Mia Amata

Chapter 18

I woke up and looked at the clock. I was surprised to see it was 9:30 am already. I got up and used the bathroom, opened the curtains, then crawled back into bed. I curled up under the warm blankets, looking out the window. There was a deer in the yard with her baby. I lay there, content to just gaze out the window when my cell phone went off. I rolled over, picking it up. “Morning Mia.” the message read. It was from Jacob.

I smiled. “Morning,” I replied back. Another text came a couple seconds later, “Can’t wait to see you. I’ll pick you up at 11:30.”

“Perfect,” I answered.

After lying there for a little while longer, I got out of bed and took a shower. I put on the blue sundress that Eva had given me and took some care with my makeup and hair. I completed the outfit with what little jewelry I had and my sandals. I looked in the mirror, pleased with what I saw. I had healed up pretty well; the makeup covered what remained of the bruising on my face.

My ribs and abdomen were still a little bruised and sore, but much improved. I went out to the kitchen, making a pot of coffee, and took a cup out on the deck. Lucky ran around the yard playing for a little bit then stopped, coming to lay at my feet. My phone chirped. I looked to see a message from Randy. “Overslept, did I miss coffee?”

“Having it now,” I replied.

“Be right over,” came her reply.

A few minutes later, Randy was walking up to the porch. “Well, don’t you look pretty this morning. You didn’t need to get all dressed up for me.” She laughed. She went inside to get a cup of coffee and grabbed a cinnamon roll too then came back out.

“Josh still sleeping?” I asked.

“No.He is doing some laundry and getting some things ready to go back to work. He has to leave after lunch.” She was clearly sad about his leaving, but she looked at me slyly, “I see you didn’t ask about Jacob.” She looked at me and raised an eyebrow. “Why do I have a feeling you already know he is up, not to mention exactly what he is doing?”

I smiled. “I do.”

Randy smiled back, “Did something happen last night that I missed out on?”

“Yes.”

“Spill it, girl! Tell me all you can without the dirty details!”

“Well, let’s see. Norman Bates killed a lady in the shower…”

“Mattie!” Randy exclaimed. “Not in the movie! What happened last night between you and Jacob?” I brought her up to date on my relationship with Jacob, leaving out the most personal details of course. I also told her we planned to spend the day together. “I am so excited for you! He is falling head over heels for you!”

“I think you might be right. Oh, Randy, I don’t know what to do.” I sighed.

“Why?” she asked.

“We really seem to connect, but I just recently got out of a terrible relationship and am pregnant. What man would want something to do with me now?”

“Stop that!” Randy said. “You are a very pretty woman. Not to mention smart, witty, with a fantastic personality. I know I haven’t known you for very long, but I feel like you are like a sister to me. What guy wouldn’t want to get to know you better? Right now, that is all it is, just two single people attracted to each other going to spend some time together.”

I nodded, “Yes, that’s true. I guess you are right, we just met Sunday, so nothing to lose right?”

“Exactly!” She exclaimed. “Plus, Jacob is a great guy. I’ve known him for almost as long as I have known Josh. You two would make a great couple.”

“Couple,” I said. “I don’t know if that is what I am looking for right now.”

“Why not? Are you still in love with the father of the baby?” I thought to myself that I just left my husband, but I truthfully had not been in love with him for years, he beat that out of me a long time ago.

I replied honestly, “No, I don’t think I ever really loved him. I think it was more that I wanted to be loved. He just flattered me, saying all the right things, making me think it was love. Now I know it wasn’t.”

“Look,” she said, “I’m not pushing you to make a commitment with Jacob at all. All I am saying is why not give it a chance? You deserve to be happy, just as much as he does. If it works out between you two, great. If not, you will end up with another good friend, which is still a win for both of you. Now I’m going to get going before he gets here.” We both stood up and took our coffee cups into the kitchen.

She gave me a hug. “Look, just have fun today with Jacob. Don’t sweat over it. Let things go where they may.”

“I will,” I replied.

