Chapter 44 #2
“But,” she continues, cracking her knuckles, and rolling her shoulders like she’s just getting warmed up. “You could use some work.”
She explodes forward, and I move, but she’s already there. A first slams into my chin, snapping my head to the side, and I can instantly taste blood in my mouth. Pain lances through me as she twists, driving her knee into my stomach.
Ow.
The impact knocks the air out of my lungs, and I hit the ground hard. Stars flash behind my eyes, and I can feel the cold dirt grinding into my spine. Then she drops, pinning me in a heartbeat. Her forearm crushes my throat just enough to remind me she could end this whenever she wanted to.
Her grin is still there, but it’s calculated.
“This,” she breathes, barely winded, “is why you need training.”
I glare up at her, sucking in air between gritted teeth. My whole body aches, but I don’t break eye contact. I’m not sure if we’re going to call it a day, but I’m sure as hell not going to be the one to tap out.
She studies me for a beat longer, and just like that, she’s off of me.
I roll onto my side, coughing, trying to push myself upright. Somewhere off in the distance I can hear Cam. The asshole is laughing like he definitely enjoyed that.
Elle extends a hand, and after a second, I take it.
“You did good,” she smiles. “But you hesitate a lot.”
I scowl, rubbing my jaw. Well, of course I do. It's been years since I've done anything useful. I'm about as threatening as a wet noodle right now. Tomorrow should be fun…
Elle laughs, tossing an arm around my shoulder like she didn’t just steamroll me into the dirt. “Tomorrow? Same time?”
I swallow hard, resisting the urge to ask if she was reading my thoughts. I trust her, at least, I think I do. Cam says I should, but the way she looks at me makes me feel stripped down to the bone and exposed.
She’s right. I have been holding back. Not just with this, but with everything. I'm always in control, or trying to be. I hold it in, because God knows what disaster I'd cause if I actually let go.
But now I'm starting to wonder if holding back is what’s going to get me killed.
“And no, I don’t need to read your mind to know that,” Elle adds, laughing. “It’s obvious in the way you move.”
I arch a brow, turning to face Cam, who looks like he's seen a ghost. “You good over there?”
“He’s just surprised.” She teases, sidestepping Cam as he throws her an annoyed glare. “Which, by the way, is extremely hard to accomplish. He didn’t think you could do any of that. He thought you were just a pretty face.”
Cam’s head snaps toward her, eyes narrowing with warning, and I can tell he's saying something I can't hear. “Elle.” His tone is lethal. “Get. Out. Of. My. Head.”
“You let your walls down.” She grins, flipping him off. “That’s on you.”
I cross my arms, giving Cam my best smile. “A pretty face, huh?”
His jaw twitches, but his expression doesn't budge. I can't read him, except for that split second when something dark flickers in his eyes. But it's gone as fast as it came.
“That’s not exactly what I was thinking.” He exhales, rolling his shoulders. “But I’ll admit it, I am impressed. Not many people can go against Elle and walk away on their own.”
There’s a reluctant admiration in his tone and I'm not sure what that’s about, but I don’t have the capacity to care right now. I just wish I could take a relaxing bath.
“Do you read people’s minds during a fight?” I blurt. I’m not even going to pretend I’m not dying to know the answer to that.
She smiles, tossing her hair over her shoulder like she’s in a damn hair commercial.
“Not exactly,” she says with a wink. “Well, yes and no.” She shifts on her feet, looking at Cam, who nods.
“In a real fight? Absa-fucking-lutely I’ll use it.
Survival over fairness, always. But training?
Nah. That’s boring.” She smiles. “I love proving I can win without it. It's so much more satisfying that way.”
I nod, still reeling from the casual yeah I could’ve read your thoughts, but I didn’t.
“But don’t worry, I didn’t peek inside your head during our little scuffle. I wanted to see what you could do without the advantage. And you, my dear, are dangerously underestimated.”
Cam groans, dragging a hand down his face. “Elle, could you not inflate her ego any more than it already is?”
I grin, completely unfazed. “Oh you mean, the ego that goes with my pretty face?”
Elle cackles and Cam exhales slowly. He levels Elle with a look. “To answer the question I know you're going to ask, people don’t beat Elle, because she’s one of our Commanding Officers.” There's a flicker of pride in his tone. “And she’s nearly impossible to beat.”
