Chapter 1
“This sounds highly irregular,” the secretary’s voice on the other side of the line said skeptically.
“I don’t know what to tell you, ma’am. That’s how it works. I’m no more excited to do my job than you are. The sooner we can get this done, the sooner we can move on.”
“Well, I understand that, Miss Auble.”
“Agent,” I corrected.
“Sorry, yes. Of course… I understand that, Agent Auble. But Sunshine Sanctuary facilities operate under very strict visitation protocols to protect our trade secrets and the peace of our animals. Even for an inspection, we require an advance notice of fourteen days.”
“This is a surprise inspection. As you can guess, advance warning would defeat the purpose. I feel like I’m already being accommodating by not demanding to be let in right now,” I said, before calming my frustration.
I continued with a tone of renewed purpose, “If you’d rather decline the inspection, you are within your rights to do so.
However, that will count as an automatic failure and you’ll need to shut down activities in the facility and reapply for your Food Facility Registration, Pasteurization Permit, and Dairy Plant licenses before you can resume production. ”
There was silence on the other end of the line for a solid three seconds before the secretary answered. “Give me a moment, M- Agent Auble.”
And the waiting music began. I started losing hope, figuring she was trying to figure out a quick way to verify if the FDA credentials I had provided her were legit.
They weren’t, of course. I wasn’t an FDA agent.
I was part of the Children of Gaia non-governmental organization, and Sunshine Sanctuary had been in our sights for a while.
Their allegedly cruelty-free, all-organic milk had been a success since it hit the markets a few months before, but the company running it was closed tighter than a nun’s legs; nobody seemed to know anything about their production chain.
The most we were able to do was to track down some distribution routes to their main production center, which combined a farm and a dairy plant.
While the government didn’t seem very interested in doing any oversight, the Children of Gaia suspected that the ‘cruelty-free’ part of their label wasn’t true.
If we could get video proof from inside the facility of animals being kept in poor conditions, then we could throw those videos all over the internet and take down the company.
The only thing worse than a company abusing animals for profit was a company doing it while claiming that they weren’t.
If Sunshine Sanctuary had nothing to hide, why did all of their employees have such strict NDAs?
Why weren’t non-employees allowed to go into their facilities?
Why did they build such tall, opaque metal fences around their compound?
We all knew something there stunk, we just needed details and proof.
“Hello, agent?” The other woman’s voice came back to the line.
“Yes, I’m here,” I replied, startled out of my thoughts.
“We can fit in your inspection tomorrow at five. Someone will guide you through the facility.”
“Well, I expected to be seen today,” I said, honestly.
It was still early in the afternoon and, in theory, I was calling this was supposed to be immediate.
“I understand, but in order to allow you access to every part of the facility, we will need to ensure there’s spare, clean safety equipment. I’m sure a Federal Agent understands we can’t let someone visit an industrial plant without proper safety gear.”
Had she said, ‘every part of the facility?’ I couldn’t believe my ears. That was better than what I had hoped for. Having to wait a little longer for such a chance was worth it.
“Yes, of course,” I said evenly.
“So, we will use the time to secure all the additional materials. That leaves us the option of tomorrow at five?”
“Tomorrow at five, yes. I can do that,” I said.
“Thank you for your understanding, Agent Auble. Sunshine Sanctuary appreciates it.”
“Of course, that’s no pro-”
She hung up on me. I didn’t have time to get mad.
I jumped up and down in joy. I felt the weight of my large breasts bouncing uncomfortably.
I was wearing a tight sundress without a bra, lounging in the comfort of my home.
Why shouldn’t I celebrate my victory? But as soon as I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I stopped and frowned.
I looked at my reflection. My vitiligo spots were visible across my arms, my cleavage and my neck.
The width of my very wide hips, thick thighs and pudgy stomach were also very obvious, pushing against the black and white striped dress.
I should have loved my body the way it was, but whenever I looked at myself in the mirror, all I could do was remember all the awful names that I had been called due to my weight or my skin condition.
Not to mention the few failed attempts at romance I had before giving up on that altogether.
It was a shame, too, because I felt like I had a beautiful face.
My quick foray into dating websites taught me that any picture I cropped below the neck tended to attract a lot of attention.
As soon as the same men who were eager to meet saw me in person, most of them would just walk backwards out of the door without saying a word.
That became too painful to deal with quickly.
I had set my sights on a higher cause than getting laid. And I’d just scored a big win.
My insecurities could wait. This was more important.
I called Jason to share the news. His phone only rang twice before he picked it up.
“Guess who got in?” I said, not even bothering with our usual small talk.
“Got into what?” he asked, “What are you talking about, Tiff?”
“I’m talking about Sunshine Sanctuary. I got in!”
“Shut the front door!”
“Well, hopefully, they’ll open it!”
He laughed out loud. Jason was the only one that made me feel remotely good about myself.
Well, he and Wren, before she vanished from the face of the Earth.
I even stopped going to the grocery store her family owned after she was gone.
I felt bad for it, but Wren was the whole reason I went.
If I was going to get glared at anyway, I would rather go to the local superstore.
“How did you swing that?” He asked.
“A really scary e-mail, a fake FDA badge and a lot of bluffing,” I answered.
“Wait, are you impersonating a Federal Agent? That’s a crime, Tiff. A federal crime.”
“It’ll be fine. It’s just for the tour. I’ll get the pictures I need, give them a false passing grade, and vanish from the map,” I plotted. “Then we’ll take those bastards down.”
“Just be careful, okay?”
“Oh, of course, Jason. Just relax. I’m not infiltrating a Scientology compound,” I laughed but sensed that he would need more than that, so I added, a tad bit more serious, “I’ll just go in, get what we need, and get out, okay? I promise I won’t take any unnecessary risks.”
“Okay, okay. Gosh, I can’t believe you got in. That’s amazing.”
“I know!”
“Sunshine Sanctuary!”
“I know!” I repeated excitedly.
“When are you going?” He asked.
“Tomorrow.”
“That’s not a lot of time.”
“It’s not. But if they have time, they’ll hide whatever they are doing wrong. We gotta surprise them, so they make mistakes,” I said.
“That’s fair. I guess we need to come up with a plan of action soon. Let me take you out for drinks so we can discuss it.”
I felt myself tensing for a moment. That offer sounded a lot like a date. Except, of course, a hot guy like Jason would never date a fat pig like me, I told myself. I had nothing to be nervous about. In his eyes, I probably had the same sex appeal as the dumpster behind the local Applebee’s.
“Alright,” I said. “Not too many drinks, though. I need to be sharp tomorrow.”
“Not too many,” he vowed. “You are amazing, Tiff!”
And with that, we hung up. I closed my eyes and sighed.
No, you are amazing, Jason, I thought to myself hopelessly. Then I focused on the goal and only the goal of dismantling the Sunshine Sanctuary. Self-pity wasn’t going to help me save those animals.