With that, she turned and left. I washed up the coffee cups. Looking at the clock, I realized that Jacob would be here soon. I fed Lucky, filling his water dish as well. “What do you think about Jacob?” I asked Lucky. Lucky looked up at me, wagging his tail and barking. “Sounds like you approve. I think I’m crazy for even considering the idea after everything. Oh well, I’m not going to worry about that right now. We will just have a good time today.” Lucky barked and wagged his tail again.

A few minutes later I heard Jacob’s truck pull up to the house, then a knock on the door. I opened the door, letting Jacob in. He walked in, looking at me with those intense blue eyes of his. “You look beautiful,” he said, leaning down to kiss me.

When he pulled back, I said, “Thank you. Let me just grab my purse. I’m ready to go.”

“Great. Hey, Lucky!” He knelt down, petting Lucky while I went back to my room, grabbing my purse.

I walked back out; he was standing there with Lucky at his side.

“Looks like you have made a friend,” I smiled.

“He is a great dog,” Jacob said looking down at him.

“I’m ready to go if you are,” I said.

“I’m not ready yet,” he said. I looked at him questioning, he bent over kissing me again. “Now I am ready.” He smiled. I smiled shyly. This was going to take some getting used to. It still made me uneasy. We went out to his pickup. He walked me to the passenger side, opening the door for me. I started to climb in when a wave of dizziness came over me, I would have fallen to the ground had it not been for Jacob catching me.

“Mia Amata!” he cried, looking concerned, “Honey!” He picked me up, gently placing me on the seat of his truck. “Are you OK?”

I took some deep breaths, then nodded. “I’m OK. ”

“Are you sure? You and the baby are OK?” That surprised me a little bit, he seemed to really be concerned about a baby that wasn’t his.

“Yes, the baby and I are fine.” I smiled at him. “The doctor explained that sometimes dizziness and nausea can happen during pregnancy. I’m fine now.”

He relaxed a little, reached out, and stroked my face. “Are you sure you want to go today?” He kissed me gently.

I smiled at him, “I’m sure. I’m pregnant, not dying.”

That got a smile from him. He kissed me again, then shut the door for me. He walked around the truck, climbing into the driver’s side. I buckled my seatbelt asking, “So where are you taking me?” I asked.

He smiled, reaching out, taking my hand in his as if it was the most natural thing to do. It felt… nice. “Well, I thought about taking you to a fancy restaurant but changed my mind. Instead, I would like to take you to my most favorite spot where we can have a picnic.” He nodded toward the back where he had a blanket with some pillows.

“That sounds lovely, but… um… I don’t see any food?”

He laughed, “I called in an order to one of my favorite restaurants, we will stop there to pick the food up. I hope you like fried chicken and potato salad.”

“Sounds great,” I said.

“Good,” Jacob looked at me. “I really want some place private, so we can get to know each other better, I thought a quiet picnic would be better than a noisy restaurant.” Pretty soon he pulled into a restaurant parking lot, telling me he would be right back he went in to get our food. He was soon back, putting the food in the backseat. He climbed back in, saying, “I hope bottled water is OK, I didn’t know what you would like to drink.”

“That’s fine, I really don’t drink soda. The food smells good. I’m eating for two, so I hope you brought enough!” I replied making him laugh. He pulled out on the street, starting to drive out of town.

“We will be there in about 20 minutes,” he said. He reached over, taking my hand again. It felt very natural. “That house right there is where my parents live,” he said, nodding to a large two-story house. He drove a little past it, turning off the main road.

“Are we on their property?” I asked.

“Yes, this road leads to my favorite place. Somewhere I grew up, spending a lot of my childhood.” We drove along for a few minutes through some trees when we finally came to an opening .

“Oh, Jacob,” I exclaimed, “it’s beautiful!” Sitting before us was a small cabin with wildflowers around it.

To the north of the cabin was a lake. There was a pier going out over the lake with a small rowboat on the shore next to it. It could have been a painting.

He stopped the truck at the cabin, saying, “Come on, we are almost there.”

