is worth it.
I’m so proud of you, my darling girl. I don’t have to be here to know that. You’re special, Iseult, and I never want you to forget your light and that warrior heart, no matter who tries to take it.
Knowing you, you’ll walk right up to them and snatch it right back.
Until my next letter.
I love you forever.
Love,
Mom
The tears have pooled in my eyes as I start the letter all over again, memorizing each word, knowing how much it must’ve hurt her to write this.
I wonder when the next letter will come. I can’t wait for it.
His arms circle around me, and I slant my head on his shoulder and cry.
And with Gio, I know it’s okay to cry. Because being in love means being who you are, and I can be that way with him.