My head snaps to Elle and my stomach flips. “Wait, WHAT?”
She nods, entirely unbothered. “Looks like I might have to train with you more often, since everyone else is too afraid to get hurt.”
Then, like she didn’t just casually ruin my day, she winks at me again. “Anyway, good game. Raincheck for our night out. Trust me, you’ll thank me later. Take a bath and use the hazy lavender bottle.”
Then she turns and bounces down the path.
Cam exhales, shaking his head. “You did good, Rae.”
Rae? The nickname sends a flicker of warmth through my chest, curling around something fragile. A tingle rushes down my spine, and I swallow hard, blinking rapidly to push back the sudden swell of emotion.
I shift my gaze to the horizon, where the sun is dipping below the hills.
Never in a million years did I picture my life turning out like this.
Coming to Scotland, meeting these people, feeling this strange, undeniable pull toward a world I never knew existed.
And the wildest part is… I don’t want to leave.
For whatever reason, being here feels right.
I inhale deeply, forcing my voice into something lighter. “So when do I get to kick your ass?”
Cam chuckles, shaking his head. “Let’s save that for another day.” He picks up my sweater, handing it to me. “If you’re up for it, we could try something different before dinner. Maybe a little magic?”
“Yes!” I blurt, suddenly forgetting how much my body hurts. Turns out all it takes is the word magic to rearrange my priorities.
“Let’s go, dork.”
We’ve been sitting in his office for the last hour, and nothing's happened.
I take a deep breath, resisting the urge to bang my head against the desk. First, we meditated. Which I thought was interesting. Then, Cam led me through some simple exercises. And still, nothing. No tingling hands. No sparks of power. No inexplicable holy shit moments.
Just… nothing.
And I hate that I’m this disappointed.
I was starting to warm up to the idea that maybe all of this was real. That maybe I was something more than I thought, and maybe I belonged here. I hoped this would give me the answer I needed about what’s been happening to me, but it didn't give me anything.
Cam did say I couldn’t have found this place if I didn’t have magic. So where the hell is it?
“Rae.”
Cam’s voice cuts through my thoughts, sharp enough to startle me.
I shake it off, looking over at him. “What? Sorry, I was just… thinking.”
His eyes narrow slightly, but his voice stays even. “It’s in there, don’t worry, I can feel it.”
I want to believe him. But right now, his reassurance doesn’t do much to untangle the frustration knotting in my chest. Wait…feel it?
“You can feel it?”
“If I hadn’t been so shocked to see you in the woods, I would’ve picked up on it then.
” His brows pull together slightly, like he’s piecing it together in real-time.
“But when you were sleeping, and the storms were happening, I felt it again. I could smell it. I knew it was yours. So yeah, it’s in there. ”
My stomach flips and a sharp, uneasy prickle runs down my spine.
My hand clamps down on his arm without warning as shock sparks through me. “Smell me?”
Cam frowns, looking at my hand on his arm, clearly confused by my reaction. Meanwhile, I can barely breathe.
The memory slams into me so fast. “I can smell you.” My heart stumbles, and my pulse spikes while I replay the night of the attack on the street. The lights shattering. His scream. All of it coming back in vivid detail.
Cam's eyes widen. “He said he could smell you?” His tone turns razor-sharp, and all his casual amusement is gone. “Why the fuck didn’t that come up before?”
The sharpness in his tone makes me flinch, and I can feel the heat crawling up my neck. Okaaay. Cam's never been mad at me before, and wow—turns out I'm not a fan. “Wait, I thought you said you couldn’t read minds?”
I'm on my feet before I realize it, and that buzz spreads in my fingertips again. Great. Exactly what I need—more paranoia about someone digging around in my head. And for the first time since being here, I wonder if he's lying to me.
His frown twists into a grin and he looks smug as hell. “I can smell you right now.”
I recoil. “That’s… ew. Wait, what the fuck do you mean?”
“It means,” Cam leans back, enjoying my confusion. “ … you did it!”
“I did what?”
He laughs, looking shocked, and it's starting to piss me off. “I think you just showed me.” He gestures between us. “I have no clue how you managed to do that, I’m not even sure you meant to…”
He trails off, and I can hear his voice fill with excitement. I don't know why, I didn’t do anything. And what the hell does he mean showed him. How?