“This isn’t it?” I asked, confused.

“Not quite.” He smiled at me, climbing out of the truck. He came around, helping me out of the truck. “Come on,” he said, taking my hand. “I’ll walk back for the food and stuff in a minute.”

He walked me down to the pier, helping me up the steps, walking out to the bench at the end. He was showing me different things, then pointed down at the water. I looked; it was so clear you could watch the fish swimming by, several feet down. “I fish here a lot; fishing is really good. Stay here, give me a minute to get things ready.”

I sat down, watching him walk to the rowboat. He did a few things to it, then went to the truck to get the picnic things, putting those in the boat. Walking back to me, he said, “Your chariot awaits Madam.” I smiled nervously, taking his outstretched hand.

We walked over to the boat, he helped me in, holding my hand until I was able to take my seat. He was wearing shorts, took his shoes off, putting them in the boat. He pushed the boat out into the water a little, wading in with it. He leaped in the boat smoothly and sat down taking up the oars. He started rowing, we were soon on our way out into the lake. I trailed my hand in the water while I looked around at the scenery.

He turned the boat gradually north, pointing ahead of us. “See that huge pine to the north? The one with the huge nest toward the top?” I shaded my eyes with my hand, looking in the direction he indicated. “Oh, yes I see it.”

“That is where we are headed. It’s an island that my family owns. That is an eagle’s nest, they build there every year.” As if on cue, an eagle soared past us, swooping down to the lake. He came back up with a fish in its claws, then flew to the nest on the island.

“Look at him!” I exclaimed. “So beautiful!”

Jacob smiled at me, “You will probably get to see him close up if he stays in the nest long enough.”

We continued toward the island with Jacob pointing out things as we went, turtles sunning themselves on a log, a blue heron fishing toward the shore. It was obvious that he was very happy here, very at home. When we were closer to the island, I could see the eagle in his nest eating his fish. Jacob steered the rowboat around to the other side of the island, where there was a beach that he aimed for. He climbed out of the rowboat, pulling it up on the shore. He reached for my hand. When I stood up, he put his hands on my waist lifting me out with ease.

“We swam here all the time as kids.” He pointed to a rope that hung from a tree. “We would swing out on that, let go, landing as far out as we could.” I smiled at the vision that gave me in my head. He handed me the blankets and pillows. He then grabbed the food and drinks and started leading me up to the beach. “Come on, it’s just inshore a little.”

We followed a path to a small clearing. There, in the middle was a stream running over a bed of rocks. “There is a natural spring from underground here; the stream leads to the lake.”

We followed the stream to a small pond with water that was so clear it seemed almost nonexistent. We both stopped, quietly watching a deer drink out of the pond. She shifted her body so that we could see a little fawn lying in the grass beside her. The deer suddenly looked up, seeing us watching them, but didn’t run away. She watched us warily, moving back between us and her fawn, hiding it from view.

We didn’t want to disturb her, so we crossed to the other side of the stream, carefully crossing on some rocks sticking out of the water, Jacob holding my hand, so I didn’t slip. We slowly walked to the other side of the pond across from the deer and her baby, not wanting to scare them away.

“Here we are,” Jacob said, “I thought we could picnic here.” He motioned to a huge flat rock, like a small patio at the side of the pond. He set the food down, taking the blankets from me, and he spread them out on the rock. I lay the pillows down on the blankets. I sat down while he brought the food over.

We sat there, enjoying our lunch, watching the deer across the pond. The little fawn had gotten up, running around frolicking in the tall grass closer to the trees. Soon, the deer led her baby into the trees. We finished our meal, talking about the wildlife around here. Jacob lay back on one of the pillows, watching me.

I had my knees pulled up with my arms wrapped around them, looking at the pond with the little fish swimming around. A turtle surfaced on the other side, climbed out on a rock, and sat there in the sun. I watched another small turtle swim after a small fish. I could feel Jacob’s eyes on me, but I felt nervous and scared. I was alone with a man I barely knew. What was I thinking? It wasn’t necessarily an awkward silence, but I felt that he had something on his mind he wanted to talk to me about.

