Chapter 28 Khloe #2
“Our families were close growing up, but our homes were different. Kairo had siblings… noise… support… people always around. I loved that about his family.”
“I’m an only child. It was always just me. My parents gave me everything materially. I never lacked anything… but sometimes I wished they were on me like a hawk. I wanted them to worry about me, question me, and show me they were emotionally invested.”
I looked down at my hands. “When I told my parents I was pregnant… My dad was supportive immediately. But my mom…”
The hurt still lived there. “She was devastated. She acted like I had ruined everything and embarrassed our family. It was like I had destroyed this image she built of having the perfect daughter.”
Tears blurred my vision. “I had spent my entire life trying to please her,” I whispered. “And the moment I needed grace and support… she gave me judgment.”
Kairo sat frozen beside me.
“She told me I made reckless decisions because I knew my dad would financially save me. She made me feel like I got pregnant because I believed someone would always catch me if I fell. So that day… I made a promise to myself.I told myself I would never need them again. I decided I would hustle, sacrifice, suffer — whatever it took — before I ever asked either of our parents for help. And I meant that.”
Kairo stared at me like he was seeing a version of me he had never known existed. “You never told me that,” he said.
I shook my head. “I didn’t want you looking at my parents differently. I didn’t want you to think less of them… or feel like you had to compensate for something they lacked. And then you had already promised to make sure we were straight.”
I turned toward him fully. “So, I believed you and held on to that. I stopped asking for help from anyone… because I told myself I already had my person. And when you got busy building our life,” I whispered, “I didn’t know how to ask for emotional support without feeling weak… or abandoned all over again.”
Sydnee nodded, watching the moment unfold.
Kairo cleared his throat. “So…” he said slowly, lifting his head toward me, “…is that why you always pushed me to work? To build something even outside of my dad and my family’s real estate business?”
“Yes.”
He nodded once, then shook his head like something painful finally made sense.
“In the beginning, I hated working that much. I missed you and Kennedi. I hated walking out the house knowing y’all were inside without me all day. But it felt like you were pushing me out the door.”
“You’d talk about things you wanted,” he continued. “Not in a spoiled way… just dreams. A better apartment, a certain lifestyle, and stability. Every time I thought about going to my parents for help, it turned into an argument.”
“I knew my parents could’ve gotten us whatever luxury apartment you wanted,” he said. “Hell, they would’ve done it happily. But every time I mentioned it, you’d shut down… or get upset… or make it clear you didn’t want that.”
I stared at my hands.
“And I didn’t want you feeling like I couldn’t provide. So, I worked harder. I already grew up watching my dad’s grind nonstop. It was already in me. But the more you pushed… the more I leaned into it.”
His eyes met mine. “And eventually… it stopped feeling temporary and became my identity. I’ll never forget…
” He rubbed a hand down his face. “When I sold my first home for over a million dollars. I was so excited to come home and tell you. I was proud as hell because I did it without my dad, grandpa, or anyone pulling strings.”
“I walked through that door feeling like I finally did it. Like I was becoming the man you believed I could be.”
My stomach dropped before he even finished.
“And when I told you… You said congratulations… and then asked, ‘What’s next?’”
My eyes filled instantly because I remembered saying it. I remembered thinking I was motivating him. I never realized I was wounding him.
Kairo swallowed. “That was the first time I felt like I wasn’t enough for you.”
Tears slid down my cheeks.
“Like I hit a milestone… and it still didn’t meet your standards. So I stopped looking for celebrations at home.”
“I’d rather be at work,” he admitted. “Clients cheered for me. My colleagues respected me. People congratulated me for things I accomplished.”
He shrugged. “Out there… I felt appreciated. I worked harder so you’d never have to worry about money. You could swipe whatever card you wanted. Buy whatever you wanted. I never complained.”
“But the more I worked,” he said, trying not to get emotional. “The more exhausted I became. The bills were paid. We had overflow money like you wanted. The lifestyle was there….. And then the arguments started.”