Fuck. My head hurts.
“That’s extremely rare, by the way. Not many people can do that. Interesting.”
I barely hear him over how fast my mind is spinning. And then, I feel it. There's a strange, intense pull that flares in my chest, spreading like wildfire. It spreads through my arms, and I can feel it in my whole body.
Cam notices instantly. His grin fades leaving that all-business look I've been seeing a lot lately.
“Talk to me, what’s happening?”
“My whole body feels…” I hesitate, searching for the right words and also not knowing how much to share. “Tingly. And my hands are sweaty. Umm…I feel this pressure in my chest.” I glance down at my hands, half-expecting them to be glowing.
He freezes and his entire demeanor shifts. His voice dips darker and just like that, I feel like I'm the one about to get grounded. “Let’s back up for just a second. What exactly did he say? Start to finish.”
I blink, thrown off by the question. I'm assuming he means the man who told me I smelled bad.
“Uh, he said…” The memory jams up in my throat, sharp and sour. “He could smell me. Called me reckless. He sounded… disgusted, which was rude.” My pulse thrums in my ears while I try to think. “And that I was exactly who he was looking for.”
Cam doesn’t move. He just stares at me and the silence feels like needles under my skin. Then he's on his feet and his chair screeches back, slamming into the desk hard enough to shake it.
I can already tell that whatever comes out of his mouth next won't be good. And when he finally does speak, it’s calm, and his mask is locked right back in place.
“And you didn’t think to mention this sooner?” His tone isn’t outright accusing, but the edge in it slices right through me.
I wince, crossing my arms over my chest. “I didn’t know it was important,” I snap, defensively. “I just thought he was a creep who had me confused with someone else.”
Cam exhales slowly, pinching his nose. “That explains a lot, actually.” His voice drops lower, talking more to himself now. “Explains why he said he could smell you. If your magic’s spilling, that’s what he was picking up on.”
His jaw tightens. “And if you’re radiating like that…” He trails off, muttering a quiet, “Shit.”
A pit forms in my stomach. “What does that mean?”
Cam's shoulders tense, and when he looks at me again, there’s a crack in his expression. And it looks a lot like worry. “It means,” he sighs, “you’ve been using magic for longer than just today. And you’ve been lighting yourself up like a Christmas tree to anyone who knows what to look for.”
I open my mouth, then shut it again. Because what the hell am I even supposed to say to that?
The heat flares in my hands, so suddenly, that I suck in a breath. A tingling sensation rolls under my skin, snaking through my fingertips like electricity searching for an exit.
The air around me changes enough to make me notice. That never means anything good.
My pulse spikes and I look at Cam, waiting for some kind of manual, but he's staring out the window as a low rumble rolls in from the distance.
I swallow hard, and I can feel my throat tighten.
“What do I do?” My voice is too high. I can feel the panic licking at the edges of my control as the tingling spreads. My hands are on fire now, and it feels like I’m holding something that’s desperate to escape.
Cam starts to laugh. Actually laugh.
I glare at him, not seeing how any of this is remotely funny, because I feel like I'm about to freak out.
“Close your eyes.” His voice is annoyingly calm and right now, the only thing I can focus on is wanting to punch him. “Focus on your breathing. On everything we just practiced. You’ve got this.”
I try. I really do, but it's too much.
My nose stings sharp enough to make me inhale fast. I wipe at it, and sure enough—blood. Perfect. Just what I needed right now.
My vision sways and I can tell that he's saying something because his lips are moving, but I can’t hear him.
The buzzing in my skull spikes into a roar, drowning everything out—then the windows explode. Glass showers the room and papers whip through the room in the rush of air.
A strange, unnatural calm settles over me, and it feels wrong in a way I can’t explain. It creeps into my limbs, curling through my veins like fog, and it's thick and suffocating. I feel like I can't breathe.
My body sways as the last shred of my energy drains from me because I know this feeling. It's Cam. I can feel the weight of exhaustion pulling me under.
Cam’s voice is the only thing that cuts through the void. It’s soft, and steady, anchoring me in the chaos.
“I got you, Rae.”