Chapter 1 #2
Even if they are technically our subjects, the Wilder Fae are much like the cold and the snow.
A fact of the world, but mostly beyond our control.
Strange-looking fae trudge through snowdrifts in patched cloaks, rough hands bare and red from the chill, their pale skin almost ashy in the dim light.
Several sets of eyes follow the carriage with hard expressions.
I lift my chin and focus inward, because Beron is my primary concern right now.
Wild Ones crowding around the capital’s walls are a problem for another time.
As long as they’re not causing unrest, the rest of us can carry on with our lives, as we always have.
The palace expects any working inside the walls to stay invisible, so I rarely see them.
Whatever childhood curiosity I may have harbored was long ago stamped out.
A flash of scarlet catches my eye despite myself. A boy, no older than seven or eight, watches us pass from in front of a ramshackle shelter. He clutches a threadbare red coat tight around him, his lips faintly blue against too-pale skin. His expression needles at something in my chest.
I hope he doesn’t live there. That encampment is not just an eyesore; it doesn’t look like it could possibly protect from the cold either.
I’m about to ask Beron why these folk are here, when I remember that he’s already lying to me, and I’m not exactly in his good graces at the moment. Instead, I draw the lacy curtain before I can dwell on what I saw.
Soon, the Wilder Fae vanish behind us.
Our carriage runners shudder over icy ruts as the city recedes. Trees close in, dense and dark, looming like silent witnesses as we plunge deeper into wild territory. I might be lulled by the hush, if not for Beron’s stiff form across from me.
It’s not just the woods that are dangerous.
Finally, I break the silence. “If we’re really headed to the summer palace, why this carriage? And why your men instead of a proper entourage?”
“It’s not your place to question your queen’s orders, princess.”
I scoff. Queen Taynia’s orders can never be questioned, especially by her own stepdaughter. Nothing she does should surprise me anymore, but as I take in Beron’s grim face, the way he avoids my gaze, cold realization sinks in.
Suddenly, the huntsmen make perfect sense.
“She ordered you to get rid of me, didn’t she?”
His silence is damning.
“She did! Drowning Deep, is she serious?”
When he finally speaks, his voice is low, almost regretful. “She doesn’t mean it, Talvie. She’s just…lost.”
“You mean she’s a bitter menace, angry and sour ever since Is? died.
Like it’s my fault. Like I didn’t lose him too?
We’re all miserable enough with this endless winter…
All I ever wanted from her was comfort. Togetherness.
Shared grief! But no, I’m the problem. It’s all cold rules and colder looks for Talvie.
By the Deep, I knew she hated me, but this… ?”
Silence.
No denial.
“Banishment, then? Or did she actually—” My voice catches on words too absurd to say, yet there they are, dark and looming. They come out in a hoarse whisper. “Did she order you to kill me?”
“She doesn’t hate you,” he sighs. “You remind her of him. She misses him terribly.”
So quick to forgive. So eager to find excuses.
Well, I’m not.
I cross my arms. “Careful, Beron. Your crush is showing.”
“Mind your tongue, princess,” he snaps, his gaze hard.
The weight of betrayal is a stone in my chest. He failed to answer my question.
“Where are you really taking me? Into the Frozen Forest, where no one will hear me scream?” I lean in.
“You’ll hear me, Beron. You. Are you so ready to kill me just to please her?
Aren’t you still loyal to my father? Or to the child you trained, whom you taught to wield ice magic?
Is that all erased because you’re blinded by your feelings for the Ice Queen? ”
“Enough, Talvie. It will be best if you just go along with this.”
A manic laugh bubbles up. “Best for whom? It’ll be my neck beneath your axe, Beron. Does that mean nothing to you? What of your legendary loyalty?”
“Maybe I’m not as loyal as you thought.” His broad chest rises with tight, angry breaths.
“Oh, please. You were so loyal to my father, you buried your own desires. You knew Taynia first, but as soon as my father showed interest, you locked your feelings down so tight you nearly had me fooled all these years.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Lie.”
“Stop that.”
“Or what? You’ll kill me?”
“If you keep asking foolish questions, yes.” This time, his ears remain level.
So that’s it, then. My life for Taynia’s twisted grief.
Like that, my own grief crashes into me like a gale. I’m so used to stuffing it down into that numb cavern that when it breaks loose, I drown in the blizzard.
Even now, after everything, it hurts.
Not just my father’s death, but the way Taynia changed.
I thought I’d turned it off—that part of me that wants to please her, to laugh with her again.
But knowing she’s gone this far, there’s a finality…
I don’t know what will hurt more: this, or the fall of the axe.