“You wanted more time and I didn’t understand how I could give more time when everything I was doing… I thought you loved.”
“This,” Sydnee said gently, “is one of the most painful marital misalignments. You were both loving each other through your own wounds.”
Sydnee wrote something on her notepad before she turned toward me.
“Khloe,” she said, resting the pen against her notebook, “when did the arguments actually begin?”
“They started… when we finally made it.”
Both of them looked at me.
“When our dream home was built. When I was fully established in my career. When our finances stopped being stressful and life finally felt stable. It had taken years, and I thought we had reached the finish line. I thought that once everything settled… I could finally have my husband back.”
My voice cracked. “I wanted spontaneous dates, random trips, late nights talking. I wanted us to rediscover each other without the stress hanging over our heads.”
I started crying hard. “I even wanted another baby. I felt ready again. Kennedi was older. My career was stable. The house was done. I finally felt like I could breathe.”
Tears filled my eyes. “But every time I brought it up… you were against it.”
“Life became easier financially,” I said, “but emotionally… nothing changed for me.I was still running a household, raising our child, and managing my career. I was overwhelmed… but I kept telling myself this was the life I asked for. So at the end of every day… the only thing I wanted was to be under my husband.”
“It hurt when you came home late,” I admitted. “It hurt when date nights got canceled. When trips got postponed. When work kept winning over me.”
Kairo rubbed his jaw slowly, listening.
“I didn’t need money anymore,” I said. “I needed you. And the only time I felt like I truly had your undivided attention… was when we were having sex.”
Sydnee didn’t interrupt. She nodded, allowing me to keep going.
“So I became hyper-fixated on it. I wanted sex all the time. Multiple times a day, everyday. Not just because of desire… but because it was the only moment where I felt fully chosen.”
Tears fell from Kairo’s eyes.
“When we were having sex, you weren’t checking emails. You weren’t answering calls. You weren’t thinking about deals. You were just mine.”
I wiped my cheeks. “But then you started getting tired. And every time you said you were exhausted… or rolled over to sleep… It felt like rejection. It made me feel like I wanted you more than you wanted me. And then one night, you said something about a hall pass.”
Kairo’s head lifted immediately.
“You said it like it was nothing, but it crushed me. Instead of hearing a joke… I heard confirmation that my husband believed someone else might be able to give me what he couldn’t.”
“And what did you feel in that moment, Khloe?” Sydnee asked.
“Lonely and unwanted… while standing inside my own marriage.”
Her pen tapped against her notebook. “Once loneliness enters a marriage… the mind starts searching for relief. Kairo, do you want to say anything back to that?”
I stared down at my hands, embarrassed by how exposed I felt. Like pieces of me I didn’t even understand were now sitting in the middle of the room for inspection.
Kairo rubbed his hands together, thinking.
“I never wanted you to feel like I didn’t want more kids because it was never that. We had plans before we found out you were pregnant with Kennedi. Real plans of figuring out who we were as adults before becoming parents.”
“You loved being Kennedi’s mom. I never questioned that. But… sometimes I felt like you hated what motherhood cost you.”
My brows pulled together.
“I felt like you carried this grief about becoming a mom so young. You sacrificed everything. Your twenties didn’t look how you wanted it to look. You were studying and building a career while rocking a baby. I watched you fight to find yourself again.”
Tears blurred my vision.
“I thought…” He exhaled, searching for the right words. “…if we had another child, you’d lose that freedom that you finally got, all over again.”
“I didn’t want you back in survival mode. Sleepless nights, breastfeeding schedules, and teaching colors and numbers while trying to rediscover who Khloe was outside of being someone’s mama.”
My lips trembled.
“I wanted you to live, to travel, to dress up, to laugh, and feel young again. You had just started coming out of that postpartum depression fog, even though neither of us wanted to call it that.”
I froze.
