Chapter 44 – Two Weeks Later
KAYLA
TWO WEEKS LATER
He holds me in his arms before bed like he’s done it his whole life. This man is perfect, and the one thing that makes him even more attractive is that he doesn’t even see it. But I’ll be there to show him just how special he truly is.
It’s funny, though, how the man who once asked me if he was holding me right now knows just how to do it.
Staring off at the ceiling, I watch his mind race like it’s doing it right in front of me. I know what he’s thinking about. What we’ve spent days talking about. His family. His mother.
It’s hard. I get it. There’s so much trauma built up, like scar tissue. It’s hard to feel past those wounds. But I know he wants to. He’s never actually said it, but I know him well enough by now to see it there in his eyes.
Forgiving her, letting all that go, will give him healing, and in the end, that’s what matters to me.
Maybe we’re not meant to heal in our entirety because not everything can be forgotten, but people can learn to live with their trauma and accept it without it weighing them down.
It’s something I’ve been learning to do myself.
While I’ve been healing from my bullet wound, I’ve been doing some soul-searching of my own.
The first step was finding a therapist. And that part has been hard.
I know Dr. Collins didn’t do anything wrong.
He was set up by Cammie, but the entire ordeal has lowered my ability to trust people even more.
But I know I need to have someone to talk to—about my past, about the inability to have children.
I won’t allow the grief to eat away at me. Not anymore.
“Do you think you’ll go to Sophia’s birthday party?” I gaze up at him, tucking my hand under my chin.
His lips jerk as he catches my eye. “That’s what I was just thinking about.”
I know.
But I don’t tell him that.
“I’m not sure.” He roughs a breath. “I want to see her, but I don’t know if I’m ready to see all of them and act like we’re some fucking family we never were.”
I gather his palm in my hand. “Hey, it’s okay if you don’t want to. You’re allowed to say no. But if there’s a part of you that wants to, that’s okay too, baby.”
He kisses my knuckles and his throat bobs. “I’m at peace with it. I don’t need them. I have you.”
He grasps my hips and flips me on top of his hard body. As soon as he does, when those eyes hold mine, that spot between my thighs aches for him, needing him badly.
It’s been so long since he’s been inside me, since I’ve felt that connection between us. Now that the doctor has given me the all-clear, I’ve wanted to, but he’s been the one scared of hurting me.
I rock my hips into his stiff length, biting into my lower lip. “You’ll always have me, Adriel.”
My lips lower to his and I stroke them, the tip of my tongue lacing past his full, firm lips.
“Kayla…” A growl fountains out from deep in his chest. “We can’t.”
I drown out the voices in his head with a touch of my mouth to his, and I kiss him slowly, his groaning whispering life into my heart.
His fingers sink into my hair, and he pushes his cock into me, snapping his hand around my waves until my scalp aches with excitement. He wrenches me back with a jerk of his hand, his gaze intense and earth-shattering. And in this moment, I can feel it, the unspoken way in which he loves me.
He may not be capable of giving me those words, but what good are words when you can’t feel them? When they’re nothing but lies? How many live that life? How many are happy?
But I am. I’ve never been happier, more fulfilled, than I am with him. So no, I don’t need words if he can’t give them to me. I’m content having him the way he is.
As for me, I plan on telling him how much I love him as much as I can. Because this beautiful man has never been told he’s loved, and it’s my job to prove to him that he’s worthy of it.
“I love you, Adriel.”
His inhale is sharp, eyes poignant just as he presses his forehead to mine.
“I love hearing you say that,” he whispers.
“I plan to for the rest of my life.”
His brows knit as he stares back at me. “I want to show you something.”
“Oh?” Excitement shoots out from me, wondering what that could be.
He moves me to the side and sits up, lifting his shirt over his head. And at first, I don’t see it. Not until my eyes make out something new on his tattoo that wasn’t there before.
Emotions ache behind my eyes as my gaze bounces between the new art and him.
Carefully, he watches me as I take it all in.
Faces of two wolves, embracing until they form a heart.
One with green eyes and one with the same color as mine.