As if right on cue Jacob quietly said, “Mia, can I ask you something rather personal?”

“You can ask, depending on what it is I’ll answer honestly or tell you I’d rather not answer it.”

“Fair enough.” He hesitated for a minute or two, then asked, “Are you still in love with that guy, the married one?”

“We already discussed that,” I said.

“No, we discussed if you missed him. I asked if you still loved him.”

I didn’t say anything for a moment, then shook my head. “No.I don’t think that I ever really loved him. I think I was in love with the idea of being in love, with being loved. I never really felt loved in my life—ever. I was naive.”

“Were you with him for a long time?”

“Off and on for about five years.” I watched as the turtle in the water caught a little fish to eat. “Probably more off than on.”

“You didn’t date anyone else that whole time? You just sat around while he was at home with his wife and kids?”

I shook my head. “He was my first and only boyfriend I’ve ever had. I always waited for him to call. Sooner or later he always did.”

Jacob stood up, walking along the edge of the pond until he was almost to the other side. I couldn’t make out what he was thinking, he wouldn’t look at me. When he finally did, the look was one I hadn’t seen to this point, not clearly disgust but close. I got the picture. Standing up, I started packing up the lunch things.

“What are you doing?” Jacob asked, walking back toward me.

I looked at him, “Look, Jacob, I understand. You can take me home now. I get it.”

He looked confused, “Get what?”

“That you regret today, are sorry that you are wasting time on me,” I said.

“What are you talking about? I don’t regret anything.”

“You don’t?”

“No, why would I?” he exclaimed.

“I’m pregnant with another man’s baby, who turned out to be cheating with me. I let him use me for almost five years. I’m not exactly a great catch. You can take me home. We can be friends. I won’t hold it against you.”

“Stop, Mia. Please, sit down.” He took my hand, pulling me down on the blanket next to him. “I don’t regret meeting you or spending time with you. I am upset that some pig used you like that and took advantage of you. For some reason, I am drawn to you. I want to protect you. I know we just met. I really want us to spend more time together.” I looked at him, he was so sincere that I was finding it hard not to believe him.

“You do? Why would you want to spend time with a woman pregnant with another man’s baby?” I asked. “Seriously Jacob, I come with a lot of baggage that you don’t need in your life.”

He thought for a minute before answering, looking at my hand as he stroked my fingers. “My last relationship was with a woman that I thought I was in love with. I imagined spending the rest of my life with her. She lived in the city; we were about as different as two people could be. There were all sorts of signs there, she always came to my place, claiming it was nice to get out of the city.”

“One day, I was driving to the city on business when I saw her. She was with another man. I followed them into a restaurant where I confronted them. That man turned out to be her husband, the father of their child. I ended up breaking up their marriage. He wouldn’t forgive her for cheating.” He looked away.

“What did she do?” I asked.

“She tried to contact me, saying she was never in love with him, and wanted to make things work for us, but I couldn’t trust her. It was much easier letting go of her than I thought it would be had I really been in love with her.”

“I’m sorry Jacob,” I said softly. “It still had to hurt.”

“Hurt my pride,” he said smiling. “See, I had been taken in by someone too. My point is almost everybody has baggage. What I feel for you is different.”

“Different how?”

Again, he was quiet for a few moments before he answered. “The moment I saw you with Lucky sleeping in your arms, on the path I just knew. Mia Amata, I love you. I have never felt this way before—ever. When we are apart, I feel like I can’t breathe. When I am with you—I am so happy, I want to be with you every moment I can. As far as the baby, he… ”

I interrupted, “She.”

“Oh, is it a girl?”

I smiled, “It hasn’t been proven by ultrasound yet, I just know that the baby is a girl.”

He smiled back. “OK, then. That baby girl is a part of you. If you allow me to, I know I can love her too.”

I sat there in silence again, taking in everything he said. If he was lying to me, he was really good at it. I was still confused, but there was something in me that was telling me I wanted this man in my life.