“I saw the exhaustion and sadness you tried to hide. I thought you wanted another baby because you were searching for purpose again,” he confessed. “And I couldn’t sit there and watch you pile more responsibility onto yourself when you were finally starting to breathe.”
I covered my mouth, sobbing. I had spent years believing he was being selfish. And all along… he had done everything to protect me.
“I thought I was helping you,” he whispered. “Not denying you.”
My shoulders shook as I placed my head in my lap crying.
“But I was wrong,” he said. “Because while I was trying to protect you… I stopped showing up for you. I got tired and instead of letting you see that… I just pulled away.”
He shook his head slowly. “The way I handled it made you feel unwanted, and I hate myself for that. You are all I’ve ever wanted, Khloe. Since we were kids. Since before we even knew what love really meant.”
My heart broke hearing it.
“I thought if I just worked a little harder… fixed a few more things… made life easier… then I’d finally have time to come back and give you everything you deserved.”
His eyes filled with tears. “But I learned that life doesn’t wait on your timing and neither does love. I planned to slow down, but by the time I got to that point.. you weren’t waiting on me anymore.”
For the first time since everything exploded, I didn’t feel like I was defending myself or preparing for another emotional blow.
Sydnee closed her notebook. “I want to talk to you both about something,” she said softly. “And it may sound simple… but it’s actually the reason most marriages either survive or collapse.”
Her eyes moved between us.
“Mind games.”
The words made my stomach tighten.
“We don’t just play mind games with other people,” she continued. “We play them with ourselves first. The mind is powerful. It protects us, comforts us, justifies us… and sometimes it lies to us.”
“You both told yourselves stories that made sense in your own heads.”
She pointed at Kairo. “You told yourself working harder meant loving your family even while pushing them away.”
Then she came to me. “And you told yourself seeking emotional connection elsewhere meant finally loving yourself.”
Neither of us spoke.
“And here’s the part most people miss… Neither of you were trying to destroy your marriage.
You were both trying to survive inside it.
The mind convinces us that what we’re doing is reasonable…
because it protects our pain. But when we stay inside our own thoughts too long, we stop checking those thoughts against reality. ”
She tapped her temple. “We forget that the person sitting across from us has an entirely different experience happening at the same time.”
“You both said today that you wanted love, partnership, attention, security, and peace. And the irony is… you already had it.”
I looked at Kairo and he looked back at me.
“But somewhere along the way, you forgot that this life and marriage was once exactly what you prayed for. We ask for things in one season, then life changes us… and we forget why we wanted them in the first place. People, marriage, and love evolves. Evolution isn’t the problem.”
“It becomes easier when you communicate your evolution. When you allow your partner to grow with you instead of assuming they should already know where you are emotionally. Right now, you are standing at a crossroads. Ego or healing. Your ego wants to protect pride. Your ego wants punishment. Your ego wants someone to win and someone to lose, but marriage doesn’t survive ego. ”
She leaned back. “So I need you both to ask yourselves one question. Do you want to move forward… and right your wrongs?”
My heart pounded.
“Because from where I’m sitting, this is fixable.”
The word fixable felt like oxygen entering my lungs.
“You have history, friendship, respect, shared growth, and a child who clearly comes from love. This isn’t a marriage without foundation. And speaking of your child… you will need to have a tough conversation with her.”
“If you two feel this level of confusion and hurt,” Sydnee said, “imagine what she feels watching the people she believes are perfect struggle in silence. Tell her you’re proud of her.
Correct any ways you may have unintentionally made her feel controlled or unseen.
Show her that accountability exists in adulthood too.
That alone will heal more than you realize. ”
“I’m not asking you to solve everything today. Healing doesn’t happen in one conversation. But life is short and things can change in the blink of an eye. Be mindful of that when you leave this room.”
She picked up her bag to stand. “I believe you two can do amazing work together, and if you ever decide to include your daughter in this process, I would be honored to help guide that journey.”
“I see great things here for you and this… is just the beginning.”