My chin shakes as I fight not to cry. A black bird flies above them, and beneath, the words say, In love there’s no fear. Not with you. I love you, little wolf.
“This,” I choke on a cry. “This is beautiful.”
My arms jump around him, and he holds me close, kissing my temple.
“I’m trying,” he says.
“Never had a doubt, stalker.” A grin spreads across my face.
He sighs, fisting my hair in his grip, kissing me roughly before nipping my bottom lip. His eyes turn hooded, mouth brushing mine. “I’m gonna fuck you now.”
“Promise to make it hurt?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “But I promise to make it feel good.”
My heart leaps at the emotional tug of his voice, and when he smashes his lips to mine, I no longer care how he does it, because all I want is him.
His expert hands guide the clothes off my body, the strap of my tank top lowering, his mouth following the path until his lips lock around my nipple, sucking and flicking while his other hand tugs off my shorts.
I’m bare and slick, craving this man with a passion so deep, I bathe in the fragility and strength of a love like ours.
His palms cup both of my breasts as he takes his time, causing my eyes to roll.
It’s then that his lips move south, kissing down my abdomen, opening my thighs until his mouth closes around my clit.
He sucks it tighter, while two fingers slowly slip inside me and curve.
Hitting my G-spot, he drives deeper with every stroke, my nails clawing his shoulder blades as I cry and beg for release.
“Oh God, yes, don’t stop…”
My toes curl as he continues to take me ruthlessly, his eyes on mine, daring me to look away.
I know he likes it when our gazes lock, the connection in that moment bringing us to a whole other level.
He pounds his fingers into me until I gasp a moan, unable to stop the tidal wave about to rush over me.
And when his teeth graze around my throbbing clit, I scream out his name and his alone, because he owns me until my very last breath.
He doesn’t give me reprieve. Grabbing my hips, he positions me on top of him, his hard length nudging inside me as my hands land on his shoulders.
“Ride my cock, baby. Show me how good you can take it.”
Without his eyes leaving mine, I slowly lower myself onto him, my mouth parting with a desperate cry as he gives me every thick inch of him.
“Fuuuck!” He palms my ass and without warning slams the rest of himself inside me until my body’s trembling. “Sorry, babe.” He smirks. “Just couldn’t help myself.”
With a groan, I press my chest to his and kiss him while he rolls my hair around his wrist. His hips bow into me with abandon, and he’s the one who’s fucking me.
But I don’t mind. I like it when he takes control. I want him to.
His teeth sink into my jaw until I’m climbing once more, the release ebbing through me. He’s taking it easy on me with my injury, and I know it’s because he worries about me. It’s that love for me that shines through everything he does. And it only makes me love him more.
We lose ourselves in one another, free to be ourselves. No masks between us any longer. Not literally, and certainly not figuratively.
He flips me beneath him, his hand fastening around my throat as he drives deeper, harder, kissing me, nipping my lips, sucking my tongue into his mouth.
My nails score up his back, my ankles hooking into his behind as I pull him in even deeper. When he wrenches back to stare down at me, I find untethered affection within his gaze. It unearths me.
His knuckles feather down my face as he fucks me slower, yet with more passion than I’ve ever felt.
“I never thought I’d have this.” His thumb strokes my jaw. “But somehow I found forever here in your eyes.”
Those words send my emotions into chaos. Because when I was least expecting it, I found forever in his too.
His lips find mine again in the heat of our desire, in the wake of the binding of our souls as one. And together, we reach the precipice. No longer alone. No longer hungry or starved for love nor affection. Because we have it now. We have it and we’ve earned it, and no one will ever take it away.
When we come down from the high, my arms clasp around him and I cozy up my face into his chest, feeling the weight of his heartbeats thumping as quickly as mine.
His arms drape around me, tighter and tighter, and a grin widens on my face.
“I think I finally figured out how to hold you right.” His warm breath across my ear has me sighing.
“You always did, Adriel. Even when you didn’t think so.”
He growls, snapping his palm around my nape, and pulls me in for a languid kiss.
This right here is what I once always dreamed of. But with him, I somehow found it, and I know I’ll always have it. I’ll always have him.
Nothing can break us, because together, we’ll break them instead.