“Mia Amata?” I looked at him. “Will you let me be a part of your life, and your baby’s life?”

“I think I would like that,” I replied, “but you have to be patient with me Jacob. Having been recently hurt, trust and love may not come as easily for me as they seem to have for you.”

“We can take things as slow as you need,” He leaned over, kissing me so tenderly and gently. When the kiss ended, he moved around, sat behind me, and took me into his arms. I leaned back against him. We sat like that talking about ourselves, getting to know each other.

Eventually, he shifted positions, pulling me into his lap. He pulled me tighter to him. I snuggled up to him, feeling warm and safe, for the first time in years. I nuzzled my face into his neck, reaching up to put my arm around his neck. After a little while, he lay me down on the blanket and pulled back a little and then started to kiss me.

Pulling his head back, he looked at me, his eyes partially closed. He stroked my face, kissed me again, then lay his head down beside me. I curled up to him. I could hear his heartbeat, and it seemed to be pounding really hard, just like mine.

I must have dozed off for a little bit in the warmth of his arms. “Mia,” he said gently rubbing my arm. Opening my eyes, “Yes?” I asked sleepily.

“It’s getting late, we should go.”

Rolling onto my back, I looked up at him. “Do we have to?”

He laughed, kissed me, and then sat up. “Yes, we do.”

I groaned, sitting up too. We packed up our picnic things, heading back down the path by the stream to the boat. By the time we made it back to his truck, it was 5:00. He took me around to the passenger side, opening and shutting the door for me. I buckled up as he slid behind the steering wheel. When we started to move, his hand found mine. We talked about the coming week and our jobs. He asked when he could see me again.

“When will you have time?” I asked.

“Tomorrow night,” he said, smiling. “If that is OK.”

“I think that would be OK,” I said. “I’ll make you supper.”

“You don’t need to go to a lot of trouble for me.”

“It would be my pleasure. You know, it is early yet,” I said, as we pulled up to my house. “Do you want to come in? I can make us some sandwiches or leftover lasagna.”

He shut the truck off, “Now that’s a deal. Your homemade lasagna is fantastic. Don’t tell Sal, but I think it is probably better than his.” I laughed as we entered the house with Lucky greeting us inside the door. “Hey, boy,” I said. I looked at Jacob. “I need to take Lucky out, then I will get the lasagna warmed up for us.”

“I’ll join you outside. I’m not in a hurry to eat.” We went outside with Lucky. I walked to the deck rail, watching as Lucky chased a squirrel. Jacob came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. I leaned back against him. This felt nice, but I still had an inner argument about if this was the right thing to do. Lucky soon tired of chasing the squirrel, took care of his business, and then came running back up the steps to us. The three of us went back into the house.

“Make yourself at home,” I told Jacob. “I’ll be right back.” I used the bathroom, washing up some before I started cooking. Walking into the kitchen I started the oven. “Turn on the TV if you want.”

“I’d rather sit here and talk to you,” he said, as he sat on one of the stools at the counter.

I smiled at him. Pulling the lasagna out of the refrigerator, I set it on the counter to warm it a little before sticking it in the oven. I prepared a couple pieces of fresh garlic bread. I put both the lasagna and bread in the oven to heat them up, then pulled the fixings out for a little salad.

“Is there something I can do?” he asked.

“I have this under control, but you could set the table if you don’t mind…”

“Sure.” He slid off the stool, finding the things easily enough. We worked together quietly, chatting about nothing and everything. It seemed more relaxed, easy, not pressured or stressed than before. Soon, we were sitting down at the table, eating and chatting about the day. He told me stories of staying in the cabin at the lake when he was younger and all the fun they used to have there. We laughed at some of the trouble he and his two siblings used to get into.

“I envy you. You have some great memories of your childhood. Ones you will cherish forever.” I smiled at him.

“I do,” he replied. “I wish you did. Do you have any happy memories from your childhood?”

“Not really,” I said. “I moved from foster home to foster home, never really staying very long in one place, so it made it hard to develop friendships. One foster home though, the lady that ran it introduced me to books. Thanks to her I developed a love of reading. Other than that, there were not a lot of happy moments.”

“I’m so sorry,” he said. “How did you come out with such a great attitude? A lot of people that have gone through half of what you have such a negative attitude toward life.”

We had finished eating, I stood up to clear off the table. He stood up, helping me. Together we loaded the dishwasher, cleaning everything up. I offered him a glass of tea, took one myself. We went to sit down on the couch, automatically sitting on the small couch. “So you never answered my question,” he said, smiling.

“What? Oh, yes, my attitude.” I smiled. “I guess I do have one good memory, something that probably has a lot to do with my attitude. I ran away from the last foster home at the age of 16, as I told you before. I left with a backpack with a few clothes, a couple books, and what little cash I managed to save from babysitting.”

I took a sip of tea, setting the glass down on the coffee table. “I traveled by foot for a few days, hiding when I saw police. The last thing I wanted was to go back to another foster home. I ate what I could find. Sometimes, I’d go into stores to buy something, but I was trying to budget my money very carefully. One day, I was walking when it started raining.”

“I had no shelter, jacket. I just kept walking until it was dark out. I came across a farm on the outskirts of a small town. I snuck up to the barn, found a way in, curled up in the hay, and fell asleep. I figured I would get up after a couple of hours of rest, leaving before anyone could find me there. I felt horrible by the time I got there, feverish, and chilled. I woke up two days later.”

“Two days?” Jacob asked .

I nodded. “I was no longer in the barn. I woke up in a bed in the farmhouse. The farmer discovered me the next morning. He and his wife managed to me in the house. She took care of me, getting me out of my wet things, tucking me in the bed, and then nursing me back to health.”

“They were very kind to me, decent people. They let me stay there until I was well and then invited me to stay there with them full-time, offering me room and board and a little money for helping them on the farm. I told them my story. The farmer’s wife cried. I stayed with them and helped them on the farm, taking care of all the animals they had. Probably one of the happiest times of my life.”

“What happened? Why did you leave?” Jacob asked, reaching out to stroke my hair.

I frowned, “The couple ended up having some bad luck strike them. The economy went bad, they were losing money on their farm. They ended up selling their animals and most of their equipment. The man suffered a stroke, dying shortly afterward. Their son showed up and moved his mother to live with him.”

“I found myself homeless again. He made it clear that he didn’t want me anywhere near his mom and thought I was a freeloader no matter how much his mother protested. I packed what little I had into my backpack, hitting the road again. They taught me a lot about how decent people can be and how to respect others.”

“They helped me overcome the bitterness that I had from my past. Taught me that if I let my past affect me on a daily basis, then the past wins. I had to choose not to let the past dictate my future. I guess they had a lot more influence on me than I thought they did.”

Jacob put his glass on the table next to mine. “What did you do next?” he asked.

“I traveled around, doing odd jobs here and there. Discovered that most people are essentially kind and generous, like the farming couple. I finally found a town and a job that I really liked. Soon, I was able to get a small apartment and started to make a life for myself. I was there until I started over again here.”

“Makes the things that happened to me in my life, that I considered awful, seem so… insignificant,” Jacob said.

“Don’t minimalize the things that happened to you.” I smiled at him. “I really believe those things help make us who we are today.”

Jacob leaned over and kissed me tenderly. “I am glad you are here now. I hope I can help make some good memories for you.” He said quietly as he leaned in, kissing me some more. The kisses started to become more passionate until I finally pulled away.

“I should go.” He said breathlessly. I nodded. We stood up and walked to the front door with our arms wrapped around each other.

He turned toward me, took me in his arms, looking me in the eyes. “I had a great time today.”

“I did too.”

“See you tomorrow night?” he asked.

“Yes.” He bent down, kissing me gently. He pulled back, “Night Mia Amata, I love you.”

“Night Jacob.” I watched him walk out to his truck and then shut the door.